~Kashish~
part 23
He didn't want to follow.. he wanted to feel it all ' as longer as he could.. he was craving for it ever since that night.. this was the only moment he felt whole..joined with her.. felt normal.. .
Geet hearts pounded really hard, chaotic emotions raged through her. When she was in Maan's arms, felt him deep inside her, it was easy to forget the world. But the reality ...the reality of their relation hit her hard, in full force.. filled with confusion & pain. She slowly slid to stand on her feet unfolded her hands on his chest. She wanted to push him away but she was lost in the feel of his toned hard muscle beneath his shirt, the sound of his raged heart beat, his scent mixed with hers, his face still burried in her hair near her ears.
She gathered her all strength with a deep breath forced him away. Maan looked everywhere else but her face. He pulled his pants up... trying to look more dignified with his still erect manhood, pulling his shirt out & straightening himself.
Geet - mujhe samjh nahi aata .. she almost cried that words in tearful whisper
he still couldn't dare to face her - I am sorry, I didn't mean that to happen
she snapped - what????
what was he apologizing for. For having s** with her. Or that it was not making love!!! because he had made it clear that it was just physical no emotions in it. He finally looked up to meet her gaze. Geet held breath.. was he feeling something more than wat he could admit. !!!
he parted her lips to say something.. she raised her hand to stop him..
Geet - yeh jo bhi kuch hain...Maan I don't want it.
He looked silently watching her ' reading those eyes... he didn't wat to.. but he could ' he really didn't have to make an effort they just spoke to him, their pain, their agony, their hurt.
She controlled her emotions, twisting her nose - humare beech jo bhi huwa it was mutual, yeh kashish.. I wanted u, u wanted me. It was all simple..
she moved away from him, like she was getting suffocated caught between him & the wall.
Geet - atleast that's how it all started. His eyes could bleed anytime, as she looked straight through him now. A piercing look main Maan thi hoon.. kanhi na kanhi ...i felt more.. her voice almost cracked when she said that. I think...no I know I began falling in love with u.
he looked away.. she brickly came in front of him.. don't u dare pretend u don't hear me.
Don't act as if u didn't know. I know u know. Because u were feeling the same thing.
Now his coldness say getting her the hold of situation better. She knew all the while how things where between them. But his coldness was enough!!!
Geet - dehko mujhe lagta hain u may have a good reason for why u don't want to accept ur feelings.. but all this wat his happening between us I can't handle it any more.. I can't fight myself & abort a fetus again. His heart stuck up in his mouth. I can't deal with my feelings & ur hang ups at the same time. They stood staring at each other for eternity. He finally dropped is head & nodded - I understand
he turned & walked away from the apartment closing the door. His driver opened the door holding an umbrella for him, but he didn't sit in .. probably he didn't even notice.. he just continued walking in the rain. He didn't know where he was heading to in that rainy night, drenching himself head to toe in the dublin streets. He had no plans, no idea, it felt blank.. he was thoughtless.. speechless.. like someone has switched everything off. his senses, his thoughts, everything around him.
He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk closed his eyes, extending his hands & tilted his face up towards the sky. Raindrops cool steady fell down on his face. Don't know why, why he was so hurt. Why he felt bad that she aborted their baby. Why he couldn't he take the pain in her eyes. Why the torturous expression on her face hurt him, like someone stabbed his heart.
He pushed his hair backward couple of times & wat was he thinking when he took Geet to his bed. It was just supposed be a kashish between them. He never wanted to hurt her. He winched at his own thought..when did he cared if his act hurt anyone. Why this guilt conscious now.
God damit.. it was just s** between them, nothing more, yes he had to accept he never felt anything like this before with any other women. The s** they had was phenomenal. In fact he can't even remember claiming any other women the way he did with her. He had never relished any other body as much he did hers. But s**... it was just s**..
he pushed his hair back again & his jaw tensed.. if that's wat he thought it was then wat was he doing walking in the rain in the middle of no where. Why was he walking aimlessly not knowing where he was, why he was so effected.. he closed his eyes & buried his face in his palm & fell on his knees.
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muskan
Edited by muskanp - 14 years ago
Anupamaa
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