Ishq par Zor Nahi - EDT#26 Aa Dekhe Zara Kisme Kitna Hai Dum - Page 86

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jacinta_91 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Champa2012


I have been married for 22 years. Has always been working. Had to stop working due to visa issues when I moved to U.S for about 2 years.

Long story shot, I have always been financially independent except for that 2 years. My advice to every single person is to never depend on anyone else financially. No offense to homemakers who do not bring money to the table. THey are actually doing much more if you put a monetary value to their effort, time and creativity. Having said that (particularly for an Indian woman), you never know what is in store tomorrow. Husband might get into an accident and has a long recovery, he might get laid off and not be able to get work for a while or worst case scenario might cheat and move out or die.

One should be able to support herself and kids if needed. So, buaji can take a chill pill. She will not come to your aid if and when you need it. Make your parents understand your POV and it will be fine. Good luck dealing with family.


Thank you for your advice,thats what i want too.not to be dependent on anyone including my future husband.will definitely talk out to my family and try and make them understand my feelings ☺️🙏

Nandini_goyal thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: jacinta_91


Touchwood my parents are very supportive,i have never got pressure from them for marriage instead they encourage me to work hard and be financially strong,my mom nature wise is a bit soft so whenever she says something it goes unheard esp since my dad side she is the youngest daughter in law but my dad is strong he does occasionally give back but he is always misunderstood by his family because they think he purposely dont want me to be married so it makes me feel miserable,like guilty because in a way they have to fight for me

it’s good that your parents are supportive, that’s the only thing you can ever wish for.
About your mother being the youngest in the household from her generation, they need to be more assertive about their feelings and it’s for every aspect of life and I guess that is just how life is. Mellow people are further suppressed by others, so what I have learnt is that you need to be assertive from the very beginning but also choose your battles wisely. To support you, your mother will have to give it back to the relatives or just learn to not care.

Don’t feel guilty for when your parents have to fight for you because-

A. You are in this world because they wanted to be parents not because you wanted to come to the world.
B. It’s a parent’s duty to stand for their child/ children and to protect them.
C. They stand by you because they love you.

What our relatives need to understand and they don’t is that despite being a family and sometimes a single unit, the parents and their children are a single unit in lots of aspects and different from rest of the family. When growing up a person judges the things that were done to him/ said to him and decides if he will like to continue it or not.
Even though relatives are part of our family unit but still different on some level and they should respect that and sometimes they just need to let others be and live life on their own terms
For instance, Your parents understand the value of being independent and the importance of financial independence and have imbibed that in you and are now supporting you about for same.
Even if your bua might be brought up by the same set of parents as your dad, it’s alright for both of them to see things differently and she will just have to learn to accept that.
Also, sometimes aunts and uncles don’t agree with your way but stop nagging, and that’s fine too, so you relax and focus on achieving your goals


Nandini_goyal thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Blossom06

Happy Birthday 🎂

Wish you a Blessed Year Ahead 😇

thanks a ton!


jacinta_91 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Monstuholic

it’s good that your parents are supportive, that’s the only thing you can ever wish for.
About your mother being the youngest in the household from her generation, they need to be more assertive about their feelings and it’s for every aspect of life and I guess that is just how life is. Mellow people are further suppressed by others, so what I have learnt is that you need to be assertive from the very beginning but also choose your battles wisely. To support you, your mother will have to give it back to the relatives or just learn to not care.

Don’t feel guilty for when your parents have to fight for you because-

A. You are in this world because they wanted to be parents not because you wanted to come to the world.
B. It’s a parent’s duty to stand for their child/ children and to protect them.
C. They stand by you because they love you.

What our relatives need to understand and they don’t is that despite being a family and sometimes a single unit, the parents and their children are a single unit in lots of aspects and different from rest of the family. When growing up a person judges the things that were done to him/ said to him and decides if he will like to continue it or not.
Even though relatives are part of our family unit but still different on some level and they should respect that and sometimes they just need to let others be and live life on their own terms
For instance, Your parents understand the value of being independent and the importance of financial independence and have imbibed that in you and are now supporting you about for same.
Even if your bua might be brought up by the same set of parents as your dad, it’s alright for both of them to see things differently and she will just have to learn to accept that.
Also, sometimes aunts and uncles don’t agree with your way but stop nagging, and that’s fine too, so you relax and focus on achieving your goals



Thank you nandini for your advice🙏.i will talk to my parents about this because i want to be clear once and for all regarding my marriage and be financially independent first ☺️😍

netflicks thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: kankabhor

Sony, atleast new promo to de do 😡

this is so typical of sony- they will just kill our show like this…there have been no promos since so many days


Wanderlust05 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: jacinta_91


I see but what if im not ready yet, marriage is a big commitment and i feel till mentally i am not ready i shouldnt take any hasty decision.the problem is my buaji calls up my elder uncle and talks about me and says all kind of things....but the irony thing is when their kids were getting married neither my dad or mom or us interfered because we felt its their wish but it doesnt seem the same with us.i was just sick and tired and emotionally drained so i ask for advice


I may be the last person to give you advice, but I feel marriage isn't like dating someone- where you can break up easily and involves the two of you only. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, a bond between two families and as conservative as I may sound- a sacred relationship. One should get married only when they're ready in all aspects- emotionally especially. And if you want to be financially independent too, there's no problem; cuz women are to be given the right to be independent and not look up to their husbands for monetary help.

I know of a girl who got married at a very young age- she was about 19-20 years old- she wasn't forced or anything tho but she got married (and at that time, she admits, she wasn't ready herself)- anyways 4-5 years later, they got divorced and their families are now at loggerheads with each other (who were, once upon a time very close friends).

Anyhoo, I feel you should take a polite yet firm stand for yourself. You know, tell her you aren't ready as of now and will get married at your convenience. Be polite, don't argue or raise your voice, because then bawaal mach jaana hai (Indian adults), but have that firmness in your voice.

And, if you want to, can go ahead with just seeing prospective grooms- get to know them, listen and talk to them. And if you do, I feel you should come clear with him and his family on your desire to work and be independent. Again, this is coming from someone who's way too small, but I hope it helps ❤️

Ms.SK thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Sony busy promoting KRPKAB 3 at the moment. First trp might be around 1.0 but after that wouldn't be surprised somewhere around 0.4-0.8 and then gradually 0.4-0.5 😆 FL is over rated in my opinion

Wanderlust05 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Ms.S.K.

Sony busy promoting KRPKAB 3 at the moment. First trp might be around 1.0 but after that wouldn't be surprised somewhere around 0.4-0.8 and then gradually 0.4-0.5 😆 FL is over rated in my opinion


forget the FL, I feel the whole show is overrated😆

netflicks thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Ipzn episode 1 has 8.7 million views on YouTube…. This is in less than 4 months time.

IAdoreYou thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: Wanderlust05


forget the FL, I feel the whole show is overrated😆

Kaash main bhi itna khul ke bol Pati! Thesis likh deti yaha. 🤣

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