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Kools reporting from base : Varsha's Sachaai OUT in PR
After 3 days of subjecting us to a ZOMBIE flick with a HAVELI setting [ Varsha being the ZOMBIE], PR creatives finally had DAYA on us and ENDED the horror flick called Haveli Ki Raat . The 3 melodramatic Karanjkar sisters , the ETERNAL victims of PR fyi entered Dombivli after the darned car got repaired and entered Karanjkar Home to do yet another fresh drama , much to the concern of poor Manohar .
.I Have done something TERRIBLE Varsha told Slapochana , howling . I have done My SAPNE KHAAK . My IZZAT KHAAK . My SAB KUCH KHAAK . .What do u mean cried Slapochana , always uneasy about this rebellious offspring of hers who never gave her a moment's peace . WHAT HAVE U DONE THIS TIME . Tell me SAAF SAAF . Or I will SLAP u .
Yea ....piped in Manohar hesitatingly and unhappily , , NOT REALLY WANTING TO KNOW , wondering if she had shaved her sasur Mohanrao's head or something with a razor , finding it too frizzly on a sudden whim .
SLAP me ! howled Whimsical Varsha even more . YEA , GO ON ! gimme ur Hardest Slap Mommy ! The BEST of ur best ! Harder than Manav Jeejoo's ! Slap me not ONCE but Many Many times till i get EHSAAS of my wrong doing , my SIN !
Slapochana 's chest started heaving with tension and Manohar wished he had worn a diaper .
Whats it , Whats it that u have done oh dratted daughter cried Slapochana .
I have given up the SUKH of becoming a MAA forever with my hasty action of ABORTION ! KUDRAT has given me TAMACHA on my face ! Now u also give ! GIVE , GIVE , GIVE ! revealed Whimsical Varsha hysterically .
Slapochana GASPED .
ALL KNEW except ME ! And it was MY problem mind u , MY SACHAAI ! And they had the gall to keep it from ME ! Whimsical Varsha admiringly didn't forget her HAQS even in her hysteria , like a true woman libber . They LIED ! LIARS all of em !
She started holding everyone's collar and demanding her HAQ . WHY WHY WHY wasn't I told first , Varsha screamed , crying .
The sisters WEPT , WEPT at her DUKH .
Meanwhile Slapochana's gasp turned into a WHEEZE . In entered the TAMASHA BREEZE .
HUFF HUFF went Slapochana . PUFF PUFF , her ample chest heaving . She was gonna flop right in poor Manohar's arms like Bianca Castafiore .
All ran . Doctor came and said Slapochana needs rest .
Holy Archu fired Whimsical Varsha for being this thoughtless and irresponsible .HOW CUD U DO THIS , she cried with holy anger . Look what u did to our mommy .
I didn't mean it ! cried poor Whimsical Varsha , thinking it was grossly UNFAIR of Holy Archu to preach thus when she had brought on a HEART ATTACK to their poor Dad with her BHAGS MANIA .I JUST CAME TO HER FOR SOLACE !
Mujhe MAAF KARO , MAAF KARO wept Holy Archu , her heart melting . Main tujhe samajh hi nahi PAYI !
Hey Guys : Lets take a moment to discuss the topic of THE NATEEJA OF THE HIDINGS OF BHAGS AND HOLY ARCHU THE DIVINE COUPLE .
They HID from Vaishu ..........she found out Dharmesh's Sachaai in a police RAID in a hotel where her hubby was caught with pants down
They HID from Varsha and she had a hysteria attack after overhearing it and went into ZOMBIE TRANCE , a most UNHEALTHY state mind u
They hid from Sulo and she got ASTHMA ATTACK
Now they r gonna SEND VAISHU BACK to live with that creep by HIDING MORE so Sulo shud not have ANOTHER attack .Wah Wah , what a solution and what a way of handling things .đđđ
The best way to do this is FIRMLY tell Sulo , armed with an asthma pump and a doctor by ur side . The moment she opens her mouth to gasp DO FUS FUS in her open mouth and if something more happens , ask the doctor standing next to u to examine her and haul her to a hospital .But do NOT send ur sister back to live life with that BIGAMIST for GoDs sake !
Sulo is gonna survive this attack as well as she survived all the earlier ones . She gets attacks even when she is HAPPY at weddings . She will bounce back sturdily of course . Poor Manohar is STILL living with her , isn't he ? So why r the 3 sisters weeping buckets of tears for the most natural phenomena in their lives ? The only two solutions to Sulo's problem are
1] Lead lives that r NORMAL so ur mom isnt shocked which u 3 most emphatically dont
2] Break all news to her with a pump and a doc by ur side . But for Gods sake DONT HIDE SACHAAIS and give us headaches .
Varsha telling her MOTHER and breaking down in front of her was strangely a natural thing .She came to her mother as a child is the story .......I understand that part . However grown up u may be , u come to ur mom when ur hit by something for solace . That part of it was brilliant but why show a big tamasha in front of ALL ? Why wasn;t it shown privately ? Varsha's interaction with Sulo and with Satish shud have been a strictly PRIVATE thing .
I hate to say this but the Karanjkar sisters have zero sense of culture and CHEAPEN emotions with their melodramas and hysterias .They turn EVERYTHING into a public spectacle .right from Varsha's gynac problems to a horrifying legal crime { bigamy] .
Meanwhile , reading our commentary , the CVS actually made Manav THINK of his parents yesterday . He TALKED about them in the Haveli Bedroom and was quickly dissuaded by Holy Archu to focus on HER SISTER VAISHOO instead by bringing up HER TOPIC and HER SUFFERING the moment Bhags talked of his parents after such a long time.
If we go and live with ur mommy where will my behen VAISHOO live Bhags ?asked Holy Archu .
Don't worry Holy Archu , I will NEVVER NEVVER dump ur Sister . We will take care of her till the very end . We will ONLY GO there if Mommy allows UR sister to live there too .
Really ? Bhags ! TUM KITNE ACHE HO !
All because YOU are so so ACHI !
SACHI ?
BILKUL EK INNOCENT BACHI !
Innocent Bachi smiled contentedly .What more SUKH cud a woman want than a man who was willing to carry all her sisters to his chawl home when his old mom finally came around and decided to accept him by letting bygones be bygones .
And they lay like brother sister , side by side , staring at the ceiling and thinking of Varsha's Sachaai , Dharmu's Sachaai and racking their brains to see if any other Sachaai needed to be hidden .
Then CVs made Bhags actually CALL Damo Up to inform them he was OK and ALIVE .
BETA how is ur KAAMKAAJ ? Asked Damo . What Kaam Kaaj , sighed viewers . He is frolicking with his saalis and juggling their SACHAAIS while poor Ajit is working his butt off . Had Damo known , he wud have burst out singing
Varsha Aur Dharmu jinka hai Manav Bhai
Dono ke paas itni gehree Sachaai ???
Bappa Wah re teri Khudaai
Kaisi yeh tune Duniya Banaai !
Instead Damo was crumpling Papers and tossing them on the floor for his old wife to pick up as she swept . He did this as he was not demanding incessant readymade cups of tea or drinking to give her more tension .
Savita told Bhags on the phone that she didn't call out to him that day as he was getting in the car due to the 3 CHUDAILS that flanked him .đđđđđ . Although I wud personally call them the 3 DEVIYAAN , I understand her sentiments .
Savita has spotted Dharmu and Madhuri in a hotel and understood his BIGAMY SECRET . My guess is she will do izzat aarti of Karanjkars as her Badla from Vaishu and Sulo's condescending attitude and will be punished by Manav deciding NOT TO RETURN even if she accepts Archana now .Huh . Don't return EVER Manav , U can sit at sasural and wash the saris of The Karanjkar women and assure Archana that U will take care of her sisters IN BED .
Rasika Yawned when the K sisters arrived and started weeping .đđ She was interested and then sniggered when Varsha said I cannot become Maa . Won't blame her coz making this a PUBLIC SPECTACLE was Varsha's choice .
Bhavna understands tomorrow . I am so FED UP of Varsha as the victim that Bhavna's unsympathetic villainy may be a welcome change .
Decent Satish shone of course . He told an undesrving Varsha that he wanted only HER happiness . His eyes were full of such deep , mature love that I felt he is WASTED on the cultureless Karanjkars as a whole .
Oh yeah . Did I tell about the JOKE Slapochana made , feeling very very HUMOROUS or something ? She told Vaishu to send Dharmu to her for some Ma IN LAW SON IN LAW TETE a TETE . Don't worry I won't SLAP him she said with a chuckle I will only give him EHSAAS of his ZIMMEDARI towards YOU in ur PREGNANCY . He ought to TEND U wITH CARE , with LOVE . I gave Manav that EHSAAS only once when I gave him the CHOICE between Archu and Baby Sachu .SEE how he has IMPROVED today .SO will Dharmu . Dear Batat ! My Fav Rich JAMAAI ! beamed Slapochana .
Kools signing off for the day .Enjoy and CIAO friends .Muvaa . The most tragic part will be Manav going AGAINST his mom and siding with sasural in public .........when this Vaishu and Sulo had both treated Savita like dirt all the time in their arrogance phase . Wen Savita's time to do izzat aarti comes she has Karmic Punishments in store for her while they go scot free due to PHOOTA NASEEB and HEALTH ISSUES that crop up later . It will be interesting .
CIAO Darlings and muvaa .
Udne Ki Aasha
Anupamaa
Cricket
