Posted:
Everyone is entitled to have a opinion.
Sharing mine not putting it up for a 'debate' or 'contest'.
If you disagree please refrain from commenting.
As I love to respect & not contest others pov, I agree to it or not.
Thank you.
Woman - Self respect, Love & Priorities.
The episode today I found more dedicated to Geet & Pammi - as woman & wife.
'Women have a forgiving heart'.
- who knows it better than these two women.
Geet who forgave her sinner to let go of her past.
But refuses to forgive her husband's two rude words for the same future that she wished for by forgiving Dev.
A future she is sure of, future as present she knows Maan will only make a fairytale of with his love & devotion for her.
Future that she walked out of by refusing to understand & forgive the only person & relationship where 'apology' was never even needed.
Yes the one we love & trust their words hurt us the most than the actions & words of people who do not matter to us.
But don't we understand & reason their emotions more than our own, its their pain that affect us more than our own.
A pain masked in fury she felt not but felt alone his words.
Words that were his reaction at seeing his wife forgive her rapist & not count his opinion about same, at seeing his wife accept Dev as family when he himself dint coz Dev ruined her life.
She forgave all but the spring of forgiveness went dry that flooded peace & contentment at all who wronged her fails to appease the thirst of the man who loves her to death, man who let go of all his anger, pride, self & has humbled himself only to sooth her pain.
Man whom she owes her self respect, honor, confidence, pride & life to.
Pammi on the other hand who may not have suffered the biggest blow as Geet be it her family wanting to kill her, or rape but to her the everyday life as wife is as much as a curse as has been blessing to Geet after winning her place in Maan's heart & being married to him.
Pammi may have never needed to forgive something big as rape or murder but she forgives her husband & his family every second for a future that like today holds no assurance & void of any happiness or love for her.
Her man may have never questioned her self respect as Maan questioned Geet, but her man never gave her the respect of having self respect in the first place.
What is a bigger offense or bigger question of 'self respect' for a woman, a question on its existence or no credit at all for having one!
**********
'I could never love where I could not respect.'
A friend of mine had once questioned me what MaanEet is all about, I said respect, trust, understanding, pride & love put in this order.
She said to her its 'Love for Geet in Maan's heart & Respect for Maan in Geet's'. I had asked her explain, she said love is never possible until u respect that person.
To respect that person he/she needs to earn your trust by not their words but by their actions.
Maan from the day he crossed Geet's life, a rude stranger - to savior - to Boss - to friend - to lover - to husband. In every role he has earned her trust & respect, trust that when he is their nothing wrong will happen to her, trust that he will stand for & with her forever.
This trust made Geet respect the man who never missed a moment to yell at her, yelling that she understood was his way of grooming her for her 'today'. Trust & respect that made her go on her knees to cry to Baba ji the moment she realized the love, the place he had made in her heart.
Same holds true for Maan, he disliked woman but that never meant he hated the gender in itself or saw all as same, his respect for his Dadi but not NT, his staff having women in equal number as men shows he respected those who earned it.
Geet who cried for help earned his sympathy but Geet the woman who rebelled & made herself independent from the crude society earned his trust & respect by her dedication to her work, her fight & he before he could know he was in love with her.
Trust, respect & love that only grows with time as she became from his life to mother of their child & he her soul mate not Dev's brother.
But Geet soon after 'being assured' of Maan in her life we saw a big difference from that of a girl who had rushed to HP to stop Rasika risking her own life.
Geet she knew Maan's reason for not trusting Arjun yet in a strangers presence we saw her go against Maan's decision, she dint respect his decision he did hers & allowed her to go ahead & give the contract to Arjun.
Geet we saw interfer in his professional matter when she made Pinky not listen to her Boss, Maan respected it by not blasting at Pinky but felt a need to clear himself that he is her companion but their Boss who owes respect & his words are to be followed.
Geet we saw not respecting Maan's words when he told her he did not want her helping Dadimaa with Dev, when she went ahead & forgave Dev knowing clearly Maan's thoughts about the same, played holi with him knowing how revolting it could be for her husband.
A wife who acknowledged that man as a family who her husband has not accepted yet.
Respect that she dint show & that Maan felt when Dev questioned him 'If she can move on why not you?'.
Question that made him question her self respect 'How can you forgive the man who your husband hates to the core'.
But did the incident, the question make Maan lose his respect for Geet? No.
He is here regretting, he is here for his love that springs from his respect for her & their relationship.
Respect that has made him humble himself to her anger, respect that makes him stand his humiliation, respect that dint let him tolerate her humiliation when he jumped into the ring.
Respect that was absent when Geet walked away without understanding him, absent when she questioned his love, absent as she bears witness to see him serve others, absent when she sees them walk over his pride, absent when she pushes him away from her.
'Respect is what we owe; love, what we give'
If its Geet's standing for herself that made Maan respect her & love her.
Its Pammi's patience & tolerance that Teji should come to respect & love.
Pammi never shared(as shown) such a deep bonding with her man, her man who does not value her devotion to him & his family but thinks it is what he owes from his wife, man who is blind to her love & her concern for him earns her more harsh words, man who tells her your life is no more your own nor your decisions.
A man who chides her for her innocent talks, her attempt to share with him their life.
When he does she stops, she stops not out of fear but respect.
Respect for her husband & their relationship that makes her go silent, she shows her respect for his need to silence when he fails to show for her need to share.
She questions him in her own way - he answers or not.
We saw that when she reminded him that she is not his 'tractor driver' but wife.
But she shows her respect by not cross questioning but accepting his commands in presence of others be it today infront of Beeji or earlier infront of Lucky.
'Humility is the ability to give up your pride and still retain your dignity.'
And it is this dignity that this woman has the aura of that makes Geet's 'self respect' seem almost selfish when compared to Pammi's strength of tolerance.
*********
'Anger is wound gone mad'
It did for Maan when he saw Geet not counting his opinion, moving away from him & when he saw himself distanced from her.
His pain that took form of anger & resulted in his emotional outburst.
Geet who always never fails to remind him of his 'bad anger' herself fails to see the mirror herself.
If it was his anger for Dev that dint let Maan see her reasons for moving on.
Its her blind anger that has made her fail to understand his pain when he questioned her.
Failed to make her try or confront or comfort him, give their life & love a chance to talk & sort out but she walked away.
Her anger that makes her not introduce the true man to her family, she rather stands unashamed witness to their bad mouthing the man they know not of, man who fought his family for her.
Her anger that makes her immune to his suffering, plight & humiliation.
Her anger that has made her wipe out all his good deeds from her mind.
Yes in love there is no place for obligation it is as much true as is the fact that there is no place for offense too, if there is no 'thank you' then how is there any place for 'sorry'!
Anger that clouded her mind so much that his pain reach her late or not.
A wife who has seen her man scrunch in pain should have been the one to prepare the 'laip' to reach him sooth his pain for a single moment raise above 'self'.
As a woman & family Pammi before feeding herself felt the concern to feed Lucky first, thats a woman's motherly heart.
But we find Geet sitting to eat & it took Pammi - Beeji's mentioning about how much in pain Maan is & how lonely he must be that reminded her of her husband's pain.
Balwant meant nothing to Pammi but as a woman she feeling her pain made him the laip something that Beeji had ordered Lachi to do.
But Geet reminded of his pain time & again by her family she dint reach him but again locked herself in 'self'.
Anger that made her blindfold herself to his wounds & leave him there in pain at his demand that 'you tend to me'.
Anger is not a demon that Maan alone needs to fight but Geet too.
Maan's anger makes him hurt himself more but Geet's makes her hurt the people who love her more, now be it Dadi & her family who are in dark about the truth or Maan.
Maan's anger ends with reflection of his action & he regrets it immediately but Geet's anger prolongs to its trying limit & only appeases when the other person tired of it lets go of her.
Pammi on the other hand refuses to be angry, its not alone coz it will ignored as her love has been but because to her loving that person is more important than being angry at him.
*********
'I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.'
Having your priorities in life sorted in order is very important.
To Maan it has always been Geet first, to Geet it was her Baby first.
Maan never regretted hearing it as he knew the reasons for it & that went to make Baby equally important to him.
Now it was his family first, a small action on his part that spoke for itself how much he values 'them' more than himself.
Returning from Shimla when the car lost its control & was about to collide Geet closed her face with her hand but Maan hide her within his frame & himself took the blow.
Its not that I am saying Geet loves him less but he makes sure to express it through his actions more than in words alone.
Priorities we hold important in our life also reflect to our loved ones that we care for them, they mean all to us.
To Maan being present at a normal check up of Geet was more important than his meeting worth 400 cr. hearing of which made her swell in pride.
But Geet disappointed him when she dint count his opinion before forgiving Dev, he waited but when she reached to talk to him but the thing he needed to hear first to be able to hear her at all, he did not find her say that first & disappointed & fearing to show her his vulnerable emotions he leaves.
Today too, as a wife Geet's first priority, thought should have been her feeling his pain - she did when all reminded her of it, tending to his wounds.
But again when Maan was expecting to hear from her few words of concern she mentioned Dev not her understanding & feeling for his pain.
Few assume that she did to see if Maan still is bothered with Dev, insecure of him or has let go of his hatred.
To answer this we need to think -
Who is Dev? Geet's sinner is the only answer to it.
Nothing changes the fact that for a husband, should not for a woman too...She forgave Dev but that does not make it her right to expect or demand same from Maan.
If she felt it was her decision only & so went ahead with it, its his only too.
Some I hear felt she did so as she thinks Maan doubt's her character, sadly but question on her character was never raised it was on her self respect.
As to Geet misunderstanding it, no she dint ...how can it be when in her self talk itself she said 'apnai mujhai begairat kaise kahai diya'.
Assuming things is more like drawing made in air, only you see it.
So it is much better if we speak whats shown than what we 'assume' it to be.
Today's scene is more to do with Geet's priority than Maan being insecure of Dev.
Any man in that state expects the first thing on his wife's priority list will be 'concern', but it wasn't she mentioned Dev.
She did it given by her nature she cleared her stand it wasn't explaining to him, if Geet assumed that Maan spoke for her character then sure she could have explained.
But she only informed him.
She knows Maan met Dev from both Maan having gone missing same day & his fake reason that she had guessed immediately.
Her talking about Dev was more to do with her bursting his confidence that she has come to him coz she cares for him.
Obviously it disappointed him & he let go of her hand, but this time around Maan being one who learns from his mistakes he did not walk away but moved the conversation.
Its to do more with an husband's emotions & expectations than a man's being insecure.
Pammi on the other hand knows her priorities, her husband & her family thats her small world, she rather seek her happiness & peace in the happiness of her loved ones than away them.
*********
Two woman belonging to small town, with similar upbringing & values but its their experience with life that has made them what they are today.
Pammi may lack 'spine' to stand for herself as I see few term her with.
But she sure holds more understanding of relationship than others here.
Be it even the wise & experienced Beeji, who still fails to see love in Geet's eyes at the mention of Maan, sadness at being away from him than coz of meeting him(Dev they mistook as Maan having met Geet).
But it never goes unnoticed by Pammi who knows Geet much less than her Maasi & who knows less about being loved & happy in marriage.
To her Geet is open book she never questioned Geet but answered her rather, be it by unknowingly presenting the difference of status both woman have as a wife, as bahu.
Be it by her soothing talk to trust Babaji as guide.
Geet did not reach her as a woman to share her pain seeing her plight.
But Pammi did.
She reached Geet & read to her what she reads in Geet's eyes itself & advised her right -
'Never let a problem to be solved become more important than the person to be loved.'
Nandita.
Sharing mine not putting it up for a 'debate' or 'contest'.
If you disagree please refrain from commenting.
As I love to respect & not contest others pov, I agree to it or not.
Thank you.
Woman - Self respect, Love & Priorities.
The episode today I found more dedicated to Geet & Pammi - as woman & wife.
'Women have a forgiving heart'.
- who knows it better than these two women.
Geet who forgave her sinner to let go of her past.
But refuses to forgive her husband's two rude words for the same future that she wished for by forgiving Dev.
A future she is sure of, future as present she knows Maan will only make a fairytale of with his love & devotion for her.
Future that she walked out of by refusing to understand & forgive the only person & relationship where 'apology' was never even needed.
Yes the one we love & trust their words hurt us the most than the actions & words of people who do not matter to us.
But don't we understand & reason their emotions more than our own, its their pain that affect us more than our own.
A pain masked in fury she felt not but felt alone his words.
Words that were his reaction at seeing his wife forgive her rapist & not count his opinion about same, at seeing his wife accept Dev as family when he himself dint coz Dev ruined her life.
She forgave all but the spring of forgiveness went dry that flooded peace & contentment at all who wronged her fails to appease the thirst of the man who loves her to death, man who let go of all his anger, pride, self & has humbled himself only to sooth her pain.
Man whom she owes her self respect, honor, confidence, pride & life to.
Pammi on the other hand who may not have suffered the biggest blow as Geet be it her family wanting to kill her, or rape but to her the everyday life as wife is as much as a curse as has been blessing to Geet after winning her place in Maan's heart & being married to him.
Pammi may have never needed to forgive something big as rape or murder but she forgives her husband & his family every second for a future that like today holds no assurance & void of any happiness or love for her.
Her man may have never questioned her self respect as Maan questioned Geet, but her man never gave her the respect of having self respect in the first place.
What is a bigger offense or bigger question of 'self respect' for a woman, a question on its existence or no credit at all for having one!
**********
'I could never love where I could not respect.'
A friend of mine had once questioned me what MaanEet is all about, I said respect, trust, understanding, pride & love put in this order.
She said to her its 'Love for Geet in Maan's heart & Respect for Maan in Geet's'. I had asked her explain, she said love is never possible until u respect that person.
To respect that person he/she needs to earn your trust by not their words but by their actions.
Maan from the day he crossed Geet's life, a rude stranger - to savior - to Boss - to friend - to lover - to husband. In every role he has earned her trust & respect, trust that when he is their nothing wrong will happen to her, trust that he will stand for & with her forever.
This trust made Geet respect the man who never missed a moment to yell at her, yelling that she understood was his way of grooming her for her 'today'. Trust & respect that made her go on her knees to cry to Baba ji the moment she realized the love, the place he had made in her heart.
Same holds true for Maan, he disliked woman but that never meant he hated the gender in itself or saw all as same, his respect for his Dadi but not NT, his staff having women in equal number as men shows he respected those who earned it.
Geet who cried for help earned his sympathy but Geet the woman who rebelled & made herself independent from the crude society earned his trust & respect by her dedication to her work, her fight & he before he could know he was in love with her.
Trust, respect & love that only grows with time as she became from his life to mother of their child & he her soul mate not Dev's brother.
But Geet soon after 'being assured' of Maan in her life we saw a big difference from that of a girl who had rushed to HP to stop Rasika risking her own life.
Geet she knew Maan's reason for not trusting Arjun yet in a strangers presence we saw her go against Maan's decision, she dint respect his decision he did hers & allowed her to go ahead & give the contract to Arjun.
Geet we saw interfer in his professional matter when she made Pinky not listen to her Boss, Maan respected it by not blasting at Pinky but felt a need to clear himself that he is her companion but their Boss who owes respect & his words are to be followed.
Geet we saw not respecting Maan's words when he told her he did not want her helping Dadimaa with Dev, when she went ahead & forgave Dev knowing clearly Maan's thoughts about the same, played holi with him knowing how revolting it could be for her husband.
A wife who acknowledged that man as a family who her husband has not accepted yet.
Respect that she dint show & that Maan felt when Dev questioned him 'If she can move on why not you?'.
Question that made him question her self respect 'How can you forgive the man who your husband hates to the core'.
But did the incident, the question make Maan lose his respect for Geet? No.
He is here regretting, he is here for his love that springs from his respect for her & their relationship.
Respect that has made him humble himself to her anger, respect that makes him stand his humiliation, respect that dint let him tolerate her humiliation when he jumped into the ring.
Respect that was absent when Geet walked away without understanding him, absent when she questioned his love, absent as she bears witness to see him serve others, absent when she sees them walk over his pride, absent when she pushes him away from her.
'Respect is what we owe; love, what we give'
If its Geet's standing for herself that made Maan respect her & love her.
Its Pammi's patience & tolerance that Teji should come to respect & love.
Pammi never shared(as shown) such a deep bonding with her man, her man who does not value her devotion to him & his family but thinks it is what he owes from his wife, man who is blind to her love & her concern for him earns her more harsh words, man who tells her your life is no more your own nor your decisions.
A man who chides her for her innocent talks, her attempt to share with him their life.
When he does she stops, she stops not out of fear but respect.
Respect for her husband & their relationship that makes her go silent, she shows her respect for his need to silence when he fails to show for her need to share.
She questions him in her own way - he answers or not.
We saw that when she reminded him that she is not his 'tractor driver' but wife.
But she shows her respect by not cross questioning but accepting his commands in presence of others be it today infront of Beeji or earlier infront of Lucky.
'Humility is the ability to give up your pride and still retain your dignity.'
And it is this dignity that this woman has the aura of that makes Geet's 'self respect' seem almost selfish when compared to Pammi's strength of tolerance.
*********
'Anger is wound gone mad'
It did for Maan when he saw Geet not counting his opinion, moving away from him & when he saw himself distanced from her.
His pain that took form of anger & resulted in his emotional outburst.
Geet who always never fails to remind him of his 'bad anger' herself fails to see the mirror herself.
If it was his anger for Dev that dint let Maan see her reasons for moving on.
Its her blind anger that has made her fail to understand his pain when he questioned her.
Failed to make her try or confront or comfort him, give their life & love a chance to talk & sort out but she walked away.
Her anger that makes her not introduce the true man to her family, she rather stands unashamed witness to their bad mouthing the man they know not of, man who fought his family for her.
Her anger that makes her immune to his suffering, plight & humiliation.
Her anger that has made her wipe out all his good deeds from her mind.
Yes in love there is no place for obligation it is as much true as is the fact that there is no place for offense too, if there is no 'thank you' then how is there any place for 'sorry'!
Anger that clouded her mind so much that his pain reach her late or not.
A wife who has seen her man scrunch in pain should have been the one to prepare the 'laip' to reach him sooth his pain for a single moment raise above 'self'.
As a woman & family Pammi before feeding herself felt the concern to feed Lucky first, thats a woman's motherly heart.
But we find Geet sitting to eat & it took Pammi - Beeji's mentioning about how much in pain Maan is & how lonely he must be that reminded her of her husband's pain.
Balwant meant nothing to Pammi but as a woman she feeling her pain made him the laip something that Beeji had ordered Lachi to do.
But Geet reminded of his pain time & again by her family she dint reach him but again locked herself in 'self'.
Anger that made her blindfold herself to his wounds & leave him there in pain at his demand that 'you tend to me'.
Anger is not a demon that Maan alone needs to fight but Geet too.
Maan's anger makes him hurt himself more but Geet's makes her hurt the people who love her more, now be it Dadi & her family who are in dark about the truth or Maan.
Maan's anger ends with reflection of his action & he regrets it immediately but Geet's anger prolongs to its trying limit & only appeases when the other person tired of it lets go of her.
Pammi on the other hand refuses to be angry, its not alone coz it will ignored as her love has been but because to her loving that person is more important than being angry at him.
*********
'I don't want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.'
Having your priorities in life sorted in order is very important.
To Maan it has always been Geet first, to Geet it was her Baby first.
Maan never regretted hearing it as he knew the reasons for it & that went to make Baby equally important to him.
Now it was his family first, a small action on his part that spoke for itself how much he values 'them' more than himself.
Returning from Shimla when the car lost its control & was about to collide Geet closed her face with her hand but Maan hide her within his frame & himself took the blow.
Its not that I am saying Geet loves him less but he makes sure to express it through his actions more than in words alone.
Priorities we hold important in our life also reflect to our loved ones that we care for them, they mean all to us.
To Maan being present at a normal check up of Geet was more important than his meeting worth 400 cr. hearing of which made her swell in pride.
But Geet disappointed him when she dint count his opinion before forgiving Dev, he waited but when she reached to talk to him but the thing he needed to hear first to be able to hear her at all, he did not find her say that first & disappointed & fearing to show her his vulnerable emotions he leaves.
Today too, as a wife Geet's first priority, thought should have been her feeling his pain - she did when all reminded her of it, tending to his wounds.
But again when Maan was expecting to hear from her few words of concern she mentioned Dev not her understanding & feeling for his pain.
Few assume that she did to see if Maan still is bothered with Dev, insecure of him or has let go of his hatred.
To answer this we need to think -
Who is Dev? Geet's sinner is the only answer to it.
Nothing changes the fact that for a husband, should not for a woman too...She forgave Dev but that does not make it her right to expect or demand same from Maan.
If she felt it was her decision only & so went ahead with it, its his only too.
Some I hear felt she did so as she thinks Maan doubt's her character, sadly but question on her character was never raised it was on her self respect.
As to Geet misunderstanding it, no she dint ...how can it be when in her self talk itself she said 'apnai mujhai begairat kaise kahai diya'.
Assuming things is more like drawing made in air, only you see it.
So it is much better if we speak whats shown than what we 'assume' it to be.
Today's scene is more to do with Geet's priority than Maan being insecure of Dev.
Any man in that state expects the first thing on his wife's priority list will be 'concern', but it wasn't she mentioned Dev.
She did it given by her nature she cleared her stand it wasn't explaining to him, if Geet assumed that Maan spoke for her character then sure she could have explained.
But she only informed him.
She knows Maan met Dev from both Maan having gone missing same day & his fake reason that she had guessed immediately.
Her talking about Dev was more to do with her bursting his confidence that she has come to him coz she cares for him.
Obviously it disappointed him & he let go of her hand, but this time around Maan being one who learns from his mistakes he did not walk away but moved the conversation.
Its to do more with an husband's emotions & expectations than a man's being insecure.
Pammi on the other hand knows her priorities, her husband & her family thats her small world, she rather seek her happiness & peace in the happiness of her loved ones than away them.
*********
Two woman belonging to small town, with similar upbringing & values but its their experience with life that has made them what they are today.
Pammi may lack 'spine' to stand for herself as I see few term her with.
But she sure holds more understanding of relationship than others here.
Be it even the wise & experienced Beeji, who still fails to see love in Geet's eyes at the mention of Maan, sadness at being away from him than coz of meeting him(Dev they mistook as Maan having met Geet).
But it never goes unnoticed by Pammi who knows Geet much less than her Maasi & who knows less about being loved & happy in marriage.
To her Geet is open book she never questioned Geet but answered her rather, be it by unknowingly presenting the difference of status both woman have as a wife, as bahu.
Be it by her soothing talk to trust Babaji as guide.
Geet did not reach her as a woman to share her pain seeing her plight.
But Pammi did.
She reached Geet & read to her what she reads in Geet's eyes itself & advised her right -
'Never let a problem to be solved become more important than the person to be loved.'
Nandita.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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