Chapter 1
I sat on the bed and glanced at my wedding picture kept on the side table, a smirk escaped my lips, it had been six months but it seemed just yesterday that I had felt something flutter inside my heart on hearing her sing. I still remember clearly it was a dark cloudy evening, there was a power cut and as usual I was cursing Hari prakash under my breath for taking so long to resume power. I went up to the balcony to gain some fresh air but as soon as I stepped out my ears caught something, something very sweet and melodious. I gazed at the direction from where the sound was coming, it was the building adjacent to Raizada mansion where our employees resided. It was still dark and it had begun to drizzle but I could make out a petite figure singing and dancing with her arms spread out wide on the terrace of that building
"roz shaam aati thi magar aisi na thi
Roz roz ghatta chaati thi magar aisi na thi
Ye aaj meri zindagi mein kaun aa gaya "
Leaving me totally mesmerized by her singing, her soothing voice touched my heart and a faint smile displayed on my face. I didn't know for how long I was standing watching her till I felt someone's hand on my shoulder, I turned around and found naani before me raising her brow and questioning me, I immediately dropped my gaze and began looking here and there. She continued to stare at me, soon power resumed and she too glanced at the terrace, then smiled and informed," she is our new accountant's daughter." I raised my head at once and turned in that direction, she had stopped singing and now was pulling down the clothes hanging on the nylon wire hurriedly, preventing them from getting wet. A beautiful voice matched an equally beautiful face, how couldn't it? A soulful voice could make any ordinary person look extraordinary. This time naani cleared her throat to make me realize that she was still around, I pursed my lips and walked back to my room before she could ask anything further, unaware that she could hear and understand even my unspoken words.
That night was different, really different from the ones I had spent in the past, that night was calm and serene. A person like me who never slept without drowning himself into alcohol, slept that night without touching even a drop of it, instead was drowned in her harmonious voice. The lyrics of her song resounded in my ears throughout the night, yeah someone had entered in my life as well.
As if it was destined, I spotted her the next day again, naani had asked me to drop her to the temple, I was waiting for her in the car and while adjusting the rear view mirror I saw her buying veggies from an old vegetable seller. I smiled inwardly on seeing the way she was bargaining with the old man for a small bunch of coriander leaves, all of a sudden I heard a knock at the window of the car, Aakash my younger brother smirked and said," bhai, if you are through ogling her then please take naani to the temple ." When did she come and sit next to me, I didn't know, I glanced at her grinning face from the corner of my eye and began driving, the whole drive was silent but I had a nagging feeling that she was curious to initiate that topic which I had managed to avoid for years but alas not long enough, thanks to one more encounter with her.
This time I was sipping on the hot black coffee in my balcony and my ears got hold of the heart soothing bhajan that she was singing. My eyes moved around frantically in search for her, minutes later she came out in the terrace to water the plants, leaving me rooted to the place where I was standing. Admiring her calm face which glowed under the sunlight, her long black hair flew in the air and blocked my view. Soon her mother called her in, disappointed to see her leaving I too turned around and found naani yet again standing in front of me. I kicked myself mentally on getting caught once again, why did she have to be around whenever I looked at her? I walked passed her," nice girl." She said softly, I stopped in my tracks but didn't reply. With my back still facing her, she asked," chotte, if you like her then should I send a proposal to her parents?" I glanced over my shoulder and left without protesting.
Things would move so speedily I hadn't expected, her parents were called within a week, they were pleasantly shocked at the proposed alliance, her father wouldn't disagree I knew from the beginning, the greed in his eyes had not gone unnoticed by me but for me the most important issue was to know her will because no girl dreams to marry a gangster! I didn't want her to accept the proposal under any kind of pressure, so with naani's permission we both got a chance to talk in private. For the first time she was standing so close to me, fidgeting with the end of her dupatta, if she was nervous then I couldn't complain because even I was a bundle of nerves. There was long and deep silence in the balcony where we both were present. I swallowed the lump in my throat and said," some days back I saw you there...in the rain." pointing towards her terrace, her eyes travelled in that direction, she nodded silently," you were singing." I informed, her eyes shot up in surprise, to which I gave out a weak smile, she lowered her head once again," so, do you have any problem with this proposal?" I asked, she took a moment to reply and within that moment my heart skipped a beat," no, I don't have a problem." Was her reply which made me let out a sigh of relief on knowing that she wasn't against this alliance," is everything happening as per your wish and happiness?" I asked one more time to dispel my doubts, she shook her head in agreement," do you want to ask me anything?" I inquired, she said," no". I shrugged my shoulders and said," fine then lets go" she walked in quietly and I followed her behind still gazing at her terrace wondering that the distance from her terrace to my balcony would get covered so soon I had never imagined.
The wedding date which was a fortnight later was fixed, even though our horoscopes didn't match well still, naani seeing my eagerness in somebody for the first time wanted to go ahead with this proposal. She suggested some puja for our better compatibility. Soon Raizada mansion was buzzing with excitement , an air of thrill and enthusiasm which was long missing spread all over the house. The one person who was on cloud nine was my sister in law, payal, how could she leave this golden opportunity of indulging herself into shopping, she had a naughty grin on her face as her eyes shifted from aakash to naani," I was thinking why not today take bhabhi out for shopping? Even Arnav bhai can accompany us." She knew I disliked shopping but wouldn't refuse if naani asked me to go out and that's exactly what happened, Aakash and I had to tag along with both the girls for that boring task. Payal's going hysterical on entering the showroom was expected but I was pleasantly surprised to see her thrilled too as she tried out different outfits for her wedding. Payal draped one sari after the other around her and in between asked for my opinion too," bhai, have a look. How's this one?" I hesitantly looked at her, she was fair and pretty, all the colors suited her especially red, it made her skin glow all the more," all are nice, but I think that red one, looks the best." I pointed towards the red one which had a simple golden border, her eyes travelled in that direction, she gazed at herself one more time in the mirror then said softly," but I prefer this yellow sari." I smiled and shrugged my shoulders, if she wished to buy that yellow sari with heavy golden work done all over then it was absolutely fine with me, after all at the end of the day she had to wear it, so her choice mattered the most what if ours didn't match in the process. After what seemed ages we all stepped out of that garments showroom only to enter a jewellary shop, naani had strictly instructed to buy along with other necessary ornaments a mangal sutra as well. I was grinning inwardly when I saw her trying out those heavy necklaces and earrings, sometimes I felt she was unnecessarily crushing herself under the weight of those ornaments but what I forgot, was that she was shopping for her wedding, the most important day in a girl's life when she wants to look the best. Payal called me out to select a mangal sutra amongst the various pieces that were displayed. I glanced over them and thought she had already bought heavy wedding jewellery so a nice and simple mangal sutra would go well with her diamond studded necklace. I picked one with black beads and a small locket, she appeared a little disappointed with my choice, at least that's what I felt so suggested," I have absolute no knowledge about all this so go ahead and choose whichever you find suitable." And I honestly didn't have a clue as to what would look good on her so she might as well buy what she was comfortable in. She lowered her head and replied," no, this one is fine." I smiled and paid the bills, Aakash elbowed me at the cash counter and teased," bhai, this is just the start, you are not even married and see the bill. Don't tell me later that I didn't warn you." people marry once in their life so they have every right to splurge on themselves and I was more than happy to pay her bills. I slapped his back and said proudly," obviously she'll have a stylish taste, after all she is Arnav Singh Raizada's would be wife" Aakash smiled back on hearing it. While driving back home my gaze fell on her, she was sitting behind me admiring the bangles she had bought, there was a certain childlike enthusiasm in her throughout the time we were shopping. The sparkle of gold bangles reached her eyes which I noticed to see through the rear view mirror, she caught me looking at her, she shyly dropped her gaze. It gave me enormous happiness to shower her with those wedding gifts.
The next day we had to get up early, naani had organized the required puja for us at the temple. Never a firm believer of God and hardly participated in any religious rituals but this time even I wished that everything went off well. After carrying out a long havan we both stood at the edge of the stairs. I joined both my hands to acknowledge and respect the presence of all the people who had turned up in large numbers to bless us and seek a glimpse of my soon to be wife. I stepped down two steps then stopped and looked to my left, she wasn't there, she hadn't moved an inch, I smiled and offered my hand, she seemed awestruck to witness the love which displayed across the faces of the people who had gathered and the way they were cheering for us. She glanced at my open palm and held it slowly, nervousness gave way to confidence as she stepped down with me and her eyes glowed with this new found adulation. On reaching the car I let her hand go and was walking towards the driver's seat when I heard her say," it seems strange and at the same time it feels powerful to see so many people at your mercy. Isn't it?" I knotted my brows in disappointment, people here loved and respected me. For them I was like their god father who protected them and worked for their welfare. I wasn't a gangster for them who they feared. I turned around and corrected," I don't rule over these people. They are like family to me. They are my strength. Their joined hands and bowed heads don't suggest their helplessness" She lowered her head in guilt for perceiving their love for me as their fear. The drive back home was a silent one, I felt bad for being rude to her, especially as she was not accustomed to all this so misinterpreted the whole thing, I wanted to speak to her more as also it was our last meeting, naani had forbidden us to see each other till the wedding day but sadly nothing came out of my mouth.
At last the wedding day arrived and I was going through a gamut of emotions, a part of me was excited to spend the rest of the life with someone who I loved, while a part of me was nervous and questioned myself as to whether I was capable enough to discharge such a big responsibility? Would I make her happy? Would I be able to fulfill her dreams? I took a deep sigh and adjusted the stole around my neck then straightened my wedding outfit and glanced myself in the mirror for the last time. I looked around my room, a lot had changed in it within a few days and a lot more would change in a couple of hours. I smiled as my gaze fell on the hanging wind chime at the entrance, it was her idea, she enjoyed their sweet sound and wished to have it in the room when asked by payal as to how she desired to redecorate the room. I went near the wind chime and touched it lightly, its musical sound reminded me of her singing, a music lover like her could never miss out on such a beautiful thing. My eyes travelled across the room from the new cupboard which had her clothes to the huge mirror placed for her to get ready. A smile came to my lips on seeing that mirror which reflected a big picture of her that I had put up on the wall. Everything seemed like a dream, beautiful and perfect. Finally I was settling down, finally I had someone to share my life with, finally there was someone made just for me.
With bated breath I descended down the stairs, stepping toward my new world. The guests had arrived and everything as planned had been set up for the occasion. I scanned through the crowd for naani,Aakash and Payal, they weren't around. Something scared me from within, I slowly walked towards naani's room and entered. Shashi appeared shell shocked while his wife was weeping profusely, I narrowed my eyes in confusion, what was happening? Why was the atmosphere so heavy and sad? Naani was sitting on the bed with her head down," what's the matter naani? Why is everybody so tensed?" I asked, she lifted her head up, her eyes were teary which worried me all the more, this time I raised my voice and questioned," will someone tell me, what the HELL in happening here ?" startled with my high pitched voice, payal slowly walked toward me and handed a piece of paper to me, I read it quickly which said," I cannot marry you. I love someone else and will marry only him. I am going away." What was this some joke? I read the paper again and again, she was in love with some other guy and had eloped with him? How was it possible? I had asked her clearly whether she was happy with this marriage or not, whether everything was happening as per her will, she had said yes then now how could she back out? How could she do this to me? How could she betray me like this? I raised my head and looked around furiously at everybody then crushed the paper in my fist and threw it away as blood rose to my eyes.
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I tightened my grip around the glass of whiskey that I was holding, in an attempt to suppress my anger but it wasn't working, how could it? After crushing me and my dreams that fateful night, she had the audacity to enter my life one more time? What she did six months back wasn't enough that today again she had to come back? I clenched my jaws hard and yelled at the top of my voice," SHEETAL " the glass in my hand crushed into pieces just as my hopes and happiness had crushed that night. She came running to the room and took my bleeding hand in hers, with pain and concerned filled eyes she asked," Arnav ji, what have you done?" I looked back at her blankly.
I, Arnav Singh Raizada and this was my story which ended before it could get started, which remained unfinished and left me incomplete.
Thanks for reading
Rose
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