Rishbala ff Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam

Chapter 3 - meeting after ages

she wanted to run to him, hug him tight,to be in his arms again, to feel his love again, to make him feel loved again, to take away all his pain and love him forever. But she knew, this was not the right time. She had to wait.

He started hearing footsteps. It was getting closer and louder and then it stopped. She stood a few steps away from his table. He heard her say

" good evening sir, " she had a tough time forming the words but she managed to say this much without stammering. He was shocked, would be an understatement. The same voice, which he longed to hear all these days , he heard it. His body unknowingly turned back . he saw her. He couldn't believe it. His body went numb. His madhu, his biwi, whom he was searching for all these months was now standing infront of him , with the same bright smile. He couldn't see any thing else , it was only her, his eyes were rooted on her. Him and her .

Bg- jeena jeena

Hmm.. hmm...

Dehleez pe mere dil ki
Jo rakhe hain tune kadam
Tere naam pe meri zindagi
Likh di mere humdum

Haan seekha maine jeena jeena kaise jeena
Haan seekha maine jeena mere humdum
Na seekha kabhi jeena jeena kaise jeena
Na seekha jeena tere bina humdum

Dehleez pe merey dil ki
Jo rakhe hain tune kadam
Tere naam pe meri zindagi
Likh di mere humdum

Haan sikha maine jeena jeena kaise jeena
Haan sikha maine jeena, mere humdum
Na sikha kabhi jeena jeena kaise jeena
Na sikha jeena tere bina humdum

Hmmm.. hmmm..

Sacchi si hain yeh taareefein
Dil se jo maine kari hain...

Sacchi si hain yeh taareefein
Dil se jo maine kari hain...

Jo tu mila to saji hain
Duniya meri humdum
O aasma mila zameen ko meri
Aadhe aadhe poore hain hum
Tere naam pe meri zindagi
Likh di mere humdum

Haan seekha maine jeena jeena, kaise jeena
Haan seekha maine jeena, mere humdum
Na seekha kabhi jeena jeena kaise jeena
Na seekha jeena tere bina humdum

Hmmm... hmmm.

the surrounding just became blur for him. " madhu" he said. That was the only thing that came out of his mouth. He started walking towards her in a daze. After hearing her name from his mouth after a long time, madhu was feeling it hard to control herself from running to him and breaking down in his arms. His voice was still held that power on her, it still felt the same as she could remember, except that it held even more love than before.

After a few steps, he was standing infront of her, so close. She couldn,t lift her head fully to look at him as she felt weak at that moment. His hands slowly moved up to caress her face, he wanted to know if it was just a fascination or for real. He didn't want it to be a dream. He wanted her back.

Madhu suddenly became aware of the happenings. Just when rk's hand was about to touch her face , she took a step back. She said " excuse me sir, I'm jeeva, jeeva malhotra, your new personal councellor". Rk couldn't believe it. It couldn't be. It was impossible. He knew it was her. He could feel her. " madhu , what are you saying. Your lying right? It's you right, tell me madhu . please. I know it's you " he was now gripping her shoulders. " sir, what happened? I don't get you" she said now looking into his eyes. That's when he noticed her eyes. It was not like madhu's . it was greenish blue in colour and she was also wearing specs which madhu did not, but still he felt attracted to those eyes. He felt as if it was hiding something from him. Madu now knew that her contact lens wasn'nt helping much. " sir" she called out again. Rk took in her appearance. It was truly different from madhu's. she was wearing a full length top and skirt,it did cover her fully and was not at all revealing. But it was not like madhu's. he suddenly turned , showing his back towards her. He couldn't take it. It was hard for him to believe that she is not madhu.

How can this be, how can someone be just like my madhu. She's exactly like her, except for her eyes. Even her voice is of madhu. This can't be. If she's not madhu, then how come I felt madhu's presence when she came in. was it because they are look alikes. No . I know my madhu. And I know it whenever she is around. I need to find it out. I'll find it out' he thought to himself. what if she what she said is true?, what if she is someone else and not madhu? Madhu won,t lie to me about herself. She would never stop herself from coming back to me if she sees me. Whatever it is, I need control myself and hold on. I should not be rude to her.

Madhu knew this was coming. But she had to handle it. She knew it. Even though she was scared, she still felt that happiness in her heart when he recognized her. He still felt her presence. He still loved her more than anything. That gave her enough courage to move on with this act. She was about to ask him what was wrong when her eyes caught the paper kept on rk's table. She took it and it turned out to be her sketch rk had drawn. A smile crept onto her face as she caressed the picture, she could feel herself touching his soul, his love. Coming out of it she said acting as if surprised " sir, you've drawn my picture. I didn't know you were such a brilliant artist. But as far as I remember, we haven't met before", "it's not yours, its my wife madhu, madhubala rishab kundra" rk was now standing near the window. "huh?"

wallet too fell down. When madhu bent down to take it she saw their marriage pic inside it.now she was really happy. Rk had replaced his dad's pic with their photo after the sultan fiasco. She heard him say " thank you" when she returned him the wallet , to which she just smiled. Now rk was stuck. Her smile was just like madhu's. he could stare at it, throughout his life. He showed her his and madhu's photo. Now madhu was really surprised she didn't need to act infront of him for that. His phone was full of only their photos and some , madhu's alone, which was taken without her notice. Even her sleeping.

" it'll be hard for you to believe, even it was for me when I saw you here. I never knew there would be a look alike for madhu, but its true. You look exactly like her except for your eyes. She had caramel brown eyes", " oh! I didn't know. Actually I was living in Kashmir till now. I came to know you were married just a few days ago. Maybe this was the reason why dr. mehra asked me to take care of you , I guess", she lied. " maybe". He came and sat opposite to her. He kept staring at her as she sat sipping her coffee, making her conscious. " sir' could you please stop staring at me? Its making me feel uncomfortable," " im sorry, but still im not out of my shock". Every expression, even its tiniest details , her cute dimples and her beautiful smile , everything was a zerox of madhu's. he was having a hard time with himself. With a heavy heart she decided to begin the conversation " sir your wife? Doctor mehra said she's missing. Is she...",

" she's alive" he said in an outburst. He was really angry with everyone doubting on madhu's missing and claiming that she's no more, and now she also started. But looking at her, he couldn't shout at her, she had his madhu's face, she made him fell more close to her, like he is with madhu. His was gripping his fist, controlling his anger. She was happy with his sudden outburst. She could still feel his love and possessiveness in is voice.

" sorry sir , I didn't mean to hurt you. But...", she stared at him giving a questioning look, so he said, " my security agencies had spotted her recently near motihari. We'll find her soon", " sir , if she is alive, then why is she not coming back. Why is she staying away", this question made him speak out . " she might want to relieve her pain before coming back or maybe afraid of hurting herself again. But she'll come back when everything settles down. I know she will. She can't stay away from me for long and she wont" . he said the last line directly looking at her and the had a brief eyelock. Madhu could feel the depth of his words.

" sir actually, what had happened between you ?. Would you mind sharing it with me? It would reduce your pressure."

(bg- saiyaara from EKT)

Aasmaan tera mera hua
Khwaab ki tarah dhuaan dhuaan
Aasmaan tera mera hua
Saans ki tarah ruaan ruaan

Ho jaaye jahaan tu jaaye
Paaye mujhe hi paaye
Saaye ye mere hain tujh mein samaaye

Saiyaara main saiyaara, Saiyaara tu saiyaara
Sitaaron ke jahaan mein milenge abb yaara [x2]

Tu jo mila toh yun hua
Ho gayi poori adhoori si duaa
Tu jo gaya, toh le gaya sang tere
Mere jeene ki har wajah

Ho jaaye jahaan tu jaaye
Paaye mujhe hi paaye
Saaye ye mere hain tujh mein samaaye

Saiyaara main saiyaara, Saiyaara tu saiyaara
Sitaaron ke jahaan mein milenge abb yaara [x2]

Tumpe miti tumse bani
Tumse hua hai haan khud pe yaqeen
Tu jo nahi to naa sahi
Main hoon yahaan toh tu hai yahin kahin

Ho jaaye jahaan tu jaaye
Paaye mujhe hi paaye
Saaye ye mere hain tujh mein samaaye

Saiyaara main saiyaara, Saiyaara tu saiyaara
Sitaaron ke jahaan mein milenge abb yaara

Chapter 4- back to back

He sat staring at her for a while, still not out of his shock and not knowing what to say. He managed to say " I lost her , for the second time, because of my foolishness. I think , you already know". " yes sir. Dr Mishra had told me, but I need to know from you . how much it affects you . then only I can help you", " you need more proof about its affects other than my present condition?" he asked desperately. " I didn't mean that sir. It's just that you need to bring out your feeling which you've buried up till now . you need to unburden yourself and I'm here to help you for that. For that you need to speak out, to forget the past and move on. You don't think your wife will like to see you in this condition, do you?".

to forget the past and move on' hearing these lines, rk remembered madhu

Flashback

" rk , you need to forget about your past . then only you can reduce the pain inside you. Your dad was weak rk , that's why he had to leave you. Not because he wanted to. Its not your fault rk. Your mom married another man for you, because she was a lonely mother and was scared to bring you up alone. And dipali, she's not even worth of you. You said that you're happy that she left you , then why are you thinking about it and wasting your time?. You don't think your dad will feel happy seeing you like this, now do you?"

Flashback ends.

Rk looked at her intently, trying to look through her eyes. Madhu knew what he was thinking, she had unknowingly taken him back to her memories.

Rk was really confused, could this be someone other than my madhu? She's just like her. Her voice , her words , its depth and everything , except her eyes. God please help me.he closed his eyes thinking

is she is my madhu? It might be just a feeling because I'm missing madhu a lot. But its hard, hard to believe that your not here madhu. where are you?'

he slowly opened his eyes and wiped off the little moisture ,which had appeared in his eyes by then.

Madhu looked at him and felt angry at herself for doing all these,but she had to. There was no other choice.

" sir, if your wife had asked you to go for councelling to ease your mind, you would surely do , right? , so take it for her", " I don't know you, but looking at you i could tell you. If my wife was here, I won't have the need of a doctor. How the pain in me reduce when my medicine is far away?". Now it was becoming hard for madhu to go on with her act.

He continued " first I betrayed her love and, now her trust", " sir , can you start from where the problems began? Like when differences started developing between you and your wife ?" she asked faking curiosity . unknown to her , she was behaving herself confusing rk more. He stood and walked towards the window, taking in the view of sunset. Madhu followed him and stood beside him feeling the warmth of the evening , a smile curved up her lips which took away rk's concentration.

Madhu looked back at him to find his eyes on her, she looked away as if not noticing it. He said " her smile was more beautiful that this sunset, it used to take away whatever worries I held. No one could or will love me like she did." Now madhu's eyes was back on him , " have you ever been in love ms jeeva?or are you?", " I do love someone" she replied in a daze. "Have you ever felt your heartbeats raising when that person is around you? Have you felt your heavy heart melting , having that person beside you? , scared of them drifting away have you felt the urge to hold that person on to you? Have you felt that person's presence , whenever near to you?" he asked with such an intensity, directly looking into her eyes, scaring madhu to non ends.

does he mean that he knows its me. is he trying to tell me that I can't act in front of him, he would surely know .'

rk continued " I used to have all these feelings. Even now, I do. You could say that it was a feeling in me of losing her that led till here" madhu relaxes a bit ashe believed her act. Come on who's she kidding, the superstar himself had taught her to act. And he never fails in what he taught.

" sir can you explain", he looked at her for a while and continued, sipping his coffee

" our life was getting settled after all the problems and sufferings. It was Just 5 months after our marriage ,me and producer amar behl was having a tiff . I couldn,t attend the shoot for somedays and he began threatening me even after I promised to finish the scenes on time. So I quit his movie and he bribed some other producers to ban me from the industry. But before he could do that decided to produce my own movie and with madhu's help found director mohul chopra . we began hunting for a new face for the heroine role, but didn't find anyone perfect. Then one day mohul sir unknown to us shot some of my and madhu's time spent together. He showed that to me saying that madhu was apt for the role and we would have the best chemistry ever. First, I was really angry at him for shooting out private moments and showing me. I couldn't think of presenting her as my heroine as I felt it to be, like selling her for money." He said as tears blurred his vision , but he wiped it off as madhu watched on.

" but after I thought over it , I wanted to make her my heroine as she was really talented but I knew that madhu hated all these. She hated being in the limelight . even when I asked her, she said that she wanted to be known only as my wife . her only dream was to take care of me and our family, but due to the cruel play of fate, she took up the role to save my reputation. But unknown to me, my pabho and bhabhi were plotting to create differences between me and madhu and remove her from my life",

Now madhu interferes as if she does not know all these " why did they do that? Didn't they like her?",

" my bhabhi or to be more specific, dipali, was my ex - girlfriend. She married my step brother for money but unfortunately for her, his debut movie flopped. That's when I entered the movie industry . from then on she was trying to somehow get back into my life , but failed miserably all the time. Even after I married madhu, she never stopped" He said feeling disguisted.

" then my pabho. She hadn't come for our wedding, so she didn't know madhu. she liked madhu a lot after meeting her but, on the day of my conference on my film, some pundit had come home for a pooja and predicted that madhu was danger for my existence. From then on they have been making her do some nonexistent nivarans, telling her its for my long life whereas their plan was to make her more weak".

Madhu " I know its not right to say but, if you think from your pabho's side , you know she's like your mother, so she might have got scared about your life and that's why she did all these."

" which world are you living in ? , when some pundit, a mere stranger come and predicts that my wife will be my end , how can they just believe it. Is he a god or something? God has never given the right to any human to predict others life. They even tried to kill her and our baby. She was pregnant back then. Even if my fate is such, they know how much I love her and that I can't live without her. Still how can they expect me to forget her within a day , forget our love , our child everything, leave her and move on? That too just believing on a stranger's words. I don't think god makes wrong decisions. He united us. It was his decision. They should have faith on him and not a pundit who's a mere human."

" sir, im sorry. I didn't mean it like that" still, the joy she felt at that moment had no bounds.

" its ok. they said that she was danger for my life , if you see, actually it was the contrary . it was after my entry in her life , that she began to suffer, in every possible way. She saved my life, loved me even after I destroyed her family's happiness. Then I betrayed her, acting as if I loved her. But the truth is that I was really in love with her then, it was me trying to convince myself that I was not", his words were intensified with emotions.

" and then?" " I failed to hold on to my ego. I was scared to lose her and through hook or crook at last I had her by my side, she gave me a second chance. We got married again and I had promised her I would never hurt her again and trust her more than anyone but when then this movie issue came up I broke that too. I was feeling insecured thinking that she was going away from me. when I got paralyzed , she was the only one who stood by me. i had asked her to abort our child for our movie even though I didn't want to and she had refused it and later I abided by her decision because of my fatherly instincts. But still even in middle of all these , pabho and dips were making her life hell. They made me think that soon she would be behind stardom. I was still scared of loosing her. After I got cured, I couldn't take the news of my baby's miscarriage and was hell furious on her, even though my heart always said that she was not at fault. I thought she was behind fame and distanced myself from her, when she was actually the only one who was with me. it was the stress she was put through, which led to her miscarriage. The wife in her had to go through a lot, seeing me drunk everyday and with another girl at the bar..., even on her birthday I ...", he couldn't finish it and sighs , disguisted at himself.

"Ria . it was her with whom I spent my nights at the bar. I brought her home believing her that madhu was making her miserable and to teach madhu a lesson. I didn't belive my wife then. I even believed that she trid to poison ria knowing full well that she could never hurt anyone, when in reality, ria had done that to fool me. I had turned a blind eye to all her pleas and pain but still she went to that place , far away in the woods, to pray for me. from where can I find someone who loves me this much?.On such a day, I was talking on the phone with bittuji and got truly frustrated, when by mistake without seeing I broke our marriage photo. I was shocked myself and the whole blood in my body drained out seeing her at the door. She was about to break down , so I ran towards her to explain what had really happened when she came back with a first aid box to bandage my wound which even I had not noticed. That much was her love for me. I realized her worth only when she left me . she was the only one who loved me truly and I lost her, the ones whom I trusted more than me had betrayed me".

He said crunching his eyes to stop the tears. Now he felt relaxed after unburdening himself. madhu was struggling hard to fight her tears. She was happy that atlast he opened up to someone.

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