Part 33: Hazy
boundaries…
<Geet's
monologue>
Now I had
two men in my life…Maan and MK…My Maan…I don't where he is right now and
neither do I know how or when to get him back…
But MK…he
was here to stay…infact he was sitting right in front of me and crunching some
numbers…
I had no
idea who this guy was…
Geet…meet
Mr.Sadoo
Mr.Sadoo
meet Geet…
I had gotten
a glipse of him at the airport and in office…but things changed and Maan came
out...only for a little while…like the sunshine that I got on cold wintery NY
days…its unpredictable and no one knew how long it lasts…
<Maan's
monologue>
According to
her…I'm a split personality…Maan and MK…to me I was all the same…the one who
always puts her above anything else…
I wanted to
be a part of her life in every way…She cannot expect me to stand in the
sidelines and watch her struggle with every roadblock that comes her way…
But I was
not ready to give up this time. She has to decide who she needs...Maan or MK…If
she expects Maan Singh Khurana to be behind her, then she is wrong and if she
wants to get a real taste of me…I'm all for it…
Maan:"Geet…so
are the closing numbers ready?"
Geet:" Yes MK…I have already sent it to you…"
It was
already 10.00 AM…the meeting was over…but I wanted her to sit down and go
through the numbers with me
Geet:"Sorry
MK…I can't now…I will book another time on your calendar?"
Maan:" You
have a meeting now?"
Geet:" No…I
have scheduled this time for me to work on something…so I cant…"
She was
about to leave…
Maan:"
Geet…Main tumhara Director hoon…aur main decide karta hoon ki meeting katam ho
gaya hai ki nahi…"
Geet:" Aur
main…is company ka employee hoon…I can decide to walk out of the meeting once
the scheduled hour is over…"
She knew to
push my buttons alright…
Maan:"Nahin...tum
galat ho Geet…Main yeh baat bhi decide karta hoon ki tum is company ka employee
rahe sakte ho ki nahin…"
<Geet's
monologue>
He was
indeed right…he was two levels up…he belonged to the execs now…
Geet:"Aur
main bhi decide kar sakthi hoon ki mujhe is company mein rehna hain ki nahi…"
He was taken
back….
Maan:"
Accha…job chod ke jaana chahte ho…to jao…maine kahaan tumhe roka hai…"
Geet:"Jab…voh
time ayega toh…voh bhi karoongi…aapko kehne keliye koi zaroorat nahin..."
I left the
cabin….I went to my desk and sent him a meeting invite to meet after an hour
later…
I could have
done it right then and there…but Maan….I mean MK didn't deserve it…
I was
running around to different aisles…to get the numbers right before I met with
him…and that is when it all went down….the laptop slipped from my hand and the
LCD boke…
Babaji…ye
bhi abhi hona tha kya….
I raised a
ticket for my laptop to be fixed….and then went to his cabin to give him the
ticket number to approve the same.
Maan:"
Hmmm…I thought we still had 20 mts before we meet…"
He didn't
look at me…
Geet:"Nahin…I
broke my laptop screen…I have raised a ticket for it to be fixed…Here is the
number…it needs your approval…"
Maan:" Tumhe
kisi bhi cheez ki kohi kadar nahin….Jaante ho…until the laptop comes back to
you the company is paying you for nothing…aur kitna productivity loss hota hain…"
I didn't
want to respond to him…I just acknowledged and was about to walk away…
Maan:" I'm
not done yet…Main decide karta hoon ki tum kab is cabin se jaa sakte ho…"
He walked up
to me…and held me by my wrist and pulled me close…
He didn't
have to be that rude…and what is all this in office?
Geet:"
Chodiye mujhe…MK…."
I tried to
shake his grip off…and his grip was tightening…all the time he spent in gym was
coming in to picture now…
It seemed as
if my blood supply to my hand was being cut off…
Geet:"AAhhh…."
He let go of
my hand…For a minute there I thought I saw Maan….but MK was back…
Geet:" Ab is
company ka productivity loss nahin hota hain kya…jab aap aapka kaam chodke
yaahan tak aakar meri haath pakad the hain tho…"
He walked
away…
Geet:" Aap
to jaante haina…ki yeh HR violation hain…harassment bhi ho sakta hain…"
Maan:" Violation…accha…"
He came even
closer and put his hand around my waist and brought me closer to him…Yeh! Toh
had hai…Had it been any other day…I would lay there in his arms forever…I was
only thankful for the blinds that were closed…else I would just be office ka
taaza khabar…and his anger probably took advantage of the closed blinds as
well…He held me that way for a moment longer and let me go….
<Maan's
monologue> She was surprised…I didn't understand my actions either.I was mad
about the fact that she was telling me what was HR violation and harassment
were…She was affected by my actions…She couldn't face me…I never realized her
waist was no narrow…I could feel her every inch of the way…She smelled as if
she had bathed herself in a spicy oriental scent…My left hand was tempted to
rest in the small of her back…and that's when I couldn't make out if she was
upset or….How can that be? The question haunted me…I had to snap out of it…I
was giving away too much…
Maan:"Isse
kahte hain…HR violation...So you want to get back at me for this morning…Now
you want to get me fired…Toh! Dek lethey kain…kaun pehle bahaar jaa tha hain…"
<Geet's
monologue>
I had still not recovered from the closeness
to him…His scents lingered on me…
Geet:"You know what…it doesn't matter… main jitna bhi
aapke hisaab se kaam karne ke liye try karoongi..toh bhi aapke liye kam hi
padega…LCD toh sirf ek aur bahana hain aapko chillane ke liye…"
Maan:" Kaam teek
se karogi…tab na…Sometimes it's the wrong PPT, nahin to reports time pe
delivery nahin hota hain…yaah kuch na kuch toot jata hain…us din phone…aur aaj
LCD…"
Geet:"MK…."
He had done
it… It was beyond the point of no return…I couldn't take it anymore…It was time
for retaliation...
Geet:"Ok…let
me also see…aap aapka kaam kaise karte hain…? I will prove that you are a
normal human too…Main bhi peeche hatne waali nahin hoon..."
I didn't
want to stay there one minute…I stormed out…
I had
forgotten amidst all this that I had the next meeting with him in 10 mts…
I might as
well just camped out with him there…
I went back
to his cabin.
Geet:"
Toh…MK…mera paas Laptop nahin hain…do you still want to continue with the meeting?"
Maan:"Haan…you
sent it to me right…toh…we will use my laptop…"
One
laptop…toh mujhe uske paas baitna hain…Babaji…
I pulled a
chair to the same side he was seated and sat next to him…
I had never
sat that close to him in office…we have had our closer moments… but never in
office…we had sat face to face before…or sometimes he has sat behind me…but
never this close side by side… and I can never get used to being closed to
him…there was something about him that made me feel like it was the first time…
I wondered
what was in store for me…His cologne already had a hook on me and was slowly
pulling me closer to him…
He opened
the excel and started going through the numbers….
I missed
Maan…I waited for Maan to come out and surprise me…No more calls…No more
emails…No more coffee shop meetings…It had already been a week…Day by day the
anger scale was rising…I didn't know how to put an end to Mr.Sadoo…
I wanted to
gaze at him some more time…to see if Maan would show up…
He caught me
looking at him…
Maan:"
Geet…Yeh numbers yahan pe match kyon nahin ho raha hain…."
I continued
looking at him…It was a penance that he was trying to break…may be if I could
hold onto my gaze for one second longer…Maan will be there…
He came close
and held my arm…he shook me as if to wake me up…indeed I was dreaming because I
was expecting Maan to show up…
Maan:"Geet…mujhe
dekte rahogi…ya jawab dene ka iraada bhi hain…"
Geet:"
Huh!....ji…."
Maan:"
Kabhi…Kam pe bhi dyaan diya karo…Aur mujhe goorna band karo…"
I had to
snap out of it…I looked at the excel to see what he was asking for…I gave him
the explanation…
I struggled
the whole time to stay close and not help stare at him…
He was way
too occupied with work…I don't think I can ever keep him from getting his work
done…I wondered what he was made up…His restraint didn't falter.
<Maan's
monologue>
May be I
should have cancelled the meeting…I don't want her sitting so close to me…
What if I
make any mistakes?…She already thinks I'm harassing her…
She can
really push my temper…and I end up doing something I don't want to…
Does she
know how she makes me want to sell my soul to the devil just to have her?
Like how she made me pull her closer….Yes she
made me do it…Me…in the right senses would never…
She was so
close to me…She was trying to grab a pen from the other side…For a second I
felt her cheek touched mine…I wasn't sure…
<Geet's
monologue>
Dhust Dhanav….Sirf
apne aapke baare main soch te rahte hain….Aur yeh! Numbers…Pen…Haan vus taraf
hain…Babaji…Why is he so nervous? Is something wrong? He was almost about to
break into a sweat…
Iska blood
pressure to teek hain na…Or could it be…he couldn't handle being so close to
me? Vile thoughts were running in my head….Mr Maan Singh Khurana…toh aap
ladikiyon ko itne paas se handle nahin kar sakte? Ab pata chala aapka weakness…
I had a mental roar of a laughter…
We finished
our review…
Maan:"Geet…we
have to get this presented at my 4oclock.. block your calendar…The meeting is
at the 57th floor…"
Hmmm…I was
trying to hatch evil plans to sabtogae his meeting…MK toh teek hain…lekin Maan
ko bhi…
I wondered
how to bring him down…I wanted him to know …ki woh bagwaan nahin hain…
At 3.45 we
got on the elevator…It was office closing hours….we had to get in atleast 15
mts early to the elevator else we would end up running late as the elevator
keeps stopping at almost all floors…
It was
pretty crowded…We got in together…The crowd moved us around and I landed right
in front of him…and he was dangerously close…
Babaji….I couldn't
say anything else….
I was
melting with every breath of his on my nape…For a second…I wanted to turn
around and face him…for I was sure his anger will keep me from doing anything
stupid…why did I feel he knew what he was doing to me?
<Maan's
monologue>
There was no
doubt…she was affected by our closeness…I wanted time to stop and for us to
stay that way for eternity…but the next best thing to that was that I knew how
to attack her now.
We sat next
to each other in the meeting room…I wanted to move close…now that I knew what
to do…to my surprise she moved her chair closer to mine too…Ok…I' not backing
out either…
I connected
my Mac to the projector and we started reviewing numbers…I also started passing
the printouts….when she clutched my hand along with the paper…
I couldn't continue
what I was saying…I had to pause for a moment…and she let go of my hand… It
must have been a mistake…or was it intentional?
Everyone in
the room were looking at me to see if I was alright…Why I had stopped the
introduction….
She had a
sly smile on her face…Hmmm…so is that how she wants to move her coins?
<Geet's
monologue>
I got you
Mr..MK….
I was to
take over for the next part…I switched to the excel I had to share on his Mac…I
started explaining the logic behind the same….
He tried to
clutch my hand under the table….Babaji….I wanted to scream…that was the least
expected…
I couldn't say
anything further…
Josh:" Geet….Are
you ok….Do you want some water?"
Geet:" No…Josh…."
I couldn't remember
the next word I was supposed to say….looking at my nervousness he let go of my
hand….Yeh! to ab bahuth hogaya….
<Maan's
monologue>
I couldn't help….I
had to…I had a smile on my face….
Now it was
Q&A….the last part…I felt victorious…There were quite some questions…I
wanted to go one by one….
Maan:" So
the first one…We have a 2 million dip…"
Huh! ….She
had her hand on my upper knee…trying to stroke it gently….
What was she
trying to do…I had to break out of the nervousness she was causing me…I knew
exactly what I had to do….I somehow needed the strength to get up from the
chair…after a moment or two…I did and walked toward the white board and felt a
sigh of relief…
I acted as
if I wanted to point to the projected numbers as I answered the questions…Hopefully
that wasn't all that odd….and then…there was only one thing one my mind…I had
to get back to her…She cannot make me loose my face infront of all these people…
It was her turn…I prayed someone had a
question for her…and now I had to return the favor she so graciously bestowed upon
me..
<Geet's
monologue>
I felt I was
good at this….but he was even better….It was my turn and he retaliated as
expected…
But the
issue was that even though I expected it…I couldn't recover when his hand was
on my lower thigh...
I wanted to
run out of the room…I did when I finished my answer after quite bit of a pause…
I went to
the restroom…calmed myself…
We had been
crossing boundaries…I didn't know how to confront him about this…Should I just
let it go?
I went to my
desk grabbed my bag and satchel and left office…
He was there
in the elevator…He was leaving too…
On days I
needed him the most…he would never show up…and today I wanted him to stay away
from me and yet he was around me more often than not.
Ofcourse he
took the same subway…I managed two walk two steps ahead of him….It was cold…I
was freezing…I had forgotten my gloves…He must have noticed it…he removed his
gloves and gave it to me…I ignored it and walked even faster….We were at the
apartment already and not a word was spoken till then…
We took the
elevator together…There was awkwardness…I could sense it in him as well.
I was about
to get off my elevator, when he stopped me…He held me by my wrist and closed
the elevator door….
He didn't let
me go…and I was trying to get his hands off my wrist…
We got off
at his floor…which was the next…and he dragged me to his apartment…
He let go of
my hand once we were inside…and closed the door behind us…
It seemed
like Nakul was not home….
Geet:" Yeh! Sab
kya hain Maan…I mean MK…"
Maan:" Geet…bahuth
hoga ya hai….Tum decide kar lo…I can't take this nonsense anymore…"
He walked to
get a glass of water….
I waited for
him to get back at me…
I was tired…I
sat down on the couch and put my feet up…I didn't feel strange doing so…I
wanted to rest my head and neck…I leaned back to be a bit more comfortable…It
was pitch dark outside and the stars were already peeping out from the heavens…
His
apartment was my very own planetarium…All I had to do was look up and his open
place was my gateway to the stars…I had gotten used to it when I was staying
over from time to time when Maan was down with Mono.
<Maan's
monologue>
This had to
stop…It felt like some lines in the sand had been erased…but the boundaries
were not clear now…I contemplated on how to start the conversation with her….
As I was
removing my tie…I walked towards the couch….Her eyes were closed…She seemed to
have fallen asleep…It must have been the nerves…Seeing her like that… my anger vaporized
…
I didn't want
to wake her up…I sat down on the the couch next to her…unbottoning my shirt…not
sure if I should make her comfotable on the bed…I sat there watching her…
There was an
air of innocence about her…
Clearly some
chains were broken today…How much farther we had come…I wasn't sure…The day's
proceedings were proof that we clearly affected by one another…
Maan:"Aur
kitna intezaar karna padega Geet….paas ho kar bhi yeh dooriyan kyon? "
I dared to
say that aloud…for I was partially sure she was asleep…my heart felt heavy….
I wanst sure
I was ready to play this game with her…I waited for the day when we wouldn't have
this distance between us….
Hours passed…for
it only seemed moments when we were together…
I looked at
the clock…it was 10.45 PM…I must have fallen asleep too….I was about to move…when
I realized I was leaning on her head…and she was resting on my shoulder...Her
hands were around my waist…and I was clutching her arms… Destiny must really have
a funny bone in it…We started of the day by fighting like a cat and dog and now
we had wound up in each others arms…
I wasn't sure
if I would wake her up with my movements…I was torn between wanting to get up
and wanting to stay that way…probably forever…
<Geet's
monologue>
How did I
fall asleep on the couch? I couldn't check the time properly…It was 2.23 AM…No…I'm
not…I was on Maan's bed…I woke up quickly….He was nowhere to be found…I was
properly tucked in…He must have carried me to the bed…I tried to picture it in
my mind…and wished I could have stayed awake to take it all in.
I got out of
bed to see where he was….He was sleeping on the couch…Was he comfortable? I
watched him from standing behind the couch….time passed by…I could have been
easily standing there for whole of half hour…I was tempted to push back his
hair on his forehead…but I saved it for another day…I went back to bed…I pulled
the sheets close to me and tried to catch a whiff of him on the comforter…
Perhaps our
confrontation was not meant to happen today…I sighed…
I wished I
knew the answer to my questions…for my heart ached at that moment…for being so
close yet so far…
Hopefully...they will be able to deal with their boundaries soon...Please post and discuss...I get so excited when I'm not the only one writing long posts on this thread. Thanks to everyone who comments on the FF...
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