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Chapter 8 last part
" Raj i vnt thanked u never before fr wat u ve done fr us. U dnt knw hw my life was till u entered . i vl tell u the truth raj i never knew about ur existence till neha came . i ve seen u vth ma, ve cme across u a many tmes n oir falt area but i was n a numb state then raj i didnt know wat was gng around me . i lived n a trance... I was livingg a mechanical life till neha entered me it was neha who brought me back to my life but t was u who taught me to live. I thought just i was enough fr my neha butvu proved me wrong. I never knew hw much neha missed till u steped in. I thought i am very strong to live alone but u showed me prescence f smeone like u can nly make me stronger. Ibwas afraid fr libing life a second chance but u came like an angel nd showed me the path. U hold my fingers like a father wen i was taking baby steps to life. U were lyk a big brother protecting me wen i felt insecure. U were like a mother hen wen u shielded me frm all those eagles who were tryng to dig my past. U were lyk a obsessive lover wen u became possessive abt me. A son wen u asked fr my attention. U gave me all rhe relation tat i had lost once r never had bfr. I never doubt ur love fr neha nd i am nt gng to thank u fr wat u did fr her coz u r her father nd u nd i believe u r supposed to do it coz neha too gave u the love f a father. But i need to thank u fr wat u dis fr me coz i bever reciprocated the love u showered on me raj. I was so lost n the past tat i geel tat i insulted ur love. I am sorry fr all those days raj .fr ignoring u. Fr nt taking care f u. Fr taking u fr granted
Fr mt acknowledging ur love. Nd mostly fr nt admitting to ubtat i ve fallen n love vth u too. I was afraid to let u knw raj bt as always u understood v neber needed words to knw eachother. Thank you fr this baby raj thanku fr letting me go through wat i missed on nehas journey."
" i love u till eternity. I want to live nd die n ur..."
I didnt let her complete nd sealed her lips vth mine.
"Where is neha" i asked n between the kiss
" slept vth ma usual aftrnoon nap"
" good, i dnt want any interruptions, i dnt thnk i can wait till night, i want u now" and i again sealed my lips vth her nd lifted her n my arms vth out breaking the kiss to take her to a world of our own to get lost n eachother. To forget all tge insecurities...to love her till eternity...
End of rajs monologue
Back to kunal
" i am happy that mauli s happy
But am i really happy fr mauli? No i am nt i despise the fact my daughter called me uncle nd that raj as papa. I hated the fact that raj s taking care f my ma mre rhan i ever did nd ma cared fr him too like he did fr me once. I hated the fact that i no longer affects mauli. Her indifference hurted my ego even anger would ve been fine bt nt this indifference. . i know i dnt deserve any forgiveness nr i could hold any hope on t nw but still t all hurts me"
After talking vth ma i understood one thng that ma holds herself responsible fr wat i did to mauli. Which forced me to thnk sme aspects i never thought.
Wen i complained abt nandini being an incompetent wife she laughed and said me
" kunal u remembered me an incident. Once thwre was a boy who had tge worlds best unique toy vtg him once wen he was gng nfrnt f a shop he saw a new toy which was wrapped beautifully n a pack nd looked so beautiful the boy immediately looled at his toy nd the new toy n shop He asked fr the new toy den his mother told him hw gud a toy he has n hands but boy was nt ready to hear t nd cried fr the new toy . wen he gt the new toy he immediately discarded his new toy nd went to home vth new toy but upon opening the wrap nd playing vth t smetme he gt to knw the new toy had nothng beyond ts beauty. He longed fr the ild toy nd went to his mom crying agaon telling thee new toy s of bad quality"
Now i knw who she referred as the boy, new nd old toy too.
Wen i was small ma nd dida took gr8 care f me. Ma never shpwed me any difficulty she ever faced she nd dida always made sure tat i receive everythng i asked fr. Wen i grew up mauli came to my life she was also lyk ma she too never let me knw ny problems n life she always took care f evythng even wen i resigned she never questionoed me Hw could i resign isnt t my responsibility to take care f my home finance too dnt i ve any responsibility towards the patients i treat at hospital? Nothng instead she took tat too on her shoulders. I gave her an excuse f my dream she never complained wen she saw me wasting time rather than working fr my dream she took the responsibility f fulfilling my dreams too on her shoulders
I understood i was aleays that stupid jerk who never took any responsibility . i let others to take all responsibility tat o had to
Always. I wanted to a hassle free life free drom responsibilities. Wen i was vth mauli i always had this feeling that she s overdoing everythngb nd s Superior to me. Mauli was nevwr depndant on me.den camE nandini t9 whom i was attracted physically first. Sshe was always submisssive. She made me my world where as mauli made a world vth me nd my loved ones i wasnt Her maulis first priority she made priorities according to situatn where as fr nandini i was the first nd last priority. Mauli never needed my advice wher as nandini couldnt do nythng vth out me. Fr the first tme i saw sme1 confining n me sme1 who thought i am strong sme one who beliwved i can be their world. Which attracted me like a moth to nandinii Nly to be burned nd die which i understood nly aftr the flames rouched me. It wasnt nandini who s incompetent t was me whi couldnt be a man enough to unserstand my follies to accept my faults to correct my mistakes. May be ts tme to start drm scratch again...May be news that mauli moved on could bring peace n mine nd nandinis life..
Thanks to all who read nd supported. I stoped watching this show lpng back. Bt came to knw about kunaln doubting mauliS pregnancy from an article accidently that wen this idea camr to me nd thought f giving a closuree to the story...
CID
