babygirl.xo thumbnail
Posted: 16 years ago
#1
hello everyone i am very very confused. i met this girl inder in grade 8 and me and her became best friends. we were always seen together in middle school. and for high school we both picked the same courses so we cud be in the same classes. when summer break started we were very sad cuz we wudnt be able to see eachother that much. buh we talked to eachother on the phone and on msn everyday. we wud get very exicted when we talked to eachother. then high school started and we had 2 classes togehter each semester. there were 4 classses each semester buh we only had 2 together. in high school we were seen together all the time. everyone called us sisters. we loved eachother so much. we sat together in all the classes. the teacher wud often move us buh we still sat together. and then we started to skip school because we hated school. we went to school probably 3 days a week. and we always skipped the classes taht we didnt have together. both of our marks were going down and our parents werent happy with eachother. and then in the second semester things changed. in the second semester inder was getting beat up by her reltives just because she was not getting good grades. she didnt live wid her parents cuz her parents wur in india. and she lived wid her bua's family. so she wud constantly get beat up and i didnt like that at all. so few days later her bua's family went to india. and inder stayed behind with her grandma. her grandma didnt beat her up at all. buh her grandma wud get mad at her. so inder got a job at a resturant and there she met a boy who she really liked. and inder and taht boy started going out. buh that guy was not a gud boy. he already had a gf buh he kept telling inder taht hes only wid her for his family cuz his family. that boy;s name was sam. so sam wasnt leaving his other gf cuz both of the families knew abt their realtionship. so inder still went out wid him. cuz she loved sam a lot.
so inder and sam wud meet everyday. and sam wud come infront of inder's house to hang out. and her grandma was not happy. and she blamed everything on me. she thought that it was all because of me. and then inder started getting beat up by her grandma again. and here i was getting beat up cuz me and inder were very very close. and my parents didnt like the fact that i loved inder a lot and we were like sisters.
so inder got fed up and she called the cops and she wuz placed in a foster home. and three days later i wus also placed in a foster home.
and inder and sam stopped seeing eachother. and eventully they broke up. so me and inder had so much freedom cuz we werent wid out families. we hung out every day. my foster family knew that me and inder were very close and she let me and inder have sleepovers every 3 days a week. and then inder had this other friend who didnt like me and as days went by inder and that girl kept coming close. and inder wud get mad at me for little things. me and inder kept having fights over little things. and inder became very abusive. well her anger wuz uncontrollable. she even had to get anger management classes.
and i went back to my family cuz things got sorted out. and inder stayed at the foster home. and one day she got really mad at me and hit me in pe class and after that we wur not friends anymore.
then came the summer break and we were goin into grade 10 and inder called my house so many times cuz she wanted to beat me up. and i knew this cop and she told me taht inder has gotten in troble so many times.
her reputation in my school was very down.
she hated me. she wud start rumours about me. and when school started it was uncomfortable for me to face inder. buh after few months she got kicked out of the school. and i made new friends. and i still talk to my foster family. so now the school is over. we're on summer break. and my new bff told me taht inder made a comment on my and my friendd's pic on myspace. and she wrote that she missed me a lot. and she is sorry for everything. and today i got an text msg from my friend sayin that inder wants to work things out wid me and also said how much she loves me and she wunt do the old things again.
i dont know what to do. my foster family saw how close me and inder were and how we cudnt stay without eacohter.
i miss her too. i still love her buh my school memebers are happy tha i am not wid inder anymore cuz of the way she ttreated. and yesterday i wuz goin thru sum old stuff and say all the notes that inder wrote me and all teh notes had hearts on em. well i havent talked to inder yet i made a fake e-mail adress wher me and inder wud talk i am waiting for her to come online.
and one thing is taht my parents wud never want me to be her friend again.
what should i do?
thanks a lot
ps: i am soo sorry that you have to read that much.
help!

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Princess.. thumbnail
17th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Networker 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 16 years ago
#2
okay so u say u want to be her friend but at the same time ur positive with the fact that ur school members are happy with u, inder excluded.
Its kind of complicated.
I say, you be friends with her but not to close, of course not at the same state u guys were before.
Be friends with her, talk to her politely but don't be like sisters again.
Be like just an OKAY-OKAY friend to her.
With this, u would b able to be friends with her n ur other frnds/family won't be annoyed at all..
Moreover, if she does the same abusing thing again, by being an okay-okay friend, u won't feel bad either.
Hope that helps
Take care!
Love,
Nimisha

bewafa thumbnail
19th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail Commentator Level 1 Thumbnail
Posted: 16 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: Princess..

okay so u say u want to be her friend but at the same time ur positive with the fact that ur school members are happy with u, inder excluded.
Its kind of complicated.
I say, you be friends with her but not to close, of course not at the same state u guys were before.
Be friends with her, talk to her politely but don't be like sisters again.
Be like just an OKAY-OKAY friend to her.
With this, u would b able to be friends with her n ur other frnds/family won't be annoyed at all..
Moreover, if she does the same abusing thing again, by being an okay-okay friend, u won't feel bad either.
Hope that helps
Take care!
Love,
Nimisha

Yeh that is sound advice.
Ofcourse she was undergoing a lot of emotional stress, and sometimes we take it out on those closest to us. One should always give a second chance, but just to get one person back in your life, you cannot lt go of the new and old people stll in your life.
So it's easier, if you just stick to being an ok ok friend. but why bother settin a whole email addy just to talk to her? if shes just goin to be an ok ok friend, just keep her on ur normal list. and if ur friends are against it, just tell them that shes not going to affect you that much.
Coz dude, you ended up in a foster home...which did have a bit of her influence.
You meet ppl along the way, and you grow distant along the way...when one goes, another one takes the place...coz watever hapens, happens for the best. :D

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