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So its okay if Virat's present gets dragged into fighting arena everyday by his bff based on her past (with him). Virat and esp Sai have to continuously defend their present and are questioned.

But today his wife is dragging Pakhi's past into the fighting arena as retort, suddenly it is a problem?

Is Sai lying about Pakhi? Did she not marry Samrat to stay close to Virat? Is she not trying to separate Sai and Virat so that eventually she can marry Virat?

When Pakhi can insult Sai everyday without a second thought, why can't Sai play the same game.

Only coz she is SP FL? Sai gives it back as much or more than what she gets.

If she can't handle the truth, Pakhi shouldnt have started it.

Virat ki toh waise bhi bajni hi hain (he was even questioned for hand feeding his wife), so he doesnt care as much. Infact Virat and Sai never had problems with public confrontations, they go back to being normal.

Originally posted by: laksh

How can we say that? Virat told her that he can't accept her as his wife. Virat told her that he cannot be her husband. Virat told her that he had promised someone else that he cannot give place in his heart to any other woman. Sai heard all these and still agreed to marry him.

How does it matter if Virat fell in love with Sai and is still carrying on his special friendship with Pakhi? Virat had anyway told Pakhi that he has no feelings for her, so how can we blame Virat even if he moves with Pakhi like she is his friend and he is not aware of what her expectations are from him? How is Virat wrong in expecting Sai to reciprocate his feelings after his feelings towards Sai has changed? Whatever he had said was said months back, his feelings and whatever he has been doing is what that matters even if that meand that he doesn't stand up for her in front of his family, even if that means he doesnt stand up for his wife when she gets humiliated by his ex cum friend, even if that means that he will play friendship frienship with a friend who openly keeps showering love on him and also will confess her feelings for him.

Sai knew what she was getting into (though she had no clue that she had to live with such a family and Virat's ex who will roam around him like a madhumakki). Virat took her responsibility, married her after telling all the truth, hence she has no rights to question or fight back even if she is being humiliated or wronged or instigated.

Let me try to understand this.

Even after I write the above, I wonder when a man has been so honest

- to set conditions or clearly stated his situation before marriage to the girl whom he was about to get married to

- told his would be wife and even after she became his wife as what to expect from him and what not to time and again

- had expected that the deal wife adjusts with his family

- expected the deal wife to understand how important his family members were for him, asked his deal wife to not disrespect his family members

- expected the deal wife to understand how important his friend was and not to disrespect or hurt or insult his pyaar oops friend

- expected the deal wife to understand his friendship, be empathetic towards his friend whose husband went MIA and act respectfully towards her

- has even fought/warned/yelled the deal wife to have hurt/insulted his friend

in a marriage which was not supposed to be a real one, which was only a deal marriage.

The same man doesnt think it is necessary

- to be honest with his wife about his past

- to communicate or clarify that his past is past and means nothing else

- to express his changed feelings to his wife whom he considers to be a real wife and no longer a deal wife

- to ask his wife to consider it to be a real marriage

- to ask his family members to behave respectfully with his wife or not to insult her

- to ask his friend only FRIEND to behave respectfully with his wife, not to insult/hurt his wife

- cannot fight/warn/yell the FRIEND to have hurt/insulted his wife (whom he considers to)

- draw clear lines with his friend and also maintain them at all times, not like one day his wife is in his harms, he would himself hold his friend's hand to stop and another day when his wife is upset with him would ask his friend to not even touch him

- cannot inmediately react but instead would stand as a mute spectator when his wife keeps getting humiliated or targeted unlike his instant reaction for his family members/friends

when he no longer thinks that the marriage is a deal one and who wants to make is a real one, who wants his wife to understand his changed feelings, wants his wife to reciprocate his feelings .

Why do we and many of us smell hypocrisy or double standards in him ?

So many high expectations from just a deal wife for whom the family or a friend is no one but his family or friend but was obligated to follow his expectations because he tòok his responsibility and because she was dependent on him or was taking a favour from him because he was getting her educated 🤔?

Very little expectations from friends and family when it comes to how to behave or treat his wife even when she was once dependent on him and even now when she is no longer his responsibility and who is no longer dependent on him, whom he is head over heels in love with, whom he wants to spend the rest of his life with 🤔?

Expectations from a girl who was about to be his wife and who had also become his wife, to not think him to be her husband, to not act like a wife (can ask not to interfere in his famiy matters, not to act possessive of him when he moves with his friend or when his friend moves with him, can ask not to question his relationship with his friend)

but zero expectations from a friend cum sister in law to not act like a wife (would not clearly state that it is not her job to feed him food or keep serving him food, can't protest immediately that she shouldn't be packing his clothes along with hers, can't ask not to interfere between husband and wife's matter, can't ask not to act possessive when a husband is feeding his wife, can't ask not to question about their relationship or what he got out of this marriage, can't say it is not her business but his wife's business to take care of him, can't say that he sent her away from the hospital because his wife was with him and she shouldn't have been there in first place).

Whom should we feel sorry for? Can't sorry for a girl because she was informed by him before their marriage that he had committed to someone else? Have to feel sorry for the husband because he had anyway let his situation and truth know to the girl whom he was marrying? Have to feel sorry for him because his friend humiliated his wife yet again and the wife dared to retort or respond or react with a fact she was aware of and the same fact was conveniently forgotten by his friend by trying to act a victim accusing the wife in front of the family that she made her husband sleep on the living room couch only because she found the two friends talking ?

You have beautifully explained the nuances of the hypocrisy we are being subjected to in the name of drama. Seems like some don’t want to understand the dire circumstances under which Sai assented to become a deal wife and just because of her one decision, every wrongdoings she is being subjected is kosher and must be acquiesced to. Otherwise the door is open for her to walk out, as if it’d be easy to do so coz her circumstances hasn’t changed much, except for her having access to her father’s money.
The same people forget Virat swore to a dying man to take up his daughter’s responsibility, but does his responsibility ends with him marrying her and financing her education? Isn’t it his responsibility to provide her safe environment where she could flourish without being subjected to disparaging insults all the time from all and sundry for just being his deal wife?
If Virat is unable to keep his side of bargain, irrespective of his changed feelings it is unfair to expect from Sai to abide by the deal and put up with shenanigans of his ‘dil ke acche gharwale.’

Since we are talking about double standards and hypocrisy. I have few questions. It’s not directed towards anyone but in general

1. When Pakhi drags Virat and her past , it’s an issue but when Sai does it isn’t ?

2. Pakhi insults Sai and Sai should insults Pakhi but dragging Virat is justified because he was once her ex and Sai’s present. Since he committed the big sin of having a past he deserves to be humiliated every day be it Pakhi , Sai or anyone .

3. What did Sai achieve by dragging the past ? She could have called Virat and confronted him about the sleeping arrangements infront of all and the fact that Pakhi knew everything but no that wouldn’t make her a strong FL . The criteria for strong FL is insult ML .

4. Anything is justified in the name of Provocation . Since it’s not physical but mental harassment it’s fine and shouldn’t be raised as an issue . Was Provocation good reason for Virat to throw her out or hold her hand . No and the same applies to Sai as well . Provocation is not a good reason to violate someone’s consent and force him to share something that he is not comfortable with . If there was a role reversal then by now there would be an uproar

🤣🤣🤣👏👏

By pointing fingers towards virat some forget sai herself is hypocrite & carries double standards.

Anyways I will provide about hypocrisy & double standards tomorrow 4 Sure.

Good night 💤

Originally posted by: 404_NotFound

Since we are talking about double standards and hypocrisy. I have few questions. It’s not directed towards anyone but in general

1. When Pakhi drags Virat and her past , it’s an issue but when Sai does it isn’t ?

2. Pakhi insults Sai and Sai should insults Pakhi but dragging Virat is justified because he was once her ex and Sai’s present. Since he committed the big sin of having a past he deserves to be humiliated every day be it Pakhi , Sai or anyone .

3. What did Sai achieve by dragging the past ? She could have called Virat and confronted him about the sleeping arrangements infront of all and the fact that Pakhi knew everything but no that wouldn’t make her a strong FL . The criteria for strong FL is insult ML .

4. Anything is justified in the name of Provocation . Since it’s not physical but mental harassment it’s fine and shouldn’t be raised as an issue . Was Provocation good reason for Virat to throw her out or hold her hand . No and the same applies to Sai as well . Provocation is not a good reason to violate someone’s consent and force him to share something that he is not comfortable with . If there was a role reversal then by now there would be an uproar

Sai is always innocent virat is always a culprit. Different rules 4 different people.

Originally posted by: 404_NotFound

Since we are talking about double standards and hypocrisy. I have few questions. It’s not directed towards anyone but in general

1. When Pakhi drags Virat and her past , it’s an issue but when Sai does it isn’t ?

2. Pakhi insults Sai and Sai should insults Pakhi but dragging Virat is justified because he was once her ex and Sai’s present. Since he committed the big sin of having a past he deserves to be humiliated every day be it Pakhi , Sai or anyone .

3. What did Sai achieve by dragging the past ? She could have called Virat and confronted him about the sleeping arrangements infront of all and the fact that Pakhi knew everything but no that wouldn’t make her a strong FL . The criteria for strong FL is insult ML .

4. Anything is justified in the name of Provocation . Since it’s not physical but mental harassment it’s fine and shouldn’t be raised as an issue . Was Provocation good reason for Virat to throw her out or hold her hand . No and the same applies to Sai as well . Provocation is not a good reason to violate someone’s consent and force him to share something that he is not comfortable with . If there was a role reversal then by now there would be an uproar

Your whole argument that something shouldn’t be shared because someone is uncomfortable to do so is overshadowed by the fact that that ‘something’ is used by a psycho to browbeat a woman but that ‘someone’ does nothing to obviate such situations, and as such, that ‘something’ no longer remains a mere sordid secret between two parties, but a weapon of humiliation. Since, the latter is done in public, one shouldn’t have problem if it is tackled publicly.

Originally posted by: Lostin90s

Your whole argument that something shouldn’t be shared because someone is uncomfortable to do so is overshadowed by the fact that that ‘something’ is used by a psycho to browbeat a woman but that ‘someone’ does nothing to obviate such situations, and as such, that ‘something’ no longer remains a mere sordid secret between two parties, but a weapon of humiliation. Since, the latter is done in public, one shouldn’t have problem if it is tackled publicly.

Originally posted by: Lostin90s

You have beautiful explained the nuances of the hypocrisy we are being subjected to in the name of drama. Seems like some don’t want to understand the dire circumstances under which Sai assented to become a deal wife and just because of her one decision, every wrongdoings she is being subjected is kosher and must be acquiesced to. Otherwise the door is open for her to walk out, as if it’d be easy to do so coz her circumstances hasn’t changed much, except for her having access to her father’s money.
The same people forget Virat swore to a dying man to take up his daughter’s responsibility, but does his responsibility ends with him marrying her and financing her education? Isn’t it his responsibility to provide her safe environment where she could flourish without being subjected to disparaging insults all the time from all and sundry for just being his deal wife?
If Virat is unable to keep his side of bargain, irrespective of his changed feelings it is unfair to expect from Sai to abide by the deal and put up with shenanigans of his ‘dil ke acche gharwale.’

Very true. His responsibility doesn't end by marrying her and financing her education. If that was the case, he need not have even married her, the villagers felt that she wouldn't be safe because of Vittal and Jagtap Mane. Virat himself saw that on the day of wedding and one of the villagers even pointed it out to him as why they even wanted to marry Sai in first place. Infact, that was why many audience were upset when Virat ousted Sai from the house and didn't rush to confirm if she was safe atleast after he came to know the truth.

Forget all these, yes, he is failing to give Sai a safe and secured environment and he should work on it.

What I don't understand is that if we criticise Virat that he fails to do it, it only means that he should correct it, the argument shouldn't be then who is asking Sai to stay with him. That is not how it works. If Virat is in pain, if he is in misery after marrying Sai, if he is very upset or gets heartbroken when his feelings are not reciprocated, does it mean that we suggest why is Virat still being in love with her, can we ask why can't he just move on. Both have to address their gaps, fix themselves, bring in change within themselves to make their relationship successful.

In general, I don't understand as why can't Sai stay back or feel a pull towards Virat and feel like coming back to him? Is Virat not feeling the same? Didn't Virat have conflicting feelings?

He always felt a pull towards Sai but he never let it come to surface for a long time. After marriage, he started to notice her. He looked at her the first time she came for the rasam and also kept looking at Pakhi to see how she was feeling and if she was feeling okay/comfortable to witness all those. He kept looking at Sai on the day of reception and even then had Pakhi on his mind that same night to see how was she taking it when they had arranged for his suhaagraat, so much that he was about to leave behind her when she left the room feeling bad and it was Sai who stopped him.

And then he kept feeling a pull towards Sai, he gave Sai a massage and when she built the pillow wall after her hands fell on him while sleeping, he somehow didn't like it, he wasn't happy with it. He kept peeping Sai through the gap too.

And then he refused to eat Thapipeeth because Pakhi had made bread butter 🤣🤣 and he didnt have anything only to avoid conflicts and also so that he doesn't upset Pakhi.

That same day he refused to share his problems with Sai who had only offered him food but told it to Pakhi. He had also said that he wouldn't have lost his pyaari cheez looking at Pakhi, he said that he wouldn't have got into the mess of his department alleging him of getting married to Sai forcefully if he had not gone to Gadchirolli and that same night after his allegations were cleared by Sai, he started to miss her in his room?

On the day Sai had slept in UMs room, he kept behaving like a husband warning her that if she stayed in UM's room, she cannot return to their room. When she didn't return to their room he was missing her.

The next day after Pakhi left the house, he fought with Sai, asked her if she was happy and if Pakhi leaving the house was not what she wanted, held her responsibile for Pakhi to have left their house indirectly.

He misses Sai and at the same time he asks her why should she have a problem even if there was anything between him and Pakhi, he misses her the previous night and also mixed up pyaar word for dosti when he spoke about Pakhi.

This shows how much he was swinging, how much of internal conflicts he had, he didn't even know what he was feeling until Holi. He kept having feelings for Sai but also kept feeling bad for Pakhi, felt bad that they couldn't get united.

Why can't Sai have the same kind of conflicted feelings? Why can't Sai scold him or fight with him and at the same time want to be with him?

Virat had two girls in his life and he had been having conflicting feelings and residual feelings from whatever he shared with Pakhi, Sai cannot have such a turmoil?

Sai cannot think that she will leave the house but also get pulled by feelings for Virat and return to the house?

Just because Sai doesn't have anyone in the world, does it mean that Sai wants Virat because she needs someone only to support her, for her own selfish reasons?

Can't it be for the feelings she have for Virat just like how Virat had for her? She is also going through the same kind of emotions, the pull, the denial, the confusion, the acceptance, the attraction all at once. It is a natural feeling.

Just like how Virat cannot switch off the buttons to stop feeling for Pakhi since it is related to emotions, Sai also cannot switch off any button to stop feeling whatever she is feeling.

Virat also felt jealous when he didn't even know he felt anything for Sai, he also acted possessive.

Sai cannot feel jealous or possessive only because she keeps telling it to be a deal marriage and that she will leave the house?

Virat misled Pakhi in the intial period? Who is Sai misleading? Virat? Then didn't Virat not mislead Sai by getting attached to her even though he kept calling her just a responsibility, even though he thought of it only to be a deal marriage?

Virat didn't stick to his end of the deal, he couldn't and he let it go off easily because he didn't have any burden. Sai didn't set the terms or conditions, he did, so there was no stopping him.

It wasn't that easy for Sai, she is sticking to her end of the deal and is not able to let go of it because she had agreed to the terms and conditions he had set during the marriage but unfortunately just like Virat, she also has conflicting feelings, she is also getting pulled by him, feeling attached to him, so she is failing to keep her words, ends up questioning Pakhi in her jealousy or possessiveness everytime Pakhi tries to show her jealousiness or love for Virat openly.

Virat only had to deal with people like Amay or Aniket once, Sai is dealing with Pakhi everyday and Pakhi is not like those guys, those guys never loved or liked Sai.

Pakhi says that she loves Virat and is acting like a crazy obsessive lover and Sai is facing all the taunts, wrath, her bitterness, hatred everything only because Sai is Virat's wife.

If the only way to deal with Pakhi is to stand up for herself when Virat is not around or when Virat fails to, especially when Pakhi puts all the blame on Sai even though Pakhi herself is at fault, then Sai will and she should. We have to put ourselves in the position of the girl to understand her.

Just because it is his house and he once financed her, does it mean that everything will be seen as her staying back for the sake of money or is staying back because she needs someone for her support since she is an orphan? That is not true, if it was anyone else in the place of Virat, Sai wouldn't have stayed back whether she has anyone with her or not, whether she has to stay alone or not.

laksh

Awesome post. Wonderful way to present the conflict of emotions felt by both of them. Just wow!

Why did Sai marry Virat with his condition. An orphaned 18 year old sought by a political gunda, decides to take her own life, but saved by a man who had committed to her dying father to take her responsibility upon his demise. Everyone around her say that the only possible outcome is marriage. The other option was to get monetary support and make him her guardian, I don’t think our society is yet to view such noble notion as such, but tag the girl otherwise.

Here is this man in good authority, known to honor his commitments telling her he shall marry her and be her guardian and roommate until she becomes a doctor. She might have thought it was a better choice, given her emotional trauma and literally no one to support. Would she have anticipated this roommate cum guardian to be this dashing, caring and supportive?Now the poor thing she has conflicting feelings for him?