FF: The Beautiful and the Condemned (Completed) - Page 67

Parvati was not allowed to lift a finger for the last two weeks. She had been put on bed rest, not by the doctors, but by Rudra. After she had come home and gotten some much needed rest, she was feeling quite better. However, her husband wouldn't hear it. Until the scars and wounds were completely healed, Paro was not allowed to do anything. She tried arguing, but that proved useless once Rudra brought Aman and Pia over. Pia lectured her for at least an hour on her health, using kind words, harsh truths, and open threats to get her point across. Aman didn't say much, but when he did he used the biggest arsenal in his book: Abhi. He told Paro that if she didn't do what they said, he wouldn't let Abhi come visit her. Paro, who treated Abhi like her own son, submitted.

Rudra managed to take the first week off from work. He stated that there was an important family emergency with his wife, and Geetanjali ma'am was insistent that he take the week off. In that time, Rudra spent the entire day with Paro, making sure she was resting as per his instructions. Her wounds had to be redressed more frequently and she had to take more medicine. When they went back to the hospital for a followup, Doctor Kapoor stated that Parvati was doing very well and that there was no need to worry. Rudra would worry nevertheless. However, he could see that she was healing fairly well, and the pink tint had returned in her cheeks.

After much fighting, he let her walk around the house so she could get the strength back in her legs. However, Rudra trailed behind her every time she stood up, in fear that she would fall over. She stumbled a little, but never fell flat. Her progress was much better than he had expected. Paro complained quite a bit that she was bored and wanted to go outside, but he wouldn't allow it. After Tejawat's threat, the outside world was dangerous for her. He didn't want her going outside either until she had fully recovered. So for now, she would just have to wait.

Even though he wasn't working on security detail that week, Rudra was attending to other business. He busied himself by trying to locate Tejawat and his men. Knowing the thakur well, he knew that he would still be within city limits to keep a close watch on his and Paro. However the question was where exactly was he? Rudra wanted the paranoia and fear of losing everything to end, and for that to happen he had to deal with Tejawat personally. However, it wasn't easy because to confront the man he had to find him, which Rudra was having great difficulty in. Every time there was some sort of lead on thakur-sa's whereabouts, it would lead to a dead end or Rudra just barely missing him. This frustrated him to a new extent. His determination didn't falter. Rudra just worked harder at trying to find Tejawat. Once he did, there would be no power on Earth to stop him from killing the man who dared to snatch everything away from him.

After his week of time off ended, Rudra had asked Pia to come over and stay with Paro. He had given her very detailed instructions on how to take care of her. Pia knew how to do it all, but she allowed him to tell her what to do for his peace of mind. She had seen Rudra struggle with coming to terms with everything that had happened. Assurance and support was what he needed right now, and Pia was willing to be there for him. She and Aman were the main reason Rudra didn't spiral into a hole of guilt and self-blame. Pia was no better than Rudra when it came to Parvati's health. Many days, Paro would try and convince Pia take her outside, even if it was just for a few minutes. Pia already knew that Rudra wouldn't want Paro going outside because of everything that had happened, so whenever she came over she brought Abhimanyu along with her. This would always bring a smile on Paro's face and make her forget about going outside.

Pia had opened up to Parvati and told her how scared she was when Aman had told her what happened. She told her she remembered how Aman came in with his clothes stained red. She was numb thinking that all that blood had come from her dear friend. Pia had prayed to Bholenath, asking Him to let Paro be okay. She didn't want to be selfish, but she didn't want to lose any more of her family. The very thought of Pia being so distressed brought tears to Paro's eyes. Pia quickly stated that she was glad that nothing happened to her, and that everything would be okay now. She wiped the tears from her companion's face and tried to bring a smile back, knowing that stressing her out wouldn't be very good. Not to mention Rudra would bury her alive if he saw a single tear fell from Paro's face because of her!

Parvati noticed Rudra's distant behavior in the two weeks following the incident. He wasn't as close to her as before. She understood that he wouldn't get close to her physically' until she was fully better. Whenever he came near her, he was hesitant to touch her, as if she were a glass doll that would break upon his caress. His movements were tense, and even at night he wouldn't pull her in his arms to sleep like they had done almost every night for the last year. Rudra's smile lacked the genuine joy that normally reached his eyes. Instead, they flickered with hesitation and sadness. It was as if the walls that had crumbled in him because of her were being rebuilt to push her away. Parvati knew the reason behind his actions, and hoped that it would disappear with time. But it didn't. After three weeks of this she couldn't take it anymore.

It was night and the two of them were preparing for bed. Rudra had helped her redress her wounds and change into her night clothes: a yellow lengha, white choli, and blue dupatta. She sat on the bed and brushed out her hair while Rudra changed into his light blue kurta and black pants. He came and sat down next to her, took the brush from her hand, and handed her her medicine. As she obediently took it, her eyes glanced in his direction to see that he was staring at her bandaged arms. He also caught a glimpse of the tight bandage on her stomach, peeking out from the dupatta. The solemness returned to his face, even as he tried to hide it. As he was about to get up, Paro grabbed his wrist, halting him in his tracks. This sadness between them was hurting them both, and she was going to put an end to it. Right here. Right now.

Rudra looked back in her direction, concern flashing in his eyes. He sat down at the edge of the bed next to her once he saw her eyes water. Normally, he would have cupped her face and wiped those tears away, but this time he didn't. He simply sat there, trying hard to understand the meaning of the silent pain that she was reflecting.

In the softest, most understanding tone, Parvati said, "It's not your fault, Rudra."

He stiffened and looked down at his hands on his lap, away from her gaze.

Knowing that he was still listening, she smiled sadly and continued, "What happened to me isn't your fault. I know that you have been blaming yourself ever since I've come home from the hospital. That's why you've maintained this distance from me, right?"

Rudra guiltily glanced at her and nodded like a child.

"This is not your fault. Please, don't blame yourself. This distance between us isn't helping anyone. It's only hurting us. By doing this, you're practically letting Tejawat win. I know...I know that you wish you could've saved me from him earlier, but you did before it was too late. You saved my life...Rudra, I heard what you had said in the hospital...about how you thought that I should leave you."

He looked at her, stunned that she had heard him.

"I knew what would happen if Tejawat found us, and yet I was still willing to run away with you. Do you know why?" she cupped his face in her hands. "Because I love you...more than anything else in this world. And I would rather live this life with you knowing that I could die any minute, than live this life without you."

Rudra, who had been listening silently this entire time, held the hands that were holding his face so tenderly and said, "I really thought I had lost you. When I saw all that blood, I felt my heart bleed. The thought of losing another person I care about, was enough to make me go insane. My soul would've died with you Paro. I would've just lived the rest of my life like I had before. No mercy. No remorse. No feelings. Just a numb being. Because if there's anything I've learned in the last year, it's that agar Paro nahin toh Rudra nahin."

"Rudra I-."

"I feel like I failed as a husband. I couldn't protect you from Tejawat. You were dying in my arms. I almost lost you, Paro...I...I almost..."

Parvati could feel his hot tears against the palms of her hands. She had never seen Rudra so broken, not even when he had spoken about his parents. He had really been terrified of losing her. It made her heart swell with pride knowing that she had such a caring and loving husband. Right now, he was still afraid of losing her, and she had to explain to him that she was not going anywhere. No one would be able to separate them.

She moved closer to him so he was looking directly at her and said, "You didn't lose me, Rudra. I'm right here. I always have been, and I always will. Right here, by your side, just like we vowed at our wedding, remember?"

Rudra's breath hitched as Paro leaned in. Her lips were barely brushing against his, but she was close enough to where he could feel her breath. He could feel that desires he had locked away in a jar begin to tremble within him, begging to be released. Paro glanced up and saw the glazed look in his eyes, and she immediately knew what was going on in his mind.

In a soft, sensuous whisper, she spoke, "Main. Tu. Hamesha." Her lips met his.

The kisses were gentle and feather-like at first, but once Rudra got a taste he needed more. He had been trying to stop himself because he knew she hadn't fully recovered. But if she had taken the initiative, it must've meant that she knew she was feeling better. And who was he to stop his wife from loving him? He sure as hell wasn't going to! Especially after controlling himself for the last three weeks. However, he knew he had to be gentle. No matter how hard he wanted to ravish her, Paro's safety and health came before everything else.

Parvati felt herself being guided down on the bed. Not once had she opened her eyes nor did her lips leave his; this caused her other senses to heightened. She could feel the blazing trail that he left as his hands caressed every curve of her body. He froze as his hand grazed upon the bandage on her stomach. Rudra pulled back slightly and looked at Paro dazed. She opened her eyes and stared at him, confused as to why he had stopped. He gave a gentle smile before tugging the dupatta off of her body. He leaned down and kissed the exposed bandages softly. Then he kissed the ones on her arms, then on her neck, then the small one on her forehead. This gesture warmed Paro's heart. It was this gesture that showed how he was trying to heal her with his love. Those small details, those tender touches, they were the reason Paro never needed Rudra to explain his feelings. His actions always spoke louder than words. And tonight, as he claimed her once more, Rudra's actions spelled out what was in his heart: agar Paro nahin toh Rudra nahin.

~

Three months later...

"No," Rudra stated firmly.

"But at least-," Paro whined.

"I said no Paro," Rudra repeated for the tenth time.

"But I have to go today."

"Tejawat is still in the city. His men are still probably watching us, and you want to go outside with a target on your back?! I don't think so."

They had been arguing in their bedroom since this morning and were now facing each other. Rudra couldn't believe Paro was asking for such a thing. Here he was, worrying about their safety for the last three months, and today she wants to go to the mandir?! He had barely let her go out since Tejawat had attacked her. Rudra rarely allowed her to go visit Pia because he didn't want her and Aman to become a target. They had a six month old son to think about. He was constantly vigilant about everything around them. Last week, when he had to take Paro for her final checkup, he guarded her like she was the princess of India. She had to take every step as though she was about to walk on fire. Every three steps he'd stop her and check their surroundings before letting her move ahead. He could see Paro was getting irritated by it, but he didn't care. After what had happened, he wasn't going to take any chances in protecting his wife.

Well, Parvati Rudra Pratap Ranawat wasn't going to take no' for an answer, especially not today. She had been arguing, pleading, and threatening him for the last two hours, but Rudra didn't budge. She understood why he was being so protective, but she hoped that he would make an exception, at least for today. It was just the mandir, and she didn't want to stay there the whole day. Paro just wanted to go for a few minutes. She didn't care if he came inside, knowing that Rudra wasn't one for prayers. He should at least accompany her today. Then it struck her. Did he not remember what today was? In all the tension and stress he had taken up was it possible that he had forgotten?

Her eyes softened, "It's important that I go today. Please don't deny me this."

"Why are you so adamant on going today?" he asked in a voice that was slightly softer but still firm.

"...You don't remember do you?"

He raised his eyebrow in confusion.

"...It's my birthday."

Where were Aman and Pia to slap him in the back of the head when he needed it?! Rudra's eyes widened at the realization that today was, in fact, Paro's birthday. He had completely forgotten. With everything with Tejawat, it must've slipped his mind. He was mentally cursing himself over and over again. That was no excuse. Paro was important to him, so how could he excuse the fact that he had forgotten the day the love of his life was born? There was no excuse. It was unacceptable. Shame and disappointment filled him as he tore his gaze from her.

"I know you forgot, and it's okay," Paro said. "But I really don't want you to deny me this. I went to the mandir last year too, and I hope you understand now why I am asking to go again."

Rudra moved forward and cupped her face, "I'm sorry. I can't believe I forgot."

"It's okay, but will you take me to the mandir. Please?"

"...Fine. But you will have to stay by my side the entire time. I don't want you away from me, not even for a second. Is that understood?"

Paro nodded, "Come. Let's go."

"Wait."

She found that he hadn't removed his hands from her face. Paro looked up at him and found a soft smile appearing on his lips.

He leaned down and kissed her forehead, "Happy Birthday, Paro."

~

After his parent's demise, Rudra had only stepped into a mandir twice. Both times were for one person: Parvati. The first time was when he was asking Bholenath to bring her back and the second was when he married her. Since then, he never stepped in a mandir. Rudra didn't feel guilty anymore because he did feel that he had reformed into a better man. He just didn't find it necessary to pray. He believed that people only prayed when they wanted something, and Rudra didn't want anything. Everything he wanted was molded together in one being, who was standing next to him at the bottom of the steps, taking her sandals off. Now that he had her, he didn't want anything else.

However, today, he climbed the white stone steps up to the mandir. Rudra had stated he didn't want Paro out of his sight for a minute, and he meant it. He also hoped that it would somehow make up for the fact that he had forgotten her birthday. His eyes scanned the surroundings as they reached the top step. When his gaze fell upon the Bholenath statue, Rudra instantly calmed. Tejawat wouldn't attack them in here. The man had some boundaries. Rudra also knew that Parvati was Bholenath's devotee, and He would protect those that were devoted to him. Therefore, he had nothing to fear for the moment.

"What have you come to ask for?" Rudra asked curiously.

She let out a small laugh and said, "Who says I want anything?"

"Then why are we here?"

"Sometimes people don't have to want anything. Sometimes we could come here to thank Him for everything he has given us."

Parvati eagerly walked forward with Rudra by her side. The pundit was standing and chanting mantras when the couple stood before Him. Paro realized that this was the first time she and Rudra had come together, as a married couple, and hoped that Bholenath would bless them with a bright future. She closed her eyes, folded her hands, and prayed silently. Rudra watched her while she did this. Her words replayed in his mind. He took note of the state of absolute peace in her disposition. She was clearly conversing with Bholenath, about what, he didn't know. But the little smile that crept up on her face was soon reflected on his.

Rudra turned to look at the deity before him. The all-powerful and all-knowing. The destroyer and the creator. It was because of Him that he was able to stand here next to Paro, who he was on the verge of losing to Him three months ago. He knew that Bholenath wouldn't deny him the one thing he had ever truly wanted with his heart. Despite his tainted past, He saw with truth written in his heart. Overwhelmed with this reality, Rudra, too, closed his eyes and folded his hands.

When she opened her eyes, Parvati was surprised to see Rudra praying next to her. Her eyes widened in shock. However, they relaxed once she saw the concentration on his face. She wondered what he was praying for and what caused him to actually bow his head before Him. When he opened his eyes, Rudra looked at Parvati smiling at him, as if waiting for a response to the sudden action. He gently shook his head and took her hand. They walked out of the mandir without saying a word, but feeling a newfound peace within them. Even if it was just for that moment, everything felt perfect.

Paro would never know that Rudra vowed to Him to keep her happy. She would never know that Rudra declared that he would remain indebted to Bholenath for saving her from Death's clutches. She would never know that he asked Bholenath to keep her safe because he would die if anything happened to her. But most of all, Parvati would never know that Rudra had thanked Bholenath for loving him, despite all his mistakes and sins, so much that He gave him Parvati to complete his soul.

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So sweet, right? Let me know what you think by leaving your comments and feedback below.

Next update: Tejawat's return! Dun dun DUN!

Thanks for reading!