Sooo, really not sure where this is going but hopefully it will be fun getting there đł Many many thanks to Sukhi for her input â¤ď¸ (I ended up rewriting the whole thing twice, finally deciding on English). Not for the younger members of the board, for now. Hope you all enjoy (and you can't complain about the length this time ok đ)
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"Ragini?"
Silence.
"Ragini."
He could hear the rustle of silk next to him in the darkness.
"What is it Nachiket?" Her voice was thick with fatigue.
"Were you sleeping?"
She huffed. "No, I was lying here with my eyes closed just for fun."
"I figured as much because when you're sleeping I can hear it loud and clear."
"Nachiket," she warned.
"I wanted to say sorry," he said finally, all traces of jest gone.
"For what?"
"For what happened this morning."
She froze in the dark, not believing that he could possibly be talking about that. It was all she had been able to been able to think about all day, through endless meetings, during the hours had ticked by in her cabin. How she had turned around and collided with the solid wall of his bare chest as he stepped out after his shower. How she had grabbed at him for balance and he had pulled her towards himself on instinct. How her hands had found themselves on his muscular torso. How his damp skin had felt against hers. How he had nicked himself under his chin while shaving. How she had wanted to kiss it better -
"Ragini? You remember na?"
"Hmm? Yes, I remember." She tried to keep her voice even. "Really it was my fault Nachiket, I should have watched where I was going."
Nachiket took a deep breath, still not sure if the gamble he was about to take would ruin the delicate relationship they had been painstakingly building this past month. What he did know was that he wouldn't be able to take another day like today. Having her in his arms this morning, her small frame leaning against him, the gentle pressure of her hands already burning his bare skin where they touched, her dark eyes looking into his and her lips parted ever so slightly...
It was not the first time they had encountered a potentially awkward situation, but he wasn't sure how much longer they could get away with blushing and stammering and avoiding each other the rest of the day if their marriage was to work. For the sake of their children, of course.
"It's bound to happen between us, considering the circumstances. Not your fault or mine...so," he paused. "I was thinking, what is there to be so worried about?"
"What do you mean?" She was unsure of where the conversation was going but was grateful for the cover of night. She clutched the sheet tighter to herself.
"Meaning, we're husband and wife again with this contract. If something did happen, what would be so wrong about that? Besides, it's not practical for us to avoid each other every time things get awkward."
Her heart thud painfully at his words, refusing to see the possibilities they offered as anything less than a double-edged sword. "But you want to marry Nivedita."
He had hoped she wouldn't utter that name - not here, in their room, in their bed. And though it was he who had brought that baggage into their marriage he felt resentment seize his chest at how casually she brought it up.
"What happens between us and in our family...that is none of her business," he retorted sharply.
"Nachiket," she sighed. "We're not kids anymore. In fact we have kids. We have to think about the consequences of our actions."
"I'm tired of thinking so much," he said before turning away to his side. "Can't we make things simple again?"
"But it's not simple."
"It can be simple, if we want it to be."
To that she had no response. His words echoed in her mind as the gentle patter of rain outside their window finally lulled her to sleep.
In the morning there was no mention of the conversation they had been brave enough to approach the night before. They went about their routine, dotted with the occasional hidden and not-so-hidden glance that would not be acted upon. The mornings stretched into days, and then nights during which she ignored the warm weight of his wayward arm around her waist. He was right of course, it was only natural that they would find themselves seeking the familiar comfort that they had denied themselves these past 18 years. But she felt a sense of relief at the fact that it never went any farther than these innocent gestures that were easily explained by proximity or even mild affection.
Because if they were ever to act on their attraction, she knew he would leave not just her bed but her heart cold and empty.
--
It was a Sunday morning when she padded into the living room with his tea, hair still wet from her recent shower and face scrubbed clean. As she handed him the cup, it occurred to him that he had dreamt about this exact moment in a hundred different variations over the years, and yet none of those dreams could do justice to her glowing countenance and the tease of her fragrant hair. She hastily tucked her pallu into her waist as she bent to fold the pile of newspapers littering the table. He willed his eyes not to follow over the rim of his cup, grateful for the distraction of the doorbell.
As he rose to answer she quickly disappeared back into their room, no doubt to make herself more presentable. The thought that he and he alone was privilege to see her so undone filled him with a warmth that had nothing to do with the hot liquid in his throat.
Nachiket answered the door, still half lost in thought of mornings past, and came face to face with the woman who was supposed to be his future.
"Neil!"
"Nivedita?"
"I just had to come over and see if you were ok."
He raised an eyebrow. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Oh Neil," she tittered as she pushed past him into the apartment. He clenched his jaw, anger building at the way she always managed to insinuate herself into their lives. His children were in the next room - had she no shame?
"I've been sending you messages for days, and even called a few times but didn't get any response." She gazed up at him from under the heavy mascara that brought out her eyelashes. "Someone has to look after you...what if something had happened?" Her voice dropped with her last question, and her hand began trailing its way up his arm in an apparent demonstration of her concern.
Ragini stopped as she made her way to the living room, unable to tear her eyes away from the way this woman was touching her husband. For a moment all she saw was red, that she and Nachiket would dare do such a thing in their home with their children likely to walk in at any moment.
The anger dulled the ache in her heart that never seemed to heal where he was concerned.
She watched him brush off her hand rather brusquely and speak to her in a low tone. Though she couldn't hear what was said his stance spoke for him, shoulders rigid and hands clenched. Nivedita was apparently not happy and turned to leave in a huff.
Ragini took a few moments to compose herself as he stood there still shaking his head. "Nachiket," she called, and he whipped around, eyes wide as if she had caught him eating the last piece of handvo in the middle of the night. "Come inside."
He followed her to their room, mentally bracing himself for a barrage of accusations she no doubt thought him guilty of. As he shut the door she turned to face him, mouth set in a thin straight line and eyes blazing. "What was that?"
"Ragini," he pleaded, trying to wrest control of the conversation before either of them said something they regretted. "Just hear me out."
She raised an eyebrow. "I'm listening."
He eyed her warily and paused just to make sure she meant it, earning another glare. "She came to me. I didn't want her here, not in our house." Not in my life, he wanted to add.
Ragini narrowed her eyes. "She may not understand what it means to be a mother, but if she ever does that again in front of my children I will make sure she knows a mother's wrath."
She had slowly inched closer to him as her finger jabbed in his direction and he couldn't help but be distracted by the mangalsutra that swung slowly over her chest as she moved.
She felt the heat of his eyes on her and the subsequent thrill it produced only served to incense her further. "I want her to know," she threatened with a bravado she didn't quite feel at the moment. He dragged his gaze back up to her face. "That while we're together no one has a right to you except our children and me."
His mouth turned up in a smirk despite her anger. "That's what I've been trying to tell you all along."
Ragini suddenly realized how close they were when she entertained thoughts of kissing the smirk off his infuriatingly handsome face.
Blood roared through his veins as her eyes fell to his lips, regardless of the fact that she had not even touched him yet. Her gaze held hints he was willing to spend hours deciphering, if only she would let him.
His words from the other night came back to her. If something did happen, what would be so wrong about that?
She glanced back up at him and the hunger in his eyes sent shivers down her spine. She thought about the lonely nights she was destined for after their marriage dissolved. She thought about the woman who was waiting for him once their house of cards came tumbling down.
And then she couldn't think any longer because he was kissing her.
His unexpectedly soft lips slanted over hers and he pulled her closer, hand trailing up her neck and molding her to him. Her body responded to him of its own volition, as if it had never forgotten this dance of theirs. He was relentless in staking his claim and was there to swallow the small whimper from the back of her throat, taking the opportunity her parted lips provided.
Ragini felt herself falling and clutched at his shirt, registering the sound of a button popping somewhere in the back of her mind. Nachiket chuckled against her mouth and this time she did kiss the smirk off his face, teeth gently nipping at his lower lip.
He growled at her impertinence and left her breathless as he moved his open mouth down the smooth column of her neck, still able to discern the fresh scent of soap on her skin. Her hands shook as she held him to her. It was too much and it was not enough.
"Nachiket," she breathed as his hair tickled her skin. "We have to stop."
Somehow her words filtered through the haze in his mind.
"Why," he gasped as they pulled apart, unwilling to let her go. He settled for hugging her and she came into his arms willingly. "And you don't dare say her name."
She rested her chin on his chest as if she belonged there. She did, his heart reminded him, and he pushed the looming contract date out of his mind. "That's my line."
"Well, I can think of other things to do with that mouth."
She blushed furiously at his words, as if she hadn't just been marking him with her teeth seconds ago. Perhaps she read his disbelief on his face because she reached up to gently massage the swollen skin on his bottom lip.
"Our family is outside waiting for us for breakfast."
He drew small lazy circles on her back, leaving goosebumps in his wake. "Tell them we're sleeping."
"After they've already seen us up and ready?"
"No one saw us."
"Sunny Tai did," she reminded him, and there was no need to mention her penchant for blurting out information at inopportune times.
"Fine," he kissed her forehead. "You go freshen up and I'll make sure they don't get suspicious."
Ragini made a face at his plan and he gently swatted her behind towards the washroom. "Go." She looked back at him once, face still flushed, eyes bright, and hair slightly disheveled.
It took all his willpower to drag himself away.
To be continued..
Cricket
Kumkum Bhagya
Tum Se Tum Tak
Sampoorna
Jhanak
