Ishwari is real life sasuma

Guys, we are all going depressed looking at the portrayal of Ishwari's character but this is as close as it gets or rather as scary as it gets... have experienced it first hand...

Such behavior takes huge toll on the girl, specially if she is well educated, financially independent and capable of taking her own decisions...

The in-laws make her feel worthless, incapable and in general good for nothing.. she looses her self-confidence and starts getting insecure if hubby is mama's boy...

In my case, our dinner was delayed beyond 11 pm everyday (after watching all serials) so you can imagine the time spend alone... another issue was, last minute changes to bedrooms when new flat was taken (just before marriage)... in-laws wanted Indian WC and ours was western.. apparently, the WC room was bigger so last minute swapped... so it ended up like, they have to use WC in our room (as gross as it may seem but fact of life)...

I was told on face, you have to adjust with us... you will never get your husband... Even if I have to go out with husband, I had to separately seek their permission.. both had to give salaries to them...

within 4 months, husband got job abroad and we never went back to stay in the same house for more than 10 days during annual vacation...

But the humiliation has stayed with me... It was shocker... We always were told education will change your life for good but frankly it is a myth for many many of us...

I thought so many time to share my life too but stop. After reading ur post i can totally agree of what u just said. 14 years of my marriage living in states independent woman. I had a very bad experience of my life how MIL try to control everything specially if there is a past behind it.
Long story short Ishwari's character is very much common in real life and it can somewhat relate to a mental disorder

Actually such things are not to be shared 9as taught by our parents) but watching this serial has been like a therapy for me... whatever guilt I had about myself on subconscious level, not being perfect and cause of the rift has disappeared...

Thanks...

I AM NEVER GETTING MARRIED OMG! Its so hellish to read such posts I am so sorry if any of you have experienced such things, thats really sad, god bless y'all. I am never marrying anyone, my life will be my career only.

Originally posted by: AngelsFlyAlone

I AM NEVER GETTING MARRIED OMG! Its so hellish to read such posts I am so sorry if any of you have experienced such things, thats really sad, god bless y'all. I am never marrying anyone, my life will be my career only.

Marriage is a wonderful experience...

just make sure you don't get mama's boy.. more importantly, don't try to fit in... the biggest mistake we make... and much more important is to not repeat the same mistake when it is our time...

many ladies do the same as they experienced the same... it is vicious cycle...(saas bhi kabhi bahu thi types)..

I agree Ishwari is just like real life sasuma...and that's why I can't see her cause it brings back all the memories of staying with my Mother-in-Law. I too am a independent, grew up in US, staying in India for few years...and what I faced was so different from everything I have learned and saw in my life. My MIL would bring a havoc if I ever did anything for my hubby as she said he is her son so she is the one who is to take care of everything for him and I am just suppose to mind my own business and not take part in anything as its not necessary as she will do everything. She went as far as telling me that her son would not have enough/good sleep if I slept in the same bed. These are just a bit of the things she would do... I keep on having nightmares...and at times just her name scares me like nothing else has.

Originally posted by: fangirl-rt

Marriage is a wonderful experience...

just make sure you don't get mama's boy.. more importantly, don't try to fit in... the biggest mistake we make... and much more important is to not repeat the same mistake when it is our time...

many ladies do the same as they experienced the same... it is vicious cycle...(saas bhi kabhi bahu thi types)..

Originally posted by: AngelsFlyAlone

I don't need any form of burden. For those who end up happily married with no such nonsense, you are fortunate *touch wood* but honestly if people can relate to this, shame on those MILs who humiliate their DILs like that (no offense intended)! Shame on society for creating this bubble of narrow mindedness which makes people think its okay to be treated that way. UGGHHH I am totally Anti Marriage now. If I am compelled to get married tho, I will opt for contract marriage and the first clause is "We're divorced in advanced".

My dear, you can do all of this if there is a case of arrange marriage... if you end falling in love, you will jump in this yourself... the aftereffects in both cases are the same.. but if it is love marriage, you are bigger culprit... in case of arrange marriage, the girl's family pressure is always there...atleast subconsciously... but in case of love marriage, your hubby is more obliged to parents becoz they approved his choice... many many complexities...

I know of a case where :

Pre-marriage, the guy used to smoke... the girl subtly convinced him to quit over a period of time and he did quit..

The grudge : He didn't quit when we told him, but he did when you said... biwi ka gulam ban gaya...

we were like : one should be happy that their son has quit hazardous habit but the girl never thought it will become ego issue...

One has to pick up such red flags and take decisions appropriate for your future...

Originally posted by: KyunkiImafan

I agree Ishwari is just like real life sasuma...and that's why I can't see her cause it brings back all the memories of staying with my Mother-in-Law. I too am a independent, grew up in US, staying in India for few years...and what I faced was so different from everything I have learned and saw in my life. My MIL would bring a havoc if I ever did anything for my hubby as she said he is her son so she is the one who is to take care of everything for him and I am just suppose to mind my own business and not take part in anything as its not necessary as she will do everything. She went as far as telling me that her son would not have enough/good sleep if I slept in the same bed. These are just a bit of the things she would do... I keep on having nightmares...and at times just her name scares me like nothing else has.

To Fangirl - bathrooms in different rooms...oh no. That's bad. Giving privacy is real issue with MILs. I am glad you don't have to bear the torture anymore. It really does mess up with self worth.