I don't get it.....

funnymonkey thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#1
I understand that Harshita has a rough childhood, a step mom that dont loves her, a dad that ignores her and a spoiled brother...but i dont understand why everyone is saying help harishta and whatnot....she is one child who has a home and now a father who understands what he did wrong....

What about other kids in India that we see begging on the road....small kids carryig their sibilings on the road begging??? At that time no one comes and helps them but suddenly when we see something on tv suddenly everyone wants to help....

I dont understand what is the big deal...why dont everyone focus on how to hwlp those kids on the Road???

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Nishita123 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#2
Its not like people dont want to help them/other kids - its just that people saw the episode on TV and they felt that this kid needs help and people are stepping forward to do that / want to do something about her situation - whats wrong in that ???
Did anyone say that they wanna help just this kid and no one else ??? And how do you know people are not helping other kids already ??
Lets respect their feelings / ignore if you dont agree - rather than questioning them IMHO.
Edited by Nishita123 - 14 years ago
atria thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#3
Just because there are thousands of kids not being helped, that is not the reason for not helping even one kid....
Many of us live abroad and do not encounter the grinding poverty in India on a regular basis. Maybe we are not very pro-active, but at least some of us are linked to NGOs etc regarding education or healthcare of such kids as well, so please don't judge everyone without knowing.
Regarding Harshita's case-- like I said, people tend to react to things, instead of being pro-active. Since it was shown on TV, some people felt the need to do something. Even if they have never helped any other kid in their life, the fact that they want to help this one does not make them hypocrites. Helping even one person is a GOOD thing. The fact that others have not been helped should not be used to shame that effort.
naraine thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: atria

Just because there are thousands of kids not being helped, that is not the reason for not helping even one kid....
Many of us live abroad and do not encounter the grinding poverty in India on a regular basis. Maybe we are not very pro-active, but at least some of us are linked to NGOs etc regarding education or healthcare of such kids as well, so please don't judge everyone without knowing.
Regarding Harshita's case-- like I said, people tend to react to things, instead of being pro-active. Since it was shown on TV, some people felt the need to do something. Even if they have never helped any other kid in their life, the fact that they want to help this one does not make them hypocrites. Helping even one person is a GOOD thing. The fact that others have not been helped should not be used to shame that effort.


I also live abroad and work in the social/health care field with lots of children and can tell you NGO involvement isn't the perfect solution either. First step was what Vaishnavi did--draw attention to the problem to the parents themselves. The second step involves someone monitoring the situation--if she continues to be abused by the step-mom, then protective custody would be important or else, Raja Rancho has to be willing to leave his wife. I truly do feel that Raja did not realize his mistake before because he has grown up in a society where sons are treated like kings and girls are less important (I don't agree with this, but the reality is that 60-70% of Indian families believe this). I think Raja will pay better attention. The reason I say NGO involvement is that once sent to a foster family, there is no guarantee of a better future either. I have seen here, because foster families are paid to take kids in, that sometimes, they just do what they minimally need to do to keep them okay with the authorities. The emotional trauma a child goes through being put in a new surrounding away from its familiary is sometimes not addressed, leading to low self esteem, which can affect the child at school, and hence, their future. However, back to the point about saying that "others should not be shamed"--I think that was inappropriate--the IF member is not trying to shame the effort, but that this knee jerk reaction by everyone needs to be thought of carefully, otherwise, you can do more harm than good.
atria thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: naraine


I also live abroad and work in the social/health care field with lots of children and can tell you NGO involvement isn't the perfect solution either. First step was what Vaishnavi did--draw attention to the problem to the parents themselves. The second step involves someone monitoring the situation--if she continues to be abused by the step-mom, then protective custody would be important or else, Raja Rancho has to be willing to leave his wife. I truly do feel that Raja did not realize his mistake before because he has grown up in a society where sons are treated like kings and girls are less important (I don't agree with this, but the reality is that 60-70% of Indian families believe this). I think Raja will pay better attention. The reason I say NGO involvement is that once sent to a foster family, there is no guarantee of a better future either. I have seen here, because foster families are paid to take kids in, that sometimes, they just do what they minimally need to do to keep them okay with the authorities. The emotional trauma a child goes through being put in a new surrounding away from its familiary is sometimes not addressed, leading to low self esteem, which can affect the child at school, and hence, their future. However, back to the point about saying that "others should not be shamed"--I think that was inappropriate--the IF member is not trying to shame the effort, but that this knee jerk reaction by everyone needs to be thought of carefully, otherwise, you can do more harm than good.

The member said clearly that why are people not helping kids on the road and trying to help this kid instead. Sounds like shaming to me....
Regarding the actual method of help, that can of course be debated, but the TM did not raise that question. S/he did not say what if your help backfires, but clearly asked why are you bothered with this kid when there are other kids in other worse situations. That is a NOT a good attitude.
naraine thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: atria

The member said clearly that why are people not helping kids on the road and trying to help this kid instead. Sounds like shaming to me....
Regarding the actual method of help, that can of course be debated, but the TM did not raise that question. S/he did not say what if your help backfires, but clearly asked why are you bothered with this kid when there are other kids in other worse situations. That is a NOT a good attitude.


It's not shaming, it's an honest question. But I also think it's not appropriate of everyone to gang up on a person for asking a question. Afterall, a forum is to express opinions and agree or disagree respectfully, not emotionally.
atria thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: naraine


It's not shaming, it's an honest question. But I also think it's not appropriate of everyone to gang up on a person for asking a question. Afterall, a forum is to express opinions and agree or disagree respectfully, not emotionally.


I felt the tone was different, my opinion. The TM could have got his/her point across better, and my reaction may have been strong also. Anyway, three people have responded to the TM, two have disagreed, one has supported, hardly ganging up by everyone.
We can agree to disagree on this, otherwise we will keep going around in circles. šŸ˜›
Nishita123 thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#8

Originally posted by: atria


I felt the tone was different, my opinion. The TM could have got his/her point across better, and my reaction may have been strong also. Anyway, three people have responded to the TM, two have disagreed, one has supported, hardly ganging up by everyone.
We can agree to disagree on this, otherwise we will keep going around in circles. šŸ˜›

If more people disagree with someone that doesn't mean they are ganging up !! 😊
Edited by Nishita123 - 14 years ago
naraine thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#9

Originally posted by: atria


I felt the tone was different, my opinion. The TM could have got his/her point across better, and my reaction may have been strong also. Anyway, three people have responded to the TM, two have disagreed, one has supported, hardly ganging up by everyone.
We can agree to disagree on this, otherwise we will keep going around in circles. šŸ˜›


Sounds like a good deal--Agree to disagree!!!!! I actually see your point on tones. In electronic conversations, it's really open to interpretationšŸ˜›
.shona. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#10
i m sorry to say but thts the attitude why so many ppl dont bother to help or change this world. I am no saint, but its true some ppl dont bother to help one person cuz they think wat will happen to the other million people. One has to remember it always starts with one person. Even helping harshata will make a huge difference.

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