FF: Broken (Last Part: Chapter 25

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teekay

@teekay

Voyager

+ 6

Posted: 12 years ago

Sidhi stood rooted to a spot, tears frozen in her eyes. Bits of torn paper was spread all around her. The room was dark and lonely - Kunal having already left the room after tearing the court papers and asking Sidhi to go away from him. But her own life was darker and lonelier. She literally felt pieces of her heart breaking inside her. How could a broken heart break more. How could pieces keep getting broken into smaller pieces, amplifying the pain each time. Kunal had called her stone-hearted once, she felt like her heart was made of glass though. Glass whose pieces kept breaking smaller each time, and flew in her veins with the blood, so that every inch of her hurt with the pain. Perhaps she deserved it. She deserved the pain for lying to Kunal. She deserved the pain for hurting him more than anyone had ever hurt him. She deserved the pain for being caught in a place where she was forced to hurt herself and her Kunal to keep her son alive. Perhaps she deserved the pain merely for existing.

She knew he loved her. But she also knew he hated her more than he had ever hated anyone. And she couldn't blame him for that. Kunal's last words resonated in her ears

"My Sidhi, my wife, the mother of my kids - she died long ago. You are not needed here, you are a traitor and a liar - I dont ever want to see your face again in my life. Go away- you're free to live your way. Or die, I couldn't care less"

Sidhi no longer cried. She didn't have the strength to cry. She had told Kunal the truth about Abhay, but he hadn't believed her. She couldn't even blame him for not believing her. Or Anand for not backing her story. She wanted to disappear if she could, but at the moment she didn't even have the strength to breath.

Her thoughts were broken with a voice coming from the living room. A voice which enraged her and terrified her at the same time.

Abhay.

Anand was hugging Abhay in the living room and talking to him excitedly about something.

The moment Sidhi saw them shock and terror went through her spine. She couldn't let Abhay touch her son. She ran out and pulled them apart.

"Abhay, what are you doing here?"

Abhay looked at her with a mix of rage and madness in his eyes.

"I am here to meet my son"

"He's not your son!"

Sidhi pulled Anand away and asked both her sons to go inside. As they turned to leave Abhay grabbed Sidhi's arm and twisted it "How dare you!"

"Abhay leave me. You have no right to touch me or my son. Get out of here or I will call the police. I am not scared of you any longer" said Sidhi as she jerked him apart. Abhay fell back a bit with the force, but immediately recovered and lifted his hand to hit Sidhi. Sidhi stopped him by holding his hand.

"Go away Abhay. Anand is not your son, he is only and only Kunal's son. You can never get him or me. Anand is Kunal's and I will never let you touch him again"

Just then Kunal came back home and entered the living room. Seeing him Abhay immediately stepped back.

Kunal: Abhay? What are you doing here?

Abhay: Actually I came to meet Anand, and I also brought some of his stuff that was lying in his old room.

Kunal: It's ok Abhay. He doesn't need that stuff anymore.

Abhay: Can I please meet him Kunal? I really miss him. I am eagerly waiting for the six months to pass so I can be back with my wife and son again.

Sidhi glares at him, shocked.

Kunal: Forget the kids, they're happy with me. As per your wife, you can take her right now for all I care.

Tears flew through Sidhi's eyes listening to Kunal. "K..Kunal, what are you saying...?"

Kunal angrily looked at her. Sidhi felt like she would melt with the heat of those eyes.

That much hatred. From Kunal. It was unbearable for her. She fell down on the floor.

Kunal (looking back at Abhay): Abhay, leave.

Abhay turned back to leave, but not before staring at Sidhi with a smile of victory. "Soon, soon, I'd get rid of you and be with my son again..."

Abhay left, and so did Kunal.

Sidhi fell on the floor, crying, but no sounds escaped her mouth anymore. She was broken.

Precap:

The broken glass lay all around him, with images of Sidhi in each piece. "she just wouldn't stop haunting me" thought Kunal. "How low can she get, lying about her own son's life to hide her truth. I cant believe I loved her. Or love her. Dammit"

Kunal got up. Alcohol couldn't help his pain anymore. As he started walking home, words he'd heard earlier in the evening came back to him "...Anand is not your son, he is only and only Kunal's son. You can never get him or me. Anand is Kunal's and I will never let you touch him again"

Edited by teekay - 12 years ago

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ramya

@rainbowgirl

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

Very well written Teekay 😊 Siddhi is indeed broken into million pieces & more if that is possible

She should leave everything & everyone & go away to some far away land & get her life back.

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teekay

@teekay

Voyager

+ 6

Posted: 12 years ago

Part 2:

The clock struck 10 and the sound of the gongs broke Sidhi's stupor. There wasn't anyone else at home except the two Anands, and Kunal had left more than an hour ago. Sidhi realised her sons must be hungry and went to the kitchen to make their dinner. The two Anands were in the room, studying. As Sidhi entered the room to call them out she heard them talking:

CA: I don't know why Mom lied about Abhay uncle. He has always been very good to me.

BA: Maybe she wanted to reduce Dad's anger. That's why she lied.

CA: But how can she do that. She herself used to tell me to never lie. And now...

BA: Yeah, and dad also got angrier.

CA: She did marry Abhay uncle and he gave her so much jewellery. Dadi also gave her so many things. And Dad told me he married her so she would stay there and keep me there else she would have taken me to some rich person's home who did not love me.

BA: Anand, you know what...I have always wanted my Mom and I love her but..

CA: But..

BA: But I never want to grow up to be like her. She is greedy and she lies. (sad)

CA: (sad) I used to think she was the best mom but...

BA: But she's still our mom. What can we do?

CA: I know. I want to be like Dad when I grow up.

BA: Me too.

CA: And I want Dad to be happy.

BA: And Dad is happy with Mom around. And she does love us. So I want her here.

CA: Me too. I love her. I just dont want to become like her.

Tears streamed down Sidhi's eyes. "How I wish, neither of you ever have to live even an iota of my life, my kids."

"I also want you to be like your father kids" Sidhi said aloud, startling the two Anands. "Come have your dinner" she said, and turned back to serve them. They looked guiltily as Sidhi went into the kitchen to get them their meals.

Her own kids didn't trust her. Her Kunal didn't. Sidhi wondered if she should trust herself.

After dinner, Sidhi put the kids to sleep and went up to the terrace. Kunal hadn't come home yet. She had laid out his dinner on the table but feared it would stay untouched. As for herself, her appetite had long disappeared.

At Santosh Bar, Kunal gulped down drink after drink, thinking back to Sidhi's latest set of lies and his own confession that he had never loved anyone more than he had loved her. At the moment, more than anyone else, Kunal hated himself for his inability to hate Sidhi like she deserved to be hated. In frustration and in anger, he threw the glass in his hand to the ground.

Why was Sidhi talking to Abhay like that. And was that a bruise he saw on Sidhi's hand when he was walking out. He remembered the time at Diwan House when he thought he saw Abhay strangling Sidhi and the marks on her.

Engrossed in thoughts, Kunal stumbled on a stone and hurt a nail of his foot. Blood oozed out.

"Even thinking about her brings pain. She is a bad omen. Everything about her is deceptive and painful. I need to stop thinking about her. This is all her deception. I wish I never have to see her face again" Kunal grimaced aloud.

Luckily for him, as he entered the house he saw noone. The kids were sound asleep. There was food on the table which he ignored. He just went to his room and crashed, hoping sleep would numb his pain somewhat.

Precap:

"...What is the point of my living? My children are safe in their home now and dont need me anymore. Nobody in this world wants to even see my face. For my family, Kunal, my brother, my sister...for everyone I loved...I already died 9 years ago. And if I am not alive, Abhay can't win a custody case against biological father of Anand. Even Richa would stop plotting against my family. I have only caused pain to everyone..."

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keerthi93

@keerthi93

Explorer

Posted: 12 years ago

It is really great , eagerly for the next part!😊
Keep on going!👏

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ramya

@rainbowgirl

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

The 2nd part made me more senti 😭

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teekay

@teekay

Voyager

+ 6

Posted: 12 years ago

Part 3:

It was well past 3am. Sidhi was still sitting at a corner of the terrace. The tears had long disappeared - she was totally dry inside. Kunal's eyes full of hatred were still in front of her. The words, the words were all she seemed to have. But they weren't her own.

"I don't ever want to see your face again in my life."

"I just want to never become like her"

"...you can take her right now for all I care"

"..Die. I couldn't care less."

She had lost. She had really really lost. She once had love, but fate took it away from her. Now, she was a despicable person who nobody could love or want. She had nothing and nobody. Not even a hope to look forward to. The time she spent in jail, alone, in silence, came back to her. It was just as dark and lonely. For a long time she was severely depressed and was under medication. But it was still different. She had a hope. Hope that she will one day be back with her family again. With her son. With Kunal. And Kunal would love her again. That hope was worth living for. So she had fought everything - the depression, the atmosphere, the loneliness. And she'd won.

But now, now there was nothing to hope and nothing to live for. She didn't feel pain anymore, just numbness. She looked at the moon and remembered the nights she spent, on this very terrace, staring at the moon with Kunal. Today, even the moon was mocking her. Its light refused to bathe her. Even the moon found her loathsome. There was nothing left for her to fight for. Everyone she cared for had turned away. She was not a quitter, but sometimes, eventually, everyone can be beaten down by destiny into submission.

Yes, she had given up. She was drowning, and she was no longer trying to swim or breathe. Her fear was gone.

She decided to look at her kids and Kunal one final time and then leave their side forever. Leave them in peace.

She went downstairs inside the house. She could hear Kunal's snores. She felt glad he was back and safe. She stood at the bedroom door watching the three people she loved the most sleeping soundly. She wanted to kiss them one final time, then decided against it. She wasn't sure anymore if her touch was contagious for bad luck.

"Some day Kunal...some day hopefully you will learn the truth. Maybe then you will believe me and forgive me. I hope some day you find out that I have only loved you, with all my heart and all my honesty"

Thinking this she turned back towards the kitchen, wiping her tears. Her job was done, and she couldn't take the pain anymore. She picked up the knife and held it to her neck. One of the benefits of life in the prison was one learnt exactly where in the body could a knife cut be fatal. Suddenly thinking something, she started to walk back up towards the terrace, with the knife in hand, when she heard a scream from the room inside.

BA had woken up from a bad dream. Sidhi forgot everything, her knife dropped and she ran inside. BA was crying and Sidhi immediately rushed to his side and held him tight.

"What happened sweetheart? Hey, it's ok. It was just a dream. I am here."

BA hugged her back tight, not letting go, as if trying to hold on for his life. She gently patted his back and calmed him down

"It's okay baby. Stop crying. I am here. I love you."

Ba relaxed, and Sidhi switched on the light and got him a glass of water

"Come on, go back to sleep...shhh"Sidhi tried to make BA lie down and sleep again. As she pulled away, he tugged at her sari

"I am sorry Ma. We did not want to hurt you. We really love you."

"Shhh...it's ok beta. I know."

"Nahi Ma. I dont know why you lied to Dad, and I don't want to know. I just want you here. I want to see my parents happy and live with both of them. For years I have craved for my mother's love. I know you love me, and Anand. I love my family and I want all of you with me. I dont want to miss even a second of this" saying this, he hugged his mother tightly again.

Sidhi smiled faintly and said "And your family loves you. You'd get everything you deserve, and when you grow up, I want you and anand to be exactly like your father. Now come on, go to sleep"

BA lied down and Sidhi felt as if a small, frozen piece of her had thawed back to life. Her children may not need her, but there was still some love in her that she could give them, for as long as she could, and God knows those children deserved their mother's love.

Maybe, maybe she could hold on to that one thing and live a little bit longer. The six months she had with her kids, with her family, giving whatever love she had to them - they were worth something. At the end of it, she would have to leave and she will. She will leave the world itself, forever. But she still had something to give, and she wanted her children to have that. Yeah, peace would have to wait for her. For her children, she could live through another 6 months of hatred.

Holding on to that thought, Sidhi turned to leave the room and close the light, when she spotted blood trickling from Kunal's foot, who was still sleeping soundly in his drunker stupor. She panicked a little. Kunal's pain hurt her infinitely more than her own suffering. She immediately got some dressing and began to clean the wound. Magically, from somewhere inside her, tears had started flowing again as she applied medicine and dressed up Kunal's injury. Even though he was fast asleep, the thought of him in pain tore her apart yet another time tonight.

BA, who hadn't slept still, watched from the corner of his blanket how his mother cried like a kid tending to his father's injuries. He remembered all those years when his father had been lying in his bed, in tears or in pain. He remembered how Kunal had held him innumerable times in the middle of the night when he had a bad dream like tonight. But he also remembered missing his mother in those moments. And he also remembered the few nights when Kunal had passed out after drinking and there was noone to hold him when he woke up in the middle of the night. Sometimes Seema chachi came, sometimes she didn't. Those were the moments when he really missed his mother the most.

As he saw his mother crying silently, he knew it was love he saw in her eyes. Love for him, for his brother and for his father. He didn't understand why she had done all she had done, but he knew he never wanted to let her go and live without her again.

Precap:

Kunal knew she was there somewhere around, but he hadn't seen her all day. When he woke up the kids had already left for school. Breakfast was lying on the table. His clothes were laid out. His foot had a big bandage where it still pained from the previous night. When he came back in the evening, the rest of the family was back, but she was nowhere to be seen. "Good riddance" thought Kunal. "Who wants to see her face.."

Edited by teekay - 12 years ago