Simply On-Screen? - Page 4

Originally posted by: ARCHRE

Hi...Alishah ...

I loved the post ...you are a wonderful writer ... after I read it ... I super loved the title too..😊

" You are the books you read ,

the movies you watch ,

the music you listen to ,

the people you spend time with ,

the conversation you engage in

Choose wisely what you feed your mind "

It cannot be ruled out that you are the person that you are because of the events that you have been thru , apart from the fact that you have been born a certain way with a certain set of parameters at birth and these continue to influence. How much you move away from these or stay within these purely depends on how your life has been and where your lifes experiences have taken you ... or more so how your personality has evolved over the years .

In more ways than one we do feel that we are growing everyday or changing everyday( unless one tries to stay stagnant intentionally - I have seen this too ) ... A very example being that as years pass by we keep feeling we could do a few things differently or we do do some things differently from the way we would have done it in the past ...

EVOLVING EVERYDAY AS I WOULD CALL IT ... because of factors that influence.

Today TV , social media and our interactions with people on a day to day basis do influence our lives ... It may not be a conscious effort but subconsciously things do take shape ... and evolve to make you what you are today ... Somethings work on you on a slow pace and slowly shape you up ...but sometimes something touches you instantly and you take a u turn . It has to hit you hard .

JNDSD is a show a lot of people probably started watching for the promises of women empowerment it offered ... finally it is a show and the base factor is entertainment ... But does it really only entertain ...

It is going thru a painful phase which make a lot of people think whether symbols of marriage are really as important or being with the person one wants to spend their life has been more important... The moment these questions come up ... it means that the show has affected people at a different level other than just entertainment ...

See the kind of beautiful writings that the forum sees on a day to day basis ... that surely cannot be just entertainment , can it ? It is questions being asked and answers been sought ... and i am sure its not forgotten after one leaves the forum at the end of the day .Now this is a regular day to day show ... so maybe it has an influence like this ...

A movie may not have the same impact ... because it gets done in like 2.5 hours ...But then it again depends on how much effort is made to send out a message ... i personally liked a movie

' Life in a Metro' It just left me asking so many questions to myself ...But again a movie is a one time moment ... which you go to watch and maybe later forget about ... but dont you sometimes find traces of what you strictly liked or disliked in memory ?

Anything that repeats and repeats again and again definitely has a much larger impact that a one time influence ...

How one reacts to the influence also depends on how open the attitude is , how bold the spirit is or how risk worthy the opportunity is in this world of today ... It depends a lot on how you have evolved as a person over the years ...Simply goes to say that every single thing you see , hear or do goes to slowly make the person that you are ...

i am not sure i made sense ... but I did try 😊

So it surely cannot be ' Simply On -Screen '...Can it ?

Originally posted by: Missesha

Heya... I loved your post. This is probably the best read on this forum, and I couldn't stop myself from sharing my thoughts.

Screen life impacts us a lot on our day to day basis. And many times it's impact becomes the reason for the decisions we take, or the expectations we build from our lives.

And sometimes such impacts are necessary. Consider movies like Dangal or three idiots or tare zameen par or Dear Zindagi, and many more. All of these have lasting impressions and have given good messages for society's well-being.

But I don't think I could say the same for JNDSD. I only see this show as an entertainment, and nothing that really has a take home message. My reasons:

- Vitharv makes a great pair, and I respect their love story. But their current situation doesn't allow me to sympathise with them, because the story is blown out-of-proportion. It is less realistic and more dramatic to me as a viewer.

- Vitharv uniting is like any ordinary person trying to achieve or fulfill their dreams. Just as many of us dream to become successful actors, have high flying corporate careers, have big houses, get visa to settle abroad, marry a beautiful girl, etc etc etc. And for all these dreams we struggle very hard and make great efforts.

I see the same with Vividha and Atharva. It was their dream to be together, and they are working towards it. "I don't see this to be as one of the most unique love stories. It is ordinary"

- On Vividha choosing to stick with Atharva over Ravish, is also not a big deal either, in my opinion. She loves Atharva and doesn't love Ravish, so it is very simple. Whether Atharva is alive or dead, Vividha has no reason to keep sticking to Ravish. So I don't see much message here.

Vividha, on the other hand is one of the least impressive of all the three leads. Her character sketch is quite poor. Or let's say, makers want to give her wings, but are clipping it instead, maybe in the fear of trp loss. Don't know, but Vividha certainly doesn't impress.

So while screens leave a great impacts on our minds many times, I wouldn't say the same for this show. It's pure entertainment. The actors are really good, and it is a good time pass.

Otherwise, it is non-realistic and full of co-incidence: i.e a father like KK, a woman marrying the step-brother of her lover without knowing about him, the step-brother trying too hard to normalise the wrongs done by his father, a man who has been beaten to death goes to baby mode and back to normal mode, a family full of weirdos like Kalindi, Vipul, Suman, Sujata...

The day all of the above makes sense, I may give thoughts on Vividha's actions, otherwise this show is nothing more than entertainment. It's quite regressive show too. And of course, can't see any take home message.

Originally posted by: -Alishah-

How gracious you are. Thank you so much!

That quote sums up rather perfectly the school of thought that I am from. If I am giving anything my time, moments of my existence, then I want to take something from it too. That is why books and music and films and paintings that I appreciate become a part of me.

You have touched the main subject right there about everything that you experience making you who you are. You know, I used to wish there was a button that I could press and all the times that I have screwed up, I wouldn't have and all the people that have hurt me wouldn't have nor would I have hurt anyone. But then, I realised that it is all those mistakes and hurt feelings that make me who I am. If none of my screw ups or mistakes or heartbreaks had not happened, I wouldn't be me. None of us would. It is all our little experiences that do. EVOLUTION, as you so aptly called it.

You are saying that you are not sure if you made sense but you are saying everything that I said but better!

Surely, if people are coming here to share thoughts and discuss ideas, this show is not just something you are leaving at 6pm. No matter what ideas are forming, it is altering something inside of you. To me, that is a beautiful thing. If JNDSD changes or progresses your opinion about your own life, then it has gone above and beyond its primary purpose!

Your thoughts are so full of delight.

Originally posted by: -Alishah-

Thank you- very sweet comment!

Although I belong to an alternative opinion than you regarding the show, I fully understand your point of view too. You are quite right that things like Dangal and Taare Zameen Par can have a huge impact on us but it is so interesting that you find the show regressive in many ways.

In terms of ViTharv uniting being an ordinary dream, I always saw it as something extraordinary because it goes against what the norms of society, especially Indian society, say. Indeed, the 'right' thing to do is stay in that marriage for the in laws or the parents or the kids etc. The fact that they are not even trying to make the marriage work was for me a revolutionary stance to take.

Similarly, I always saw your point about it being obvious that they would stay together more complicated than that. It is the easy option to accept the hand that society has dealt you- more difficult to fight!

I accept your final points of unrealistic aspects- they have to put some masala to keep TRP Auntys happy na😆

Thanks for sharing your thoughts, nice to hear another side.

Originally posted by: Missesha

Firstly Alishah, I want to let you know that you are such a charismatic writer that you pull people towards a discussion.

Your writing is so genuine, that it creates room for discussion rather than confining it to justifying "said opinions".

And this is why I felt like sharing my views on bold. Intention is not to counter argue your opinion, but just sharing mine: You are right, Indian television especially, makes it too obvious that for a woman, a marriage is a sacrifice that she should make either for her parents, in-laws or kids, and live with it for the rest of her life. Marriage is her ultimate goal regardless of that is what she wanted or not.

And from that POV, if Vividha is choosing to go against it for her love, then yes for TV industry this may be revolutionary.

But as a woman of today's society, I feel that women have already attained enough freedom to exercise choices in their lives. They choose on whom and when to marry, whether to have kids or career (or both), whether to live with in-laws or as a couple etc etc.

Over a decade, I have seen, the Mothers-in-law (MILs) being softer and kinder towards their DIL, have seen families living more relaxed lifestyles and allowing their DILs to live with liberty, such as; wear clothes of her choice, eating outside, pursuing her career, not pressurising heavily on cooking, or raising kids etc. This is a great change that is happening at least since a decade, and it is also becoming prominent with time.

However, such changes are not yet reflected on TV industry. TV shows still focus on sarees, sindoor, mangalsutra, ghar ka kaam, shagun, apshagun, sanskaar and marriage as the ultimate truth of one's life... And JNDSD also focuses heavily on such stuff, due to which it doesn't come across as a show of nayi soch for me.

I would have loved if Vividha was shown to be more action oriented and solving her problems in a practical way rather then the symbolic way of dressing up as widow, ulte phere, the meaningless mangalsutra etc to show her love for Atharv.

I want TV industry to be at par with the real life modern bahu (aged 25) in today's world (2016-17) and their ideologies. Until then what may seem revolutionary from a TV industry perspective, seems ordinary to me from a real-life perspective.

Having said that, I still watch the show on & off. In my mind, I would love to see Vitharv uniting and moving on. I equally love Ravish and want him to lead a great life. But if things don't go that way, it won't bother me either. I feel it's just a show after all 😊