Today's conversation was so intricate.
The part that stood out to me the most was Imlie's anger. She hates his close book manner. Woh apne zindagi ka har pehlu uske samne rakh chuki hai aur Aryan ne uss se itna bada sach chupaya. There were so many opportunities but he never shared the vengeance in his heart. He's an enigma that she can't wrap her head around and it sucks cause she wants to. She so wants to. She wants to be there for him. That day in the office when Aditya got stripped of his awards, she went to him and tried to hard to listen to him. She doesn’t want to doubt you Aryan, and the fact is, she doesn’t. Not entirely at least. She isn’t asking you to defend yourself or your intentions, she’s asking for reassurance. Is my heart right for believing in you, for believing in us? She’s asking for clarity cause her heart and her fears are in different directions.
But, everything he does is followed by a contradiction. dard dete bhi ho aur sehte bhi ho. For example, he's hurting Imlie by putting her into this marriage situation but he's putting himself in danger by saving her from Doll's attack (I presume acid), without ever expressing it as a favour. Ankho ko dekhne ke liya kehte ho aur phir khud unhe bandh kar dete ho.
I'd like to think she's worried for him, for everyone around him, and for them. The state of their relationship is in shatters, she wants to trust him and she does, unconsciously, she just doesn't trust herself enough. Imlie is underconfident in ways that matter the most. She jumps between thinking her success is Aryan's charity to his badla, not recognizing that she did it. She wrote an article that was front-page worthy, she became a writer because of that article and her junoon to get into the office. She learned of his revenge and automatically assumed that her accomplishments were rubbish, a part of that plan. And Aryan amazes me. I don't know whether to pity him or love him. He gets so angry when she thinks he's using her because he doesn't want her to think of herself in derogatory terms. He's said so many times with equal frustration and desperation, how could you think so lowly of yourself? And it wins my heart.
I'd like to think a part of her doesn't want this marriage to save him from himself. To save him from becoming her enemy. Cause she knows she means something to him and she knows her resentment hurts him.
Aryan becomes beside himself when the idea of Imlie leaving him comes to mind and I'm glad he's voicing that. Tum waapas aaogi na? And the way he expresses his complaints to her. He feels ignored, he feels unloved and he doesn't hide that. Tum chati ho ki main jaon when he lived at the Tripathis to her worrying about her chappal (jokingly) than him. Mr. ABP, I think you're forgetting the girl almost called an ambulance for you and was broken at the thought of your death so, I think that should come your insecurities and fears a little. There's so much more I can say on this but I have a paper to write 😭
The song
Kar jaaniye raanjhe, ho darr jaaniye ranjhe
I keep doing it, I keep getting scared
Upparon teriyaan sochaan, mar jaaniye raanjhe
Thinking of you all the time, it kills me.
These lines sum up Imlie's dilemma so well. It scares Imlie that Aryan's slowly becoming a part of who she is. He became her himat, he became her support, but she can put that off as a friendship. But this, this thinking of him all the time, quoting him without trying to, how can she pass that off. 
Mera Ranjha, main raanjhe di
My beloved is mine, and I am his
The words 'apna' and 'partner' keep making their way into dialogues because it signifies the sense of ownership they have. They don't know how to define this relationship, partly because it terrifies them, and partly cause they don't understand it much themselves. but these words keep them together. Woh shayad Aryan ko kabhi uska Ranjha na bulaye, par usse apna partner bulana kabhi nahi chodegi and for me, that's more meaningful. Likewise, Aryan will never stop counting her in his apne. 
Ranjha hai chit-chor
He is such a heart stealer.
Aryan definitely is. Imlie stares at her mom these days wondering what magic Aryan's done to her kyunki kabhi kabhi toh lagta hai ki Aryan Meethi ki alaud hai, Imlie nahi. He stole Meethi's heart and he's stealing hers, without her knowing.
Je karke wo mil jaaye ta, Ki chahida hai hor
If by doing anything we become one, I'd want nothing else.
When he coloured her today, they looked like one. The softness, the way he grazed her cheeks, it was like the most intimate way to colour someone.
Other thoughts:
- I wish we got to see the aftermath of Holi - everyone seeing the red colour splashed on Imlie's face (and maybe the yellow on Aryan's back) and teasing them about it. Imlie blushes when everyone asks how he cornered her cause she's thinking of their intimate moment. Aditya's face burning in jealousy.
- How will Imlie get away with that? Like how did she put that sheet layer on her hand without anyone thinking it's abnormal?
 
 
 
  
 
  
  
  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 
 
  
 
 
 
  
  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
 
        