Distorted Lives..FOUW..Thread 2..... updtd note pg 105 - Page 71

Take care of urself and family

Hi Aditi

Hope you are feeling better

Hi Aditi

hope you are feeling better now

take care

be strong

read all parts in a go n it was amazing...loved how every equation is desrcribed...please do cont soon

NOTE

Hello everyone, It's been a long time. I am sorry but after my uncle passed I had been so overwhelmed with everything happening that I just couldn't write. My depression which is mostly in remission was also acting up. Now I have started writing again and will be posting an update perhaps within a day. Thank you for all your well wishes and I am really sorry for not responding sooner.

Aditi

hey hope you doing goodnow

really eagerly waiting for update

Originally posted by: aditi_2010

NOTE

Hello everyone, It's been a long time. I am sorry but after my uncle passed I had been so overwhelmed with everything happening that I just couldn't write. My depression which is mostly in remission was also acting up. Now I have started writing again and will be posting an update perhaps within a day. Thank you for all your well wishes and I am really sorry for not responding sooner.

Aditi

Hi Aditi

how are you? Thanks for the note

no need to apologise

update when you are able to

take care

Originally posted by: aditi_2010

NOTE

Hello everyone, It's been a long time. I am sorry but after my uncle passed I had been so overwhelmed with everything happening that I just couldn't write. My depression which is mostly in remission was also acting up. Now I have started writing again and will be posting an update perhaps within a day. Thank you for all your well wishes and I am really sorry for not responding sooner.

Aditi

thanks for note

every thing is right when you are healthy

Thanks for your note

will be waiting for an update

when you are ready

Thank you everyone for such overwhelming response. Before I start I would just say this is not just an ordinary story. Neither Maan nor Geet are perfect people here. they are both imperfect and here's a story of few people who are no where near perfects. This is the story of their flaws...their imperfections...their incompleteness. Do comment and press like. They inspire me to write better. In case anyone wants pm please add me as buddy. Awaiting your honest opinions.

Please stay safe everyone. Let's do everything that is in our power to help people who need it in these turbulent times. Take care everyone.

I am doing much better now. Thank you for waiting and for all your well wishes. I have read every comment even if I am right now unable to reply them individually.

Part 56

OH How the tables have turned!

Maan was busy checking the status report for Darjeeling project. Everything was good and Annie was doing a fabulous job. But old habits die hard. He couldn’t resist checking in now and then. He raised his head at the knock and noted the time. Rey was supposed to come and discuss the new deal. Maan asked him to come in.

“Wow Rey! Am impressed. My brother has finally learnt punctuality!”

“Don’t sound so surprised Maan…At some point in life I had to grow up na?”

They got busy talking about the pros and cons of the new deal. Once they finished discussing Maan couldn’t help but feel proud of Rey.

“I am impressed Rey! You have done a great job with the market research and if your projected profits could be realized then Khurana enterprise will achieve a new milestone.”

“This is not done Maan I did such a good job and such a rukha sukha well done?”

Maan shook his head. Somehow he was glad his playful brother wasn’t totally lost beneath this new responsible Rehaan.

“Stop pouting! What do you want?”

“I don’t know. Hey, maybe we can have a nice party.”

“You know I hate parties Rey?”

“It will be more of an informal get together really. We can get Brij and Arjun to come. Annie will want Vicky there. Let’s also get Pari, Geet, Sam and Muski to come as well. “

“Am listening. Go on.”

“Let’s plan for this weekend. No servants or anything fancy. We will all pitch in and help you cook. It will be all of us just chilling out and getting to know each other.”

“Will not inviting Arjun and Sam complicate things?”

“Someday soon Annie would have to face Arjun. He is one of your best friend Maan and a family friend. It’s better that the first meeting be in a casual environment surrounded by people who wont judge.”

“Fair point. And Sam?”

“What about Sam?

“What about her? You guys are divorced for over a year. It’s not like you are cheating on her with Geet. You are not capable of that. Yeah it would be a bit awkward. She would figure out that you are in love but she is a big girl and will handle things with maturity.”

Rehaan had no idea how hard his statement hit Maan. Maan had never been proud of his night with Geet. He had always known he was in the wrong but times like this always brought the issue ahead.

“Hey Maan, are you even listening!”

Maan looked up. Rehaan had continued talking but Maan hadn’t been paying attention.

“Are you okay Maan? You look tired. Hey Man, if you need this weekend to rest up just say so. I was just kidding you know? Your words are enough.”

Maan smiled. This was another proof that Rehaan was finally growing up. The old Rehaan wouldn’t have noticed.

“No Rey am fine. In fact, go ahead and arrange everything. Make it into a house party maybe. We will have everyone over for lunch on Saturday. We can order some pizza and have a movie night or something and then have a lazy Sunday. What say?”

“Even more brilliant! Awesome.”

“Yeah.”

“you really are okay?”

“Just bit of overwork.”

“Everything is okay between you and Geet right?”

Maan just nodded his head. It didn’t feel so much like a lie. Rehaan left. Truth is he could understand Geet’s emotional state. But it is not easy loving someone without being loved. He was a mere human and sometimes he grew selfish. But the idea of not loving Geet suffocated him. He would rather be anything to her than be a no one to her.

******

“I am telling you Annie, Maan agreed to it.”

“And how was he Rey?”

“Same. Pretending he is all right when I can see that he was falling apart. “

“I don’t know what to do Rey? How do we help bhai?”

“Maan had the idea of turning this into a house party. Let’s get on with it. I have a feeling this house party will change lives.”

“How much do you want to bet that it has something to do with Geet. I just don’t know what has happened?”

“Ann, sometimes people get hurt. Don’t blame when in reality we know nothing.”

“I am not blaming anyone Rey. I just want my brother to be happy. He deserves it.”

“Yeah he does. But it’s up to fate now dear.”

“Should I call up Arjun do you think?”

“You have to start talking someday. But I can do it if you want.”

“Then let me be a coward for few days more Rey. You go ahead and invite him.”

“I have a meeting with him so I will talk to him then. I will invite Pari then as well.”

“Then I will handle Brij bhai and Sam di.”

“Cool!”

“What about Geet?”

“Oh I think our dear brother will handle that on his own.”

“Are we doing the right thing Rey? “

“We are doing nothing as such Ann. We want to have an opportunity to observe them. We won’t meddle. We will just be there for Maan if he needs us. We just want to be prepared.”

“Maybe we are overthinking Rey. Maybe it is all a lover’s tiff.”

“Let’s hope so.”

Rey kept his thoughts to himself. From what he had seen, things were definitely not okay. Maan was struggling with something. But Annie did not need to be anymore worried.

“Hey Ann!”

“What?”

“Can you make me a cup of coffee? “

“Sure. I will call up Brij bhai while making coffee.”

“You know what, I will talk to Brij bhai while at their office. Why don’t you just see to Sam and Vicky.”

“That actually makes sense.”

Annie left leaving Rey pondering on Maan. Maan had always been a supportive brother to him. It’s time he can be there for him.

******

Anne was taking the stairs as she thought about what to say to Sam di. Her cell started ringing. She saw it was Vicky calling her.

“Hey!”

Somehow seeing his name always brought a smile on her face.

“Why do you sound so down?”

“How do you know my mood just by my voice Vicky? How do you do it?”

“I love you Annie! I know how you sound when you are excited or upset. I know the difference.”

“Every time I think I begin to understand the extent of your love Vicky, you surprise me yet again.”

“I love you a little more than yesterday and a little lesser than tomorrow.”

She could feel the blush rise on her cheek.

“Now tell me Annie, what’s up?”

“I am worried about Maan bhai.”

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s not well. He has dark circles and seems really down.”

“I don’t want to undermine your worry but maybe you are overthinking. Maybe he just is worried about something related to the company.”

“Well, Rey and I are doing everything to lessen his burden as much as we can.”

“I am sure he appreciates both of you.”

“We are planning a house party this weekend at the khurana mansion. Nothing fancy. Saturday lunch will be homecooked by us all sort of like a picnic. The dinner might be pizzas. And then we can have a lazy Sunday just chilling. A perfect weekend to unwind.”

“Sounds great!”

“So you are in, right?”

“Does that mean I will finally get the ‘hurt our sister and you die’ talk this weekend?”

“Stop being so filmy Vicks. And if you break my heart the least of your worries are my brothers….”

“Yes, vicious little thing that you are!”

“Stop laughing. I can be very scary.”

“I love you Annie.”

“I love you too.”

“If I am taking the weekend off I need to work. For the record, it’s adorable that you think you are scary!”

She could hear Vicky laughing and it soothed her soul hearing him laugh. But she had a reputation to maintain.”

“I hate you!”

“Love you too! Gotta go.”

He cut the call but his love helped her deal with her restless heart. Annie was smiling as she carried the coffee back upstairs for Rehaan. Somehow, Vicky made everything easier. She decided to make a day out of inviting Sam di. Anyway, Sam di would need convincing and it was better done face to face.

After handing the coffee to Rehaan she called up Sam di.

“hello Annie, Wassup?”

“I am fine. Di, are you free?”

“Right now?”

“Yeah!”

“I am at a shoot. I will be done in another hour. Why don’t we meet in say two hours?”

“That’s cool.”

“Anything serious Annie?”

“Not at all di. I just haven’t met you for a long time. Will we meet at your place?”

“That’s for best. Malati is there so you can wait for me there in case am little late. You know how the shoots can be.”

“Sure di. You take your time. And then we can catch up like old days.”

Part 57

Clarity of thoughts

Arjun was busy. His last meeting was running late. Rehaan wasn’t worried. He found it a good time to talk to both Brij and Pari. Pari was busy so he asked Brij’s personal assistant if he had a few minutes. He was lucky and got into Brij’s chamber.

“Brij bhai!”

“Rehaan, what a nice surprise.”

Something had hanged positively for Brij. For once his smile was lighter as if some weight had been lifted off him.

“You look good Brij bhai. Hope everything is okay at home?”

“Yeah. For once, my life is on track. Dad’s reports were good and mom is doing well. Come on, have a seat.”

“Bhai, I am here mainly for some work with Arjun but I wanted to invite you for a house party at ours. This weekend.”

“Anything special?”

“Nothing like that. Just few friends chilling and spending some time together. “

“I have nothing as such todo. I sure can join. Who else will be there?”

“Nothing has been confirmed. It’s super casual you know. We plan on inviting Sam, Arjun, Pari, Geet and Vicky. Of course Muskaan would be there as well.”

“Are you sure about Arjun and Sam being there?”

“You sound like Maan.”

“I guess we are having similar doubts.”

“They can’t avoid each other for life Brij bhai. It would be better if the first meeting full of awkwardness happens in front of people who won’t judge.”

“That’s actually very good point. I am in.”

“I won’t waste anymore of your time. See you this weekend.”

Rehaan left Brij’s chamber. Slowly the weekend plan was turning into reality. He really hoped that whatever problem was keeping Maan from a restful sleep will soon solve.

As he came out he saw that Arjun was still busy. His assistant began to apologize for the delay but Rehaan was cool with the delay. He went to the reception and said hello to Pari. Pari had a lot of work so he didn’t bother her much. He just informed her that he needed to speak with her for a bit.

******

Maan was done for the day. In fact, he was supposed to meet Geet at the flat. Muskaan was at school and Geet didn’t have any class in the afternoon .They had been very discreet but after that first time after meeting Geet’s father, they really had met few times more.

Truth to be told, Maan loved those stolen hours. He knew Geet wasn’t ready to love him yet. But loving her, worshipping her soothed his soul. He reached the penthouse that Geet was already inside.

“Hey Maan, tough day?”

“Actually. I am looking forward to a bit of unwinding.”

“I know just the thing.”

Geet could sense Maan was bone tired. It tugged a part of her heart that Geet had long thought was dead. She began brewing coffee just the way Maan liked it.

Suddenly she felt two hand slide around her waist as Maan hugged her from behind and placed his face in the crook of her neck.

“Heyyyy….”

“I love being with you Geet. Here, with you I can just be Maan.”

“I am glad. Here with you I can just be Geet as well.”

She turned and face him. He brought her nearer. The way his eyes spoke so much more than he ever did always intrigued her. He raised his eyebrows and she shook her head. Something in her eyes showed her to be utterly vulnerable in that moment. He pulled her in his arms and in that moment they felt complete.

“Now tell me Maan what are you so worried about?”

“Not worried per se but…. Annie and Rey are planning a house party this weekend.”

“And the idea of relaxing is making you worried?”

Her laughing eyes lightened the mood and Maan automatically relaxed a bit.

“You and Muski are invited. I hope you will join us.”

“Oh!”

“Cat got your tongue?”

“What are you truly worried about Maan? Us?”

“No Geet. We are two consenting adults and whatever we have between us is private. The thing is Arjun would be there and so would Vicky. That is bound to be awkward. Sam would be there as well. I think this weekend is going to be awkward as hell.”

“Okay I understand the potential for awkwardness. Are you sure you want to attend?”

“Truth is Geet I need the break. I am swamped with work and relaxing sounds like wonderful thing. And I agree with Rey that its better to get past the first awkward meeting.”

“So stop worrying. Leave Arjun and Vicky to themselves. You can’t help them anyway. And I am sure you and Sam can handle yourselves. Now relax. “

“Sam would take one look at us and know”

“Know what? That we are sleeping together?”

“Is that it Geet? Are we just two people sleeping together? What do people call it nowadays? F**kbuddies?”

“MAAN!”

“I want to understand what we are Geet? I am not saying that you should declare your undying love for me or even say more than you are ready for but shouldn’t we be able to discuss what we are wanting out of this… whatever this is. I am not a teenager Geet. I am not in this for just some lust crazed sex. I enjoy our time together. I look forward to our intimacies. But maybe it’s time we talk about how we want to move forward.”

“Why can’t we just enjoy our time together without all this? “

“Remember the first night we met Geet.”

“I can never forget that night!”

“We were hurt that night Geet. We let go of rationality that night. I am not a cheater and neither were you. But we did let go of our sense of moralities that night.”

“I know all this Maan. Why are we rehearsing this again?”

“I want to remind you of the morning after Geet when reality intruded upon. We tend to gloss over that but the morning after is as important as the night.”

“What do you mean?”

“The night was amazing. It was the worst night of my life yet meeting you, making love to you was the best thing that happened to me and I regret nothing.”

“I regret nothing either. For along time, I thought we made a mistake because Sam was hurt but I can’t pretend to regret it anymore. I am sorry Sam was hurt but I needed you and I believe you needed me as well.”

Maan was silent. He let go of her and put some distance between them. He didn’t know how to express and his frustration was clear in his ungraceful movements.

“What’s wrong Maan?”

Geet was afraid of Maan for the first time. She knew Maan was determined to answer her and she was afraid of that answer.

“Geet I remember the next day very clearly as well. Have I ever talked about it?”

“No.”

Her voice was small, almost a tiny squeak. She waited for the answer that would surely change everything.

“I came back to Mumbai the next day. I was late and Sam was waiting. And I confessed everything to her as you know. And then I offered to fix our marriage you know. I realized that anybody could make mistake but it takes a lot to forgive and move on. It took my breaking the marriage vows to offer my wife a compassionate listener Geet. Do you realize how bad that sounds?”

Geet was silent and maybe for the first time she was hearing Maan open up his true self. She wasn’t ready for it but by God it was happening.

“I was an awful husband Geet. I was so used to hiding myself from everyone that I didn’t even share myself with my wife. And I in turn didn’t appreciate the woman I married completely. I had affection for her, I was attracted to her but I was not in love with her because I wouldn’t have done what I did if I loved her like I was supposed to.”

Maan took a deep breath and turn towards her. She could see in his eyes his resolution to speak his mind. The dam was finally breaking and she wasn’t ready to withstand the flood.

“You know why no matter how beautiful the night was I still can’t forget the day after?”

“No.”

“Because that night as my wife valiantly forgave me for breaking her I saw the light go out of her eyes. I broke something that night Geet that I can never ever unbreak again. And I did it because I didn’t appreciate the power I had. Love is beautiful but it gives you a lot of power to destroy someone.”

“Why are you telling me all these Maan?”

“I don’t know. Maybe now that I am finally speaking I can’t seem to stop.”

“Are you sure you don’t regret the night we met?”

“Oh I don’t regret you Geet. God knows I tried for few moments before realizing how impossible it is. Of course that was way before we met again. But I do have a point behind telling you all this. That night as I held Sam I made a vow to myself. I vowed to be a better man and never break a heart as I broke Sam’s.”

“You are a better man.”

“So now I have to be my true self to you. I love you Geet. I have moved on from that night Geet. I moved on from my pain. I took some time for myself and healed my heart. And that made it possible for me to love you. “

“Are you asking me if I love you?”

“No. I won’t manipulate or force you to confess anything you aren’t ready to. Don’t for a minute think so.”

“Then what is it you want?”

“I want clarity I guess. I am not that man anymore Geet who used sex to hide his pain and get momentary relief. It doesn’t help Geet. Because next day f**king nothing changes. I grew up and became the adult I am supposed to be. I deal with things head on instead of running or hiding.”

“What do you mean?”

“I guess I understand Geet. Now that I know more about your childhood I understand. But life doesn’t work that way. We can’t just ignore the bad things happening to us simply because we don’t want to deal with them. That’s not living Geet, that’s even barely surviving. That day after Mohinder uncle talked to you you wanted us to have sex and I gave in. We have been meeting quite regularly after that and I see why. It’s fun and relaxing to get away from the world and be in a bubble but we can’t live our life that way.”

“You can’t dictate how I choose to live my life.”

“Fair enough I guess. But similarly you can’t make decisions for me either Geet.”

“Speak plainly Maan.”

“I am not that guy anymore Geet who used sex to hide his pain. That day after you talked to your father you needed me and I was there. But this cannot continue Geet. I love you. I want to spend rest of my life with you in a meaningful relationship. Ideally I would marry you and be a family to you and muski. God I love that girl so much. But I would understand if you are not ready for a marriage or even us being partners. In that case, I would love to be a family friend to you. What I won’t be to you is a f**kbuddy. Its something that would in a long run be detrimental to my mental health.”

“Are you giving me an ultimatum Maan?”

“No, you don’t have to decide right now. Take sometime say a week to decide. But I want to know if you see any future with me.”

Geet was silent. Maan came near her and raised her chin so see could look directly in his eyes. His eyes clearly show the love he felt for her. It was killing him to do this to her.

“I thought I would have loved to be in your life in any way no matter how small. But I can’t pretend that I can just be the guy you have sex with when you find time. I want to shower you with love and want to wake you up in the morning with my kisses. I want to see your hair rumpled and I want to be the man you went home with. I want to be there in Muski’s school on sports days to cheer for her. I want to be a second father to her if she allows else be the uncle she can think of as a father figure. But I can’t be all those if you can’t find in your heart to love me and be ready to receive my love. I am an all or nothing kind of person when it comes to you. I can’t just be in a physical relationship with you because nothing about us is just physical. It has never been just physical. Take your time and make a decision. Either accept me or let me go.”

Maan lowered his head and kissed her with all the love he had. It was a goodbye kiss. It was a kiss of a man who knew it might be the last time he gets to kiss her. Geet responded with equal passion. Once he broke the kiss he placed a kiss on her forehead.

Geet held onto him fearing she would lose him if she let go.

“Come to the house party and bring muski. It might give you some clarity about the life I envision for us. “

“I am scared Maan.”

“It’s okay to be scared. What’s not okay is to let that fear rule your life Geet.”

She realized that he had already let go of her and she was the one holding him back. She felt tears pooling and slowly slip. Slowly she let him go. He smiled and then slowly turned and left the penthouse.

Geet put down her key and left after sometime not knowing if she will ever return to this bliss again. Maan had left few minutes before but there was no sign of him.