Aahatein | One Shot
Six months later...
Choti Choti Baatein, Yuhi Aaate Jaate
Yaadein Sehlaake Jaati Hain
Raaton Ko Sirhaane, Baasi Muskaane
Mujhko Sulaake Jaati Hai
Milna Nahin Hai Mumkin, Itna Batao Lekin
Hum Phir Mile Kyun Hain
Tujhko Bhulaana Paaun, Tujhko Bhulaana Paaun
Yeh Silsile Kyun Hain
Sab Kuch Wahi Hai, Par Kuch Kami Hai
Teri Aahatein Nahin Hai
Sab Kuch Wahi Hai, Par Kuch Kami Hai
Teri Aahatein Nahin Hai, Nahin Hai
I'm sitting on the couch in my room trying to concentrate on the file in front of me. Trying being the operative word. The truth is I haven't been able to give my hundred per cent to anything. Be it with my work, at home or with the few friends that I have.
Everything seems insignificant these days.
The days always seem to drag and the nights are not long enough but that is the one time I look forward to the most. This is the only time when there are no pretences when I am left alone with my thoughts.
I don't have to pretend that I am fine.
I don't have to pretend that I am happy with her decision.
I don't have to pretend that each passing day isn't killing me. Slowly.
Every morning when I wake, for a few seconds I forget my reality when my hand stretches towards the right side of the bed only to be met with cold, untouched sheets and everything comes rushing back like a freight train, taking my breath away.
The only thing that I own, that nobody can take away from me are my memories. They are the only thing that keeps me moving, that gives me solace.
I can't meet her.
I can't see her.
I can't call her.
I can't hear her.
I can't hold her.
I miss her.
Every day is the same and every night is the same, the only thing that is not the same is her missing presence.
Her colourful clothes are no longer beside my monochrome clothes.
Her meagre collection of jewellery no longer adorns the dressing table.
Her scent disappeared after a few days she left, from the room and the sheets.
There is no evidence that she ever lived here, even for a brief moment. It's like she doesn't exist in my life anymore.
And that makes my chest hurt.
X-X-X
"And the Young Entrepreneur Award goes to Ms Suman Malhotra!" The emcee called out.
Amongst the thunderous applause walked a woman in a blush-coloured gown, flowing as she walked as if it were a part of her. Her hair was pulled up in a low bun on the side, a few loose tendrils artfully framing her face, her ears adorned with simple diamond studs, the most expensive thing she owned. At least in monetary value.
"Simple and elegant" that were the two words that would come to mind as she walked up to the stage, standing tall with a radiant smile on her face ecstatic to be receiving the prestigious award, but her eyes told a different story.
"Mrs Malhotra, a few words?"
"Thank you," she said softly into the mic as the applause died down. Her voice no longer held that authoritative tone.
"This award has my name on and it is true that this business started as a one-woman army but behind every successful woman there is a group of people, family and friends, that were there to support her and I have been lucky to have found such support. Over the years, the one-woman army has had a lot of people join in and help me reach where I am today.
When I started out my grandfather told me something that resonated with me. He said 'It takes a village to build something, a tribe. So find your tribe, your people and once you find them never let them go.' Suffice to say I followed his advice, at least in my business " she teased and laughter rose in the audience quieting down just as quickly to hear her speak more " and I found my tribe in my employees, my grandfather and my best friend cum brother-in-law Pushkar.
They aren't present here today because I told them not to come but I know when I go back they will be there, with all the pomp and circus to celebrate with me. So a thank you to every single person who has been a driving force, negative or positive, otherwise, I wouldn't be able to stand here. Oh, also find your tribe."
Handing the mic back to the emcee and giving a smile to the people on stage and the audience, she walked down and away from the stage at the sound of applause and out the room once the emcee started to announce the next award.
X-X-X
I am driving back home, my award riding shotgun, with the radio on playing recent favourite and most my played song: Aahatein.
Maine Nahin Jaana, Tune Nahin Jaana
Jaane Anjaane Jo Hua
Kuch Toh Hua Jo, Mujhko Hua Na
Tujhko Magar Kyun Hua
Galti Nahin Hai Teri, Galti Nahin Hai Meri
Phir Bhi Gile Kyun Hain
Tujhko Bhulaana Paaun, Tujhko Bhulaana Paaun
Yeh Silsile Kyun Hain
Sab Kuch Wahi Hai Wahi Hai, Par Kuch Kami Hai Kami Hai
Teri Aahatein Nahin Hai
It's been six months since I decided to walk out of Malhotra Mansion.
Six months since I asked him to give me time.
Six months since I last spoke to him.
Six months since I last heard his voice.
Six months since I last saw his face.
I haven't spoken to anyone form the Malhotra Mansion except Pushkar and Preeti and even with them, the communication has been at the minimum. Haven't even really been or even in the vicinity of the house that was the beginning of the end.
As for not seeing him, I take great measures to not come and go at the same time as him since he opened a separate firm just opposite of PCT. It takes a lot of control to stop myself from looking out the door just to catch a glimpse of him.
The day I asked him for space was the day I broke both our hearts, willingly, yet I have complaints; but after those complaints come a wave of understanding and acceptance, that this was needed, for me if not for him.
The fights, the games, the ploys they had become too much and we had become a product of our families prejudices, his father's hate, his pride and inability to trust me and my pride and inability to speak up until it was too late.
He wasn't at fault.
I wasn't at fault.
No one was at fault.
It was our fate, our circumstances that were at fault.
He is the kind of person who once entered your life, made a place for himself and considered you family, it was hard to forget him, no matter what he did.
He is ingrained in my bones. His very essence is ingrained in my past and present and who knows maybe even my future.
Everything is the same. The only thing that is missing is my best friend. I guess everything is the same, just like it was for 10 years.
He is not here anymore and there are days when I crave for his presence more than anything.
But I can't.
Because I was the one who put us here.
.
.
.
.
Maybe someday, we will be enough for ourselves. For each other.
.
.
.
.
.
Or maybe not.
Teri Aahatein Nahin Hai
Kyun Nahin Hai
X-X-X
This one has been a long time coming and at last the creative juices FINALLY started flowing and I had this write up done in two hours. Before I jump into anything else...
Sal a.k.a KitkitMkb, my impatient little child, here you have it and I hope it lived somewhat to your expectations. Your constant pressing and comments to write this piece was literally the highlight and had me laughing my ass off.
Anyway, this writing style for this one-shot is completely different to anything I've written before and I hope you've liked it.
Until the next story...
xo
Mangal Lakshmi
