Guys I think I understood CM's problem, I doesnot have problem with Anandi but I is able to sense Anandi's not complete willingness to accept the marriage, as wee can see in the 1st meeting she was not happy as anandi herself didnot seen to be happy her 2nd though to go ahead or not.And on sagai day also with Anandi with smile touched her feet she gave blessing without 2nd thought n afterwards when Anandi thought so much time to put the ring n then took blessing she was not happy to bless.
I think as she is a widow she can understand how different it will be to come out of ur 1st marriage n the thought of second marriage, I feel her m,eaning for nayi dulhana mean not that Anandi is second hand but that Anandi once gone through a bad experience of marriage will she be able to come out of that n fulfil all the duty n irresponsible of wife n keep Shiv happy.
When Anandi happily came for sagai she thought she is happy so she can move on n whenever Anandi has sad of doubtful face that doubt of shiv's happiness comes.