Sameer- Naina OS: Kyun Ki..
"Naina! ''Sameer's eyes had already started pooling the unshed tears that had stopped to flow when she had turned her footsteps away from her and he had left...
He still regrets his actions even after two decades have turned him more mature,more responsible and more understanding.
"Tum aaogi mujhe yakin nahin tha.'' He chose his words for he feared speaking anything which would not only hurt her ..but both.
"Sameer!Mujhe tumse baat karni thi.'' Naina spoke forwarded the very steps towards him ;those very steps she had taken away from him on that hill top.
"Baat karni thi? Haan mujhe bhi kehni thi kuch. ''Sameer voiced shakily as he felt a storm of emotions doing twirls near his windpipe.He never had better experiences in confrontations..the confrontations have gone from bad to worse..and he didn't want to experience the worst.
"Pehle tum ''Naina uttered as she held on to the dowel of the hospital bed.She needed to be strong.She needed to be Naina Agarwal and not Sameer's once upon a time special friend'.
"Wo..Naina..I am Sorry.Main jaanta hoon ki maine gunah kiya hai tumhari bharosa todkar,dil dukha kar..Par Naina mujhe apne gunah par sharm aa rahi hai.Tum mujhe please maaf kar do''. Sameer pleaded to the victim of his stupidity,his ego...his sin..his Naina.
"Maaf to anjaane mein huyi galti ke liye kiya jaata hai.Tum to shart apne pure hosh aur awaaz ke saath lagaya tha na? ''Naina asked without turning her head and trying to keep a straight face.
Because tears will make her feel weak.Today there was no place for tears.Only explanations.
"Naina..Wo..Main...''Sameer' s words trailed as her words kicked in..
"Haan Ya Na..Sirf Haan Ya Naa.''
"Haan.Aur iske liye I am Sorry.Tum jo kahogi main who karne ke liye taiyar hoon.Please Naina mujhe maaf kar do.Tum maaf kardo to main chala jaunga yahan se..phir kabhi..''
SLAP...
"Naina! ''Sameer looked shocked as he still was trying to recover from her sudden reflex.
"Kya kaha..maaf kardoon..jo kahungi wo karoge..phir dur chale jaoge...phir... ''Naina's eyes reddened with fury rising inside her..
How can he just talk nonsense and escape?
"Sameer! Pyar karti thi main tumse.Pyar.Sacha pyar.Khud ko bhul ke maine tumse pyar kiya tha Sameer. ''The dowel could no longer support the heaviness of her emotions that was quaking her body.
She slumped on the floor.
"Tumhe meri badnaami hi karni thi na..meri papa ko nicha dikhana chahate the na tum...
Meri yeh frock ki zip khol dete..Meri shirt ki button phad dete..Mujhe..
Mujhe..sabke saamne...gaal pe..kiss kar dete ...
Lekin mere dil ke saath,mere saath aisa natak kyun kiya tumne Sameer?
Meri dil toh pyar ke halki hawa jaise ehsason ko mehsoos karna shuru hi kiya tha ki tumne isme mohabbat ki andhi laa di..Kabhi jo ankhein kitabon se nahin hat tit hi..tumne unme shaadi ki sapne bhar diye...Jo jawan sirf sach bolti thi tumne use jhooth ke degree dilwa di...Kyun kiya aisa ?kyun? Kaise maaf kardoon tumhe.. ''She couldn't stop her flowing tears as they rolled nonchalantly.
"Naina..I .. am..sorry.. ''He could only voice this much..only that much.
"Sorry! Tum maafi maang rahe ho na..Kahan se maafi doon tumhe? Yeh dil to toot gaya hai Sameer..Maine kahin pe use kho diya hai..Maine kho diya hai..Tumne dekha hai? Naina Agarwal ke toota hua dil ke tukde? Dekha hai Sameer Maheshwari? ''She asked as he tried reaching out to her in vain attempt of comforting her..the broken her..
"Naina..aisa mat kaho..Tum maaf nahin karoge to shayad zindagi bhar main khud ko kabhi maaf nahin kar paunga..'' He voiced as he started hating himself more..a bit more than earlier times.
"Mujhe tumse koi umeed nahin thi..
Tum mujhe maaf kardo Sameer.. maine tumko bahut takleef diyen hain..Meri jaise Mani ben ko kitna sambhala tumne,kitna jhela tumne..Tum mujhe maaf kardo..Tumhari koi galti nahin thi..
Saari galti meri thi..Sirf meri...'' Naina spoke in hiccups as the sweet memories flashed by her eyelids in jiffy.
"Nahin Naina..maafi to mujhe chahiye..mein tumhara gunegaar hoon..Tum apne aap ko dosh mat do..Please. ''He let his tears flows seeing the extent he has broken her..
He has created another Sameer Maheshwari..
"Tum isliye maafi chahate ho na taki apni galti ki ghutan se bahar nikal sako? Par main maafi de kar kya paungi ? Bolo Sameer.. ''She asked wiping the fresh tears that had rolled down her cheeks.
"Tum mujhe kabhi dubara apni zindagi main nahin dekhogi..Pakka Promise..'' Sameer said as he swore.
"Chaku hai tumhare paas? ''Naina asked with a sly smile that bloomed between her tear stricken cheek bones.
"Matlab..haan hai..'' Sameer didn't know why she needed a knife at such a point of time.
"Uthao use aur maar daalo mujhe...Sameer Maheshwari...Maar daalo mujhe...Mujh yeh sab kuch sunanae se pehle maar daalo.. meri dil to mar hi chukka hai..ab baki zindagi aur yeh chal rahi saans bhi lelo..Itna to tum apni bet wali Naina' ke liye kar hi sakte ho na...Itna to tum apni Naina ko tohfa de sakte ho... ''She spitted the words holding his collar.
"Naina..hosh mein aao..Tum pagal ho gaye ho.''. He tried to bring her back to her sense,her usual quiet,chirpy self..which seemed a distant dream now.
"Tumhein hosh tha..jab meri dil todkar muh pher ke bhaag gaye the?..Gunah kiya tha tumhari parwah karke..Gunah kiya tha tumhe pyar ke...Mujhe meri gunah ka sazaa do Sameer..Sazaa de do.. ''She collapsed as he tried holding her steady.
"Nahin Naina..Aisa mat kaho..Main tumhe dukhi nahin dekh sakta..Main tumhe pasand karne laga tha Naina ..tumhari acchai se main haarne laga tha..Main tumhari aankhon mein aansho kabhi nahin dekhna chahta tha..Lekin kismet ne meri kabhi saath nahin diya hai..ek awara,mawali se sacha pyar karogi to tumhe toote huye sapne hi milenge Naina..Isiliye main nahin chahata ki tumhare paas rehkar tumhe aur dukh doon... ''Sameer voiced as she held on to the bed post shedding the tears that were slowly turning dry.
"Sameer! Bas! Kuch aur mat bolo ..Tum nahin samjh rahe ho..'' She tried making him see sense..His Sorry' can never heal her broken heart..can never patch the bruises of her broken dreams..
" Samjha do mujhe ki kyun meri maafi se tum dur bhag rahe ho...Kyun tumse dur jaana chahate hi baar baar tumhare paas khinche chala aata hoon..Kyun tumhari anshun yun raat bhar mujhein satati rehte hein,kyun tumhari chupi mujhe bardasht nahin hoti..Bolo Naina kyun main tumse door nahin jaa paa raha hoon..? ''He asked as he tried wiping the batch of tears which had trickled long back..
"Nahin Sameer..Tum mujhse pyar nahin karte..Yeh sab ..main aur samajhna nahin chahti...Tum mujhse pyar kar hi nahin sakte.. ''She steadied herself to answer his confusions as she hiccupped in between.
"Naina! Kya ab bhi tum mujhse pyar nahin karte? Kya mera koi bazood nahin hai tumhare samne? Tum itni asani se sab kuch kaise bhul gayi?'' He asked trying to reassure that atleast the one person he was madly loved by would still be loving him after the devastating heart-ache..
"Bhul jaun? Kise bhul jaun? Humara ek saath mandir jaana, surya uday dekhna..Tum bhul sakte ho? Itni khushi kyun di ki ab main inn yadon ko mita bhi nahin sakti...Kyun Sameer...Itni khushi dene se behtar tha ki tum mere katl kar dete..''. She slumped to floor and he knew she can never forgive or forget him.
"Mujhe patan nahi Naina ki kab tumhe khushi dete dete main khud khush hone laga..tumhe khush dekhkar khud ki dukh ko bhulne laga...Sab kuch jhooth nahin tha Naina..Mujhe maaf kardo Naina'' He voiced as he knew everything felt a pretence for her..planned pretences.
"Main ek baar apne aap ko kho chuki hoon...Ab aur nahin..Iss zindagi mein tumhe ek masoom ladki ki dil todne ka maafi kabhi nahin milegi Sameer..kabhi nahin. ''She voiced determinedly as she wiped the tears and got up to leave.
"Nahin..Naina mujhe aise chod ke mat jao.Mummy to kab ki chod chuki hai...Tum aise..Takleef tumhe ho rahi hai aur aanshoon mere aa rahe hein.Kyunki hum do insaan nahin kabka ek ho chuke hein.I LOVE YOU Naina.I LOVE YOU. ''He confessed as he knew he had again lost her..perhaps this is forever.
She halted as his words fell in her ears.She turned back and met his eyes..The eyes full of tears and helplessness.
She looked at those very eyes which once swept her off.Those eyes which held unfathomable emotions.Those eyes which brought tides and ebbs in her river like life.
Each step she took away from him was heavy.Their souls tried to hold them back,screamed and turned around trying to get torn away from their bodies and reach out each other's hand,to hug each other and never let go but they couldn't.
"Tum bahut bure ho.. ''She stamped her feet in agony and broken ness and ran never to look back.
She should hate him but some parts of her shattered heart still throbbed for him..She still loved him.
The distance between them was infinite now.
But he was determined to win back her trust,win back her love
Kyunki
He was more herself than she was and she was more himself than she was.Whatever their souls were made of,his and her were the same.
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P.S.:Thank you for reading.😃 Would love to read all your feedbacks.😳
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