The 'change' in Maa-saa : Your take

So we've heard Badi Maasiji [ for future reference , BM , I cant type Badi Maasiji over and over again : P ] say this many a time , that Maa-saa/ KALLO [🤣] wasnt always like this , that she was soft out and out earlier , and now she's sort of erected defensive walls around herself . Hmm . IMO , BM has a point . We've all seen Kallo's softer side : the time when Bhairav apologised to her and laid his head in her lap after he burst out in defence of Anandi , the way she comforted Bhairav when Pratap's people were readying to leave with his body for the cremation and how she held Sumitra when S was crying with her head on Bhagwati's lap . So I guess , we've seen this softer side of her in times of crises , whether it be as a mother / grandmother and to a VERY limited extent , as a MIL .

But most of the time , her demeanour is the exact opposite , she's always angry and hard-to-please and taunting usually .... mostly in the way she treats her daughters in law and her grand-daughter in law .But acc. to BM , she wasnt always like this . So coming to the point , what happened , according to you , in Kalyani's married life , that she changed ? At least , in her 'external' behaviour ? Or rather , why does she behave so...severely with the women of her household ? Badi Jiji is the exact opp. in her treatment of Sumitra/Gehna/Anandi .... for example ,while Kallo will taunt S about not taking care of Gehna , BM will remind Kallo that S has already prepared halwa . So the chances of this behaviour having its root in their childhood are slim, implying that whatever change happened , happened in Kallo's life after her wedding .

I think , maybe , she was treated in this same severe manner by HER MIL and possibly , Grandmom-in-la too .... 'cause I remember she once told Anandi that her GMIL had made her stand in the heat for hours on end as a punishment for something ..... so possibly , having been suppressed by HER in laws , she behaves in the same way with her sons' and grandson's wives ? Maybe 'cause that's the only treatment she knows ? Your take ?

i agree wid u dear...u hve written all tat leaves me noth 2 say...she must hve been severley illtreated by her inlaws 2 n she wedded at a very young age smewhere around 6 or 7wen she said in sme epsde.... so she bcme stern ,strict ...the taunting is usually passed down by herinlaws as she must hve undergone through all tis.. n her softer side has been shown in many epsdes...i remmber 1 scene wen durg sugnas gauna wen dadisa gives her dress 2 sugna(the weddg dress) if u remmber...the convo between them was very emotional...wen sugna ask her how did grandpa say aftr wearg tat dress n dadisa replies he wasnt thre 2 see it....she nvr wored it...tat kinda touched my heart.........she mite hve learnt the hard way....thhe problems,situations,upbringing n taunts she must hve gne through must hve made her like tis!

Originally posted by: mehraan

i agree wid u dear...u hve written all tat leaves me noth 2 say...she must hve been severley illtreated by her inlaws 2 n she wedded at a very young age smewhere around 6 or 7wen she said in sme epsde.... so she bcme stern ,strict ...the taunting is usually passed down by herinlaws as she must hve undergone through all tis.. n her softer side has been shown in many epsdes...i remmber 1 scene wen durg sugnas gauna wen dadisa gives her dress 2 sugna(the weddg dress) if u remmber...the convo between them was very emotional...wen sugna ask her how did grandpa say aftr wearg tat dress n dadisa replies he wasnt thre 2 see it....she nvr wored it...tat kinda touched my heart.........she mite hve learnt the hard way....thhe problems,situations,upbringing n taunts she must hve gne through must hve made her like tis!

Oh yes , I remember that scene ..... it was one of the most touching scenes in BV for sure .... I remember I was very happy after watching that episode because I always wanted to know more about Kalyani as a wife/daughter/daughter-in-law , because its mostly her aspects as a mother/MIL/GMIL that are shown , but not the older relationships , so to speak . I remember she told Anandi or Sumitra that she had been married by the time she was 6 and another time , she'd mentioned the standing-in-the-heat incident but that was it , at least , till the convo with Sugna about that dress ..... if she was married at 6 , stands to reason that her behaviour , thinking , attitude etc were moulded in her sasuraal only , nowhere else . I just wish they would explore some of her past and show her memories as a wife and daughter-in-law .

Originally posted by: CeruleanSky

Oh yes , I remember that scene ..... it was one of the most touching scenes in BV for sure .... I remember I was very happy after watching that episode because I always wanted to know more about Kalyani as a wife/daughter/daughter-in-law , because its mostly her aspects as a mother/MIL/GMIL that are shown , but not the older relationships , so to speak . I remember she told Anandi or Sumitra that she had been married by the time she was 6 and another time , she'd mentioned the standing-in-the-heat incident but that was it , at least , till the convo with Sugna about that dress ..... if she was married at 6 , stands to reason that her behaviour , thinking , attitude etc were moulded in her sasuraal only , nowhere else . I just wish they would explore some of her past and show her memories as a wife and daughter-in-law .

yes dear...tats wat i meant..i wud luv 2 c her past 2...i hope BADIMASIU throws light on tis....6 is such a small age...very tender .....at tis age a child is very inquisitive ..definately her thoughts,actions must hve been moulded by her inlaws!

Both of you have said it all and I completely agree with everything mentioned. 😊

Maybe if she would have married a bit later than 6, like anandi/sugna, she might have understood situations a little bit & instead of treating her DILs and GDILs the way she was, she might have treated them better since she would have understood that being treated this way is not the right way of handling the person. But since she was married at age 6, you learn as you see and understand, that this was the only way out or solution & this custom/tradition has to be in that particular way. 😊

Cheers,
Sapna