quit my job/break-up e-mail -LMAO

Originally posted by: Jess.

LOL
this is funny

i clicked on random things and this is the letter

Dear GUY,

I'm writing you this email because I think our relationship has run its course. Do you realize that you're a total loser? You couldn't even pass your exams without cheating; I should have known you'd cheat on me too, asshole. It might be hard for you to believe, but one thing I can tell you for sure: you really need to work on your skills in bed. I mean, you're just plain bad at sex. Doing drugs so much really got in the way of more important things. You need to clean yourself up. Here's some food for thought: you're an asshole!

I'm not a puppet, you can't just control me by pulling on a string, so why do you try to control everything I do? I need my freedom, and there's nothing you can do about it.

Sorry, but you're not even worth keeping as a friend. Give me back my keys, I don't want you coming around here anymore. It may be a typical line, but it's true: we just aren't meant for each other. I may love you, but I'm definitely not in love with you. You're gonna have to learn to accept that. I'm not sure whether we can see each other again in the future but, for now at least, I definitely need my own space. I think you get the idea: this relationship is over.

Enjoy yourself!

Originally posted by: xmanisha

HAHA, here's my breakup email xD

Dear you,

I'm writing you this email because I think our relationship has run its course. I can't believe how selfish you are. Relationships are supposed to be about sharing, jerk. I know you'll probably tell everyone that you dumped me, because you're a liar. But everyone knows that already, so they won't believe you. I can't believe you forgot my birthday! Who does that?

Why do you spend so little money on me? Buying me a happy meal at McDonald's does not count as taking me out to dinner. If you ever get engaged, just remember that an onion ring is not a valid replacement for a wedding ring. Sometimes you need to take things a bit slower, and just have fun. Unfortunately, this relationship is becoming too serious for my tastes. And as if that wasn't enough, you have to criticize me all the time! Now it's my turn to be the critic. I give you one thumb up: stick it up your ass! You don't live in a soap opera, so quit causing so much drama.

Sorry, but you're not even worth keeping as a friend. You may not have realized, but I saw you with her, you greasy-heeled anus-sniffer! I never want to see you again, jerkface! Stay away from me or I'll beat you with a frozen salmon. I think you get the idea: this relationship is over.

Get lost loser!
Manisha