A/N: So this takes place immediately after the last episode of EDKV...I still can't believe it's over, I got so emotionally invested in this show and I guess writing is basically the only way I'm gonna be able to deal with it's conclusion. There were a lot of loose ends I wanted tied up, but since we didn't get that, I've just written out scenes where ShraMan talk things out and work through their misunderstandings and issues and explore this new phase of their relationship together.
This was initially a one-shot, but I'm turning it into a short story, though I'm not sure how many parts there'll be to it as yet. The links to the following parts will be at the end of this post.
If you'd like me to PM you when I update, please do send me a buddy request! :)
Part 1 | Pillow Talk
Sumo paused in the bathroom, glancing at her reflection. There. Something was missing in her eyes.
It took her a moment to figure out what it was, but then she realized. She'd lost the loneliness in her eyes. They looked brighter, now. Happier. Clearer.
Loneliness was a look she'd become accustomed to...she'd worn it immediately after her parents' death...after Shravan had left ten years ago...and then again, after he'd renounced all ties with her. She hated it. It was the look of an orphan, of an abandoned child. However, after today's events, she doubted she'd wear that look ever again.
"Sumo!" Shravan knocked at the bathroom door. Her heart gave out an unexpected lurch at hearing her name on his lips. Not Suman. Sumo.
"I'm coming, I'm coming," she mumbled, unlocking the door to allow him entrance. He didn't hurry past her like expected, though, he just smiled at her and stood where he was. She stared up at him, confused and slightly self-conscious as he continued to just look at her. It wasn't as though she was looking especially pretty - she'd washed her face clean of makeup, she was in the same blue nightgown she'd worn only two nights before, he'd seen her wearing it - and yet, he was examining her as though he'd never seen her before in his life.
She raised her eyebrows in silent inquiry, but he only smiled and shook his head, before heading into the bathroom.
She walked slowly towards the bed, biting her lower lip. It certainly hadn't seemed so...well...small before. Of course, she'd given Shravan some playful instructions that afternoon about her taking the right side and him taking the left...but somehow, she doubted that order would stay in place for the remainder of their marriage...
They really hadn't any chance to do anything yet. Shravan had barely set her down on her feet when the rest of the family had burst into the room, all laughter and smiles. She'd endured some expected good-natured teasing from Pushkar and Preeti and then Kamini Chachi had insisted they all go eat dinner as a family. Shravan had immediately reached out to clasp her hand in his, as though fearful she'd slip away as soon as he lost sight of her, and he hadn't let go. Not even as they ate; he'd only eaten with his spoon in his left hand instead, much to his cousins' mirth. The taunts and teasing didn't stop him, however. He was far too happy for that.
Sumo didn't think she'd ever seen him so happy as he'd been today. And that happiness only added to her own. It still seemed so unreal, like she was living out a dream. She was Mrs. Shravan Malhotra. And there was no falsity in the title. Shravan loved her. He needed her.
She was startled out of her thoughts with the sound of the bathroom door opening and Shravan emerging in his black tank and sweats. She couldn't help herself - she just stared. She loved the sight of his arms, they were strong and taut with pure lean muscle, rippling with every lithe movement. The same arms that held her, that caught her, that lifted her with ease. The arms that would never let her fall.
He cleared his throat and she looked up, blushing a little, to find him looking at her with a quirked brow, mimicking her own expression when he'd been staring at her. She shook her head, smiling, looking away, her thoughts finding purchase in the sudden, stark realization that this man would be sleeping next to her tonight. As her husband.
He'd slept next to her before, but that was different. That hadn't been the Shravan "she'd known", as he had put it. That Shravan had been cloaked in anger and hate. This Shravan wore his heart on his sleeve and the broad smile on his face as he sat down on the bed next to her made her heart do strange, fluttery things.
He reached out for the hand that was in her lap and threaded his fingers through hers slowly. She liked the way their fingers looked intertwined, his larger hand engulfing her smaller one - they just fit against each other so well. "I love you," he murmured softly, as though she could've forgotten.
She smiled, reaching out to brush the back of her fingers against the hair at the nape of his neck, just because she could. "I love you, too." It felt so refreshing to say it, as though she was letting go of something she'd held onto reluctantly for far too long. He looked at her for a long moment, leaning into her touch, before turning around, cross-legged on the bed to face her, grasping both of her hands in his, "Let's play a game."
"A game?" she raised an eyebrow, turning as well to mimic his pose.
"Mmhmm," he nodded, "I have to ask you three questions and you have to answer them all truthfully."
She smiled, knowing very well where he'd gotten the idea from. "Alright," she shrugged, "But I get to ask you three questions as well. And I get to go first."
"Deal," he grinned.
"Okay..." she pretended to think for a moment, though she already had a question in mind, "When did you realize you were in love with me? Not the first time, when we were kids, but after you'd come back...or was it always there?"
"That's an easy one," he chuckled, running his thumb over her wrist and eliciting an unexpected shiver from her. He stopped, looking at her in surprise; she blushed and bit her lower lip. He'd held her hand so many times before, but something was different now. There was something so achingly tender about the way he played with her fingers. A slow smile crept to his lips, as he let go of one hand to cup one in both of his and continued to lightly stroke across the small expanse of skin, watching her expression, as he continued to speak, "It was always there, honestly, I'd just kept it buried away, locked in the same place I kept my fear of abandonment, of getting my heart broken again. When I opened myself up to you, asked to be friends with you and set the past aside...I was also trying to set my past love aside," he swirled the pad of his thumb gently across the palm of her hand and she sucked in a sharp breath. She opened her mouth to say something as the realization crashed around her, yet again, of how much she'd hurt him in the past, but he shook his head and continued, "Obviously, it didn't work...Remember when we went out for dinner? And you told me that story about your so-called college crush? I was jealous...so jealous...you were right, I didn't like the story...and then I began to fear my own feelings...I was in denial. I didn't want to love you, I didn't want to expose my vulnerabilities and take a risk again...but then, when you told me how much you trusted me that night at the party, I realized I'd fallen for you, completely, and there was no going back."
"That was the night you realized?" she whispered on a gulp, now stopping the movement of his fingers, holding them tightly with hers. That had been the night before...
"The night before I met my mother, yes," he nodded. The word sounded so foreign on his tongue...to finally accept Nirmala as his mother after so many years...and it was only because of the beautiful, strong woman before him. "I had intended to tell you everything that day, but then..."
"I'm so, so sorry," she whispered, as the horrifying realization hit her of how deeply he'd been hurt that day. It hadn't simply been that she had been involved in getting Nirmala to meet him...it had been a repeat of sorts for him, after a decade...being betrayed by the girl he loved yet again. He had taken that risk, he'd been ready to expose himself at his most vulnerable...and unknowingly she'd trampled over his heart all over again... "I'm sorry," she said again, as though somehow the words would help; she cupped his face with her hands, inching forward - his hands still held onto hers.
"Why are you apologizing?" he shook his head, "You didn't know. You weren't at fault. You were only trying to bring me happiness, to reunite me with my mother...if anything, it's only made me love you more. Knowing how much you wanted me to be happy." He moved his face slightly between her hands to steal a soft kiss from her palm and she closed her hand around it, pulling back, as though she could keep it there. "You're not at fault," he repeated, "Don't blame yourself for that. Besides, it's my turn to ask the question now, Mrs. Malhotra."
She loved he way he said her name. Without artifice or derision, he rolled the name under his tongue in deliberate thought as though making it clear that she was his and he loved her.
"Alright, Mr. Malhotra," she smiled back, propping her chin up with their entwined hands, "Ask away."
"Preeti told me you've loved me since childhood...but I want to know everything from you. I want to know everything and I want to hear you say it...when did you realize you loved me?"
She ducked her head down in thought, "I definitely wasn't as quick to catch on as you were when we were kids...I only realized after you left...it just made sense, it clicked in a way. I missed you so much, you were the only person on my mind and I couldn't let go of my guilt, knowing that everything was my fault and I'd been absolutely horrible to you. But I couldn't let go of my ego enough to reach out to you...to give you a call or a message...I knew I had hurt you a lot and I was scared that you might not forgive me even if I tried to apologize. I always kept tabs on you, though," she chuckled in slight embarrassment, "I'd stalk you on Facebook, scroll through your pictures and posts, but I was too scared to send out a friend request and only get ignored."
"If it makes you feel any better, I'd stalk your account, too," he laughed.
"And then when you came back, well, obviously I couldn't tell you I loved you when you were still so angry with me. And then you stressed how good friends we were afterwards and then I didn't want to tell you either, unless I was sure you felt the same way. Blame it on my ego," she shrugged, then felt a small pang of remorse, "I did let my ego get the better of me...lots of times..."
"Shhh...that doesn't matter now," he shook his head, pondering her for a second before scooping her up in one quick motion and settling her onto his lap.
"Shravan!" she giggled in surprise, grasping onto his bare shoulders for balance.
"You were too far away," was his reasoning, adjusting her so she sat more comfortably atop him, her legs to one side of his lap and his arms wrapped around her waist. "Hmm..." he pressed his chin to her shoulder, "I guess it's your turn to ask now?"
It took her a moment for his words to seep through the rational, working part of her brain, she was so overwhelmed with him, his heat surrounding her, how close they were to each other, how warm his skin was under her fingers... "Sumo?" he prodded, as the silence stretched on.
"Mm? Oh, yes, it is," she pushed her hair back behind her ear, a little flushed.
"Sumo, are you blushing?" Shravan sounded positively delighted.
"No, I'm not," she poked him, averting eye contact.
"You are!" he crowed, "Who'd have thought this day would come...Sumo blushing..."
"It's your fault," she muttered and he stopped chuckling, looking at her in a way that made her feel very warm, "Is it?"
"I'm sitting in your lap," she stated.
"So you are," he made no attempt to displace her, "I certainly don't mind, do you?" he teased.
"I'm just going to ask my question now," she gave up, reconciling herself to the fact that yes, she was sitting on his lap, and no, she didn't mind one bit. At sudden inspiration, she asked, "That day...at the coffee shop...you wanted me to meet you...what did you want to tell me?"
He sighed ruefully, "I was going to tell you I loved you, actually."
Her heart sank, "And I didn't come."
"You didn't come," he agreed, "And I decided not to tell you I loved you until you asked me why I wanted you to meet me there. Why didn't you come?"
She swallowed. She knew his father had told him of his involvement in separating them from each other, but she was entirely sure how he'd deal with being fully aware of all the facts. "Uncle...um..."
"Papa told you to stay away from me?" he asked quietly.
"Not exactly..." she sighed, fiddling with the ties of her nightgown, "He came to me with a blank cheque. He said that if I agreed to stay away from you, he would accept Preeti as a part of the family and he would pay for the wedding costs too...I didn't take the cheque, but I wanted Preeti and Pushkar to be happy, so..."
"So you sacrificed your own happiness."
"And yours too, in the process," she looked up at him.
"You didn't know I loved you..."
"But maybe I should have put more faith in you," she countered.
"Let's not play the blame game now," Shravan shook his head, "It doesn't matter. You're here now."
"On your lap."
"On my lap," he agreed, tightening his arms around her and tilting his forehead to hers, taking a deep inhalation, as though breathing her in, reassuring himself of her presence. He pulled back slightly, "My turn."
"You already asked why I didn't show up to the coffee shop," she pointed out.
"Fine, fine. Go on, then."
She hesitated for a moment and then asked, "Why did you tell Aditya you'd slept with me?"
He stiffened and wouldn't meet her eyes, "I was an idiot."
"That's been established," she said lightly, playing with the ends of his hair to soften her words.
"Honestly...I was jealous and I was angry. He kept asking me about the "past" of our relationship. It was annoying at first, but then my mother approached me...she didn't want me to do anything to disrupt your marriage, ruin his happiness...and that was it. I wanted to make him doubt himself...and in a way, I wanted him to know that there was no other man for you but me. It was wrong and selfish and stupid, but I said it anyway."
"Well, you were right about one thing," she murmured.
"What's that?"
"There's no other man for me, but you," she said simply, waiting until he looked up at her directly and then continued, "When I confronted you about what you said...I didn't mean it when I said it was "shameful" for my name to be tied with yours...I was just so angry. Angry that you felt the need to lie about me and then how you took no responsibility for your actions. And after that, I guess...my anger started overriding everything else too. I said a lot of hurtful things...I brought up your mother's dhal...basically shoved it in your face in front of everyone, just to hurt you. And that wasn't right either."
"We're a mess."
"We are," she admitted, "But we'll be okay. Everything's okay now."
He nestled his face into her neck breathing deeply, his stubble tickling her collarbone, "I still have to ask...why did you accept PCT from Aditya, but not me...why did you agree to marry him?"
"I know I was rude to you...I could've turned down your help in a far nicer way, or at least explained it to you better...but I don't like accepting money from anyone, Shravan. I've always wanted to manage my business independently. I only accepted PCT from Aditya after he said he would be my investor. I had no issue with a business contract, and to be honest, I thought you had sent him and you were trying to help me without letting me know. Beyond that, though...I think I've been so hesitant to accept help from you because I've always felt guilty over how I treated you when we were kids. I used you. I'd make you do my homework, carry my things...I wanted to show you I wasn't that kind of person anymore. Does that make sense?"
He nodded, "I wanted to help you, though. I mean, when we were kids, that was the only way I could express my feelings for you, and to have you constantly turn me down for it, felt like I was being rejected for loving you. I understand your reasoning now, though. We've just hit so many misunderstandings, they've just all muddled up."
"Me getting married to Aditya was another misunderstanding, of sorts," she replied ruefully, "After you told me everything between us was "finished", Nanu had a heart attack and then his health was really bad. He wanted to make sure that even after he left, I'd still have someone there for me. He wanted me to get married. And Nirmala Aunty had suggested I marry Aditya. I couldn't very well tell Nanu I was in love with you and he wouldn't accept the fact that I simply just didn't want to marry Aditya. He didn't understand why I wouldn't want to marry him and be a part of a nice family and...well...he was so sick, I wanted him to calm down, so in the moment I didn't really have a choice. I agreed and then I didn't have a chance to back down...in a way, it was a good thing, I suppose, that you told Aditya what you did...or else I wouldn't have seen that side of him until after marriage," she shuddered and Shravan pulled her closer.
"He's a bas***d. I could've killed him for touching you," Shravan muttered, "I never thought what I said could've provoked him into -"
"There's no justifying what he did," Sumo interrupted calmly, "And you saved me before anything could really happen."
"What if I didn't though? What if I was too late?" he said softly, the thought tormenting him.
"Hey, shhh...stop thinking of the "what ifs"," she stopped him, lifting up his chin, "Okay? It's done, it's over."
"I love you," he blurted out, the words raw and honest and open, leaning his forehead into hers, "I want to fix everything I've done wrong."
"You've fixed everything already, just like that," she smiled, "Just by loving me and letting go."
"I'm not letting go of you, though. Not ever," he emphasized his words by falling back into the bed with her still on top of him, a giggling mess of tangled limbs and arms.
"I think I can live with that," she beamed down at him, propped up by her arms on his chest, "After ten years, it's the least you could do."
"I can finally do all the things I've wanted to for ten years too," he grinned back wolfishly.
She hit him playfully, "Shravan Malhotra, I believe we have an arrangement - this side of the bed is mine, that side is yours," she pointed.
"Screw the bed arrangement, the entire room is yours, remember," he pulled her down closer, his fingers tangled in her hair and the room fell silent, but for the sounds of their deep breathing. His thumb stroked down along the side of her face and she stared down at him, taking him in...his beautifully angled face, the contours of his cheekbones shaded with scruff, his eyes looking back at her with so much love and trust and happiness...It was his smile that did it - it was so adorably boyish, she could see him then, she could see her Shravan from their childhood behind that smile. And it was that smile that made her duck down just a little closer to meet his mouth with hers.
She meant to simply brush her mouth against his, just a tender, sweet acquaintance of lips, but he seemed to have other ideas, holding her in place with his fingers tangled in her hair. He drew her mouth over his in tantalizing little sweeps, cautiously, as though testing unknown waters. Tugging at her lower lip and then the upper, exploring and tasting, making little sounds like he did when she gave him delicious treats to sample. And then before she knew it, she was kissing him back, as though he'd taught her the way of it, like how he had taught her to do her sums...patiently, thoughtfully, provoking her to learn the exercise without her quite realizing how he'd managed to do it. Each kiss lingered a little longer than the last, one of them would pull back to catch their breath, only to pull the other back into it. She smiled against his mouth at a sudden thought.
"What?" he murmured, his voice low and shaky.
"All this time...could've been spent doing this instead..."
He caught his breath on a half-growl, half-chuckle, "If that'd been the case, we would've gotten married within at least a week after I'd returned...not that I'd complain, actually..." his tongue darted into her open mouth and she let out a soft moan. She was flushed and warm and intensely aware of his body under hers and how very flimsy and thin her nightgown was. Her hands floated over his shoulders and arms as the kiss deepened and lengthened and his found her waist, pressing her flush against him. He didn't do anything else, however, only kissed her, his hands never straying any further. She knew how much he wanted her, she could feel it in the sharply coiled strength in his arms and the way he kissed her, the hard pressure between her legs...and yet he held himself back.
After some minutes...she wasn't entirely sure how long it had been, he flipped her over on her back and turned on his side, still holding her, but not kissing her. "What?" she asked, her voice husky from disuse.
He closed his eyes tightly, taking in deep breaths, "I think we should go to sleep...it's been a long day..."
"Oh. Okay," she tried not to let the disappointment seep into her tone, but he must've heard it anyway because he opened his eyes and curled her body more closely into his, "It's late...we both have to go to work tomorrow..."
"What if I don't go?" she blurted out, taking him by surprise. "I...um...I don't have to go tomorrow..."
He surveyed her for a long moment, before sighing with visible reluctance, "Would you disagree with me if I said I wanted to take this slowly? I want you, I do...but I love you more. I want us to start over, as though our relationship had played out the way it should have..."
"No, I'd like that," she smiled, caressing the skin under his jaw, "I'd like that very much."
"To be honest, I'm not entirely sure how long I'll last..." he chuckled, "But I do want to try. We can try being a normal, unmarried couple...who just happen to live in the same house and sleep in the same bed..."
"I bet you'll break before I do," Sumo couldn't resist saying.
"Is that a dare, Mrs. Malhotra?"
"It's Ms. Tiwari to you, now," she grinned and then collapsed into a fit of giggles as he began to tickle her.
Once they'd both sufficiently calmed down, Shravan turned off the lights and pulled the blanket over them, cocooning her into his side with his arm. "Isn't this breaking the rules?" Sumo murmured.
"Well, if you'd prefer to take the couch..." he teased.
"I'm good, thanks," she smiled contently as she closed her eyes, lulled into sleep by his warmth.
"Sumo?"
"Hmm?"
He said it again, just because he wanted it to be the last thing she heard before she fell asleep. "I love you."
Fan Fictions
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Anupamaa
Ye Hai Mohabbatein
