Ques for those who hv done arranged marriage:How is ur compatibility? - Page 6

Originally posted by: Stark_Wolf

I got arrange married when I was 19 to someone whom I met 3 times before marriage n talked on phone for 6 months.. It was horrible for 1st 2years I really din't know what I wanted I was completing my college without any idea what I wanted to do after that.. I used to shout at him for every small things.. I was terrible n he was too

He was outgoing namesake Muslim n iam someone who wear hijab n pray 5 times.. I used to standout like a sore thumb in his friends circle bt then one day no wifi n we talked about what we wanted why we were fighting? Why I was always sad? He suggested I could do pg n work with my sister.. I somehow ended up doing all that n working out my marriage too.. I just love my life n I wouldn't change it for anything. Now I have 3.5year old baby n iam happy

Compatability I don't think we have any our taste n likes are too different bt we know not to interfere in others matters like he doesn't ask me not to wear hijab n I don't ask him to pray.. He doesn't force me to go with him to meet his friends n I don't force him for family function.we discuss our work n give suggestions bt don't force.. We do what we like n respect each others wishes but if he was someone who would force me to be social n change I wouldn't be happy.

Marry only if you want don't do it for your family or baby.. I dint know why I married I deffo dint want one but I was too scared n little to say No but it got worked out because I was married to a good one not everyone is that lucky.. So think a lot about what you want.

Bold-2- Alhamdulillah

Originally posted by: AwaamKiJaan

I was in an arranged marriage with a guy for seven years. He was 12 years older than me. I married him because he was a rich businessman and from a well-to-do family. Didn't turn out well at all. I thought I would live life king size, but materialistic things are not enough for a happy married life.

My spouse had a really regressive mentality. Our thought process didn't match because of being from different generations. He was a misogynist and had terrible opinions about women. I didn't want a kid but his family pressured us into having one.

After seven years I had it enough and I finally decided to leave his house and take divorce. Everyone including my parents told me to not take divorce, to think about my kid, but I didn't listen.

Our divorce case is still in court while I'm living with my parents along with my kid.

This is a fake story but if you do an arranged marriage, you would most likely be telling a similar story like this after 10 years in some other forum. Arranged marriage is the biggest stupidity someone can do in life, and the second biggest stupidity is thinking that it works because it has less divorce rates.

Like taking divorce is so easy in a country like India. Arranged marriage only works because most of the time people don't have any option other than living with their spouse in a toxic marriage. Because they would face a whole lot of new troubles, like court battles, parents pressure, child custody and the biggest one being "chaar log kya kahenge".

You can't choose your life partner in one sitting in a restaurant between a cup of coffee. Date, get in relationships, see if you're fully compatible with the guy you want to get married with.

Then only think about taking the big decision of getting married. It's your whole life. Don't take chances.

You are so good at writing scenarios. You could literally be a script writer 😆

Jokes aside, your point is spot on.

Originally posted by: MallikaDua

My case is just like yours. I couldn't find anyone by myself. I have met around 12-13 guys whom my parents had selected. I didn't like even one! Now they are pressurizing me a lot!😭 I am 28 years old but I am made to feel like I am 40.

Tbh, it's not your parents fault,pressure is there because with each passing year availability of quantity of decent guys in arrange marriage system cease to exist , when you touch 30 the pool would be too limited for even getting a guy from arrange marriage unless you are lucky.

So better luck with dating

My family is searching for a guy for me😆but I feel arranged marriage is tough..at least in case of searching for a good guy for yourself. My parents are okay with me having meetings with a guy till I am sure about him😆though i have not have any exclusive meetings yet. I feel it's gonna take longer and I should have started early for searching because the peer pressure n fomo is real..n on the top of it I'm a manglik girl😆 I really don't care about it but most of people who are going for arranged marriage do think of this things. I'm financially independent and a happy go lucky person. I was always single by choice in my life. In a month I guess only for 4-5 days I feel like really having someone in my life or to have life partner😆on rest days I'm happy being single. Since I'm financially independent and my parents are there for me to give emotional or mental support sometimes I don't find anything missing in my life. At this point I'm at confused stage of my life😆

It's good that my parents are okay with premarital courtship but I guess after sometime they might give up on this when I'll pass that perfect eligible age for marriage.

Originally posted by: Maroonporsche

I was at a stage of life where that seemed like a good idea 😆something about that time. I had failed in romance ( so Many times 😂)

So I thought of it like a business deal. An at the same it made the most sense.

I did some thinking. I drove in my car blasting music for a hour (that’s how I think) an I said to myself Kyle. Kyle is what I call myself 😆 I said Kyle I think this might go well. Maybe risk like this can pay off. An knock on wood things turned out fine (for now)

And they say romance is dead 😆

Originally posted by: Muskie

I apologise in advance for saying this if you feel bad but you should try to motivate him to pray salah, at least one or twice a day, maybe he'd get habituated and might start praying all 5 times

Bold-2- Alhamdulillah

I don't mind..None of my family other than my sister husband is religious.. So me praying on time is like joke for all of them

Whenever I ask him even as joke he goes like tumare ghafan main sirf tum hogi aur mere main sirf main.. He is not a kid n I can't force him to do what he doesn't want to do even if it hurts me it is his life he let me live like I wanted n I should respect his life.

Ok my turn🙋

I got married on 26th Jan 2021😅

He's 35 I'm 25, never wanted to get married in the first place, family made me understand did few prayers if this is good for me or not, finally said yes.

We too have difference of opinions he believes that girls should be wearing hijaab in front of everyone though I too love wearing my hijaab but I don't agree with him at all, he points out his views in a sensible way and I argue 😆because he's not ready to understand a simple point that Islam is not that strict, people made it like that. Apart from that everything is fine Alhamdulillah

Originally posted by: MommaDarling

We all can vouch for your love ishhtory with your husband and hate ishhtory with your devar. The latter is more entertaining tbh🥳🤣

Of course it is. My love ishtory is dragging these days like Ekta soaps

Oh this thread reminds of a particular member - binkuchkahe or something from Bin, whose stroy went like bumping into a stranger or she falling and he hold her or something like that and then meeting him in her society....

Yaar kaha ho? Please update the aage ki story.

Originally posted by: bollyqueen0

And they say romance is dead 😆

I keep romance alive one flower a day 😆