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Much of the focus for the current track seems to be about Shivaay's atonement...a daily scorecard seems to be maintained about whether he has done enough, whether Anika has given him enough of a cold shoulder, how she must remain "strong", how he must grovel far more daily to "earn forgiveness".
For me, however, that is not where the substance lies right now...these are token things that seem to get flipped daily in this redux anyways. Just a week back, this Anika who was groveling for this shaadi to be accepted, crying over a broken MS now doesn't care about any MS or shaadi😆, and only now dwells on Shivaay calling her the R word...when he actually called her that that night in the mandir, she still ran after him pleading for him to accept the shaadi.
The strange delayed reactions of this Anika in this redux deffo lead to some disconnect. It takes her days to react to even super traumatic events and her personality shifts 180 degrees almost daily...lol today she seemed to be in the mood to show contempt for Shivaay so she finally let him have it😆
For me, the interesting moments come from the few instances where this Shivika are allowed to portray the depth of the emotion b/w them...the emotion that lies beyond the wounds, the scars, the hurt, the anger, the bitterness, the contempt, the remorse, the guilt. There is an emotion that supercedes all of that and surprisingly most ppl don't seem to see it or care for it while they are busy keeping score of how much more Shivaay needs to do to earn his maafi😆...it is not a generally "caring" nature, it is not "large heartedness" on Anika's part that makes her turn back to him even when she tries to walk away...it is this emotion that doesn't have a name in this redux yet but it's existed b/w Shivika since day one...an emotion that allows them to always reach out to each other instinctively no matter what transpires...there's gussa, there's hurt, there's bitterness...but there is a haq in all of that only possible cuz of this emotion.
Anika understandably feels bitter, hurt and even mocks him for how he can be so blind to the realities of what he inflicted upon her...Shivaay is either surprisingly naive or had his head buried in the sand all this while that he didn't know what calling someone his mistress would entail...lol suddenly today that word is piercing him after he so casually, viciously threw it on her face like that over and over again...all part of HS madam's character denigration spree...now meant to be gotten over easily😆 cuz chipku behen P is back and D has been disposed off magically😆.
Ah but I digress...getting back to what this scene was really about...a Shivaay facing some bitter truths and consequences of his words and actions, but wanting to find a solution as well...imploring, then insisting that she tell him what he can do to atone...LOL@ him saying he wants her life to go back to how it was before...Anika understandably is just tired of his drama and wants a break...lol...but he is desperate now...both for her maafi and for her to not stop talking to him...that was a nice throwback to the last time Shivaay was this desperate to get forgiveness from her and insisted that no matter, she not stop talking to him atleast...what a lovely scene that was.
Today however was about this Shivaay first having to experience atleast a semblance of the pain he put Anika through...filmy and lulzy as the whole scene was with him asking the goons to beat him up as Anika starts to walk away...what struck out to me was the way he was watching her throughout it...there wasn't just a plea for forgiveness in his eyes...but something more elemental...as if he was silently saying, try and leave now...I know you can't...how does he know this? It's cuz of that un-named emotion...Shivaay right now is like a lost child who is searching for his anchor which his heart tells him is only Anika.
Anika's tears as she turns back and sees him getting beaten up, again trying to harden herself to turn and walk away...lol but invariably turning back again to CHARGE at those goons suddenly threatening to call the cops on them😆😆...she didn't think of cops when they were harassing her two minutes back...but now she's suddenly screaming at them at top volume...many personalities in this one Anika😆...jokes apart...again the question...why did she turn back? No, not cuz of her "badaa dil"...she again came back for that emotion that only he draws out of her.
And then for a few brief moments we see an Anika giving in to all the emotions he draws out of her...utter exasperation at how he doesn't listen to anyone, including her, anger at why he didn't just leave when she asked him to, heartbreak over his condition as she hugs him to her, fussing over his wounds, panicking over his state...again, such a strong undercurrent of haq running through this scene...as if it's her right alone to tell him off, to fight with him, to soothe his wounds...not anyone else's. For a moment there, we were blessed with the soul of real Anika...and that made this scene worthwhile...some lovely acting from NM-SC in the way Shivaay and Anika were watching each other in this scene...deffo the highlight of the epi
She was both shaking him in anger and tending to his wounds also all worried...lol
This emotion in itself is multi-faceted...ismein guilt bhi hai aur phir bhi haq hai...ismein gussa bhi hai aur woh bhi haq wala...ismein remorse bhi hai, but woh bhi haq wala...har cheez mein there is a sense of right over each other, an instinctual right of belonging...the ugly turn of events also can't erase that...yes, Shivaay has to face the consequences of what he did...but it's not going to change the truth of what he will always feel for Anika...or what she feels for him.
Shivaay's second attempt at getting forgiveness the next morning was different...day one was him trying straightforward earnest apology...day two seems to be about him trying to prove his resolve in earning her forgiveness...all he can do is keep asking...so he stands there, immovable, waiting to earn her forgiveness...from the heart...this Shivaay now seems to be veering in more Majnu territory...all unkempt, wounds on his face, taking off his shoes so that he can feel his Laila Anika's pain...lol...jokes apart, the thought was nice in terms of atonement...that seeing her feel the pain of stones hurting her bare feet, he couldn't bear the luxury of shoes on his own feet and took those off.
But this Anika, who magically gets job IVs and a new house lined up the moment she leaves OM even though she is otherwise supposedly broke😆😆, was in no mood to entertain his "tamasha" as she called it again...so off she went yet again. Gotta laugh over how she's still sporting sindoor while otherwise claiming she's done with him😆
Shivaay's puppy dog eyes today notwithstanding, I feel this scene kinda overdid Shivaay ka statue mode and overfocused on his gore gore pair a little too much😆...also I might be the only one not too impressed by the extended lyrics of the new male O Jaana today...the first paragraph sounded better...maybe it would work better if the scene had been allowed to be a Shivika scene without extraneous stuff
But otherwise a better epi than the last two pathetic ones.
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Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
