Many of us know that this is not a typical mother-son relationship. Both of them are highly dysfunctional people. They're so co-dependent on each other. And this co-dependency has made Dev overly responsible. He doesn't seem to be able to get out of it. Ishwari because of her situation was forced to put the entire responsibility of the family on Dev's shoulders when he was very young. And Dev became a parent long before he was ready to be one. We've seen Ishwari telling Mamaji, that she herself wasn't sure who the parent was & who was the child. Dev, with the kind of upbringing he's had, the only thing he's learnt to do is to shower unconditional love & support to his mother & his sisters. He has always ended up sacrificing & dedicating his life by putting his family's needs first than his very own needs. And finally, we saw a Dev breaking out from that hold when he fell in love with Sona. All those feelings were completely new to him. Sona is a breath of fresh air in Dev's life. His confession was brilliant, the way he's been cornering & lingering around her gave us all goosebumps..and those amazing dialogues. But amidst all this, his attention to his mother & sisters had diminished little bit. He never ignored them, it's just that he didn't give them top priority & attention. But if you think about it, just like how Ishwari gives full attention & priority to Dev, in the same way he was giving full attention & priority to Sona... I see no difference in them at all. He was transferring the same importance & value that his mother has for him into his relationship as well. Well, you can't blame him for that, because that's what he's learnt from his mother till now... Just like how Ishwari needed Dev all for herself, he was beginning to need Sona all for himself. Like mother, like son! There's no balance at all here. I want Dev to first take care of himself as a separate independent person, without the help of Ishwari or Sona. And when the time comes for Dev & Sona to part ways, I want Dev to yearn for her, not in the obsessive possessive way. But in a way where he experiences a sense of emptiness, longing & the lack of having his true friend.
At the same time, we've Ishwari who has begun to notice that Dev can actually make decisions without sharing it with her first & we can clearly see her discomfort. She can't confront him & say I'm a possessive, insecure needy mother.. Can she? Instead she's using manipulative ways & guilt. She says, "If you spend time with me, I'll be perfectly fine". Isn't she putting the responsibility of her distress on his shoulder again?? And how does Dev react to all this?? He's doesn't know anything else, other than always pleasing his mother. So he just ends up being silent/blank whenever she says anything. This is such a complex situation. And why should we blame Ishwari?? She was young, when her husband died & she was left with four children to look after. What could she have possibly done? She worked, ended up thrusting the family's responsibility on Dev & ended up making Neha the mother of two kids. Was there any other way she could see things work out for her & her children without the presence of a husband & a father? This was the sensible option then but the kind of damage it's done to Dev & Neha is disastrous. Yes, what Dev brought home at the end of the day was only profitable & quantifiable for her & the family and whereas she completely turned a blind eye to recognize Neha's efforts. Just to clarify..were there any flash back scenes where Ishwari was present around Neha when she was looking after Riya & Nikki?? I agree that she didn't equally appreciate the efforts of Dev & Neha & I want her to realize that as the story progresses. A mother's unconditional love & her emotional availability are the most significant & important necessities for a child. And Dev got that in too much abundance from his mother & Neha didn't get half as much Dev did. If the spoilers are true & if Neha comes back... It just proves my point. She cannot function without the support of her family. She's highly dependent on her brother. And in the same way, Dev cannot function without Ishwari & vice versa. Ishwari, Dev & Neha all have flaws & they are so deeply rooted. It's going to be difficult but all of them have to work together to bring about the change in themselves. One person changing alone will not work. It's really sad to see such beautiful people so deeply broken inside. Don't blame Ishwari yet, am sure there's more to her side of her story. And we've got to wait...Khatriji is still hanging in the air... And if Ishwari is going to take out her anger on Sona for the way in which her son is behaving...then yes, please go ahead & blame her. She has no right to do that to Sona. Sona doesn't deserve her wrath. And where does Sona come into this?? Her upbringing says everything about her. Her family is so different, so normal. We've always wondered why they keep showing scenes of the Bose family. They are not mere fillers. They are an example of a happy normal family (Period). It'll be Sona who will be facing this complicated, dysfunctional family. Poor girl. Sona will be broken, but she will pick up the pieces & walk with her head held high. And if she needs to share her feelings with anyone, her entire family will be there for her. Yes, each of them will have their own opinions & suggestions but all of that shows the aspect of moving forward in life. Whereas, the Dixit's don't seem to want to move forward at all.
This was my supposed to be my weekend rant..😕 Kinda late...but never too late to rant I guess.. Hope I don't sound confusing at all. I may be completely wrong in looking at things...This mother son duo has definitely gotten me a little rattled...😕
Kumkum Bhagya
