ManVeer Short Scenes - *Short Update - page 25** - Page 15

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MsLuscious thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

Mais i love the way u write ur all scenes r intense and beautifuly written love ur w0rk do write m0re n thankx al0t for da pm:)
wadi..doll thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Wow Beautifully written yaar love em alott ..
_Poulomi_ thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
Maisy i am so in love with your Writing!
Finally you are over your Writer's block!

Scene 20:

The way you described Manyata's childish playfulness was so CUTE. I wish the CVs had never Butchered her character and maintained this charm.😭 The best part in this Scene was the ending...

"He always saw her...

...and he always fell for her.

But she never did...

...see or fall."


i love these unsaid emotions, which makes you wanna ponder on them all the time.

Scene 21:

Made me kinda SAD...

i guess she wont say yes...

Scene 22:

Thank you for including that "giving mark" scene... and you interpreted in a very nice way...and the line,

"Like it or not Princess, but you are mine. And what's mine, remains mine."

Killer!!!!!!! I tell You.

To UV: Yeah Baby go get her Dude. She is only yours.

Scene 23:

i dont know what to write about this scene, cuz its so emotional, it hit right here...In my heart.

This is what i feel:


these small memories here and there sometimes are so refreshing and beautiful.
And this line...

"Princess, I can see you! Hum aap ko pakar lenge!"

"Yuvraj! Hum bhag jaenge! Kabhi nahin pakar paenge aap...!"

CUTE!
Edited by poulomi12 - 13 years ago
sourmisery thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: Muskaan.C

Wonderful job! I especially liked part 20. At first, it seems like a typical fairy tale, but then there's a feeling of sadness that comes when you realize that his feelings aren't reciprocated. Love how you portrayed that, it had a good balance. Keep up the excellent writing!



Thank you! It's my fav part as well! 😊 Actually, I put the last lines on second thoughts. The original idea was something else but this one played out better. If I was from Rajasthan or knew it's culture, oh boy! The things I could write! 😛


Originally posted by: KriaReyansh

beautifully written!

keep up the great work :)



Originally posted by: Angel_20

hey gal thnks for the PM!!!😉

nicely written really beautifully i loved..⭐️ 5 stars for an outstanding writer..😉
really plzzz do continue to write more i would love to read more..😉😳



Originally posted by: salekh1

😳Beautifully written

Loveed it
awesomeee
Thank you for the pm😃



Originally posted by: nasghar

great work... really nicely written :)





Originally posted by: ..Ananya-kmh..

Sooo beautifully written..amazing!! Continue soon :)



Originally posted by: adventure_gurl

lovely job! I don't know if I have you on my buddy list will check later



Originally posted by: adventure_gurl

lovely job! I don't know if I have you on my buddy list will check later



Originally posted by: pri01

Hi Mais this is awesome ⭐️ beautifully written love them

Keep it up dear God Bless U
Thxs for the pm 🤗



Originally posted by: manveerlover


Mais i love the way u write ur all scenes r intense and beautifuly written love ur w0rk do write m0re n thankx al0t for da pm:)



Originally posted by: wadi..doll

Wow Beautifully written yaar love em alott ..



Thank you everyone for your responses! 😃
sourmisery thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Visit Streak 180 Thumbnail + 7
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: poulomi12

Maisy i am so in love with your Writing!

Finally you are over your Writer's block!

Scene 20:

The way you described Manyata's childish playfulness was so CUTE. I wish the CVs had never Butchered her character and maintained this charm.😭 The best part in this Scene was the ending...

"He always saw her...

...and he always fell for her.

But she never did...

...see or fall."


i love these unsaid emotions, which makes you wanna ponder on them all the time.

Scene 21:

Made me kinda SAD...

i guess she wont say yes...

Scene 22:

Thank you for including that "giving mark" scene... and you interpreted in a very nice way...and the line,

"Like it or not Princess, but you are mine. And what's mine, remains mine."

Killer!!!!!!! I tell You.

To UV: Yeah Baby go get her Dude. She is only yours.

Scene 23:

i dont know what to write about this scene, cuz its so promotional, it hit right here...In my heart.

This is what i feel:


these small memories here and there sometimes are so refreshing and beautiful.
And this line...

"Princess, I can see you! Hum aap ko pakar lenge!"

"Yuvraj! Hum bhag jaenge! Kabhi nahin pakar paenge aap...!"

CUTE!



Hush! Finally a good old lamba wala reply. Dang! I miss them. Between you and I, keep giving me detailed replies. Lolz, mehnat vusul hojati hai! 😆

Scene 20 - Yaar! I so wanted to give it a Rajasthani Royal touch but since I don't know a lot of that so I couldn't fulfil it. Actually this was a very VM inspired kinda scene. Dunno how to say but you know how editors merge the scenes that Manyata is dancing in the street and Uday is watching her, gah! I love that style! Glad to say that I was satisfied with it. The ending for it was totally on the spot. I was like, thora change hojae. Let him love and let the child play oblivious to his love! 😉

Scene 21 - Don't say that. She could've said yes. But my lips are sealed 😛

Scene 22 - I have this strange fondness for incidents where the guy gives the girl a scar. I have no idea why! This one has a history. When I didn't watch the show, my best friend who watched it told me about the story. When it came to the scar thingy, she said that Uday slashed Manyata when she was a child. She didn't say it was intentional so I thought he deliberately did it. Wo tou baad mein pata chala that they were kids and it was an accident. Anyway! I still liked the idea so thought of playing around with it😆

Scene 23 - Result of powercuts, dark house, charger's light, cooking dinner and loneliness I tell you. It was a hunch, glad it payed out. Tu roti bohat hai. And I like it! Dunno why but feel glad that you enjoy my words that much!

Love ya Polo! 😳
_Poulomi_ thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago
maisy i made a mistake of writing "promotional" in place of "emotional" in the 23rd scene.😛
_Poulomi_ thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 2
Posted: 13 years ago

Originally posted by: -Mais-



Hush! Finally a good old lamba wala reply. Dang! I miss them. Between you and I, keep giving me detailed replies. Lolz, mehnat vusul hojati hai! 😆

Scene 20 - Yaar! I so wanted to give it a Rajasthani Royal touch but since I don't know a lot of that so I couldn't fulfil it. Actually this was a very VM inspired kinda scene. Dunno how to say but you know how editors merge the scenes that Manyata is dancing in the street and Uday is watching her, gah! I love that style! Glad to say that I was satisfied with it. The ending for it was totally on the spot. I was like, thora change hojae. Let him love and let the child play oblivious to his love! 😉
THIS! yeah THIS! This is what i love about your writing.<3
Scene 21 - Don't say that. She could've said yes. But my lips are sealed 😛
i know! this is the best part of your writing... its a 50-50 chance at the ending...

Scene 22 - I have this strange fondness for incidents where the guy gives the girl a scar. I have no idea why! This one has a history. When I didn't watch the show, my best friend who watched it told me about the story. When it came to the scar thingy, she said that Uday slashed Manyata when she was a child. She didn't say it was intentional so I thought he deliberately did it. Wo tou baad mein pata chala that they were kids and it was an accident. Anyway! I still liked the idea so thought of playing around with it😆
You know when that scar was first shown, i felt there will be some real plot or drama behind it. I am shocked they did not put it any other scene! But you played around nicely with it!
Scene 23 - Result of powercuts, dark house, charger's light, cooking dinner and loneliness I tell you. It was a hunch, glad it payed out. Tu roti bohat hai. And I like it! Dunno why but feel glad that you enjoy my words that much!
i didnt know power cuts fueled those...geez then i hope theres powercuts everyday!😆
Love ya Polo! 😳muah mousie!<33


Maahzabeen thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
loved every part...
keep it up
-StarlitFire- thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
firstly extremly sorry for such a late comment..was inactive for sometime..
but really these r such beautiful scenes..
heart-touching ones...
keep rocking..
sourmisery thumbnail
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Posted: 13 years ago
the shortest and the worst update ever!!! 😡
24.
(original idea = Polo
using and messing it up without permission)

So close.

It was like he started walking on the edge every time he saw her. At first, this walk was easier to control because he only moved towards it keeping a safe distance in mind. His alert brain and teasing words kept his actions in check.

Now, it was changing.

She always had this don't-give-a-damn air around her, all her actions reflected that attitude of hers. Her laughs, her tears, her carefree attitude, her responsible words; she was a kaleidoscope of emotions. Every time he saw her, he discovered something new.

This, bothered him. A lot.

He was the kind who took pride in knowing the nature of a person within two minutes. All his life, the first impression of the person was enough to tell him just what was the limit of that person. But she, she was so different.

She made him crack. Made him lose control. Made him stop and stare. Made him walk towards her, close to her just to explore her. She woke the devil inside him, not the flirtatious one but the real devil; the one which could consume everything that came in his path.

Just like now, she was oh-so-innocently standing in the sun, running hands through her wet hair. He was at a distance from her but he could feel that she was humming something. The smile on her face, the sparkle in her eyes; it disgusted him. She had no right to be so carefree and happy when he was struggling just to keep his emotions in check and not snap.

Without knowing what he was doing, he started walking towards her. He crossed the distance between them in a few strides. Standing behind her for a moment, he grabbed her arm and pulled her. Turning her around, he pinned her on the wall.

Surprise replaced shock and then fury in her eyes. There was a fire in her eyes, not the kind that he had though.

"Ye kya kar rahe ho?! Choro mujhe!" She struggled to loosen his grip but he strengthened his grip more. She winced with pain but he didn't care. It was nothing, nothing, compared to what he was feeling.

"Not so fast Princess..." Moving a inch closer to her face, he whispered. The fury in her eyes was again turning into shock. He could feel her disturbed state but he ignored it.

"Humein dekhne tou do, tum mein aisa hai kya jo humein samajh nahin ata." Smirking, he trailed his finger from her temple down to her jaw. Unlike before her eyes didn't move with his finger, instead they were fixed on his'. This fired him more.

"Aisa hai kya tum mein jo tumari qareeb hone se humein apna hosh nahin rehta? Tum akhir konsi mitti se banni jo humein apne aap ko sambhalna parta hai. Just what the hell are you?!"

His voice was a dangerous whisper, his face only centimeters away from her. He was so close to her, he could rip off her skin which refused to be affected by him. Rip it off and let the new skin which would do his bidding like everyone else. And he had every intention of doing so.

Her eyes became wide in shock; fear reflected in them. The fear which always pleased him, took him by surprise this time. It was the fear which made him realize what he was doing. Loosening his grip on her, he let go of her and walked away without a single glance back.

So close...he had come so close. So very close to her, so very close of unleashing the devil inside him. So very close into accepting what he had always thought impossible.

So very close to the accepting that she affected her...in ways he could never imagine.






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