Amaya lay on the floor looking through the small window above her. The house was in complete calm. She loved this part of the day most. It was devoid of all her sufferings and the cool night would soothe away the pains she experienced during the day. Her husband Mr. Ramashree Gupta lay on the bed, fast asleep. She was thankful that Rama her one time would- be jiju never bothered to think about her or giving her the rights as his wife. She was happy that her family was in peace though she suffered a lot to give them that peace.
Mantu...yes Mantu was one thread she had failed to close in all this planning. He was suffering, no doubt because of her. His pain was palpable. It was evident in his eyes. She could read his questioning eyes. Initially she had thought that Mantu would move on once he starts seeing her as Rama's wife but strangely that never happened. He never acknowledged her as Rama's wife. He was still waiting for an answer. How could she deal with this situation now. She knew very soon she would be asked for answers directly by Mantu. She had to quickly think of a way to handle this else all her hard work would flow down the drain. Yes she will speak to Mantu...tomorrow, she thought.
Next morning Amaya woke up to see a brooding Rama on his bed. She thought of asking but quickly decided against it ,lest he again starts with his love for her didi puran and how she had destroyed all that and the she was fully responsible for his present unhappiness in life. She was not ready for this today. She had to settle Mantu's issues, today. But as she was leaving the room, Rama called her name and she stopped. She turned back with a huff ready to hear his repeated dialogues.
Rama: Amaya, I have a task for you today.
Amaya: (Gosh is he drunk early in the morning.)Haan Boliye...
Rama: I know Mantu is your close friend too like mine. I want you to talk to him about something very important. Are you listening?
Amaya: (How did he know...Did Mantu disclose something to him???) Yeah..I am listening.
Rama: You know that I consider Kangana my own little sister and she is very close to my heart. Yesterday I came to know that she has feelings for Mantu. She told me that she loves him. I spoke to Mantu but he never answered me. Also, he did not lift my phone after that. He is mad at me that I married you upon my mom's insistence and ditched Rachitaji. But he is my true friend. Little does he know that I am not to be blamed but it is you who is the cause of all the problems in my life. You too know all this, right.
Amaya: (Yeap who knows better) I am still listening, please continue...
Rama: So I want you to talk to Mantu and let him understand that I am not to be blamed in this marriage and also you have to convince him for marriage with Kangana. Tell me can you do this?
Amaya: (Almost in tears hearing Kangana loves Mantu)...I will try my best Rama, but can't promise you anything now.
Rama: Listen, I am telling this to you not only because u r Mantu's friend but also because you are bahu of this house and all this now becomes your duty towards our family. Understand.
Amaya never heard anything but kept walking as if in trance outside the room.
At Mantu's House:
Mantu was packing all his belongings. He had already packed Chiklu's stuff. Since he was crying a lot he had left him at his friend's place until he completed packing. It was a tough day for Mantu. He was been constantly called by Rama and Govind Sir. Both had offers for him. One had his sister's hand in marriage to offer while other had a job to offer. But he was not in a situation to accept both. Govind Sir was a long time acquaintance who had started dealership of computers and peripherals at Benaras recently and he wanted an able hand like Mantu.
Rama on the other hand was pestering him with Kangana's proposal. His mind never absorbed what Rama was telling him yesterday. His eyes were fixed on a saree clad Amaya running around her mother-in-law taking orders from her. It pained him see her avoid his gaze. It pained him to think about his love for her. It pained him that she never cared.
What was he waiting for? An answer from Amaya? Is it really worth? Will it make a difference to him? She was gone from his life forever. But his heart was still beating only for her. Anything close to knowing that she did atleast care for him will give his pain a little relief but alas she will not answer. She is changed, changed overnight. It's as if she is not Amaya but some fiction clone creating by some class-less, third rated pathetic serial writer (Please Read Sonali Jaffer here.)
There was knock at the door. Mantu was tired and definitely did not want Rama to show up now. He thought a moment to stay silent but his legs pulled him to the door and he opened it ...and there stood the saree clad clone of Amaya...Amaya Gupta.
Amaya: May I come in Mantu?
Mantu: (Tears brimmed up in his eyes as he thought his Amaya is back just to answer him) Please come in Amaya.
Amaya: (Looking around...seeing things neatly packed)...Are you shifting your house Mantu?
Mantu: (takes a seat far away from Amaya and just keeps looking at her)
Amaya: Sorry Mantu, I think I am disturbing your work. I will quickly tell you why I am here. Rama told me this morning that he wants you and Kangana married. It's that Kangana likes you a lot and she is a very good girl. She will be an apt wife for you Mantu and I am sure you will be very happy with her.
Mantu: (Barely able to register what Amaya was telling him)...Sorry, come again Amaya..
Amaya: Actually...I was telling u that Kangana likes u and Rama wants u and Kangana married...(Amaya stopped... sensing a drastic change in the contour and expression of Mantu)
Mantu moved to packing his things without glancing at Amaya. He went on with his work for the next 30 minutes without a word. The silence was now unbearable to Amaya and she knew it was just the calm before the storm. But she dared not speak a word. She stood in front of Mahadev and offered a silent prayer before opening her mouth again.
Amaya: Mantu...I am waiting for your answer...Actually Rama feels that...
Mantu made a harsh turn towards Amaya and looked in to her eyes. For a minute she thought Mantu's gaze drilled in to her soul and she stood frozen to her spot.
Mantu: Mrs. Amaya Ramashree Gupta, You may please inform your husband that I am not interested in the marriage proposal he has sent through you.
Amaya's felt as if the floor beneath her slipped away. She has never seen such a Mantu before. Blunt, ferocious and uncaring. The uncaring part scared her or wounded her the most but she brushed that aside for a while.
Amaya: Mantu, May I Know why? Kangana is a good girl, well educated and sanskaari. She will be a good companion to you. Life is not to be wasted Mantu. Just because you couldnot get your love doesnot mean you should stop living. You can always live for others.
The last thread of patience that Mantu was hanging on was broken with Amaya's " Living for others" dialogue... He turned around to face Amaya. His eyes cold and stare unnerving...
Mantu: Why should I answer you. Who are you to me Mrs. Amaya Gupta. Who gives you the authority to lecture me on life and living? Do I even need to heed to what you are saying? Actually I am leaving this town for ever. So if you please vacate this place, I can complete my packing and leave.
Amaya felt as if someone slapped her hard. Uncaring is better but this was insulting her. How dare her Mantu insulted her like this. How dare he leave Benaras without bothering to tell her. How dare he talks to her in this tone. She swiftly walked towards Mantu and held him by his collar...
Amaya: How dare you Mantu...How could you be so cruel and talk to me in a tone as if I mean nothing to you. How could you even think of leaving this town without caring to even inform me.
Mantu: (Pushes her hands off him)...Mind you Mrs, Amaya Gupta. Stay in your limits. I am your husband's friend not your husband or lover that you can hold me like this. I hate other women touching me. Why should I tell you that I am leaving Benaras. You loved Rama, got married to him and you are his wife. Please take care of your husband and his family. I live or die should not be of any value to you. Please go away.
Amaya eyes shot up red and she looked at Mantu as if she can stare him down to ashes...
Amaya: What did you just say... You live or die shouldnot make a difference to me. Do you even know what I had gone through, Mantu. Do you know that I loved you more than my life. Do you even know that I had always dreamt of a life with you. Do you even care to know that I wanted to confess my love to you but for your Uma's vachan I held back. Do you know that I ran the Amar Jyothi race just for you and my Mannat was to attain your love in my life. I had fasted for you Mantu and my very life I wanted to spend just loving you.
Amaya dropped to the floor crying unconsolably but Mantu wasn't moved. He wanted the whole story. His weakness now can wreck his idea of provoking Amaya to get the truth out of her. It has worked so far. He had to be strong now.
Amaya looked up at Mantu and saw that Mantu was neither happy at her Love confession nor was he moved by her love. She stood up and walked up to Mantu.
Amaya: Mantu, you don't believe me.
Mantu: There is no reason to believe you because u are Amaya Gupta today. If all your love was true, I think you should have been Amaya Srivatsav????
Amaya: Yes, you are right but my kismat had the worst coming my way Mantu. She elaborated on all that happened between her and Rama's mom. Her giving chloroform to her sister and taking Rachi's place in the mandap. The torchures she had to put up with at her sasural. Rama constantly blaming her for all that had happened and worst of all Rachita being her step sister.
When Amaya had told that all to Mantu she felt very light at heart and tired at the same time. She looked at Mantu who was still unmoved with her part of the story.
Amaya: You still don't believe me Mantu??
Mantu: I believe your story but I can't believe I loved you Amaya Gupta. I am still in shock thinking the fact that I fell for such a stupid women in my life, Amaya Gupta.
Amaya was shell shocked. She did not see this coming from Mantu. Her throat dried up and she trembled to speak.
Mantu looked at Amaya as if he was looking at her for the very first time. He threw up his hand in air out of despair...
Mantu: Was this your own brain work or you had rented out some cheap CDs from chor bazaar for this planning Amaya Gupta???? I mean I can't believe you did all this nonsense and also claim that you did all this for your family. You put forth your family before your love and gave this great sacrifice of love for your family Amaya Gupta????
Amaya: You would not understand Mantu. You will never understand because you never had a family. I can never see my family in grief. I love them beyond all.
Mantu now folded his hands and stood with a faint sarcastic smile on his face.
Mantu: Ok Mrs. Amaya Gupta, please answer a few questions for me...
Amaya: Yes
Mantu: Is your family happy? I mean is Rachita, Sneha aunty, Jazz and the rest of your family happy with what you did?
Amaya: No
Mantu: Ok...Is Rama happy that you married him instead of Rachita?
Amaya: No
Mantu: Great...Is Rama's family giving you the respect of a daughter in law and accept you as their bahu?
Amaya: No
Mantu: Do you feel ashamed that Rachita is your step sister? Do you feel Rachita will start hating you and your family when she comes to know that she has a different father?
Amaya: Hell No
Mantu: Do you think accepting domestic violence is a solution to your problems and Sumithra aunty will keep this secret with her forever?
Amaya: I am not sure.
Mantu: If you father was alive today do you think he will be proud to see his open minded, bold and loving princess turn in to this pathetic bahu taking all nonsense in the name of love for family and sacrifice and not to forget family izzat??? Will you be able to meet his eyes and call him papa...?????
Amaya: ( Was in tears , quiet)
Mantu: Finally...Will you ever be able to love Rama like you loved me?
Amaya: Never
Mantu: So what was all your sacrifice for? I am sorry to say but You Were Not the One I Loved, Amaya Gupta. You are a stranger to me. I cannot really connect to you now. All these days I lived in pain, waiting for an answer from you. But today I am numb. My Amaya is no more. I can never get her back in her life. The lady who stands in front of me is not known to me. She is selfish, she is foolish and above all she is indifferent. All she cares about is becoming Mahaan in life. A Mahaan who could give nobody an ounce of happiness. Her life is of no use to anybody. So please leave me alone. I would like to live my life the way I wish. I don't want any interference from other on it. Also, now that I know Amaya loved me once and she is no more, I want to live the rest of my life here...in Benaras which holds all the memory of my Amaya..Amaya Mathur, my Princess.
I really don't want to see you or Rama anymore. Rama because he never had the spine to stand up for the love that he professed only in words and not in actions. Please leave and never come to meet me Amaya Gupta.
6 months later
Govind Sir: Mantu, we have a new trainee in office. I want you to train her personally. She was badly in need of a job and she seems intelligent too. Please introduce yourself beta...
Amaya: Amaya Mathur, Mr. Mantu. I hope to learn fast from you sir and I promise I will never leave you until I learn all that I need in my life, forever...(until my last breath)
(Needless to say Amaya had divorced Rama, had Sumithra and group taken on a week end tour of Benaras jail and back to her happy family of her mom, sisters and rest of chaubeys, who were now cured off their izzat plague). Dev babu lives or not , I am not aware as a viewer, so leaving that in air.
Anupamaa
Seher Hone Ko Hai
