Chapter 43: The Dreams – Part 2
[Musical selection]
He woke with a start. It took him a moment to realize that he was inside a room and not in the water in the midst of the woods.
For all that it had felt chilly just a moment ago, the room felt overwarm even with the windows open. He looked at Kashi and noticed that she had turned onto her side in her sleep, but her breathing remained even and steady.
He got up to turn on the overhead fan before laying back down. He fought sleep this time, but couldn't think of getting out of bed. He wanted to stay near her like this while she slept. Maybe it was because he fought it, because the sleep came much quicker than before, not seizing him, but knocking him over.
***
The bark of the tree behind her bruised her skin, an abrasion that snapped her out of her erotic fantasy. She didn't know where he was… she hadn't seen him since that night at the pond when he had surprised her. That was almost a month ago. For several weeks after that, she had fought off all thoughts about him successfully. She had stopped coming to the woods as well. She had hated him for ruining her refuge… the only place in the world where she could get away from the judgment and fear and lust. Then she had found the illam so unbearable that even the possibility of running into him hadn't seemed so terrible and she had made a return. That had been a week ago.
The first day while she roamed the woods, she had been tense the whole time that she would run into him unexpectedly.
It didn't happen.
By the second and third day, she was more relaxed, but still hypervigilant.
He was still nowhere to be seen.
When the fourth and fifth day passed without his presence, there was a sense of relief, she thought.
The sixth day, while in the water, a long vine that had fallen in had brushed across her body and she had jumped back startled that it was him.
She hadn't been prepared for the disappointment that had swept through her when she found the floating vine.
That night she had been struck by the most alarming dreams… she was letting him do everything to her that she had thought she despised. Her husband had been impotent and had taken his frustration about it out on her. Not that she had realized that that was what the problem was in the beginning. She had not been thrilled about getting married anyways and did not have much feeling for him one way or the other when her father had arranged it for her. But such was the case for all women of her stature. They got transferred from one illam to another and spend the rest of their life at the mercy of wherever they ended up. Her own family had always considered her a curse, her rages and apparent… uniqueness… allowing for fear to overtake any love they may have had for her once upon a time… Even though she had not thought much of her husband, she had been hopeful about meeting the women at the new illam, women who knew nothing of her, and thus giving a new chance to make some sort of companionship… to find at least one person who liked her… all her hopes had been dashed quickly enough when her husband had tried night after night to make his body do the impossible. He put all the blame on her and had told her that it was because she was not attractive that his body wouldn't comply. She had learned to tune out his taunts; such things never bothered her. However, when he had started demanding that she strip for him so that his body would obey him, she had become angry. Had resisted violently. He had never achieved the aim of stripping her. And she had seen him grow afraid of her… it had served its purpose and she had been glad that she had her anger and whatever unexplainable power that she had as her defense… but then he had started locking her in the room. He had told everyone in the family that she was unruly and arrogant and a veritable monster. Given that she had never had any friends, she had also never learned how to make any… and she hadn't known how to appeal to the women in the house who were all much different than her. And then the rumors had started that she had dark powers. She had wanted to laugh. If she had had true dark powers, she would have killed her husband. Then, a few months after, her husband keeled over from a coconut falling on his head. She had wondered whether she was quite human when all she had wanted to do was laugh when she heard of how he died. She had held her tongue though and of course the people at the illam had put her idiot husband's idiotic death on her head too. Initially, she had been glad that he was gone. He had made her starve more days than she cared to count. But then, she realized when time passed that even if he had been a pathetic excuse for a human being whose entire existence had been made more impotent than the tiny thing he carried between his legs by his utter lack of respect for those of her gender, he had still served the vital role of being a protector just by being her husband. It was only a few months after his death that one of his cousins – a married one at that – tried to proposition her. She had been too taken aback initially to catch his meaning, but when he had tried to grab onto her hand, she had caught on. She had whispered to him that she would cut his hand off if he so much as dared ever again to touch her. He hadn't tried again, she had put the fear of the Devil into him, but she had made a powerful enemy, she had realized later. There was nothing more dangerous than a cunning human being who has been spited. His tales of her added to the ever-growing pile. It still took two more years for her to realize that she was not disagreeable in looks as her husband had made her out to be. In fact, unbeknownst to her, she had been quite beautiful all along… she didn't know at what point she stopped fighting it and just accepted it for what it was… The men always looked at her; it made the women hate her. She couldn't help either situation, but that was the extent of it. No one touched her. She had fed their fear of her enough that none of the men who desired her ever actually made a move to put their thoughts into action. She was grateful for such small favors that her reputation afforded her.
From her experiences thus far, she had decided that her life would forever preclude a foray into the erotic art. Men viewed women as being creatures made for their comfort – for pleasure and for servitude. From what she could see, women got nothing in return. She wanted no part of it.
Which all made her current predicament that much more confusing.
She had never experienced desire before. In fact, before he termed it as such, she hadn't realized that that is what it was.
The thought that he had disappeared just as quickly as he had appeared in her life was…
The disappointment was keen as she felt it now and her hands dug into the bark of the tree behind her again.
"You must know that you are calling to me when you do that." She heard his voice and opened her eyes to see him standing in front of her, as if he had been conjured up from thin air.
"When I do what?" she asked, trying to calm her racing heart at his sudden presence.
"When you yearn for me so strongly." He said as he moved closer.
"I do not…" she started, but gasped when he pulled her away from the trunk and up into his arms.
"I can sense you even from far away, Devaki. I can sense you stronger than I can sense my own feelings." He whispered and she swallowed hard.
What madness was this between them?
"That is impossible." She told him just for the sake of refuting the implausibility of what he said.
"You were not ready for this before… And so I couldn't come." He said as he brought her closer to him. His upper body was bare and she felt her fingers dig into his arms in a volatile mix of desire and aggression as she tried to push him away, knowing that he wouldn't let her go this time.
"I am still not…" she started, but he suddenly brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed the inside of her wrist, making her gasp in pleasure.
"No woman has ever been more ready than you are for me in this moment…" he whispered before he kissed his way up her palm and to the tip of her index finger.
"Of all of the presumptuous things…" she managed to bite out, but then he sucked on the tip of her finger and cut off not just the rest of her words, but her thoughts as well…
[To be continued…]
****
Edited by -publicenemy- - 12 years ago
Book Talk
CID
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
703