Abhimanyu - The father - Page 3

I understand many of your points. I may not agree with all of them but as you said let's agree to disagree.

First of all i really like the way you put forward.

About this thing Abhi disregarding ruhi- you are right at the moment focus is somewhere else but this is also a way of disregarding her. Here we are talking about a man who took a decision to marry someone for a zid of that child. Now same man have no time to pick her call.

First they get Ruhi addicted to the fact that poppy toh uske aage peeche hain now he is nowhere to be seen. That's no good.

I also believe or wanted that under normal circumstances Abhi would be the loving strick dad and Ak the mischievous one but here we are and in this universe Abhi isn't a better parent atleast at the moment.

Undermining authority be it with Aruhi infront of Ruhi

And now here Navra infront of Abhir. He tried that before too when he wasn't aware but Akshu shut him up so he couldn't.

His parenting way so far doesn't include explaining stuff. Whereas when Abhir wanted a room for himself and got angry with Abhinav. Akshu explained it too him.

The biggest point is Abhi doesn't have gratitude, his anger is above all and currently from what i see he looks more obsessed with the fact that mera beta than anything else.

He treats Abhir as an object he's entitled to. So no.

Originally posted by: chaipaani

I understand many of your points. I may not agree with all of them but as you said let's agree to disagree.

First of all i really like the way you put forward.

About this thing Abhi disregarding ruhi- you are right at the moment focus is somewhere else but this is also a way of disregarding her. Here we are talking about a man who took a decision to marry someone for a zid of that child. Now same man have no time to pick her call.

First they get Ruhi addicted to the fact that poppy toh uske aage peeche hain now he is nowhere to be seen. That's no good.

I also believe or wanted that under normal circumstances Abhi would be the loving strick dad and Ak the mischievous one but here we are and in this universe Abhi isn't a better parent atleast at the moment.

Undermining authority be it with Aruhi infront of Ruhi

And now here Navra infront of Abhir. He tried that before too when he wasn't aware but Akshu shut him up so he couldn't.

His parenting way so far doesn't include explaining stuff. Whereas when Abhir wanted a room for himself and got angry with Abhinav. Akshu explained it too him.

The biggest point is Abhi doesn't have gratitude, his anger is above all and currently from what i see he looks more obsessed with the fact that mera beta than anything else.

I agree with most of your points. He is pretty deluded in anger right now, but I am hoping to see some evolution as time passes. It's also hard because of the pacing of the show. We have been technically discussing things that happened within a span of a day or two. It's impossible for a real person to even accept the magnitude of this news in a day or two. Here Abhi is already going into battle mode.

Anyways, thank you for your post.

Originally posted by: lagjagale

I think we have yet to see what kind of father he is. The whole issue here is more the pacing of the show and their sudden changes in script based on trp. Ruhi was always Abhi's guilt first and child second. He never really "parented" her cause he was always trying to make her happy. What we saw initially with his intense attachment to Ruhi was more like she was his only lifeline in the darkness without Ak. Then Ak came back into his life, and suddenly bulb switched on. He was blinded, and he ran blindly after Ak, and she turned him down and threw him into another pit of guilt. So then again, he returned to his lifeline.

As to Abhir, they would have shown more attachment if the story was only focused on Abhira. But they wanted to show Nav stuff and everything, and it really wouldn't have made sense for Abhi to feel so strongly about Abhir from Kasauli trip onwards. He would have found out pretty quickly if he felt so strongly about him. Moreover, I think the way he felt for Ak overshadowed his feelings for Abhir. That's shown to happen for both of them, honestly, only Nav keeps Abhir above all else.

In terms of parenting, I think Abhi might be better than Ak for Abhir. I have alluded to this before, but Abhir is shown to be a lot like Abhi. He is honest and straightforward and really doesn't understand all the twists and turns of lies his mother weaves. He feels more comfortable with Abhi as well because Abhi is straightforward and honest. And Ak isn't even herself in all the time she raised Abhir, just an angry and scared version. She gives him pretty conflicting messages too, depending on the way she is feeling. All over Abhi might turn out to be a better parent if he can actually learn to prioritize and control his temper.

Wow …I loved your post…brilliantly put!! You should replace the honcho of creatives team right now…they need clarity and you will provide that…bravo!!

Originally posted by: Deltablues

He treats Abhir as an object he's entitled to. So no.

PLEASE WATCH THIS

this is why people defend psycho doctor

https://youtu.be/Zpwbyrpzi4Y

Originally posted by: solembaum

The biggest example of her empathy is that no one even in her current life who has seen at least part of her trauma thinks badly of Abhimanyu or Gorillas .. this is not because they are themselves so great but because Akshara chose not to paint them as villains ., even when she told Muskaan she said don’t judge them through my experiences , build your relationship .. even with her limited means she does charity at church, she takes care of Muskaan , neelamma , she is a contributing member of the small community around them .. yes she is pucca about accounts, the disciplinarian in the house .. but where did you see lack of empathy .. even when Abhimanyu came to Kasauli she didn’t treat him badly .. nor did she forbid the child from meeting Abhimanyu .. you are choosing to see her being strict as having a lack of empathy .. it is not like she is going around riding roughshod on all people around her except Nav.. they have family time under the stars , she makes her son understand when he is throwing tantrums .. she just doesn’t give in and pamper like Abhimanyu .. of course her fear of what Sbhimanyu and his involvement in her life can do is there and she hasn’t told the child about Abhimanyu because he is too young and she doesn’t want to poison the child .. she might not be happy with the sudden divman thing .. but some mistakes all parents make . She still even before Abhimanyu again started showing his true colors never forbid the child from meeting or making a relation even if it wasn’t something she was happy about .. and I am saying about Abhimanyu based on all his interactions .. whether it is anyone he has loved .. before Abhira there is a scene where Nishta has not done her homework or project abd she says she knows Abhimanyu will do it for her .. take Neel - he never tried to have a conversation about his career or insecurities .. nothing and his way of going about Neel - Arohi was all wrong .. he does the same thing with Ruhi and now with Abhir .. doing everything they ask for .. and he is also sort of trying to make himself into this extra parental authority who is teaching the child that GE can come to him for things his parents say no to .. anyway you like Abhimanyu so you won’t see these as faults .. but I see Akshara S a good mother ..who is balanced in the way she has brought up the child .. she plays with him, tells him stories , scolds him or restricts him when she thinks he is wrong .. true she doesn’t want her child to face the kind of things she did .. so she is teaching him to fight as well .. but she is also teaching him to say sorry when he is wrong , when his behaviour is unacceptable ,.. I haven’t seen her teaching him to be unkind or to lie .. I haven’t seen her being unkind to people in front of him or even when he is not around .. and she is the only character who has not played victim and blamed others for her problems ..she has not self pitied saying why me , she never blamed gorillas or Arohi or even abhimanyu for what happened to her .. she is angry with Snhimsnyu and does not think that well of him,, but she still does not hold grudges that he is good with everyone else and her family is so pro him .. she just makes the best of what life has thrown at her without blaming other people for it or without using sympathy card with anyone ..she could easily poison the child against dicman too .. and she would have good reasons .. Manjari did it slyly all her life .. but she is not doing that .. I would say she still has enough and more empathy and kindness than the rest of gorillas and Abhimanyu combined

I agree that Abhi hated Harsh because of his behavior towards his mother, and I have full suspicion that if Ak had stayed after white day/gone back, that is what would have happened. Abhi, Manjari would have never forgiven her and treated her like shit while emotionally manipulating her to stay with them for Abhir's sake. But.....

Abhi is not even close to being Harsh, nor would he ever be that person. Harsh wasn't just awful and abusive towards Manjari, he was like that with everyone. He never loved Manjari, or if he did, there is some past we don't know about. Abhi loved Ak, he took care of her and was never abusive towards her on a day-to-day basis. His Achilles heel is his temper, and he destroyed not just Ak's life but his as well on the white day. Most importantly, he has grown up watching his father treat his mother wrong, and he would never do that to Ak. If he felt like things were going in that direction, he would back off and divorce Ak and try to do joint custody of Abhir. It's not so simple to trivialize his trauma, but I guess the writers are going to do it anyways. They are going to show Abhi that he is exactly like the person he hated, which is just awesome, except he isn't, and he doesn't deserve that. I predict it will be a huge confrontation with Ak, where she will say that to mirror him saying stuff about seerat ma, so both of them will throw each other's trauma in their faces.

Originally posted by: lagjagale

I agree that Abhi hated Harsh because of his behavior towards his mother, and I have full suspicion that if Ak had stayed after white day/gone back, that is what would have happened. Abhi, Manjari would have never forgiven her and treated her like shit while emotionally manipulating her to stay with them for Abhir's sake. But.....

Abhi is not even close to being Harsh, nor would he ever be that person. Harsh wasn't just awful and abusive towards Manjari, he was like that with everyone. He never loved Manjari, or if he did, there is some past we don't know about. Abhi loved Ak, he took care of her and was never abusive towards her on a day-to-day basis. His Achilles heel is his temper, and he destroyed not just Ak's life but his as well on the white day. Most importantly, he has grown up watching his father treat his mother wrong, and he would never do that to Ak. If he felt like things were going in that direction, he would back off and divorce Ak and try to do joint custody of Abhir. It's not so simple to trivialize his trauma, but I guess the writers are going to do it anyways. They are going to show Abhi that he is exactly like the person he hated, which is just awesome, except he isn't, and he doesn't deserve that. I predict it will be a huge confrontation with Ak, where she will say that to mirror him saying stuff about seerat ma, so both of them will throw each other's trauma in their faces.