Discussion: Marriage of equals

I know you all are probably going to think I am mean, but I think this show, more than anything, emphasizes the importance of marriage of equals. I am in the US, and after seeing the episode where Saloni cannot open a bottle of champagne, it just shows that it is not about just a class problem- it is abiout the values that each class carries. And when people have to start adjusting, then it means compromising, and compromising leads to loss of identity- it's even statistically proven that marriage of people with similar backgrounds and attitudes are more successful than those who come from different backgrounds and have extremely varied traits (contrary to the opposites attract and complete each other theory). What do you guys think? 😊

BTW, Love Nahar and Saloni 🤗

I also agree and Nahar should have helped Saloni with the bottle opening.

i have to diagree on this one because i have married a person who is totally different from me. he grew up in canada, more westernised, do not know abcd about india, don't watch indian movies(can't understand hindi). me totally opposite to him grew up in india, more conservative, watch lots of indian movies, shows.

this all does not mean i lose my identity. no we love each other even though we are so different. i do what ever i feel like doing. i think the true relationship is what gives you independence and not bind you or make you change. i don't like ice hockey doesn't mean i will not let him watch it either.

and even if you are so alike there has to be some differences in your personality otherwise it will be so boring. we have been married 8 years now and are very happy. now that we are parents of two beautiful kids we have to make compromises with them. why not its unconditional love we both have for both of them.

Yeah... I agree with ishan2000. A marriage between 2 people with differing interests sometimes is better. Not that I am saying that a marriage of different backgrounds and interests will necessarily work - there is simply most of the time less of a chance for compromise, change confusion. If 2 people are different - there will obviously be a certain degree of compromise - isn't that what life and marriage is about? I dont think that compromise always means letting go of your identity or your goals - to a larger extent it means more a meeting of minds - stretching beyond your own capabilities and own interests to blend with someone else's. If 2 people aren't prepared to compromise - ther is never going to be any common ground. There will always be differences and even possibly animosity.
Just my opinion people... I'm lucky, i think in the sense that I've fallen in love with someone with a very similiar background, not necessarily materially, more so regarding cultural and social ethics, attitudes and behaviourisms. In this country it is very difficult to find some1 similiar to you in this sense, however there are still compromises that are needed to be made with regards to daily life...

Some common interests are needed in marriage but one need not change themselves completely for their spouse. So what if Saloni can't open a bottle of champaigne? Nothing wrong with not drinking! I don't drink at all and am proud of it! I was extremely happy when Nahar says "You don't change yourself for me.. Maintain your Astitva" - I felt like applauding him! Both need to accept each other as is.. Nice that Saloni is trying to learn new things but so what if she does not want to drink -nothing wrong with that! Similarly Nahar needs to learn a few things to please Saloni as well...

I totally agree with marriage should be between two pepole coming from similar background i mean socially as well as intelectualy. It hurts too much to have a totally different partner and not willing to compromise in any way. Our cultureaas well as many social pressures prevents one not to think in terms of divorce and have to drag life with so many regrets.

Originally posted by: ramas

I totally agree with marriage should be between two pepole coming from similar background i mean socially as well as intelectualy. It hurts too much to have a totally different partner and not willing to compromise in any way. Our cultureaas well as many social pressures prevents one not to think in terms of divorce and have to drag life with so many regrets.

Oh God ... I can go on and on - on this topic. I completely agree that Caste/Religion/Sect are different but class and a certain social upbringing are completely different matters. I won't say financial because I have seen (and am friends with) many who come from a financially poor background but due to their own education and friends have molded themselves according to a certain "culture/class" pattern - for good for for worse 😛

Which is why I deplore the storylines of so many Indian movies which glorify a fantastical image of 2 people (typically rich versus poor) falling in love and living happily ever after... but from personal experience... this leads to strife ...more often than not.

Again I stress... am not talking small adjustments like hobbies, lifestyle or personality traits.

Am talking diverse cultural backgrounds. These differences create bigger problems than even religion or caste or financial backgrounds !!

I think the marriage btwn Nahar and Saloni is a work in progress. Yes, they are different but in their differences they are bridging 2 wrlds together. I think they have a good marriage. 👏

This is a fantastic topic, so I am moving it to the debate mansion as well.