How many of you liked Minnie’s reply to Mita Today? - Page 4

Originally posted by: deefy89

i think shes wrong to feel that... ashok abandoned both her and her mother long before he met meeta. its easy to blame the stranger but the fact is that ashok has never been a good husband nor good father. lets not forget he left for london months after marrying and didnt insist babita go with him, nor thought to return or force her to move when mini was born. babitas suffering started the moment he left her and from there only got worse.

Right now both mother and daughter are overwhelmed by anger, insecurity, and general frustration with things. On top of that they can't completely cut themselves off from the Khuranas so the wounds don't get a chance to heal. If they had moved to another city far from these people, it would have been easier but every other day something happens with the Khurana's and mother-daughter somehow get dragged into it eventually.

Minnie is starting to realized that her papaji is a jerk to everyone. Like her mother, she too must have wondered what attracted Ashok to Meeta, but after what she saw Ashok do to her she now feels he doesn't love his second wife either. So what was all that disruption and grief in their life for? To see her father humiliate yet another woman the same way? She's now conflicted by her sympathy for Meeta as a woman, versus her hatred for her as the other woman. She's feeling guilty for caring for Meeta on some level, because it makes her feel as if she is betraying her Babes.

The other woman doesn't have to be evil, and that is what the CVs are trying to show us. I agree with Beeji that Meeta needs to give Minnie some space. I think now that she is pregnant, her maternal feelings are coming to the fore, so she is being extra attentive towards Minnie, which has backfired, of course.

We would prefer Babes and Minnie to behave in certain ways but the beauty of this show is that the characters are flawed and don't behave in idealistic ways. Rather, they are realistic and act based on their emotions, rather than pure logic. I love how the writers show conflict at various levels in people's lives and all these complex emotions that kids of divorced parents go through. Things are not always black and white in real life, and we are now starting to see other shades of gray.

But what I don't get is why people do not understand that the Marriage was doomed from the beginning and more so when he went to London and even after Mini's birth he asked them to join him or his Parents to sent them to London to be with him.

I repeat again. Babita too is to blame for the failure of her Marriage, like I said before its take 2 people in the Marriage to clap not 1. She was too busy playing the ideal Bhua that her Marriage and Husband just slipped away. Also how can any blame the other woman if the Marriage was long dead anyway. They were strangers meeting each other when he returned. I just don't get it.

Its not shown what Ashok did in London from the time that he left and meet Mita 10 years ago. Would be interesting, as it would raise questions was there another Lady before Mita.

Its not right to keep on blaming Mita when in theory he had left Babita long before Mita arrived in the picture.

What if he had Mita in Patiala when they were a happy family, that I can understand but this no I don't.

How can you blame Mita when the Marriage was long finished before she arrived in the picture.

How can you call it a Marriage when Husband/Wife and Father/Daughter were strangers to each other and had no family life is beyond me.

Or is it the typical Indian mentality to blame the other Woman before looking at facts etc.

CRAZY,..

Meeta is only a symptom. The real problem lies elsewhere. I would blame Ashok the most because he could have divorced Babita and moved on with Meeta if he wanted to. 10 years is a long time to be carrying out an EMA.

Babita may have been married off when she was 18, young and naive. Her social conditioning made her subservient but as she became older, especially as she reached her mid to late 20s, I wonder: did she not long for Ashok and want more affection? She held on to an illusion of affection from his side but in 17 years she must have known after a point that something was off, and that this was not what marriage was supposed to be, especially after seeing the bond between her parents-in-law or Lovely and Sukhi. The fact that she glossed over things and presented a rosy picture of Ashok and her "love story" to Minnie shows that she was in denial and deep down knew that this was not a proper marriage.

I still remember the look of fascination on Babita's face when she first heard Hanuman talking about meeting and falling in love with Imarti, that it is possible for such a deep connection to exist, as though she had discovered a completely new facet of the institution of marriage. Even today she continues to be in awe of his love for his late wife, that such a thing is possible because it is worlds apart from what she had ever experienced in her "marriage".

Ashok returned after 5 years this time. Perhaps Babita thought he couldn't afford to visit more often. With all this technology, he could have easily stayed in touch with Minnie and her but when he arrived there was all this awkwardness between them that anyone would have sensed. There's no way you have that after 17 years, long-distance or not.

I really really hope the CVs explore this area a little more because until Babita learns to acknowledge this and let go of the residual pain, she will not be able to heal and truly move on. Babita is a victim but her conditioning is largely to blame for not thinking of herself and her own happiness.

Originally posted by: guddi01

But what I don't get is why people do not understand that the Marriage was doomed from the beginning and more so when he went to London and even after Mini's birth he asked them to join him or his Parents to sent them to London to be with him.

I repeat again. Babita too is to blame for the failure of her Marriage, like I said before its take 2 people in the Marriage to clap not 1. She was too busy playing the ideal Bhua that her Marriage and Husband just slipped away. Also how can any blame the other woman if the Marriage was long dead anyway. They were strangers meeting each other when he returned. I just don't get it.

Its not shown what Ashok did in London from the time that he left and meet Mita 10 years ago. Would be interesting, as it would raise questions was there another Lady before Mita.

Its not right to keep on blaming Mita when in theory he had left Babita long before Mita arrived in the picture.

What if he had Mita in Patiala when they were a happy family, that I can understand but this no I don't.

How can you blame Mita when the Marriage was long finished before she arrived in the picture.

How can you call it a Marriage when Husband/Wife and Father/Daughter were strangers to each other and had no family life is beyond me.

Or is it the typical Indian mentality to blame the other Woman before looking at facts etc.

CRAZY,..

Sorry to barge in - I barely write here in this forum but I loved this reply so much that I felt the need to walk in uninvited. I agree to all the above.

Actually Babita should be thankful to Meeta. it is true that at current point Babita feels humiliated and abandoned but actually Meeta did her a favor. Otherwise Babita would have sucked it up and lived in the loveless marriage for rest of her life. Babita seems to have no good memories of her marriage - she was impregnated and was left behind to serve her in-laws. As bitter as it has been for Babita, the divorce was a blessing in disguise for her. It forced her to take the drastic step that otherwise women of India and similar culture would never take. It made her walk out of a bad marriage and rediscover herself. What is better than that?

Currently Babita probably consistently compares herself to Meeta, her ego is hurt (not her feelings but her ego) and her insecurities make her lash out to Meeta. But when she is strong enough to stand above these feelings, both hers & Mini's resentment will subside too.