Arshi FF: The Valiant Knight - Thread 4 - COMPLETED - Page 90

Kya chahiye beta aapko...[What do you need son?]

Pata Nahi...[I dont know]

Kyun? Sab ko kuch na kuch chahiye, Jaise ki Mujhe abhi chai peena ka mann kar raha hai...Boliye aapko ko kuch tho chahiye? [Why? Everyone needs something or the other, like I want to have tea now. So tell me what do you want?]

The young boy nodded in negative and shrugged in confusion, Mere paas kuch hain hee nahi ki mein bol sakoon mujhe kya chahiye, kya nahi chahiye...[I have nothing with me to know what I need and what I dont] The boy looked away at the traffic not willing to show the embarrassment of his life.

The old man took a moment to digest his words. Kya karthe ho aap? [What do you do?]

Woh aadmi keliye kaam kartha hoon...Bheek maang tha hoon..[I work for that man..I beg] The young boy let out a small smile.

Kuch aur kaam karoge? [Do you want to work anything else?]

The boy nodded No.

Kyun? [Why?]

Mujhe kaam nahi karna hain abhi. Uskeliye poori zindagi padi hain...[I dont want to work now, I have my entire life for that]

Tho kya karna hain? [Then what do you want to do?]

The young boy shifted his gaze to the school kids passing by. The old man couldnt help but notice a glint of sadness in the boy's brown eyes that shone under the afternoon Sun.

Lagta hain aapko Padhai karni hain? [Looks like you want to study?]

The boy didnt say anything, bent his head down and picked up a stone and fiddled with it.

Meri beti Doctor banna chahti hain, aur beta meri tarah business man..Agar aap padenge tho aapko kya banna hain? [My daughter wants to become a doctor, my son wants to become business man like me...if you study, what do you want to become?]

Pata Nahin, lekin Mujhe bahuth padayi karke, khoob paisa kamanaa hain...[I dont know, But I want to study alot, earn alot]

The old man eyes saw stubborn determination and feistiness in the young boy...Aapka asli naam kya hain? [what is your real name?

Ek hee naam hain..Chote..[I have only one name, Chote]

Hmm Arnav kaisa laga aapko? [Hmm How do you like Arnav]

Acha hain...[Good]

Aur Arnav Singh Raizada kaisa laga? [And Arnav Singh Raizada]

Acha hain..Kiska naam hain? The boy asked innocently..[Very good...Whose name is it?]

Bataoongaa...pehle aap yeh batayiye Kya karenge itna saara paisaa kamake...[I will tell, first tell me what will you do with money you earn?] The old man chuckled..

Agar Paise honge thoo, sab log mujhe pyaar karenge...SAB LOG..Woh aadmi bhi, jo mujhe har din peet tha hain...Aur Meri maa.. jo mujhe chodke gayi hain...Unko doondna hain..Kahee bhi hain, agar paise ho tho mein unhe doond ke hee rahunga...[If I have money, everyone will love me, Everyone...Including that man who beats me every day, My mother who abandoned me...I have to search for her..Wherever she is, if I have money I will find her]

The old man teared up and cleared his throat to gain composure hearing the innocent dream...Tho chaliye Arnav Singh Raizada...Mission Mother and Mission Love...[Lets go Arnav Singh Raizada]

Arnav Singh Raizada??...

Hmm aajse aapka naam..[Hmm Your name from today]

Mein samjha nahin...Aur Mujhe englisss nahi aati..[I didnt get you and I dont understand english]

Oh matlab.. Mission matlab..hmm...pata nahin hindi mein kya bolte hain..woh sab chodo..Aap aajse khud keliye aur sab keliye Arnav Singh Raizada, mera beta hain...Humare saath aayiye...Hum padayenge aapko..Ek din aapko aapki maa aur PYAR bhi milegaa...[Mission meaning...hmmm I dont know what to say in Hindi..Leave all that...From this day onwards, for your own and for everyone, You are Arnav Singh Raizada, My Son...You come with me...I will sponsor your education..One day you will find your Mother and your LOVE]

Love...Khushi...Epitome of Love...Thats exactly what he thought of her 48hours ago...But now in the blink of an eye, the veil is up and true colors are out...He sighed in deep loss as he felt the muscles around his heart swelling up to choke it.

Love, Affection, Emotions, Feelings...these words always found a very cozy corner aloof from Arnav's life. Though he sucked for these emotions when young, it didnt take him long to realize that those words were not written for him and dont exist in his dictionary. And he never had to dig through the reasons to convince himself as people around pretty much reminded him that he is what he is today at the mercy of the name tag Raizada..

Standing for little more than 5 hours in the same spot where Aman left him in balcony, Arnav couldnt help but reminisce his journey as Raizada to this day. He hoped a family the day he moved into RM but never got so lucky. Anjali and Adi were very stubborn kids losing their mother at very young age. It took several years for Nani to understand and accept Arnav. Abhivanth constantly being on business trips never had much emotional bonding with Arnav. Aman at the time being the tail of the other two never really cared for Arnav until the Jail incident happened.

The unknown people, traffic, garbage were his friends when he was once a street boy but the moment he stepped into luxurious palace, walls, pens & books became his friends. Though Abhivanth stood like pillar to guide Arnav in career, he was very tough man and many times got pushy, like how he put Arnav in the English Medium School from the very first class. Unable to understand a single word, the jokes, the dressing, the new culture Arnav feared and started to feel very out of place. 

No friends to mingle, no teachers too keen to show interest in him as he was a burden with zero knowledge..He was a toddler at his 13years learning the phonics. The age where usually young boys brag about their new teen status, try to impress girls and experience they first crush and kisses...the tender age where they feel emotionally charged with hormones. But Arnav never knew what it is to have a crush, to have a girl friend or even a best friend. The low esteem didnt allow him to try even though he was very good looking, he always looked dumb to many people. Soon books became his best friends..He read and only reading was his past time and the first magazine he read was TIME contrary to Filmfare kids of his age ogle at. With the raw talent, immense knowledge, and analytic power, he soon raised the expectations on himself. Things started changing drastically as Arnav topped the charts of his 10th grade and 12th grade.

If Abhivanth was alive this day, he would outright deny any involvement in the success of ASR. Though Abhivanth took the first decision of sending ASR to English Medium School, it was Arnav who took every other decision in his life. He knew exactly and precisely what he wanted. Right from which book to which tutor to which college. Abhivanth nearly had heart attack when Arnav one fine night announced that he applied to Harvard with the pocket money he received for his birthday. And since then there was no stopping of ASR. The loneliness of all these years didnt help Arnav build confidence to strike a conversation with peers until he joined for BBA and MBA in Harvard, the place that really brought the best of out of him. He deeply rooted himself with the westernized culture which is well known for Do-as-you-please philosophy. It suited him, and his private life.

Just as he thought he started admiring what life is, just about the moodiness was warding off his character, he got the news of his god father admitted in hospital. He still remembers that day, as he was in MBA, Fall Semester in the middle of giving an exam when one of his friends announced the news. The next moment he left everything to see the old man who gave him second chance. And that was the last class he ever attended as his angel one more time pushed him to take over the large empire at the age of 21, the age where a boy turns to man in feelings, emotions, and love. One more time, Arnav Singh Raizada missed what is it to be in love, to learn a woman. Soon files, contracts, meetings became his best friends and occasional flings to satisfy his hormones.  The silent and moody Arnav Singh Raizada turned into grumpy, angry and arrogant adult as he started signing the paychecks of people.

But somewhere his life was not complete. Ofcourse affection part was there from Nani and Aman...but No one made him feel emotional, no one stirred feelings, no one made him fall in love...Not that he ever refused, he was forced not to have a choice, which eventually made him believe that they dont exist and are very immaterial leading to only destruction. He never gained anything from those words which is why he strongly believed he didnt lose anything in life until Khushi entered his life..but then he lost major part of him...He lost his heart.  

Heck..anything and everything in his life upto this point is donated by generous Raizadas, including his freaking name...his education, his food, his clothes, the company..every single thing...He never took credit for himself behind the enormous success of AR after the take-over. He had been always grateful but at the same time, they never belonged to him by right, by heart...

If there was anything that ever belonged to him, it was Her...only Her...and probably it will only be Her...She was the only one he thought as his...A man who considered nothing as his in life except that one special woman, and seeing her the way he never imagined to, shook him and devastated him...He was not an ordinary man, he was born loser, always been loser to react like a normal Man who would barge into the door and beat the life out of the couple...And the horrendous act was not such a simple making-you-jealous issue type for him to react out of possesiveness...It was his heart in question and when heart is in question, in pain, in shock, Mind dont meddle with it except that it allows the heart to cry it out and run its course to come of out of it...

He tried, for many hours he tried to reason that she is not Khushi. But then, the first thing that ever connected them is their eyes. He saw more than his eyes could. He hated her that moment for showing him her best and her worst, so much he couldnt think beyond what he saw that night. What has happened should not have happened. If thats what she wanted, she shouldnt have acted all innocent with him.

Many times he picked up the phone to call security to find if there were any people, precisely men who frequently visited her in his absence. The putrid doubts already eating him alive but he restrained himself to make that call because he knew if the answer is not what he wants it to be, he will bury himself hating her for the rest of his life, more than his heart could handle.

His phone blinked with text message that read DONE! He looked at it briefly and shoved it into his pants...

He was hurt and deeply hurt. He lived better life without those feelings and emotions...She did big mistake stirring those up and leaving him to rot. She is going to pay for it and he will make sure she pays for every bit of it...But then that reminded him Aman's words..Will he able to tolerate the pain in her eyes...Will be he able to continue life normal as if nothing happened. The answer is NO, but that doesnt mean people has right to stab ASR and he better nip the bud before it spreads. He cannot let another woman decide his fate. He knew what he needs to do and picked up the phone.

jis lamhay meray khoon say teri maang saji thi
aik anjan say rishtay mein tu mujh say bundhi thi
jayse jayse tu zindagi mein shamil hoti gaye
tu sirf meri aur sirf meri hoti gaye..
tujh ko perdhna bina bolay meri aadat bungaye
teray khushq ansoon deekhna  meri aadat bungaye
teri masoom aadaon per dil dey beytha...
teri mazboot iradoon per dil dey beytha...
bauhat chaha tujhay,tujh ko apna maana
teri hur dua ko bena kahay apna banana chaha..
per tu wohi nikli,hamesha ki terhan zalim duniya jayse
naa aitabar keh kabil,aur nah hee meri pyaar k kabil..
yeh dua hay tera yeh fareeb kash meri ankhoon ka dhooka hojaye..
kiyon k iss k baad yeh dil phir kabhi nahi muskura paye ga kis k leay...

***Credit Thank You Lala..Amazing words...Apt for Arnav

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Its been 4 hours since Khushi spoke to Natasha and yet there was no sign of him or Aman. She didnt want to call Nani or Anjali and put them in stress without knowing what actually happened. Several calls but everything went to his voicemail...The rings kept ringing, she had no choice but to leave messages.

As she was preparing herself coffee to calm her aching head, the hot drops fell on her palms and she hissed in pain. She put her hands under cold water and a smile crept up as she remembered something that happened few days ago when he was in boston...the night when both turned awkwardly silent over the phone without saying a word...She found it very intimate as if he shushed her standing infront of her and looking at her fondly making her butterflies flutter with his mere presence. It took very long time for them to realize that they hadnt spoken anything for mins...And when he spoke, his statement meant alot for her...

The texture of your palm says how hard you worked in your life. He said imagining her hands in his.

They are getting softer these days. I am hardly working now. She smiled observing her hands as if they are in his hold...

So May I assume that you are happy with the decision of marrying me? He asked curving his upper lip into his trademark smirk...his voice sounding a little anxious for her answer.

She suppressed her smile and pretended to give a serious thought while he waited anxiously. Its alright. Not a great decision of my life.

Excuse me? Prompt anger clearly heard in his voice.

Aur nahi tho kya.

She giggled imagining the beautiful patterns he always drew on her hand which he lately developed the peculiar habit.

But that made her realize that it is very out-of his character not to return any of her calls, or to take off from work without informing her. As she saw herself in the antique mirror hung in the dining room, she felt something is really wrong. First the bruises...he couldnt have hurt her especially after the way he withdrew himself on the night of his departure to Boston when he felt she is not comfortable and even if he did, he would be sitting next to her tending her. This is not Arnav she knew, he never abandoned her when she is in pain even when she was his worst enemy. All day she had been thinking why wasnt he there when she woke up especially after the night when they took the relation to whole new level. That doesnt mean anything to him? Is he really ignoring me? The questions pricked her mind making her more restless than ever.  And then like every other wife, she panicked worrying if he met with any accident and if he is trying to hide it from her...She grabbed the address book he left for her that has all the emergency contacts. She flipped through the pages and looked for AR and Aman address. She noted it down and called the security that she will be down in mins and she needs to go out. And what she heard gave another blow...

Ma'm, Sir asked us not to drive you anywhere.

What? When did he call you?  

Just few hours ago.

OK..She hung up the phone in feeble voice unable to understand anything. He is in contact with everyone but me. She was sure something is just about to happen as her guts wrenched in unpleasant feeling. This is not so him...Any decision related to her, he approached her first.

Not giving up, she grabbed her handbag to visit Aman's place when her phone rang.

She sighed irritated and picked up the phone, Ramana not now..I am bus..She was stopped as her eyes narrowed in shock..

My husband was so excited to finally find a job that interests him and if you really had to fire him why did you give him job.

Who are you? What are you saying?

I am Ramana's wife. He is so devastated..And thanks to you such merciless rich rogues..

Just shut up and tell me what went wrong?

What went wrong? You are asking me what went wrong after throwing him out in the middle of the day and demolishing the entire building, saying that his services are not needed...

What? Who? She clutched her head as it started spinning faster than she could hold...My business...She uttered as the lady cursed and hung up the phone.

Her fingers trembled and phone fell on the rug. She frantically grabbed it to try Arnav one more time. And before her shaky fingers could unlock the phone, his name flashed on her phone...

She barely heard the ring and fired her questions..Arn..woh..woh business..what happened t..Wait where were you? I have been trying for you since morning like mad woman..Are you OK?

Arnav closed his eyes painfully...hearing her voice that managed to deceive him for one more time that moment...and he shot his arm holding the phone away from his ears..her moans ringing in his ears...Words failed to string together and after brief moment, he brought the phone to his ears clearing his throat. He took deep breath and his voice modulated to sound as cruel as it could be...

I am assuming you already heard about the business.

Yeah..What happened? Who did that?

I...He waited for reaction but he knew one letter blew her mind...I did that..

Wha...Her voice choked in shock, eyes narrowed in confusion, unable to believe and comprehend what he is saying.

Let me make it easy for you...THIS is the beginning...Anything that ties you to me will be destroyed. Every thought of yours will be shackled. Every decision of yours will be screwed. Every action of yours will be curbed. So, officially, your business just suffered a scrape.  

I dont understand...Wha..What are you saying?

Exactly what you heard. In simple words, I am going to wreck your life from this moment.

Kyun? I thought we...I dont understand...I cant imagine you are saying all these..Khushi could feel being stabbed repeatedly.

30 mins..30 mins is all you got to pack and leave my house and my premises.

Finally Khushi got the point what he meant by her destruction when he first came to meet her at her shop in Hyderabad. It all made sense to her. So now you are throwing me out because you are done with me? You faked all these just to possess me? this care, concern, your sorrys, everything is just a pretense to use me?   

Arnav chuckled in a mocking tone...What an irony? I cant believe YOU are saying all these after what you did...Just for the record, I am throwing you out because my house, my bedroom is not a br*thel and I hav...

What the hell did you just mean? Tell me you didnt call me pr*stitute now...Tell me NOW..She barked over the phone...

The glass in Arnav's hand shattered piercing its fragments into his palm...He hissed in pain and he hated her more for saying those words out of her mouth. Did he mean it? NO, Did he even related her to the word...No...but its too late and the delay in his response due to the physical pain unacceptable in such hostile situation...

Khushi was heart broken...A moment silence was the least she expected from him and before he could say a word...I get it... She hung up the phone. No woman can ever tolerate her love implying along those terms...Never...

Khu...Just like he expected and wanted it was over. Everything between them collapsed before even they could build it. He felt guilty for giving her a moment of silence but eventually her words only fueled his anger more. She has no right to control his feelings, not like this, not anymore.

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Part 2 Next Post

The moment Khushi hung up the phone, she sprinted to the cupboard, took her bag dumped her clothes and walked out of the room. Is she thinking anything? NO, Her mind is blocked and she couldnt process anything but if she knows any little thing that is, she dont deserve to be treated like this. Nobody has any right to treat her the way it happened in last few mins. The reality yet far from realization, She hurtled her feet to the front door. She opened the door and as she was about to step her feet out of the house, she realized, She is one step away from disowning everything she thought as hers. She retreated her step as she realized there are so many things on her that belongs to him, including her heart which was no longer in her possession. She turned back and looked around the house for one last time.

Without her permission, her feet dragged her back to the bed, where they shared so much of each other, where she gave herself away...

My shoulder is big enough to comfort you...She remembered his words and chuckled mocking her ownself...

She removed her mangalsutra and placed it on the bed, including the jewellery the Raizadas gave. Then followed the pile, her toe rings, the credit cards, the cell phone he bought her, the locker key he gave her, including house keys. She hurried her steps and found the fish bowl on her way out. She grabbed her handbag and pulled out the checkbook. She took next couple of mins, summing up the amounts, including the recent expenses of sarees and lingerie. Everything came down 62K. She mentally calculated, she will be left with 30K, her only savings that are left. But she didnt think twice to write a cheque considering the only savings left.

Her fingers hesitated to write his name not in fear or any other feeling but in abhor and disgust. So she left it blank, wrote the amount, signed it and placed it on the counter under the water jug, the first place in the house he pays visit to quench his thirst when comes from outside.

Without turning back, she exited the house the way she entered except that there is nothing left in her to call her as hers...

If only had he come to throw her out in person, he would have witnessed how physically bruised she was...If and only if...

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It was humid evening with Sun still burning high in rage. Its been 72mins precisely, Khushi took the wooden bench that almost aged and ready to give up beaten by the passengers of Mumbai trains. 4 more hours to kill the time for her to be on her way to the destination, her home town Hyderabad.

Fiddling with the ticket absentmindedly, her eyes were fixed on the dust particles that tried to reach the sky under the sun rays but failed after desperate attempts..Thats exactly what she had been watching for last 75mins as she refused to think what happened to her, or one can say she denied to acknowledge that she is thinking of her broken heart, broken marriage, the only relation she ever had with a man.

For long moments, everything around her felt numb and silent. She swept her lashes up from the ground to the eye level and saw people smiling, talking, and few boys punching playfully. But she couldnt hear anything. Their smiles screamed that she is a fool. Their raised eyebrows shouted that she was used. She forced herself to look away, to ignore unable to bear the reflection of her own eyes accusing her. Her gaze shifted to find the train tracks and first thing that came to her mind was where she is. She had no clue, why and how she got there. Her mind pre-occupied with thoughts of betrayal, she absolutely had no clue, what actions she took in last one hour until she saw the ticket to Hyderabad.   

Was she crying over her deeds of trusting a man blindly? Undoubtedly Yes, her heart is shuddering with silent weeps, her mind shut off like dead mass, her shoulders drooped in defeat and her eyes lifeless, dry, and absolutely clean slate with no emotion. The tears that she is supposed to shed suddenly bursted from the ired sky that started turning gloomy..no worse than her situation was.

Her eyes fell on the couple getting cozy near by the pillar. She smiled remembering their moments on the terrace, the first kiss they shared. Loving him has been like breathing to her. It all happened natural, unexpected without much effort at her end. She didnt know how to be loved until he showed her creating an atmosphere of euphoric excitement though he never said a word. Euphoric! thats what she thought of their relation, because she didnt know any other way to compare. Soon her face turned into horror and the next moment, she found her fingers frantically wiping her neck and collarbone, which raised few eyebrows of the people passing by. She grabbed the water bottle and splashed it on her face again and again and wiping her skin in disgust...what she failed or couldnt do was, she didnt touch or try to purify her marred lips the only part her husband owned and the only part the monster didnt touch...Her subconscious mind didnt let her do that injustice...

Disgust...

Thats exactly what she felt of herself. Her mind in its own volition played its game as her hands trembled washing every part of her naked skin. Her hands, arms, neck..She turned frenzy not minding people watching her acting weird. She needed to get rid of him out of her system that very moment. Sadly, she couldnt get rid of the blue black marks from her arms. She felt sickened to let him do that, to let the man she loved most harrass her not only physically but also kill her emotionally. 

But no matter how much she tried, she couldnt feel his touch disgusted, because she couldnt remember how badly was she treated to feel nauseated for the person. The only things that crept up her mind is the way he always tenderly handled her, a total contrast to the situation she now is and that annoyed her even more. She used her nails scratched her skin again and again until her knuckles hardened and locked themselves in pain.

What have you done to me? She whispered giving up and looking at her hands. Though his perfidy is apparent from what he did in last 2 days and said few hours ago, she couldnt stop thinking and accusing herself for trusting him and bringing this relation to this far.

The one who breaks the heart always have the better perspective of the heartbreak than the one who receives it. But in this case Khushi thought she had better idea and his reasons as she remembered his statement once said when they first met in her shop,

Then be prepared to take last breath as I am not backing down even if that means to destroy your everything.

You rubbed me wrong way Ms. Posy. This has become way too personal now. I wont rest till you fail...Good Luck! You need it alot...

She felt lost and disassociated thinking what a sucker and wally she had been made into, making her believe all this real. She scandalized herself for falling in love with him. The fact that she voluntarily gave herself away to him, needled her heart.

Anyone in her place would have cried but she abhored and loathed herself for being victim of such dirty game of one month in the name of marriage. She felt her eyes buildng up something and before the drops could form under her lids, she lashed her fingers on her eyelids and pressed her eyes as deep as she could and stopped any moistness to form...She didnt want to cry...She didnt want to cry for the man who took away everything...She didnt want to cry for the man who promised a dream but left her to the world to decay..She didnt want to shed a tear for the man who ruined all her years of hardwork in few hours...not certainly to the man who called her pr*stitute...

Pr*stitute...Br*thel...

The man for whom her heart beats, who once said he admired the woman in her today gave a name she never imagined in her life. The man for whom she used to wait all day, who once said his house is her palace today called it as br*thel after taking away her pride. To think of it, its all meticulously pre-planned to destroy her with a simple drink, to make sure she doesnt remember so that he could assault her so brutally...As she thought more about it, the night was special to him, his  ultimate success and he made sure he added another achievement to the day which he will probably relish for his life. What a repugnant character! She thought.

She regretted all those moments where her intuition repeatedly warned he is complicated...he always presented himself in so many facades making it difficult for her to understand him...Bloody murderer... just because she tried to mess with his reputation...he killed her soul and herself leaving her as a piece of meat.

Remembering his words, she was sure, he will not back off on his threats, the part she clearly understood today. Not being well educated to qualify for an office job, having all money spent on her marriage, she is going to be a burden for her Bua or Payal yet one more time...the truth is he is going to ruin anything she is going to do. But she is not going to stop with her efforts.

She decided...she decided not to run away like coward for no fault of her and will instead stay in Mumbai and look for a job that could earn her living.

But will that alone satisfy her? Will that soothe her devastated heart? The thought of just being used pricked her, what about the pain he put her through by implying nasty things about her. How will she settle scores for letting him take away her treasure, her pride. That led her to take a very anti-social decision but who cares when she has nothing more to lose. Thats the moment she took one more decision, this one to satisfy her bruised heart, to heal the scars on her skin, to override every memory and every assualt on her body with a new assault...the decision which is not only going to kill her already murdered soul, but also will kill everything he took pride till date...His ego...

She cleared her throat and requested a woman sitting next to her on the bench and punched a text from her cellphone making it private...

You want to ruin me..Be my guest...My every destruction will burn you into ashes...I have nothing to lose and but you do have quiet a lot.  The game begins NOW...

She quickly thanked the lady and rushed to the PCO, she called NK...

NK remember how you always wanted to do me favor..Now is the time...Tell me who are your richest clients in Mumbai...

...

Because I need to sleep with them...Hook me up & Count me in...

I had tried my best to keep my heart locked up with immoveable key... I had closed all the openings and ways to my heart keeping my shields up... afraid of heart breaks...scared of break downs...still i was unable to save myself from inevitable...still i did fell in love...as i had to.. cause the knock on my heart was very persistent ...you left me no other choice ...u made the way to my heart...ur constant care managed to bring the crack in my wall...the day i opened the passage to my heart was the day i welcomed with my both open hands the constant pain... I gave u my heart thinking u r different from rest...u ll handle with care... I gave u my soul thinking u different u ll keep it in high spirits... I gave u my core...thinking u r different u ll keep it in pure... I gave u my dreams ..thinking u r different u going to make it reality... I gave u my fears...thinking u r different u going to make me fearless ... I gave u my injured body thinking u different u going to heal me up with ur healing touch... I gave in short my life...thinking that u different u going to treasure it as ur own... Your one betrayal and now c where i stand once again...left with a distorted soul...beatless heart...unbearable scars...cursable dreams...a dark night without its morning ...Iwas afraid of falling in it...but now i am more scared of taking its name "love"...this big accident which happened to me causes many other smaller one in way...

***Credit Lalaaa..You know how much I love these lines

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It chimed 10PM on the wall clock when Arnav walked into his penthouse..Completely dark..abandon and absolutely gothic...He could feel its been so long since he ever walked into his house to find noone precisely her...He turned on the lights and the sharp glow bit his face making him scrunch his face irritated. He took a deep breath and waited at the entrance, an insane part of him hoping that she is still there. But he knew after the message he got from private number, he knew she is not coming back which is exactly he wanted. A want he abhorred vehemently but wished desperately for her own good to keep himself in limits not to hurt her, not in person.

Just as she expected, he walked over to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water when he found her cheque lying under the jug. He gave a thorough look at her rounded letters and noticed no name written on Pay To...He scrunched the paper in grit and flung it away carelessly.

As he turned his heel, he noticed candles on the dining table, which is not something they were used to having them while dining. He stretched his hand to check the laid out dishes and found that she prepared his favorite Chicken Fried Rice with Brown Rice. He clamped his hand on his chair and pressed it against harder hurting himself as he remembered the incident when he pulled her onto her lap. And the next min, his hand lashed the dish onto the floor spreading the rice all over, the very first time he ever threw food in his life.

His eyes stared at his closed bedroom door for a moment and after contemplating he took a step forward and stood in front of it. His fingers shivered as he held the knob and god knows how many long secs he stood like that numb and scared to death. He had no courage to face it again and so he backed off...

He settled on the couch and turned the TV ON, his mind playing flashes of the worst night he ever saw. With each moment he passed, he grew restless and his heart started beating violently... Unable to hold onto the pain any longer, the next moment his feet dragged him to the table, lighted the candles and rushed to the bedroom not caring the hot melted wax burning his skin...He kicked the door open and walked over to the bed and threw the lighted candles onto it...Instantly flames grew up filling the room with smoke, while he absentmindedly sat in a corner watching the flashes of that night burning in flames...

His cellphone flickered with several missed calls from NK & Aman and then followed by text from his source that didnt grab his attention...

She moved into the Women's Hostel, very close to AR...She is safe..Checked the area...

Amidst the raging flames something glinted faintly, and he sprang his knees crawling to the bed and found the items she left...He madly grasped the hot metals from the flames and tried to put off the heat from the mangalsutra and the toe rings...He clutched onto them, frantically rubbing it against his chest precisely where his heart is. The emotion, the pride "She is MINE" he felt when he tied it around her drummed his vulnerable mind as he felt tremors of pain. And like a lifeless leaf, he slumped onto his side drawing his knees closer, his hands clutching onto the bond that tied them, while his cold & lifeless eyes wobbled on the violent flames trying to pick up the shattered pieces of his heart, his dreams that he woven about his hers every single night.

If only you knew how much I...  He whispered as if voice trailed off...

Dil mera hai nasamajh kitna
Besabar ye bewkoof bada
Chahta hai kitna tujhe
Khud magar nahi jaan sakaa

Is dard-e-dil ki sifarish
Ab kar de koi yahaan
Ki mill jaaye isey woh baarish
Jo bhigaa de poori tarah

***Credit to Yaariyan Movie
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