Downfall of SD, Updt on BB Pg 9, Abhay Updt Pg 18-DT NT Pg21&31

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Mihrimah Ahmed

@ShadeOfWhite

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 11 years ago

#61

Originally posted by: MaddyO

Tamy WOW super 👏👏👏

zeh naseeb😳

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Mihrimah Ahmed

@ShadeOfWhite

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 11 years ago

#62

Originally posted by: history_geek

Tamy,
I have not seen the spoiler pics, but if they are out then they surely point towards one thing - A war is in offing...And, i THINK that Suja will perish while defending Jalal...Let's see what happens...

PS -- Nice comment. I came to know about Tulsi/Parvati of the "K-fame series" of Ekta Kapoor from this forum... ab yeh Prerna kaun hai, i don't know...😉

OMG Abhay u didnt know about the FAMOUS Tulsi/Parvati before coming to this forum??😲😲 aisa kaise hosakta hai!?😲😲 yeh toh gunah-e-azeem hai!😲😆😆

Prerna is also a K lead...popular K lead.😉

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Charu

@Charu.S

Voyager

Posted: 11 years ago

#63

Originally posted by: RadhikaS0
Hi All,
I am trying to post a response, but not able to due to being busy. :(
In the meanwhile, I am copy pasting a post from Lasya in the thread "JA: The Constant Shadow". This post talks about marriage in an extremely sincere manner and I think it is apt for any marriage, not just for JJ, for whom Lasya wrote this.

This post should (though it does NOT) apply to SD-BB also in ideal circumstances:

************************************************************************************************

Marriage is a full time job being honest one moment at a time, remembering to love, to honor, to respect. It is a practice, a discipline, worthy of every moment.

As you said, in your quote,it needs no religion, no boundaries and exceptions. It is just a matter of understanding.Once if you understand your partner, then the marriage is successful, whatever may be the grounds on which this relation was formed.
No matter what, you try to become your partner's strength and accompany him/her in any circumstances.

"The greatest marriages are built on teamwork. A mutual respect, a healthy dose of admiration,
and a never-ending portion of love and grace."

That's the reason why Jodha-Jalal are being remembered till date.Their marriage was a political alliance,emerging into a wonderful relationship,flourishing wonderfully.

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed.😉

The scene where Jodha tries to wake the INNER SHEHENSHAH was very well screeenplayed, with beautiful dialogues.⭐️
I just loved the whole scene. It was so pure and beautiful.👏

"A strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It is a husband and wife who take turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak."

To concude,I would just like to say one thing:

Nobody can predict the future. You just have to give your all to the relationship you're in and do your best to take care of your partner, communicate and give them every last drop of love you have. I think one of the most important things in a relationship is caring for your significant other through good times and bad.

Very profound words Radhika and Lasya , .

Edited by JAfanCharu - 11 years ago

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RadhikaS0

@RadhikaS0

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#64

Bakshi Bano

Some of the members have wondered why Bakshi is weak when her background is royal and she is pampered to such an extent by everyone.

I think personality is something that has nothing to do with background. It is something one is born with mostly, and something one develops due to life's experiences.

I am not surprised to see that Bakshi is insecure and totally lacking in confidence. And she is not able to handle / face emotional experiences / loss with equanimity. Who else do we know who has similar emotional issues? Why, her brother, of course.

Who else do we know who is unable to open up easily to anyone, even his mother? Her brother.

I observed in case of Jalal and I am observing in the case of Bakshi that Hamida is very righteous with them. She has very high standards and expects them to live up to those standards of moral conduct. This is good in its own way.

But a mother has to be there to break the fall when a child is not able to meet her standards and sometimes takes a wrong step.

When Jodha left Agra in the separation track, Hamida was indignant with Jalal and took away Jodha's portrait from him. She was loyal to Jodha but let down her son who needed her counsel and guidance then.

When Bakshi was exposed in the Jodha FP case, again Hamida slapped her and cut off ties with her. I can understand an initial wave of anger. But tempers cool and then the mother must take responsibility for what happened. She must ensure that the prodigal son / daughter returns to the right track.

When Bakshi was having labour pains, JJ came to visit her. I was shocked that no one else - Hamida, Salima, Ruq - came to see her or spend time with her.

Someone had remarked that Bakshi seems to live in a hotel. It may partially be her fault. But partially it is also the fault of her family. The Hamida - Gul Badan - Jijianga gang. They mouth platitudes to everyone in the younger generation - Jo, Ruq, Bakshi, Salima etc. But when these younger women have some personal problems, the matrons are nowhere to be seen.

Likewise, agreed that Bakshi did a major mistake in hiding the gender of the child. Jodha did try to assure her that they hadn't come to taunt her but understand why she had lied. But I didn't sense any empathy in the voices or looks of the other ladies. One of them should have hugged Bakshi close and assured her first of being there for her under all circumstances and of trusting her enough to know that she must have had a strong reason to lie.

When SD came in and started talking insultingly with Hamida too, none of the ladies objected. They, in a very typical manner, sided with SD and objected to Bakshi lying to him. Had they not sensed anything amiss in the SD-BB marriage in all this while? Shouldn't they have had more faith in a girl from their family? Shouldn't they have created an environment in which the girl could approach them with her problems?

I felt slightly disappointed with the reaction of the royal women - it was to be expected, of course. But like Jodha asked, why are wrong reactions acceptable to us so much that they appear right / normal to us?

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RadhikaS0

@RadhikaS0

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#65

Originally posted by: tamy267

OMG Abhay u didnt know about the FAMOUS Tulsi/Parvati before coming to this forum??😲😲 aisa kaise hosakta hai!?😲😲 yeh toh gunah-e-azeem hai!😲😆😆

Prerna is also a K lead...popular K lead.😉

Tamy

I have also only heard the names but never seen them. 😊

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RadhikaS0

@RadhikaS0

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#66

Bakshi Bano (contd.)

Bakshi suffered widowhood early in life, just like Salima Begum. Jalal gave Salima respectability, security and companionship. He ensured that his sister too was similarly provided a second chance in life.

Bakshi, by nature, is meek and submissive. She is not able to express her inner feelings / views / opinions in front of anyone. Not even her mother. I sympathize with her in the same manner in which I sympathize with Jalal. If Jalal had a tough childhood, separated from his parents and growing up amidst war and conspiring / backstabbing relatives, then his sister must have had a similar experience. Jalal had Bairam Khan and Mahamanga to take care of him. But may be Bakshi had none to go to when she felt insecure.

Lets not look at her background now. Lets look at her growing up years.

Jalal loves her, no doubt. But it is also a truth that though the Mughals love each other, they do not communicate openly and freely with each other.

Also, many women hesitate to talk about their husbands (and the problems they face together) with their own family even now. Even educated, working, city girls. It is a mindset problem. Women believe that they shouldn't trouble their family with such issues. They feel that it is something between them and their husbands and they shouldn't involve anyone else. Often, they feel embarrassed to admit they have a failing marriage.

Didn't we see Jodha couldn't talk to her mother about the problems she had with Jalal in the separation track? Even before that, Jodha once persuaded Jalal to pretend in front of her parents that they were happily married.

It happens with the best of us. And if mothers are as self-righteous as Hamida or Mainavati, then the problem is compounded.

We saw that Mainavati took Jalal's side and berated Jodha for not going back with him. Hamida too would not support her daughter against her son-in-law. She would expect Bakshi to adjust and keep her husband happy.

Could Bakshi have revolted against SD?

He is physically abusive. She is dead scared of him - as we saw in her reactions to him last night. She just doesn't have the strength of mind to revolt and hold her own against him.

Yes, she can throw the weight of her family around. But to what avail? She will end her marriage with her own hands. And it is this situation she doesn't want.

In the 16th century, life was difficult for single women. Esp if those women didn't have the courage to face the ups and downs of life on their own.

Jodha is so courageous and can live on her own. Yet she also mentions sometimes that in that society, there is no place for a woman who has been left by her husband.

Yesterday we saw that most royal ladies were sympathetic with SD and blamed Bakshi for the state of affairs. They felt SD was right in wanting a son and Bakshi had been at fault for not only bearing a daughter instead of a son, but also of hiding the fact and letting him be embarrassed in public.

If Bakshi asks them for help, would these ladies drop their cloak of self-righteousness and help her? I am skeptical.

I am reiterating that I know Bakshi did a wrong thing. But we have to see what led to this state of affairs. And what prevented the ladies from finding a solution to her problem.

Bakshi is a classic case of domestic abuse in which the girl is scared / embarrassed to ask for help and her family is not willing to get involved and resolve things for her. Jalal is an exception. But Bakshi knows that to tell Jalal of SD's deeds would be certain death for SD.

To be honest, she is being selfish in wanting to save her marriage at any cost, even at the cost of her brother's pride or her bhabhi's honor. She doesn't even have a clue how to save her daughter. But she is also a dumb girl who can neither think on her own nor ask someone else for help.

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preet

@preetgurti

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 11 years ago

#67

Radhika
jodha muz pe your pov I wanna read if u have time do write
jodha akbar journey to this phase together where she is his light in dark tunnel

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ayushimehra

@ayushimehra

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#68

Originally posted by: tamy267

u r on a roll Ayushi😳
wonderful!⭐️

Thanks Tamy, Your Post insipred me😆 😆

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Rashmi81

@Rashmi81

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#69

Originally posted by: RadhikaS0
Bakshi Bano (contd.)
Bakshi suffered widowhood early in life, just like Salima Begum. Jalal gave Salima respectability, security and companionship. He ensured that his sister too was similarly provided a second chance in life.

Bakshi, by nature, is meek and submissive. She is not able to express her inner feelings / views / opinions in front of anyone. Not even her mother. I sympathize with her in the same manner in which I sympathize with Jalal. If Jalal had a tough childhood, separated from his parents and growing up amidst war and conspiring / backstabbing relatives, then his sister must have had a similar experience. Jalal had Bairam Khan and Mahamanga to take care of him. But may be Bakshi had none to go to when she felt insecure.

Lets not look at her background now. Lets look at her growing up years.

Jalal loves her, no doubt. But it is also a truth that though the Mughals love each other, they do not communicate openly and freely with each other.

Also, many women hesitate to talk about their husbands (and the problems they face together) with their own family even now. Even educated, working, city girls. It is a mindset problem. Women believe that they shouldn't trouble their family with such issues. They feel that it is something between them and their husbands and they shouldn't involve anyone else. Often, they feel embarrassed to admit they have a failing marriage.

Didn't we see Jodha couldn't talk to her mother about the problems she had with Jalal in the separation track? Even before that, Jodha once persuaded Jalal to pretend in front of her parents that they were happily married.

It happens with the best of us. And if mothers are as self-righteous as Hamida or Mainavati, then the problem is compounded.

We saw that Mainavati took Jalal's side and berated Jodha for not going back with him. Hamida too would not support her daughter against her son-in-law. She would expect Bakshi to adjust and keep her husband happy.

Could Bakshi have revolted against SD?

He is physically abusive. She is dead scared of him - as we saw in her reactions to him last night. She just doesn't have the strength of mind to revolt and hold her own against him.

Yes, she can throw the weight of her family around. But to what avail? She will end her marriage with her own hands. And it is this situation she doesn't want.

In the 16th century, life was difficult for single women. Esp if those women didn't have the courage to face the ups and downs of life on their own.

Jodha is so courageous and can live on her own. Yet she also mentions sometimes that in that society, there is no place for a woman who has been left by her husband.

Yesterday we saw that most royal ladies were sympathetic with SD and blamed Bakshi for the state of affairs. They felt SD was right in wanting a son and Bakshi had been at fault for not only bearing a daughter instead of a son, but also of hiding the fact and letting him be embarrassed in public.

If Bakshi asks them for help, would these ladies drop their cloak of self-righteousness and help her? I am skeptical.

I am reiterating that I know Bakshi did a wrong thing. But we have to see what led to this state of affairs. And what prevented the ladies from finding a solution to her problem.

Bakshi is a classic case of domestic abuse in which the girl is scared / embarrassed to ask for help and her family is not willing to get involved and resolve things for her. Jalal is an exception. But Bakshi knows that to tell Jalal of SD's deeds would be certain death for SD.

To be honest, she is being selfish in wanting to save her marriage at any cost, even at the cost of her brother's pride or her bhabhi's honor. She doesn't even have a clue how to save her daughter. But she is also a dumb girl who can neither think on her own nor ask someone else for help.

Indian women do tend to put husbands at pedestal.That " suhaag" is still a very prominent issue then be it 16th century or the current one.Though we are very independent ,we do look into marriage as a kind of support or protection.That companionship and all comes later on.Whats the major idea behind getting married atleast for 21st century girls ? Physical needs - Then the couples are getting bolder and bolder nowadays and pre martial sex is not unheard thing in India,atleast in big cities .If you are in love marriage then it's ok that you want to be together,But what about arranged marriages? They still are very popular in India and this you can see by flourishing business of " Shaadi .com" .How do they motivate you to get married? Family pressure or society pressure?

May be because we don't want to be alone all our life.We do need somebody with whom we can share our life and problems.Though we have parents and friends and all but nobody can take place of a spouse.

And Bakshi's main fear lies here-She doesn't want to be alone all her life.

21st century girls have their own career to keep then busy but what about 16th century girls.Did they have this career and all ? Marriage was their career and their ultimate destination.So if that very own husband is not there ,the life was empty for them as they had nothing else in life rather than their "Ghar grahasti".

Not all girls are Jo ,who can stand up against injustice.And again intelligent as MUZ who did have her own career like her trading ,her administration work of Sultanate and all.

And Radhika ,it's not HB and Mainvati but most mothers expect their girls still to adjust in her failing marriage .Still most mothers won't encourage a girl coming back home.

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RadhikaS0

@RadhikaS0

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#70

Originally posted by: preetgurti
Radhika
jodha muz pe your pov I wanna read if u have time do write
jodha akbar journey to this phase together where she is his light in dark tunnel

Logged in for a minute. going again. :)

Preet, the best person to talk about MUZ on the entire forum is Abhay. No one can talk about her and Akbar like him.

If I get time, I will surely write about it. But...

@Abhay: Please consider this as a request from me and Preet. 😊