Hello Amazing People
Hope you all doing well. I am too sleepy right now, hence I will keep my message very short. Chapter 19 has been divided into two parts for it was getting too long, secondaly, I had completed this one while the other one still needs some work.
By the time you finish reading this one, next one will follow real soon.
Disclaimer- chapter 19A and 19B focus more on Prerna.. so request you all to please bear with me, in case you don't prefer reading her much. I will completly understand even if you decide to skip as we all how much we all love show wali Prerna 
Thank you for reading in advance. I said I'd keep it short fir bhi 
Love
Sunshine
CHAPTER 20
JUHU HOTEL, MUMBAI
Same night (Tues), 9.15 PM
Prerna reached the hotel room and sat on the couch in the common area. Her phone buzzed several times, Aditya had been trying to reach her. Neither she could gather enough courage to talk to him, nor was she in a state of mind to speak to anyone. All she wanted to do was stand under the shower and cry to let go off this weight that she felt inside her heart. After she deliberately missed all his calls, her phone went silent and she heard a knock on the door. When she didn't open, someone slid a slip inside from under the door.
'Message from Mr. Aditya Adhiraj- please call him when you can'
She read and left it on the coffee table in the living area and walked towards the bedroom. She sat on her bed lost in her thoughts. After a while her phone buzzed again, she received a message from Aditya-
'Are you okay Prerna? I have been trying to reach you for so long. I called hotel staff but you didn't open the door. I hope you are fine?'
She read the message from the notification tab and kept her phone back on the side table. She removed her night's change from the cupboard and before she reached the washroom, her phone buzzed again. Another message from Aditya-
'You know it didn't go as I hoped it to be. I was waiting for you at the office but you never came. I am worried Prerna, hope you are okay? Please leave a message or call when you can. See you in the morning'
Prerna read the message but didn't reply. She had heard and seen so much that she was still in a state of shock. Some of it made sense but most part felt like a complicated maze. Prerna went inside the washroom and stood under the shower, hoping to wash off the confusion and the unknown fear of losing something precious, that made home inside her since she stepped out of the office building.
She turned the shower on and closed her eyes letting cold drops of water fall on her face. A shiver wave ran across her body at the first contact of cold water, but after a while she found it calming. Her mind was still occupied with events from the evening. Cold water droplets trickled down her face, but she could feel warmth around her eyes. She knew she was crying, but why? What for? Were these tears of happiness that she met people she had been wanting to meet for so long? OR these were tears of sorrow because she lost them again, this time for forever may be?
'NAHI BHI MILENGE TO BHI KYA?' She screamed, hitting the wall in front inc frustration.
'You happily let them exit your life months ago, so why all this now? Didn't you pray everyday to be with Anurag? Didn't you know Kukki won't be your daughter when she stepped out of your life? You knew it all. Then why act like you care, because you never did back then. Aren't you feeling this just because Anurag is not around you! If some miracle happens and Anurag is back, wouldn't you choose him over them again? Wouldn't YOU?'
Prerna shut her eyes tight and covered her ears when she could no more fight this battle going on inside her brain.
Soon her confusion and fear were replaced by the burden of guilt. She failed to understand her own feelings. Meeting Rishabh and Kukki under such extraordinary circumstances wasn't what she had expected anyway.
'Is it affecting me more because of Menaka?" she thought.
Prerna was so lost in her thoughts that she forgot how much time she had spent under the cold shower. Her body was shivering a bit because of the cold. Turning the shower off, she quickly covered herself with the bathrobe and changed into her night PJs. As soon as she came out, cold air in the room hit her again. Shivering and shaking a little she slipped inside her blanket and increased the room temperature.
She laid in her bed, but Kukki's sleeping face and flashes of Rishabh and his interactions with Menaka and Aditya hit her every time she tried to close her eyes. Everything from seeing Menaka on the doorstep of Aditya's cabin, Rishabh's first image of him standing at the half open door to Kukki's face moving away from her, came alive, making it hard for her to sleep.
"Menaka clearly seems to love both Kukki and Mr. Bajaj but what mistake did she do, that led Mr. Bajaj to say all the things to her that he did. I have never seen him so broken and angry at the same time. He clearly didn't seem to tolerate her presence" several thoughts crossed Prerna's mind as she continuously tossed in her bed, sleep far away from her eyes.
Prerna felt an urge to talk to her mother and reached out to her phone. But when she realised it was past 2 am, she dropped the idea. As she kept her phone near the pillow, her hands touched the object that she was used to keeping closest to herself, every single night- the family picture frame. She turned on her side and placed the frame on the bed in front of her eyes.
As She caressed Kukki's picture, her eyes welled up again. She slowly slid her fingers on Rishabh's picture, his head rested over Kukki's, smile on his face so rare; only his daughter could bring out that side of his. Then she looked at her own picture, hugging Kukki from behind. She slowly moved her fingers over her own picture and covered it completely with the hand, staring at Mr. Bajaj and Kukki without her being in the frame.
Tears escaped from the corner of her eyes, experiencing emotions, she never knew she could ever feel for these two. Keeping the frame upside down on the bed she turned to the other side and dug her face deep into her pillow, crying till she slept.
NEXT MORNING (WED)
10.30 AM
Prerna felt, someone was drilling into a rock right next to her. Her head felt heavy, and a sharp noise made it worse. Forcing herself, she opened her eyes and realised, landline had been ringing continuously right next to her bed. As she focused more she heard loud knocks on the door outside.
She turned and reached for the landline and heard a frantic voice on the other end of the line.
"Prerna Mam, are you okay? We have been calling you for the past 10 minutes. Mr. Adhiraj is here. Please talk to him"
Prerna checked her phone for time and noticed Aditya's missed calls.
"Prerna? All okay?" asked Aditya, concerned for her.
"I am fine. I am so sorry I overslept. I will be down in 20 mins"
"Thank God.. you had me worried. Take your time, I am waiting downstairs"
"I am coming" Prerna put the receiver down and dragged herself out of the bed. After a quick shower she reached the restaurant where Aditya was waiting for her. She took a few weak steps towards him and sat in front of him.
"Hello Aditya.." she said in a weak voice.
"Prerna.. where have you been.. Why weren't you taking my calls?" Aditya bombarded his question.
"I am sorry.. I was just.." said Prerna.
"Are you okay? You look.. unwell?" asked Aditya, looking at her dull and tired face. She did not look like any other day.
"I am fine… just a bit tired." she said, drinking tea to soothe the throbbing pain in her head.
"Are you sure? You can take a day off if you want to. You look tired" said Aditya.
"No, I am fine. Don't worry. Let's go for the meeting, all teachers must be waiting for us, maine already itna late kar diya hai" Prerna smiled to convince him that she was fine.
"Okay, finish your food and we will leave then" said Aditya pointing towards her untouched plate.
"I am done, let's just go. Abhi I am not hungry. I will have something at the meeting venue" she got up and Aditya followed.
-------
"Btw I was waiting for you at the office yesterday. Why didn't you come?" asked Aditya while they waited at the signal.
Prerna looked away from him and said "I was late, Jab main waha phonchi tab waha koi tha hi nahi. I was too tired because of the traffic isliye hotel phonchte hi I slept." Prerna looked on the other side and wiped away her tear.
"Ohh that explains why you didn't pick up my call. I got so worried you know" said Aditya, changing the gear.
"I am sorry again.. I should have at least messaged you" said Prerna feeling guilty of her actions.
"You should be.. you got me scared.." said Aditya faking his anger.
"By the way Prerna, we are at Wednesday today, what have you thought of my offer for the permanent position with AMRA? Like I said earlier, you are free to decide either way, though I personally would love it if you stayed."
"Woo.. maine ab tak…"
"Tumne ab tak socha nahi hai. That's great, iska matlab ab bhi 50% chances hai that you'd stay back" Aditya looked at her with a childish grin on his face and he brought the car to a halt.
They both came out of the car and Prerna said "That's height of optimism Aditya"
Aditya couldn't stop smiling and he replied "I have spent a long time of my life being pessimistic and negative, now I only want to be positive… How is the plan?" He looked at her playfully.
"Plan is good" said Prerna as they entered the school building holding her files close to her chest, thinking about Aditya's question that she had completely forgotten about.
"I need to take a call soon.. there isn't much time left. Just in case I decide to go back, I will have to hand over work to someone else.." she thought while climbing the stairs following Aditya who was busy talking to a school staff.
"Prerna.. I forgot to tell you. I want you to go to the office today at around 5.30 or six, our office team has worked on some estimates and I want you to sit with them once, to see if everything fits in as needed. I know aaj thoda kaam zyada ho jayega but now that I am unsure of your presence next week, I have no option. I have a meeting in the evening, so I won't be able to join. Hope it's okay with you" asked Aditya while they took their seats in a moderately sized staff room.
"Not an issue.. I will go.." said Prerna. As teachers flooded the small space, Prerna was worried of meeting any known person at the office.
BI/AMRA HQ
7.30 PM
Almost everyone had left from the office and Prerna was amongst the last couple of AMRA employees. Prerna was relieved to have not met anyone in past two hours, she wasn't ready to face. After finishing her work she picked up her bag, when Aditya called her.
"Hey Prerna, are you still in office?"
"Yes.."
"Great, I need a favour. I left a file at the office, very important for tomorrow's discussions. Could you carry it with you, nhi to subah office visit karna padega before meeting"
While talking over phone Prerna walked to his cabin to check for the file. "Is it on your table?" She asked.
"No, it's on the 23rd floor. Desk 4, CSR dept. Take a left when you exit the lift" Prerna stopped in tracks and her heart skipped a beat as she heard floor 23rd. She recalled Aditya had taken her up there to meet his friend, who was none other than Mr. Bajaj.
"Hello Prerna, are you there?"
Prerna focused back on his voice and reluctantly she asked "it is that important?"
"Yes Prerna it has all the budget figures proposed by BI, I forgot it there in a hurry while discussing it with Tanvi, she is heading the project from BI's end"
Prerna's heart felt another jolt as she heard Tanvi's name and she took a deep sigh.
"Prerna hurry before they lockdown the office" said Aditya, with a sense of urgency.
"Ohh okay.. I will check.."
Prerna disconnected the call and hesitatingly walked towards the lift hoping that she wouldn't find any familiar face up there.
'I have to check for the file at Tanvi's workstation. What if she is there too?" Lost in her thought Prerna didn't realise when she had reached at 23rd floor.
She exited the lift on the 23rd floor and looked around. To her relief the place was almost deserted and dark like AMRA workfloor was the day before. She turned left like Aditya mentioned and manouvered through different departments marked with illuminated sign boards above. She looked for the sign board of the CSR department.
She reached the area and looked for desk 4, there she found the file she came looking for.
'So this where Tanvi works from' she thought looking at Tanvi's name on the soft board.
She picked up the file and wanted to quickly go back to lift. But when she found no one there she gave a look around and found the space way bigger than AMRA workfloor. Even under the dim lights of sign boards she could guess how huge the place was. Most of it was open workspace except a few glass cabins. Some of the cabins still had lights on. That's when she noticed the name "Rishabh Bajaj" illuminating outside one of those cabins. Just the name, no designation, no position.
"Who needs a position on a plate when the name in itself is a position that any business person would dream of" she chuckled. She looked further and that's when she noticed his chair move in his cabin.
Prerna sat down on a chair behind her to hide herself behind a computer screen. Rishabh turned back in chair, and got up with Kukki in his arms.
"Oh my God, Mr. Bajaj is still here. What if he sees me here, what am I going to tell him?" she thought, droplets of sweat forming over her forehead.
Kukki showed him a paper that looked like a drawing sheet while he was shuffling his focus between her and the phone call on his bluetooth headset. Kukki put her sheet in front of his face. He took it and gave it a look. He raised his brows and with his hand he gestured "its really nice"
Prerna remembered how they communicated with her with sign language.
Kukki had a sleepy smile on her face and took her sheet back.
Prerna looked at the two with her head rested on her hand and a smile crossed her lips when she looked at how Kukki was on the verge of falling asleep on his shoulder while Rishabh was busy on the call. Prerna knew she was asleep, when the sheet she held fell off her hand. Rishabh picked up the paper and smiled looking at it. He folded the paper and kept it inside his pocket. He kissed Kukki and slowly patted her back, talking over the phone while pacing across the room, fiddling with his laptop in between.
Prerna hid herself further when she heard the lift doors open and her eyes followed the figure of a lady taking fast steps towards the cabin. Only when the lady reached his cabin and the light fell on her, she realised it was Tanvi.
Prerna looked at Tanvi who hurriedly kept her bag on the chair. Rishabh quzizzically looked at her and showed her his watch. Tanvi touched her ears and with an apologetic face she said a few words. Prerna didn't have to think much to know that she was apologising for being late.
She said something and took Kukki from Rishabh and made her lie on a couch nearby.
Inside the cabin, Tanvi took some papers out of her bag and showed those to Rishabh. "I got this done, one more contributor on board for AMRA?"
While Rishabh was fully engrossed in reading the papers, Tanvi pulled out one of the drawers.
Prerna curiously looked at Tanvi because now she stood with both her hands on her waist, her stance more authoritative and somewhat frustrated look on her face. Tanvi said something and Rishabh quietly extended his left hand towards her, still busy studying the papers in his other hand. She kept some pills on his hand and picked up a glass of water from the table. He gulped it with water and Tanvi moved to Kukki, peacefully sleeping on the couch.
''He is still on meds it seems" Prerna recollected the incident from the hotel, when she had unknowingly sent antacids for the mysterious guest who was none other than the man standing in front of her.
Rishabh kept the papers on the table and Tanvi stood up.
"That's good work Tanvi, the terms of agreement and proposed plans are pretty interesting. Aditya will be very happy with this" said Rishabh with a proud smile and gave her a side hug.
Though Prerna couldn't hear anything, she knew Tanvi had done something that he was happy, rather proud of.
"They look so comfortable and at ease with each other unlike Basu Badi. So much has changed in the past few months" Prerna thought.
Inside the cabin, Rishabh received Masi's call.
"Had been waiting for Tanvi, Masi, we are leaving.."
After a brief moment of silence, he came out of the cabin and he spoke again, with a bit of frustration this time.
"Masi why do you talk to her I don't understand. Can we please not discuss anything about her" Rishabh said, rubbing his forehead with irritation.
Prerna slid down her chair and hid under the desk, not taking any chances for either of them to see her.
"Masi let's talk later. We are anyway heading for home"
Rishabh stood leaning to a desk and spoke in a low voice. "Masi.. you need to stop talking to Menaka.. I am not letting her in mine or my daughter's life, that's about it. Rather I am not letting anyone in my daughter's life. I made a huge mistake jab Prerna ko Kukki ki Mom banake laya. And see kya hua??"
He removed Kukki's drawing from his pocket and unfolded it to look at it. "She is still drawing pictures of her Prerna Mom and a happy family. Someytimes calling her name in sleep. I don't say anything to her because I am hoping with time she will realise that her Prerna Mom is not coming back. I can't snatch her smile telling her, uski Prerna Mom ki ab apni life hai, apni family hai, moreover she must be a mother herself by now. I can't do this again with my daughter and Menaka to kabhi nahi"
Rishabh heard Masi and spoke again in a defeated voice "I have come to terms with the fact that like me, maybe Kukki's life will also be devoid of a mother's love and care. But unlike me she has her father by her side. So Do we have to make things more difficult for her and me, do we? Isliye Masi I request you to please stop being in her with contact. And agar aap usse baat karna chahte hai to kijiye but mujhse discuss mat kijiye. Because galti intetional thi ya unintentional I am not letting her around my girl. See you home" he said firmly and disconnected the call and walked towards his cabin.
"Tanvi, take your stuff we are leaving" Rishabh picked up Kukki and walked out of the cabin, Tanvi followed him with her bag, a bit confused with sudden change in his demeanor.
As they walked towards the lift Rishabh abruptly turned and Tanvi almost collided with him.
"Us desk pr jo paper hai please take that" said Rishabh and took quick steps ahead.
Tanvi looked at the desk Rishabh pointed out at and carelessly put the paper in the outside pocket of her bag, running after Rishabh who stood holding lift doors for her.
Each word Prerna heard felt like someone stabbed her repeatedly without showing any mercy. Prerna sat on the ground drowning in guilt. She dragged her knees close to her chest and rested her head. "No Mr. Bajaj.. Prerna ki nayi life zarur shuru ho gayi hai but waise nahin jaisa aap soch rahe hain. Meri khud ki family ke siwa koi aur family nahi hai.. And there is no child Mr. Bajaj, there is no child.. I lost my baby, I couldn't even mourn the loss.. kisi ko pata bhi nahi wo life exist bhi karti thi.. aapko uske baare mein sabse pehle pata tha.. aur is puri duniya mein sirf Anurag aur aapko hi…" Prerna hid her face in her arms on her knees.
"Aapne sahi kaha, I have cheated Kukki as a mother. Na Kukki ki Mom ban saki na hi apne bacche ki.. dono ko kho diya maine"
Prerna somehow gathered herself and walked towards the lift. As she waited for the lift, her gaze fell on the piece of paper that laid near her feet. She picked it up and her heart broke several times in that moment. It was Kukki's drawing with all three of them. Little Kukki in between holding hands of her parents on either side. She came down on her knees when she read 'Prerna Mom' written in one of the clouds she had drawn above everyone's head in the drawing. She pressed the paper to her chest and cried repeating "I am so sorry baby. Prerna Mamma is very sorryy". She held her head down and cried her heart out sitting outside the lift.
JUHU HOTEL
9.45 PM
As soon as Prerna entered her room, she carelessly dropped all her stuff on the floor except the sheet of paper she had refused to leave, the entire way back to her hotel. She ran towards her room and dropped on her bed and dug her face deep into the mattress tightly clutching the bed sheet in one hand and Kukki's drawing in the other one.
"Why.. why..why with me.. I lost everything in life because of my own decisions.. even both my kids.. what do I have now? Nothing.. why???" she continuously hit on the bed, frustrated with herself and her life.
Part 21- Page 54 https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/153112387
Link to other stories-
I AM HOME (One Shot)- completed
https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/153085293
THE MIRROR (Two Chapters)- completed
https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152168455
EPIPHANY (5 chapters)- Completed
https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/152039413
Indian Mythology
Hindi TV Shows
Cricket
