The two primary traits that define Dev Dixit are guilt and responsibility, the result of his childhood circumstances. These two traits also resulted in putting his mother on a pedestal for worship.
A big chunk of his operation is based on these two things. Either he is feeling guilty (read: Neha) or he feels responsible (read: his mother and his entire family)
That is why the interaction with Sona was such an important turning point of his life. With Sona, there was no guilt involved, nor any responsibility. He was just Dev, not Dev the Son, Dev the Brother, Dev the Boss or anything else. He was just Dev. It was a facet of his being that he had not known even existed. Where he could put away the basket of burdens and have a cup of coffee, laugh and talk without a filter to a person who did not expect him to do anything for her, other than just be there for her.
She became his emotional support system, his anchor, his confidante, his best friend, his love.
When his "God" wasn't happy about the relationship, Dev, a impulsive man of short-term solutions, found the first bandaid he could to make her happy. He broke up with Sona.
Losing her wasn't just losing his love, it was losing his support system with which he had finally been able to anchor himself. He reeled uncontrollably, bringing out some terrible traits.. the obsession, the stalking, the drinking, finally going into depression.
No introspection was done when he married Sona. He was so relieved to have her back and so paranoid that he would lose her that he hid the news about her fertility issues, lied about her pregnancy.. all the while over-compensating for what he had always known his entire life: guilt and responsibility towards his family. I believe this is where their relationship unraveled. Sona didnt become part of his family, she only became part of his life. So now Dev's life had two big halves: his family was on one half and Sona on the other. It didn't occur to him that Sona and his family can't be two different halves.
When they separated, I think Dev was genuinely bewildered. For him, Sona was his strength, his constant who could face anything, whether prenup, fertility, financial issues. That she couldn't do it anymore, that she gave up on them was probably something he couldn't fathom. How could she? She had promised to never leave him even if he left her! He channels it all into a rage against her, that she had somehow let them both down.
Dev does introspect eventually and admits that he didn't stand for her when she needed him, finally reuniting with Sona. The separation fuels his paranoia even more that he would lose her, really obsessing over her. He cools a little when he saw that this was driving her away farther, but his attention never wavers from her.
That is why I am not able to reconcile with this S3 Dev. The S3 Dev seems like a stranger to me, who looks like S1 Dev, acts a lot like him, but missing some major important bits of his character, that developed in the past 10 years.
He is still caring towards Sona, but in a routine manner, oblivious to her feelings. He is back to worshiping his mother on a pedestal and quiet when she was rains accusations on Sona.
The guilt and responsibility that has always defined Dev, takes another new face, that of a little boy, who reminds him of himself. His world is shaken by the revelation of Ayush. So despite Sona wanting time to adjust, Dev, the man of short-term solutions is quick to bring the boy home and fix it all.
His biggest weakness has always been his mother, whose shortcomings he fails to see. His weakness was somewhat rectified when Ishwari herself goes on a path of correction, and he himself realizes that she can mistakes too. He finally learns to speak his mind to her. She was still his "God", but not infallible anymore in his eyes. This was one of the biggest developments of Dev's character.
So at the dining table, when Ayush is intimidated into stuffing food into his mouth, Dev being a silent spectator didn't quite sync.
The latest promo on Sony has Dev sitting for puja, makes me more shocked. Dev had always been an atheist, unapologetically so. It was one of his most distinctive traits, setting him apart from most other ITV heroes.
So I, for one, think this Dev is not the quite the same one from previous seasons. Dev, where are you?
P.S. this is not a pro-Dev or Sona post. This is just my perception of Dev Dixit and my wonderment are how he seems so different in this new season.
Dev and Sona both have their share of flaws, thus making Devakshi relatable 🧡
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