Ishita looked at Raman and start narrating-when maa throw me out, I have no place to go, moreover I don't want to go anywhere. I sat there out of ur house ,whole day and night. Sab aate jaate mujhe dekh rahe the, shayad maa se sawaal bhi puch rahe honge. I don't wanna go from there but was just too broken to do anything or think anything rationally. Ashok came to me and told me to come home with him. I remember I look at him trying to understand what he was saying but jaise kuch samajh hi nahi aa raha tha, jaise meri saari samajh sab kuch aapke saath chali gayi thi. I was so lost that I don't know when I went his home with him. I remember he gave me food to eat but I didn't had it. Bas baithi hui thi, ek pathar ki tarah remembering all the little moments I had with u. Aap bahut achche pati the raman, aur main bahut buri biwi. Every moment was making me realise how much u loved me and how much I hurt u. I don't want ur forgiveness. Maafi nahi chahiye thi ,I want u back, toh hurt me, to slap me for all my mistakes. To hug me tight and sooth all my pain. I just wanted u but u were nowhere. Maine khud aapko khud se dur kar diya tha. That day I realised what u meant to me. She said with tears filled eyes while he was just looking at her with moist eyes.
He hugged her tight and said -i am sorry jaan, because of me, he was saying when she said -no Raman, not because of u. But because of my foolishness, I lost u. Mujhe lagaa tha agar main ashok ke saath time spend karungi toh aap jealoys honge aur khud ko mere laayak banane ki koshish karenge. Nahi pata tha ki mature log jealous nahi hote, hurt hote hai. Unhe bahut gehri chot lag jaati hai, nahi pata tha that by doing this, I was really pushing u away from me. Nahi jaanti thi ki aapko mere laayak nahi balki mujhe aapke laayak banna tha and I failed drastically. Ashok toh so gaya but main raat bhar jagti rahi, baarish ho rahi thi.i went out of his home, walking lifelessly without any aim on the secluded road. Bahut tez baarish ho rahi thi, andhera badhta jaa raha tha, aur iss andhere mein I got banged with a truck. She said making him shocked.
Raman -accident??
Ishita -haan, bahut bada accident tha par main mari nahi. Itni asaan maut kaise mil sakti thi, I was destined for more pain. Mujhe hospital le jaaya gaya,bahut saari chot lagi thi. Govt hospital mein pata nahi kitne din padi rahi. Naa din ka thikana naa mahine ka, I was just laying lifelessly on the bed. Naa khane ka thikana naa pyaas ki chinta ,was just a dead body. Bas don bhar bistar par padi rehti thi aur sochti thi, Aap kaise mujhe thoda saa bukhaar bhi ho jaata tha toh meri itni care karte the, aur ab kaise main laawaris ki tarah padi thi and no-one cared for me. But kisi ki bhi galti nahi thi usme, that was what I deserved. She said looking at him.
Raman looked at her and slowly pecked her temple, she closed her eyes feeling his touch when he said -tu hamesha se meri jaan thi, I don't know kaise jee tu mere bina. I never wanted this to happen with u.
Ishita -i know, she said and snuggled into him kissing his chest.
Raman -phir??
Ishita -phir Ek din main thik ho gayi. Mujhe hospital se nikaal diya gaya. I was walking thinking where to u as I had nothing, no house to stay and no money to live. I was just sitting near a tree when I meet a lady, she was leader of maids of that area. She felt bad for me and took me to a house, wahan usne mujhe kaam par lagwa diya.
Raman got shocked hearing this and asked -kaisa kaam??
Ishita -maid ke kaam par, I use to work there and got food in return
Kuch paise mil jaate the, I was good. Zindagi se koi umeed nahi thi naa saansein chal rahi thi. Yaa shayad kahin naa kahin ek halki si umeed thi, ki shayad aap wapas aa jao. U know I see one thing there, ki kaise pati hote hai, woh apni biwi ke paise bhi le lete the aur unhe maarte bhi the.still they love and care about their husband so much.that made me more guilty ki Maine apne itne achche pati ko apni bewakoofi mein kho diya. Wahan sab mujhse puchte the mere pati ke baare mein and I never wanted to believe ki aap mar gaye hai, wapas nahi aayenge, so I started applying sindoor. Mangalsutra toh main pehenti hi thi. Pata nahi kaise but dheere dheere mera vishwas aur mazbut ho gaya that u will come to me some day. U know I even did puja for ur safety. Mujhe yaad hai Maine vatt savitri ki puja ki thi aur pandit ji ne mujhe ashirwaad diya tha, akhand saubhagya ka. Main bahut khush thi, kyunki uss din mera vishwas aur pakka ho gaya tha that u will come back to me.
Raman -agar sab kuch thik tha toh phir yeh sharab aur ciggarate ki aadat kaise pad gayi.
Ishita looked at him and said -akelapan, akelapan bahut badi bimaari hoti hai aur main toh aapki tarah strong bhi nahi thi, ki har kuch jhel loon. Ander -ander ghut rahi thi, tut rahi thi. That day was my birthday, akelapan nahi bardasht hua, that day I saw some ladies in that locality having drinks, main bhi baith gayi. Pehle sirf baatein hui, phir sab peene lagi apna dukh baantte baantte. Maine bhi piya, it was yuck. Bahut bura tha, I even throw up but still I had it. Dheere dheere achcha lagne lagaa. Phir uske baad se, khana nahi chahiye hota tha. Sirf sharab, dheere dheere cigarette. U know Maine paose bhi churaye the, apni maalkin ke purse se. I was a bad thief, pakdi gayi, bahut maara tha usne mujhe .police bulayi gayi, I was in jail. Wahan bahut saare sharabi mil gaye. Bahut log the, woh log din mein shaher mein ghoomte the aur raat ko sharab-cigarrate ki party hoti thi. Khanabadosh. Main unke saath ho li.zindagi ka koi maksad nahi bacha. Din bhar ghoomna aur raat ko hosh khone tak peena. Dheere Dheere main marne lagi, u know I could feel that I am dying and wasn't sad but happy ki kahin toh khatam hogi yeh tadap, yeh takleef. I was almost dead, hafton ho gaye the,khana khaye hue, shayad paani piye hue bhi kai din ho gaye the. All I want was alcohol. Ek din kuch ngo wale aaye, doctors bhi the unke saath. They checked up and took me along with many with them. Ek bade hospital mein le jaa kar kachre ki tarah hume phenk diya gaya. Phir naa sharab thi, naa cigarette aur naa jeene ki chahat. All I want to do was to close my eyes and never to wake up. She said closing her eyes and tears fell off her eyes feeling the pain.
Raman too was just looking at her crying not knowing how to console her.
Ishita looked at him and said wiping his tears -dont cry, main mari nahi. Tab bhi zinda rahi, shayad aapka pyaar tha jisne meri saansein rukne nahi di. Wahin mujhe ashok mila, he took me his home and then to the rehab. Phir maa aayi mujhse milne, mujhse lipat kar khoob royi but main nahi royi. Rona hi nahi aata tha, aansu sookh gaye the. Phir amma appa, bhi aaye. All cried but I don't. Phir maa mujhe ghar le gayi, bahu nahi mujhe apni beti bana liya. She gave me a reason to live. Unka pyaar, it was soothing like ur love. Meri tadap thodi kam ho gayi. Phir unke aur ashok ke insistence par Maine aapka business sambhala. Dheere dheere sab thik hone lagaa bas mera intezaar khatam nahi hua and see today I have u back in my life. I am safe in ur arms. She said wounding his arms around herself while he just hugged her tight pecking her temple.
Ishita kissed his arm and said -u know Raman, maa ne mujhe bahut pyaar diya, meri zindagi ke adurepan ko bahut hadh tak kar kar diya tha apne pyaar se, I love her so much. More then my own amma appa. She said smiling making him smile too.
She then look at him and said -mujhe maa ke paas jaana hai.
Raman -huh??
Ishita -haan raman, I want to go back to her. Please mujhe unke paas le chahiye. Mujhe unki yaad aa rahi hai. She said getting restless.
Raman -yes, we will go to her, after two days.
Ishita -nahi do din baad nahi. Aaj hi, abhi. I want to hug her tight. Mujhe unke paas jaana hai.
Raman hugged ishita tight and said -but u were so happy u wanted to stay here maa, then why suddenly u want to go back.
Ishita -pata nahi kyun raman, mujhe maa ki bahut yaad aa rahi hai. Please take me back. Ab aur mujhe yahan nahi rehna. I want to go to our home, hamare ghar mein hamare kamre mein, I want to be with u and maa. Mujhe please ghar le chaliye raman.she said getting restless.
Raman -ok, why u r being restless, Main le chalta hoon tumhe ghar, soon we will be back to our house and to maa. Tu please tension naa le. He said caressing her hair while she said -main kitni buri ho, maa ne mujhe kabhi akela nahi choda while i am living happily leaving her alone. mujhe maa ke paas jaana hai. She said being adamant like a kid.
Raman -aisa kuch nahi hai, maa is not alone and I am arranging ticket, bahut jald hum maa ke saath honge. tu ekdum pareshan mat ho. He said caressing her hair while she snuggle into him feeling restless. He was understanding that she is being cranky because she wants alcohol and after talking about the painful phase of her life, she want something or someone to relax. And for her only him and his mother is only solace.
He patted her forehead slowly while ishita soon slept hugging him tight. He made her sleep peacefully and called his travel agent to book their ticket to Delhi as soon as possible.
That's all for now, enjoy and do comment and hit like. Will wait for it.
Ps-200+ likes with long comments for next updt.
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