Posted:
Before commenting on his feelings for puchki, I do want to say that I do feel bad for shaan, as he has nobody who loves him unconditionally or whom he can share his feelings with. Puchki in the truest sense is the only person who would love him unconditionally and whom he could talk to, but he knows he can't because of the prejudice that his new family have for her and her sonagachi background, so he can't keep any relations with puchki out of fear that he will be rejected by majumdars, whose love and acceptance he craves for.
Everybody else in the majumdar family either hate him or have high expectations from him but don't understand or care to understand what he feels and think about his happiness, such as ridoy and ravindra. Both show love for shaan and appear to put him on a pedestal as this ideal person and respect him, however both also don't seem to understand him, have high expectations from him and never sit to get to know what he thinks and feels and what he wants. Ravindra himself I don't trust because if I recall (although I may be wrong considering I want an active viewer pre-leap) that ravindra said that ridoy was his true heir or something like that before he got to know about his disability and I remember him being neglectful of shaan in the hospital when ridoy was born. I feel now ravindra only shows love for shaan because of ridoy's limps and he sees shaan as more able and capable than ridoy to be the majumdar heir. Whilst ridoy on the other hand just throws tantrums and expects shaan to think about him all the time and fulfill his needs and desires. So you guys see how in this new family, shaan has no one who he can share his feelings with and whom will care about what he wants? Puchki is the only one who can understand him and who will without any judgement listen to him and think about his happiness.
Now, coming to his feelings for puchki, he recognises there is an incomprehensible attraction he feels towards her, and he knows given his time with her in childhood and the type of friendship he had with her that he is still concerned about her safety and happiness, but he knows that he can't even be friends with her because of his family, and to a certain extent he would rather her be away from him and happy rather than get in trouble and hurt to his family. There's also his jealousy that he isn't able to come to terms with and recognise.
Anupamaa
Tu Juliet Jatt Di
