Overrated sanskars - Page 3

Tulsey, I agree with what you have written, Purvi's sanskars are irreproachable. There is nothing wrong with the way Archu has raised her, everything to be applauded. But I agree with Kalapi too, to me what both of you have written are two sides of the same coin.

well problem is not with archana sanskars actually its CV'S SANSKAARS that need to be debated out here seriously whats their problem sisters relation is so lovely sweetest rishta of this world but why in every indian soap esp in ekta soap two sisters were shown falling for same man and fighting for him blaming each other and turning in to worst of enemies...and then one sis have to loose him and attend her sis wedding ceremany with teary eyes ...i just cant feel any thing for arjun character he is responsible for puvi's humiliation and after some time when he will confess his love for purvi in front of everybody rejecting ovi ...then it will be ovi who will going to suffer rejection and humiliation ...arjun will remain a super duper hero making fun of both ovi and purvi's feelings ...if i were at purvi's place i will reject arjun even if he will going to confess and want to marry ...and vise versa if i am in ovi's place i will also reject him i cant live with that man whom suppose to marry my sis...if cv's really want to unite arvi then pls make this track such a way that ovi should understand all this and accept it that arjun happiness lie in purvi ...i cant see one sister is getting married happily while other sister is hurt humiliated rejected...either purvi or ovi.

Originally posted by: Kalapi

Tulsey, I have been debating whether to do any post on Sanskar'to me Sanskar debate is a dead horse that has been beaten enough in this forum'I am not sure if anyone called Archu sanskar bad, rather simply overrated as the title of the post says'to me it seems we are back to square one of the poor vs the rich equation again, and the default simply being poor equates to good sanskar and rich equates to bad sansakar (in reality if this was the case, most of us could have been labeled with bad sanskar, right😃, but let me not divert)'.

To begin with I don't find D's sanskar any bad than that of K's, actually if you think D's were much poorer to Archu and that was why the whole problem in PR started (in the beginning). As I see Savita done an wonderful job (with the help of that alcoholic Damo as her husband, no doubt😊) to raise all her kids, as all of her 3 kids Manav, Vandu and Sachin (I can't remember everything regarding Sachin now, but don't remember anything glaringly bad either in his characterization) turned out pretty good.

Then, when Manav became rich, his (the Arman's ) kids did turn out very well in spite of all the riches which in reality could have made them alcoholic, drug addict or whatnot that happens so often in this world, but so far I see them pretty level headed, except for that accusing feeling against Archu which to me is understandable'(Of course, the Cvs in their infinite wisdom might just show these very qualities in Arman's kids in their quest to glorify Archu's so called Sanskar over the rest of us mortal😊'.anyway I divert again)'In fact, as you yourself say, without the money factor being there in Porvi's life a lot of added complexities are also removed..since having that in enough qualities does buy lot of added addictions as well' so in that section so far Arman's kids has done pretty good too'😃

I won't go in the dressing issue you bring up'I leave it as 'the eye of the beholder''.😊

But to me right now, the point of the debate isn't whether or either Desmukh's sanskar is bad or good against the K's sanskar (as in reality it is really hard to define what constitute a good and a bad sanskar ' rather we in reality criticize sanskar after a particular event ' Sanskar doesn't come in predefined protocol, if it did most parents could be relieved), but rather, the question is,'. if a mom should be so proud of that sanskar or have so much faith in her Sanskar that she ends up pushing her kid at a point of no return'and I say this as mom myself and to me, every mom should leave that door open for the kid to come back home safely, when 'that' situation arise'before declaring so highly her Sanskar to the world at large'😊, my POV of course...

Originally posted by: Tulsey

From what I have seen in Purvi is that she is a sensible, hardworking, trusting,loyal, person. She has strong opinions and she voices them when needed. She is not a happy go lucky girl and she had to work hard for everything that she has. She was raised in a middle class family where every family member worked hard to earn their living for which you need inner strenght, dicipline etc. The society dictates the middle class on how to act and proceed with their actions. Purvi is very much living within those rules. Who would have taught her these values...neightbors? no it would be the people that she lived with or she was around.

there is nothing wrong with the sanskaar's that her mother gave her infact sometimes children that grow without the influence of a male person in their lives e.g a father or an uncle usually go out of hand before they reach puberty.

Archu and her mother were the only 2 people in Purvi's life and these two planted a seed of human values into the subconscious mind of Purvi during her childhood so that adherence of these values becomes part of her nature and keeps on guiding her throughout her life. A person acts according to the ideals which exist in his/her subconscious without being aware of them. Thus Purvi's decisions, her reactions to actions of , others and the quality of her actions depend upon the values existing in her subconscious. Conduct and behaviour of a person are always according to his/her inner values.

We all grew up with lot of values that we got from influential people in our lives. Ask yourself a question...was there not any time in our lives that we did when our conscience told us not to? That is how we end up learning from our judgement. Our judgement could be impaired at times but that does not mean that we had bad sanskaar!

Purvi has much better sanskaar than any young woman in PR. She was young when she had to learn quickly how to defend herself from the world, make money to survive, help out with the house chores, wear appropriate clothes, be respectful to people who deserved respect. She did not have the luxury of getting spoilt like Punni, Ovi, Tej and even Sachin.

She developed feelings for Arjun unknowingly. She was forced to accept her feelings by Arjun. Was there any fault of Purvi here? Only thing is that she did not tell her mother how she felt for Arjun. This was all because the time was not right as her mother was herself going through a hard time with Manav.

Few things happened in a row with poor Purvi.

First the engagement that came from nowhere in Arjun and Purvi's lives. Arjun was not engaged to Ovi at the time when he started loving and dating Purvi. His fault was that he did not connect with Ovi to tell her that. He did make many attempts.

Second, Purvi finds out that Arjun is getting engaged to her sister. Purvi is not like Punni...wanting all good stuff for herself at the cost of any lives.

Third, she is humilated by Punni and Ovi

How much can a person endure???? Purvi can't even stand up for herself in the current situation as she still feels like an adopted daughter. Archana HAS to protect Purvi. Every Tom Dick and Harry is either abusing her, slapping her, mentally torturing her.

Sorry guys I just went overboard...

oohh..love your post. very well written.
like a slap to the saanskar doubters...right there on the face...left and right.

WAIT A MINUTE! HOLD IT!!!
All of you are lauding Archana's sanskars that she has instilled in Purvi,Right?
Well, exactly WHAT are her sanskars? Lets list them out-

1) Husband gets last priority-trumped by needs/convenience of mother,MILand a sauten.
2) Children get a short shift as well-one son lost to sister,adopted son & two new born daughters
handed over to departing heart broken Pati and a sanskarless evil MIL-guarantee THEIR happiness,you think?
3) NO attempt to contact the children-not even ask Vandu to see photos for EIGHTEEN YEARS!
4) Absolute blind obedience to mothers demands
5) 18 tears later husband & kids return-Archana's first priority is to lie to her her mother,primp herself to meet the love of her life dressed in cheap revealing clothes like a frigging Christmas tree or a home coming queen on prom night in some crummy college.
6) ONE brief meeting with husband & adopted son and she once again gives up on her marriage at the say so of the stepson-NO consideration for what the bamboozled HUSBAND may want.
7) She and her mother are living in a house paid for by husband,yet when he comes visiting-her
SANKARS (or even common decency!) don't tell her mother to shut up and show some
gratitude AND respect to the dude who PAID THROUGH HIS nose for the house you are living in.
8) Daughters arrive and Sanskari Arch immediately-with a few token tears-agrees to the insane scheme of LYING to the daughters on the say so of an extremely dodgy step/adopted son
9) She lies to EVERYBODY-her revered mother,her husband & her daughters on the say so of SACHU?? Forget any SANSKARS-she seems incapable of telling the truth to anybody!!
10) She allows her RATHER large slap happy mother to physically assault her husband & Sachu
MOTHE trumps husband & son!
11) Two daughters arrive and she goes to absurd lengths to hide the truth from them
12) Purvi-the rude,insolent daughter is constantly under mining her boss in front of staff, talks infernally loudly,haranguing her boss for all matters NOT connected to work.She is opinionated,stubborn and stupid-all results of Archu's upbringing and the damn sanskars.She is not above lying to her sanskari mother either!
13) The last straw is her defense of Purvi-MY sanskars will never allow Purvi to do something wrong! WAKE UP LADY and smell the coffee! She has been lying to you since she & Arjun found love in the tiny faux airport!
14)She thinks SO low of her husband that she wants to gift him to the eternal sauten who has been waiting in the wings.Has the dude lost the right to decide WHO he wants in his life.Archu is using him like a "Pass the parcel" I will sacrifice my (AND HIS!!) happiness,gift him to the other woman and then we can have a sob fest interrupted by Sulu slapping random people during it.

SO WHICH OF THE ABOVE SANSKARS WOULD YOU WISH UPON YOUR CHILD????

GET REAL!! I'd hate being her or mother to the ill mannered Purvi and Ovi (Is that the plural for Ova these days-has about the same amount of personality as one!) or the scatty Teju or the slimy SACHU-don't know about the rest of you folk!

PS=Warm welcome to the TDD!!

But to me right now, the point of the debate isn't whether or either Desmukh's sanskar is bad or good against the K's sanskar (as in reality it is really hard to define what constitute a good and a bad sanskar ' rather we in reality criticize sanskar after a particular event ' Sanskar doesn't come in predefined protocol, if it did most parents could be relieved), but rather, the question is,'. if a mom should be so proud of that sanskar or have so much faith in her Sanskar that she ends up pushing her kid at a point of no return'and I say this as mom myself and to me, every mom should leave that door open for the kid to come back home safely, when 'that' situation arise'before declaring so highly her Sanskar to the world at large

Tulsey, I agree with what you have written, Purvi's sanskars are irreproachable. There is nothing wrong with the way Archu has raised her, everything to be applauded. But I agree with Kalapi too, to me what both of you have written are two sides of the same coin.

Archu has inculcated great values in Purvi, she is an admirable girl, but what Kalapi is saying, if I understand her right, is that a mother while instilling these values in her child should not be so trustful of those values as to believe that her child will never err because of the values the child has imbibed.

Purvi has not erred as we all know, yet the undue emphasis on those principles she has been raised with, is making her overly guilty of something she has not even done i.e. snatching her sister's fiance. If there was not so much focus placed on those sanskars, maybe Purvi would have felt less burdened and more willing to share her secret love with her mother.

Again, as luvly pointed out, Archu did not bring up the word sanskars until Ovi brought it up. But Archu's insistence on the unwavering quality of her sanskars has only served to make Purvi feel worse. An unfortunate turn of events.

Sopawatcher…I don't agree with you about Purvi's sanskar being superior to all others…but ehh, we could take that up at another time….😉

But rest, you hit the nail right on its head👍🏼….I agree😃

well problem is not with archana sanskars actually its CV'S SANSKAARS that need to be debated out here seriously whats their problem sisters relation is so lovely sweetest rishta of this world but why in every indian soap esp in ekta soap two sisters were shown falling for same man and fighting for him blaming each other and turning in to worst of enemies...and then one sis have to loose him and attend her sis wedding ceremany with teary eyes ...i just cant feel any thing for arjun character he is responsible for puvi's humiliation and after some time when he will confess his love for purvi in front of everybody rejecting ovi ...then it will be ovi who will going to suffer rejection and humiliation ...arjun will remain a super duper hero making fun of both ovi and purvi's feelings ...if i were at purvi's place i will reject arjun even if he will going to confess and want to marry ...and vise versa if i am in ovi's place i will also reject him i cant live with that man whom suppose to marry my sis...if cv's really want to unite arvi then pls make this track such a way that ovi should understand all this and accept it that arjun happiness lie in purvi ...i cant see one sister is getting married happily while other sister is hurt humiliated rejected...either purvi or ovi.

So true Taya….so True👍🏼…it only the actors acting as directed and Ekta mata is getting richer and richer just for us by raising our bp😃…

The points Purvi is given credit should Apply to Manav who was raised in poor family. Mother worked her butt off as father was an alchoholic..He had to start working at very young age to help his mother support and take care of younger siblings...Manav would never forget that upbringing and values raising his kids..

Excellent post kalapi..

aawww Varsha, as we have a saying in my company 'all people (employee/characters etc.) are equal but some are more equal than others' 😉….

Salvatore-Nina great post too..👏