the story unfolds..

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

If I was writing Humsfars, this is how the story would go. please give your inputs..

Part I

Aarzoo is happy yet confused- " why Sahir sir in a hurry for nikaah- pehle proposal phir nikaah and whats the fareb thing that Zaki is talking about.

Intelligent girl, she decides to talk to Zaki, after all, woh "humare dost hai". Parallel Zaki and Sahir are conversing on "Sahir ki dhokebaazi",-

Zaki: Bhai aap aisa kyu kar rahe ho?

Sahir: Mai Samaira se tumhara nikaah karna ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta ho?

Zaki: Per kyu bhai?

Sahir: Zaki, Sayara / humara ghar sab uss deal per tika hua hai, aur Rahman sahab ki izzat ki baat hai

Zaki: Per bhai mai Samaira se pyaar nahi karta mai ...Aarzoo se pyaar karta ho-

Sahir: Tabhi toh tumhari zindagi se Aarzoo ko door karna zaroori hai.

Zaki: aur uske liye aap aarzoo ki feeling ke saath khel sakte hoo/ usse dhoka de sakte hoo

Saahir: (A brief silence/ clenched fist-) Haan mai kar sakta hoo.

Zaki- looks in the mirror, he sees Aarzoo, Staring at Saahir in disbelief.

Zaki: Jahaa aara

Saahir turns around and look at her.

aarzoo- Yeh sab sachch hai? Woh mohabaat/ mujhse nikaah/ saari baatein fareb

(my dialogue writing sucks)

Aapne aisa kyu kara- (she hits Saahir chest with clenched fist)- kyu? Itna bada Dhoka? hamari kya galti thi? Aap itne boray kaise ho sakte hai.( and more dialougue

Just then she sees her dupatta and the knots-

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

PART II

Aarzoo sees the knots in her Dupatta and walks out of the room, and out of the house.

she sitting on the bench- monologues-

Kyu allah yeh humare saath kyu? kya sabhi aadmi aise he hote hai? she again looks at her knots- open up the one she tied for saahir- Kabhi nahi Saahir sir.. ab aap toh kya hum kabhi kissi ko apna humsafar nahi banegay.

then she see other knots for her sister/ mother.. remembers her family.

Aarzo: nahi aaarzo yeh samay aansoo bahaane ka nahi hai, ammi myra zaara daadi sabke baar mai sochna hoga. agar ammi ko iss sable baare mai pata chala toh??

( In background saahir is constantly callling her.. saahir tis pacing in the room/says to himself "Kahaan chali gay ho tum aarzoo")

Zaki is driving around - looking for her.

Aarzoo: Looks at her phone, while Saahir is calling her, she's like no sir , ab humaari zindagi aapke koi jagah nahi hai. Pata nahi kyu hum in sub baton mai ulaz gaye. Allah ab aap he koi raasta dikhaaye

Tabhi a car stops-No not Zaki/ Not Saahir- its Mr Mehra, the guys who liked Aarzoo's work @ Saiyaaraa ( who aarzoo and Zaki meet to get the contract).

Mr Mehra: Tum Toh Saiyaara ki designer ho na.. jo duniya ko dikhano chahti thi ki ladkiya kissi se kum nahi hoti

Aarzoo looks up and says: Sayaara ki designer thi, ab nahi.

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

Part III

Mr Mehra: Toh kya ab nayi naukari ki talaash mai ho?

Aarzoo's quiet but nods.

Mr Mehra moves away and call up somebody, then he comes back and tells Aarzoo: Kal Company aake apna of offer letter le lena..tumhara kaam maine dekh rakha hai, we'll be happy to have you.

Aarzoo is surprised, but doesnt look happy.

Aarzoo: sure Sir, kitne baje?

Mr Mehra: 8 baje?

Aarzo: 8 baje?( she remembers this is Sahir's breakfast time)

Mr Mehra: Koi Problem?

Aarzoo: Nahi Sir, I'll be there

Mr Mehra Leaves, Aarzoo looks at the sky and thanks Allah.

Arzoo comes back to her outhouse- Zaki is sitting on the stairs waiting for her. He sees her-

Zaki: Jahaa aara

Aarzoo looks at him , ignore him and move ahead.

Zaki: Jahaa aaraa, please ek baar meri baat toh suno.

Aarzoo turns around and says: Zaki agar aap humara dost hai toh abhi hum se koi baat nahi kariye please

Zaki: Per.. and then hes quiet

Aarzo turn around to go and tabhi in front of her-- our hero, Saahir Azeem Chaudhary.

SAC: Where were you? Tum kahaa thi?

Aarzoo looks at him with hatred and moves ahead

SAc, grabs her hand, : Maine tumse kuch pocha hai aarzoo.

Aarzoo: Mera haath chodiye , she says it with so much of vehemence that SAC obeys

Aarzoo goes into her rooma nd locks it up

Once inside she starts crying- she looks at her phone and sees 58 Missed calls and 17 messages from Sahir

Aarzoo: Ab yeh sab kyu? Bahut jald hume yahaa se nikalna hoga

Aarzoo's phone rings- its her ammi

She wipers her tears- Says "Hello"

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raji

@Bujee09

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

🤗 take a hug darling👍🏼 ...and i so wish u continue writing this ..with some HAWT HAWT thoughts 😉😉

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aamnazuha

@aamnazuha

Explorer

Posted: 10 years ago

Congrats for writing such a beautiful story.do continue to write ,waiting for next part.

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

Part IV

Thank much for such inspirational words. Lots of love and hugs back:)

Now back to the story-

Arzoo picks up the phone- Hello Ammi

Ammi: Haan Arzoo, beta tu kaisi hai?

Arzoo: Ammi hum theek.

Ammi: Teri awaaz aise kyu laog rahi hai ki tu ro rahi hoo.

Arzoo: Nahi Ammi, Zukhaam lag gaya hai. Kahair chodo , aap bataye wapaas kab aa rahe ho?

Ammi: Parso aa rahe hai. Per tu chinta mat kar , hum khud niyamat( or whatever is the name) house pahoch jaaengay.

Aarzoo thinks to herself, no this can't happen- after all this she cannot stay here/ nor can her family.

Aarzo: nahi ammi , mai station aa jaaongi,

Ammi: Nahi beta uski koi jaroorat nahi hai

Arzoo: Bas ammi humne keh diya toh keh diya, hum aapko lene a jaengay. Chale ab phone rakhte hai

After ending the call Arzoo thinks to herself. Ab kya kare- 2 din mai kaha jaaye.. Mumbai mai toh hum kissiko nahi jaantay. Per ab iss ghar mai nahi reh sakte. Allah rasta dikhaao and sits on her bed.

at the same SAC, is pacing in the room, remembering Aarzoo's expressions of immense hatred. he says to himself , " i need to talk to her and rushes out of the room.

Next SAC, is knocking on the outhouse door

SAC: Aarzo, Darwaza kholo? Mujh se baat karo.. Aarzoo darwazaa kholo, tum aisa nahi kar sakti.

Aarzoo looks at the door , for a moment she feels weak.

Just then SAC says: darwaza kholo... mai keh raha hoo, tumhe meri baat manani he padegi.

Aarzoo's expressions change: Mai keh raha hoo, (she repeats to herself). Mai darwaza issliye kholo kyunkin Sahir Azeem chaudhary keh raha hai. Kya hoo mai unki hukum ki ghulaam, ya unke haathon ki kathputli.

Then with a sad smile,she add: Per sahi toh hai, maine he apney baare mai yeh soch banayi. apna istamaal hone diya. Kaise soch liya ki SAC mujh se pyaar karegay.

Aur maine kaise unse pyar kar liya...Shaayad meri kismat ...jisme aise he aadmi likhe hai- pehle sarfaraaz saahab jisne kabhi meri , meri ammi ki, humare zazbaatoon ki kabhi kadra nahi ki aur ab Saahir sir, ( she remembers the scene when Sahir pushed her on the floor)..

A tear trickled down her face, she could still hear the knock on the door.

Zaki sees Sahir kocking on the door, Alvira hears the noise too, she comes to outhouse-

Alvira (sees Sahir knocking furiously on the door, touches his shoulder).:Sahir kya kar rahe ho?Itni zor zor se kyu darwaraza knock kar rahe hoo- ghar tak awaaz aa rahi hai.

SAC: ( sudden realization , of where he is? What is he doing?):Kuch nahi ammi, woh aarzoo se kuch baat karni thi.

Alvira: (surprised expression). Kal baat kar lena , ab bahut raat ho gayi hai. Woh so chuki hoongi.

SAC(to himself): Soyi toh woh nahi hai aur shaayad so bhi nahi paaegi.

Alvira takes Sahir with him.

SAC: Back in his room, talk to his vulnerable self- Kya karo? Kaise Aarzoo se baat karo? usse Kya kaho?

Switch personality, comes his evil self, Kya Hua Sahir Azeem Chaudhary, Khud per yakin nahi hai tumhe, Aarzoo tum se pyaar karti hai, aur tumhe pata hai tumhe kya karna hai?Kal subah breakfast table per mulakaat hogi

Sahir closes his eyes: He sees Aarzoo and murmur to himself- I want you Aarzoo!

Edited by itsmeshingi - 10 years ago

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

Part V

Its's morning, Aazoo calls up Alvira and tells her that she has some work and is stepping out of the house and won't be there for Breakfast.

Alvira: Itni subah subah , kya kaam hai?

Aarzoo:Aunty, its something urgent aake bataoongi.

Aarzo leaves.

On the breakfast table, Saahir is looking for aarzoo. Alvira comes and sits beside him and starts eating.

Saahir: Ammi... Aarzoo nahi dikh rahi.

Ammi: Usse koi kaam tha isiliye bahaar gayi hai

Saahir( pauses for some time): Kab tak aaegi?

Ammi: Woh toh bataya nahi

Aazo goes to Mr Mehra's office, she meets a friendly lady ( the HR girl), who hands over the offer letter.

HR Lady: Tum agley week se start kar sakti hoo,

Aarzoo: Says thank you. ( thinks her family is coming back tomorrow)

HR Lady: do you need help with anything else?

Aarzoo: Nahi shukriya.. she turn around to leave but then stops and turns back-

Aarzoo: Kya aap humari makaan dhodhne mai madad kar sakti hai, humara abhi walla ghar yaha se bahut door hai

HR Lady:(thinks for a while) calls up someone and then says "Perfect"

HR Lady: Good news aarzoo, Company ka flat abhi khali hai, agar tum chaho toh 3 mahiney ke liye wahaa shift ho sakti ho.

Aarzoo is super happy: thank you so much, mai kab move ho sakti hoo?

HR Lady: Mai aaj usse clean karake ready karwa deti hoo, tum kal 10:00 baje tak move kar sakti ho.

Aarzoo: thank you so much. Thank you

She leaves the office and comes back to Niyamat house.

While she's entering the house she sees Sahir, looking at her.

Sahir rushes to her; Tum kahaa thi?

Aarzoo ignores him.

Sahir pull Aarzoo towards him- ( with soft expression)- Aisa mat karo Aarzoo? mai..

Aarzoo(pulls away): aur aapne jo kiya? mere zazbaatoon ka majaak udaya/ mera yakeen tod diya--

(She realizes she doesn't have to explain anything to him). turn around and calls out to Alvira, Alvira Aunty.

Sahir pulls her towards him with her back on the wall-touches her cheek with his soft fingers, Aarzoo mai tumse mohab...

Aarzoo: Bas ab kuch nahi and runs towards Alvira's room

Sahir follows-

Aarzoo: alvira aunty.

Alvira is not in the room, sahir enters the room and closes the door

Sahir: Tumhe meri baat sunanani padegi-

Aarzoo Zaki tumse pyaar karta hai( Aarzoo is shocked) , usne Samira se nikah karne se mana kar diya tha , woh sirf tumse nikaah karna chahta hai- aur rehman saahab ne deal poori karne ke liye Zaki Samira ki shaddi ki Shart rakhi. Niyamat house, Saiyaara sab girvi hai iss deal ke liye.

aarzoo- is silent and then says- toh apni Deal bachane ke liye aapne humari feelings ka sauda kar diya

Zaki humse nikaah karna chahta hai per kya aapne jaana chaha ki hum kya chahte hai?

Hum zaki se pyaar nahi kartey, aur unke saath kabhi nikaah nahi kartey , kabhi nahi- aur uske liye aapko humare saath pyaar ka naatak karne ki koi jaroorat nahi thi-

Sahir is silent , he grabs Aarzoo's hand: aarzoo jo maine kiya woh bahut bora tha aur mai bahut sharminda ho. Per mujhe nahi lagta ki woh... pyaar ka "naatak" tha. Mai tum se sach mai pyaar..

aarzoo gets up: Please Sahir sahab ab kuch mat kahiye.

There's a knock on the door, Aarzoo runs and open the door.It's alvira

Alvira: Kya ho raha hai?

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raji

@Bujee09

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 10 years ago

Originally posted by: itsmeshingi
Part V

Its's morning, Aazoo calls up Alvira and tells her that she has some work and is stepping out of the house and won't be there for Breakfast.
Alvira: Itni subah subah , kya kaam hai?
Aarzoo:Aunty, its something urgent aake bataoongi.

Aarzo leaves.
On the breakfast table, Saahir is looking for aarzoo. Alvira comes and sits beside him and starts eating.
Saahir: Ammi... Aarzoo nahi dikh rahi.
Ammi: Usse koi kaam tha isiliye bahaar gayi hai
Saahir( pauses for some time): Kab tak aaegi?
Ammi: Woh toh bataya nahi

Aazo goes to Mr Mehra's office, she meets a friendly lady ( the HR girl), who hands over the offer letter.
HR Lady: Tum agley week se start kar sakti hoo,
Aarzoo: Says thank you. ( thinks her family is coming back tomorrow)
HR Lady: do you need help with anything else?
Aarzoo: Nahi shukriya.. she turn around to leave but then stops and turns back-
Aarzoo: Kya aap humari makaan dhodhne mai madad kar sakti hai, humara abhi walla ghar yaha se bahut door hai
HR Lady:(thinks for a while) calls up someone and then says "Perfect"
HR Lady: Good news aarzoo, Company ka flat abhi khali hai, agar tum chaho toh 3 mahiney ke liye wahaa shift ho sakti ho.
Aarzoo is super happy: thank you so much, mai kab move ho sakti hoo?
HR Lady: Mai aaj usse clean karake ready karwa deti hoo, tum kal 10:00 baje tak move kar sakti ho.
Aarzoo: thank you so much. Thank you

She leaves the office and comes back to Niyamat house.

While she's entering the house she sees Sahir, looking at her.
Sahir rushes to her; Tum kahaa thi?
Aarzoo ignores him.
Sahir pull Aarzoo towards him- ( with soft expression)- Aisa mat karo Aarzoo? mai..
Aarzoo(pulls away): aur aapne jo kiya? mere zazbaatoon ka majaak udaya/ mera yakeen tod diya--
(She realizes she doesn't have to explain anything to him). turn around and calls out to Alvira, Alvira Aunty.

Sahir pulls her towards him with her back on the wall-touches her cheek with his soft fingers, Aarzoo mai tumse mohab...
Aarzoo: Bas ab kuch nahi and runs towards Alvira's room
Sahir follows-

Aarzoo: alvira aunty.
Alvira is not in the room, sahir enters the room and closes the door

Sahir: Tumhe meri baat sunanani padegi-
Aarzoo Zaki tumse pyaar karta hai( Aarzoo is shocked) , usne Samira se nikah karne se mana kar diya tha , woh sirf tumse nikaah karna chahta hai- aur rehman saahab ne deal poori karne ke liye Zaki Samira ki shaddi ki Shart rakhi. Niyamat house, Saiyaara sab girvi hai iss deal ke liye.

aarzoo- is silent and then says- toh apni Deal bachane ke liye aapne humari feelings ka sauda kar diya
Zaki humse nikaah karna chahta hai per kya aapne jaana chaha ki hum kya chahte hai?

Hum zaki se pyaar nahi kartey, aur unke saath kabhi nikaah nahi kartey , kabhi nahi- aur uske liye aapko humare saath pyaar ka naatak karne ki koi jaroorat nahi thi-

Sahir is silent , he grabs Aarzoo's hand: aarzoo jo maine kiya woh bahut bora tha aur mai bahut sharminda ho. Per mujhe nahi lagta ki woh... pyaar ka "naatak" tha. Mai tum se sach mai pyaar..

aarzoo gets up: Please Sahir sahab ab kuch mat kahiye.

There's a knock on the door, Aarzoo runs and open the door.It's alvira

Alvira: Kya ho raha hai?

👍🏼 keep writing ...am enjoying your work 👏

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itsmeshingi

@itsmeshingi

Beginner

Posted: 10 years ago

Part VI

Alvira: Yeh sab kya ho raha hai?

Aarzoo: aunty hum aapko he dhoondh rahe thay- Ammi aur kal aa rahe hai socha aapko bata day.

Alvira: Arey achcha hai, waise mujhe tumhari ammi se bahut si baatein karni hai( she looks at Sahir, who has his eyes fixed on Aarzoo)

Aarzoo: Achcha aunty chalte hai

Sahir looks at her and move his hand( exted his arm) to try to stop her. aarzoo leaves.

Alvira turns around and asks Sahir- Kamra lock kyu tha Sahir?

Sahir: stays Quiet, looks on the floor - says "pata nahi" and walks away

Alvira is left staring.

In the living room Aarzoo meets Zaki.

Zaki :Jahaa aaaraa

Aarzoo ignores go ahead but then turns back to him

Aarzoo: Zaki, aap humare bahut achche dost hai, aapne humari hamesha humari madad ki hai. Aapki wajah se he sachai umare samne ayi hai aur hum iske liye hamesha aapke ehsaan mand hogay.

Per zaki Rishton ka tana bana aisa hota hai, ki ek rishtay mai lagi choat aur kaafi rishton ko zakhami ker de deti hai.

She decides to move but come back and say- Zaki ek dost ki hasiyat se keh rahe hai- Samaira se nikaah karna aapka faisla hai per ek bachche ko baap ka saaya milna he chahiye. Pita ki kami kya hoti hai, yeh hum se behtar kaun jaanta hai.

She touches Zakis shoulder softly and leaves.

Tabhi Kurti Appa and Anam come into the scene.

KA: Aaj mai bahut khush ho.. Sahir sahir

Everybody gathers,

Alvira: Kya hua KA aap shor kyu macha rahe hoo

KA: Lo Begum, Shor? Yeh toh meri khushi hai-

Anam: Dr. khurana ka phone that woh kab se tumhara (looking towards Sahir) phone try kar rahe hai per, tum phone utha he nahi rahe ho.(Sahir- looks at his phone). NY hospital se saari formalities poori ho gayi hai, Zeenat ko ab kissi bhi waqt NY leja sakte hai.

KA: Looks at Sahir, hai na ek dum badhi wali khush khabari and she starts dancing. Tabhi KA looks at Lost Aarzoo.

KA: kya hua aarzoo? Zeenat ko nahi jaanti- Humari Choti begun , Sahir ki biwi-