Arshi FF: The Broken Hearts #3 NEW LINK ADDED pg 146 - Page 4

Chapter 21

Sia happily bounced on her new chair and slammed her hands on the small table before her.
" she likes it." Khushi said glancing at Arnav.
Arnav deposited his hands in his pockets and nodded. " it's sturdy..what about the height, is it okay?"
" Yes, it seems so." Khushi replied.
Arnav then glanced toward the toys section. " now swing and slide."
Khushi furrowed her brows. What was the need to buy swing and slide, when they could easily go to a park and make Sia play?
" you're serious?"
" absolutely." He picked up Sia from the chair and took her to toys area.
With so many toys surrounding them, Sia just couldn't contain her excitement. As though she was in a paradise. She clapped her hands and started jumping in Arnav's arms, eager to be put down.
Arnav sat her on the slide. Then both Khushi and Arnav held her hands and slowly brought her down. Her eyes widened in surprise and she let out a squeal. On reaching down she peered up at Arnav, raised both her arms in the air and began bouncing on her hips, wanting him to repeat this new activity.
Arnav and Khushi again slid her down the slide, this time more confidently and Sia simply threw her head back and laughed louder.
" shona, let's go for the swing." Arnav pointed toward it.
He placed her on the swing then buckled her securely. Khushi who was standing behind, slowly pushed the swing. Sia covered her mouth with her tiny hand, this was even better. Later she curled her fingers around the rope and moved her legs in a to and fro motion as Khushi pushed a little harder. Arnav took out his cell phone to make a video.
Sia giggled and shook her head in sheer joy. Playing on the slide and the swing was new for her and she thoroughly enjoyed the experience. So much that Khushi found it difficult to get her off the swing, only after bribing Sia with a chocolate did she reluctantly came into Khushi's arms.
Arnav had a proud and satisfied grin on his face, he knew Sia would definitely like all this. He took out his wallet to make the payment.
" deliver all this at this address, at the earliest." He passed his card to the cashier. " how much?"
The amount quoted by the cashier , dropped Khushi's jaw. " fifty thousand?? Is he selling us the whole shop or just these three toys?"
" Khushi this is the best shop in town , their products are of high quality..so it's a little expensive." He tried to calm her down.
" but still Arnav ji, just for these three small little things he's asking fifty thousand! Seriously fifty thousand." She repeated the figure, as if by repeating the value of fifty thousand would change.
" it's okay. Don't worry." He took out his credit card but Khushi stopped him. " at least bargain before paying." Arnav smiled down at her. " no need."

Khushi held his hands. " wait. You hold Sia..let me handle this." He must be Arnav Singh Raizada, embarrassed to bargain but she was Khushi and she didn't care what the cashier thought of her.
Taking Sia, Arnav stepped aside. He knew there was no point in holding back Khushi, she wouldn't stop.
Khushi took a deep breath, held her chin high and asked, " so how much discount are you offering?"
" ma'am, the usual, five percent."
Khushi gaped at him. " five percent on fifty thousand..you know how much that is? Just twenty-five hundred..that's too less." She glanced at Arnav who raised his eye brow, why did she feel that her math was weak? That was quick and correct.
Khushi turned to the cashier. " give us at least twenty percent."
Now the cashier turned wide eyed before shaking his head. " sorry ma'am, that's against our policies."
" fifteen percent or else we don't buy anything." She hesitantly glanced at Sia, she knew that Sia wasn't understanding a thing but still she felt that Sia was looking at her very closely. Khushi blinked her eyes in reassurance, her maasi would get her the toys but without blowing up the money like her pa. Sia could trust her.
" sorry ma'am..but." the cashier wasn't agreeing.
Arnav wanted to step in and pay but after a very long time he was watching Khushi bargain and he was absolutely enjoying it.
" okay fine then we leave." Khushi turned slightly and the cashier looked at Arnav. " sir.."
Khushi glared at Arnav, he better agree with her.
" yeah...let's go somewhere else." He played along with Khushi.
" no, ma'am please stop." And Khushi winked at Arnav, surprising him.
" fifteen percent as you say." With a very heavy heart he agreed.
" well do you see that horse?" Khushi pointed at a rocking horse .
" that big one?" The cashier asked.
Khushi rolled her eyes. " it's not as big as a real horse but yeah that one..give it as a complementary gift."
Now this was getting too much, Arnav intervened and handed out his credit card. " fifteen percent is fine."
Khushi knitted her brows and pouted, God only knew how he ran his business!

" Khushi, the driver will drop you both home...I have a luncheon meeting here." Arnav said after coming out of the shop.
Khushi who was still disappointed with him, was staring at the horse, had he not intervened her Sia would be happily sitting on it.
" Khushi." He called to seek her attention.
" what is this Arnav ji, today is Sunday and you're working? This is not right." She pursed her lips to show her disappointment.
Her annoyance somewhat surprised Arnav. He stared at her, why was she reacting like that?
Khushi instantly sensed his confusion and regretted her behavior. " I mean Sia must be looking forward to spend time with you." Yeah she was concerned for Sia...nothing else. Right, she was upset for Sia.. hmm only Sia.
Arnav gave a sound kiss to Sia on her cheek. " shona, I'll wrap up the meeting in two hours. Then we'll have the whole evening to play." Sia grinned and wriggled her nose against his. It had become their thing.
Arnav handed her to Khushi. " call me when you reach home."
Khushi nodded. " but I still feel, we could have got that horse for free."
Arnav couldn't stop himself from laughing. " enough Khushi. Now go home."

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Khushi knocked at his door.
" come in." Arnav said looking up from his laptop. Khushi moved to his table. " coffee."
" thanks. But why did you bother?"
" I was making tea for myself so thought of making coffee for you as well." While handing him the mug her eyes fell on his computer screen that had a bottle of champagne on it.
" you drink?" She cringed as she asked in surprise.
He took a sip of his coffee.
" no, I don't. But why that unpleasant look on your face?"
Khushi shrugged her shoulders. " I don't know, but the thought of alcohol somewhat disgusts me...it doesn't make me feel good."

She pondered over the thought. " does it have something to do with my past?" She suddenly asked. Arnav had the answer, her troubled childhood, but he couldn't tell her.
" leave it. How would you know about my past." Once again a sense of disappointment engulfed her. So many years of her life had erased from her memory. Would she ever remember those forgotten years?
Arnav noticed how sadness spread across her face. He wished he could wipe it off..but he was helpless.
" tomorrow is Payal and Aakash's wedding anniversary..Aakash happens to be my lawyer as well." He tried to distract her.
Khushi raised her head and blinked.
" they are celebrating it in Bali. So I'm sending them some gifts. Hope they are delivered on time."
" tomorrow is 14th Feb.." Khushi said.
Arnav entered his credit card details and nodded. " yeah they got married on Valentine's day."
Khushi smiled. " how romantic..must be love marriage."
" hmm they were so much in love that they didn't even wait to get professionally settled..just took the vows."
Khushi sipped her tea. " when you're in love, then you don't think about money and profession."
Arnav's eyes immediately shot up hearing her view. She might have lost her memory, but the real Khushi in her wasn't forgotten. Her views on love were still the same.
" but Khushi don't you think money is important to meet the hardships of life?"
" it's important but if you have someone by your side then even without money, hardships become easier to face. Moreover money can't guarantee you a happy and a peaceful life but definitely love can."
Her words were true, but they were like acid droplets, burning his heart. Life taught him all this, but in a very harsh way. How badly today he wished, he had listened to Khushi and not left her. What would have happened, he wouldn't be sitting in this palatial house or maybe he could have had something bigger than this...who knew? Anything could have happened. But one thing heart could vouch for, he would have had Khushi with her, loving him with all her heart.
" Arnav ji, how does it feel to be in love?" Just like every person and incident in her life was forgotten, so was this wonderful emotion.
Arnav glanced at her with pain in his eyes. A person who had drowned herself in true and selfless love, was asking how it felt to be in love? Through her love, she made him feel special, she made him realize how meaningless and empty life could be without this emotion. What could he tell her about love when she herself taught him how to love.
" have you ever been in love?" The words were out of her mouth before she knew.
" yeah." He replied softly.
" and then?"
" I lost her to my selfishness. I didn't value her love."
The way he said it, Khushi could see guilt , regret and ache in his eyes...and something more.
" do you still love her?"
Arnav let out an audible sigh. " I do. In fact now when I think about it, I feel in the past I loved her but at a very superficial level..it wasn't deep..it wasn't real." Khushi didn't know how to react. His answers had surprised her. One moment She felt a pang of jealousy, she didn't know why and the next moment she felt sorry for him.
" and now, what do you feel for her?"
Arnav smiled. " now I love her much more than before." He had never thought that one day he would admit this to Khushi. Life was so unpredictable!
Khushi forced a smile and lowered her gaze. " Lavanya must be very lucky."
" I never loved her!"
Khushi's eyes shot up. All along she thought he was talking about his wife...but she was mistaken.
Before she could ask more, Sia's cry , distracted her mind.
" I think she's woken up." She said before leaving to see Sia.

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Next day Arnav had called people from the pest control to render their services so Khushi and Sia had to spend a few hours out.
Taking Sia in a pram Khushi decided to stroll in a nearby park. As she walked down the road, she noticed that today all the florists had their shops packed with customers. It was Valentine's day and everyone was eager to buy roses of different colors. Even small children at the traffic lights were busy selling roses. The shops were decorated with red and white colored heart shaped balloons. She smiled seeing many girls dressed in red. Surely they must be having someone special in their lives.
It was a pleasant winter evening and Khushi was enjoying lazily walking in the park with Sia. It had shady trees and green lawns and a row of sunflowers catching Sia's attention. While Sia admired nature's beauty, Khushi closely watched the people who had gathered.
A little far away there was a young couple maybe in their late teens, the boy went down on one knee and offered a red rose to the girl, obviously she was overjoyed and readily accepted the rose. Khushi wondered, love must be an amazing emotion..though Arnav didn't tell her how it felt to be in love but definitely it must be a great feeling. Her mind once again questioned her, did she ever fall in love? Was she ever fortunate to have love in her life? She didn't know why but the absence of love, made her heart feel empty. With no family and friends by her side, the desire to love and be loved, only deepened. Especially on a day like today when people were celebrating love, she too wished to experience that emotion.
She saw a group of young girls laughing and dancing with balloons in their hands. It wasn't just about lovers even friends used this day to enjoy and show their love for each other. Sadly she didn't even have a friend to share her feelings with.
Though Arnav often listened to her and listened quite patiently but still she felt that sometimes he withheld things from her. He wasn't as expressive as she would have wanted. Perhaps he took her as an employee or maybe some other reason but with him she had to push him to take things out of him. The comfort level was there no doubt, which was why she could speak her mind...but he often seemed hesitant, she wondered why?
Maybe it had something to do with his broken marriage or lost love, that he had erected a wall, a glass wall around him. Where she could see him, see his pain and loneliness but she failed to reach out to him.
While talking about love, she had seen deep sadness in his eyes, as though something was eating him up. But what?
And why did he say that he lost his love to his selfishness? He always came across as a very caring and giving person..he, selfish? It was hard to imagine and believe.
God, why was it so difficult to understand him?
The question made Khushi smile to herself. She was wondering why it was difficult to understand him when she was finding it tough to understand her own self. In the last few days her thoughts were only confusing her already confused mind. For instance, why his physical proximity had her palms sweating? And seeing his wife call up, why did it upset her..after all she was his wife and she had every right to speak to him. Then why was she so curious to know about his love life? Why did she secretly wish that he was no longer in love? Without knowing who his lady love was, she was surprisingly envious of her. And after knowing that he loved someone but was heartbroken , why did it twist her heart? The jealousy disappeared and suddenly she could feel his ache and grief.
Khushi shook her head in defeat.. this was all so complicated.
" Sia, let's go back home before your maasi goes crazy."

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Khushi saw Arnav's car parked outside, so he was home. She went inside and found the hall empty, perhaps he was in his room or study. Khushi took a deep breath, there was no smell of pesticides...strange. Nevertheless she carried Sia to their room.
" time to get your night clothes on, before we start the dinner." She told Sia, before pushing open the room.
" oh my god!" The words instantly left her mouth that now hung open.
Both Khushi and Sia entered the room in a daze. Their eyes refused to stop at one spot, they wandered all over the place.
" like what you see?" Arnav whispered from behind, making Khushi jump.
She slowly blinked her eyes. " are you kidding me?" She asked in disbelief. Was this her room?
Satin drapes in white and red hung from the bed. Balloons of the same color covered the entire floor area. Small chocolates were arranged in the shape of a heart on the bed. Red roses were stuck on the cupboard and the mirror. There was a huge teddy bear sitting in Sia's crib.
What was all this? Before Khushi could figure out, she felt something light and soft falling on her. She looked up and smiled as rose petals fell on her and Sia from the ceiling fan. Sia clapped in excitement, surely they were celebrating something, but didn't know what?
Arnav pushed a small cart in the room and Khushi's grin only widened on seeing a chocolate cake placed on it.
" Happy Valentine's day." Arnav wished.
Sia started bouncing in Khushi's arms on seeing the cake, she just couldn't wait to dig in. And Khushi, she was speechless.
Arnav waited and waited for her to break her silence...And finally she did.
" who did all this?" Khushi asked.
" HP."
" really?"
Arnav rolled his eyes. " duh. Of course I did..for you and sia. But honestly speaking I have done this for the first time so not sure how's it come out."
Khushi had her eyes go moist, before coming back home, she was dismayed that she was alone and had no family or friends to celebrate this day but he made her day.
" Arnav ji, it's perfect." The fact that he arranged all this for the first time and that too for her and Sia, made it even more special.
" but when did you..." She stopped midway, again she was about to ask a silly question. Obviously he decorated the room when she was out with Sia and pest control was just an excuse to send them away.

Sia was slightly confused , she didn't know what to attack first , cake , balloons, teddy bear or chocolates? All seemed equally tempting .

" now before Sia, jumps on the cake, can you please cut it?"
Khushi smiled and nodded as Arnav took Sia from her so that she could cut the cake.
Sia giggled and began clapping. Khushi cut out a piece and fed Sia then glanced at Arnav, hesitant to offer him the cake. Would he eat from her hands? She gulped before slowly moving her hand toward him. Arnav opened his mouth and took a bite. Khushi pressed her lips and smiled.
" Sia, now it's our turn to feed maasi." Arnav took another piece, handed it to Sia then holding her hand fed Khushi.
" thank you so much, Arnav ji." She was overjoyed and couldn't figure out how to contain this happiness.
" there's more." Arnav smiled and Khushi, frowned, what more?
Arnav walked near the window and pulled the curtain. There were two shopping bags and that rocking horse they had seen in the mall, hiding behind.
Khushi covered her open mouth in surprise...he was simply amazing.
He handed her the shopping bags before making Sia sit on the horse. She laughed as the horse rocked.
" Arnav ji, why so much?" His sweet gestures warmed her heart.
" you see that smile on Sia's face? Anything for that."
Khushi smiled and looked at Sia with adoration in her moist eyes...yes anything for that lovely smile.
" but these gifts, they weren't needed."
" maybe not. But I couldn't stop myself from buying them for you both...you two are special to me."
Khushi wiped a lone tear hanging at the corner of her eye. " Arnav ji, thank you once again...thanks for this surprise ."
I love you khushi, I wish I'd done this before , he told himself.

" the pleasure is all mine." And indeed the pleasure was all his. What he did was not to correct his past mistakes ...it wasn't out of guilt but love that he harbored for her.

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February 14, 20xx
' Valentine's day' a day to celebrate and show love. Something I haven't done in the past. But today celebrating it with Khushi and Sia, this day has become special for me. Now I realize what pleasure you get when you make your loved ones feel special.
After making an excuse that I have a lunch appointment, I went shopping in the mall. Buying stuff for both of them was truly enjoyable, however blowing the balloons and decorating the room with drapes and roses, felt a little odd. But seeing those broad smiles on their faces, made everything worth it.
Years ago, Khushi wanted to celebrate this day, she wanted to celebrate our togetherness but I didn't give it much importance. For me it was silly and childish. But then when did I take Khushi and her love seriously? I was fortunate that she came into my life but I failed to value her.
With Lavanya it was never love. Since she was a lot like me so I thought eventually I would fall in love but I didn't realize that loving a self centered person like me is not easy. Everyone can't be innocent and selfless like Khushi and I was certainly not her. So back in New York the idea of celebrating Valentine's day never crossed my mind. Though I had seen shops crowded with people, buying gifts for their loved ones but I hadn't thought that one day I would join them and experience this amazing feeling.
It was Khushi's dream that I made this day special for her and today after doing it I feel nice. The shine in her eyes and that delight on her face warmed my heart. Now when I think and look back, I feel that her dreams and desires were so simple and beautiful like her..I guess if I had fulfilled them back then, then today things would have been different. Our lives would have been different.
The sense of loss in her eyes that I had seen in the study, would have been missing. It really twisted my heart to see how badly she wished to have love in her life...she desired to experience this beautiful emotion and wished to have someone who would treasure her and shower his love on her.
Today I deeply love her and truly value her but I can't be that fortunate someone, who could give her the joy that she desired and deserved.
The love in my heart will have to stay hidden and buried. It didn't deserve to be expressed and shared. The heart that beats in joy on seeing her smile will have to beat alone. And the eyes that tear up on seeing her crying will have to weep alone.

But why do I feel, things between us are changing? I'm not the only one who has to curb his feelings around her...somewhere I guess she's also getting affected by my presence and absence. Her nervousness while speaking to me, her annoyance on Lavanya calling me and her disappointment on knowing that I love someone, suggest something...Something that I'm dreading.
Is she again falling for me?

Thanks for reading

Rose