Pandya Store|Episode Discussion#72|Rishita Bani Hero (RED ALERT) - Page 51

Originally posted by: funny_fubar

This is a great take on Shiva- I fee Shiva's pain.

I'll forgive him the dialogue of Tel Masala, that is just the dialogue writers being lazy.

But all this cannot justifying him pushing her in public. It is bad to do in private, but ten times worse in public. Poor Raavi is already probably fodder for gossip. They are married what- 1 or 2 months? We saw how the gossip aunties, they are probably more ruthless when discussing Raavi's marriage. What Shiva did probably further ignited more rumors instead of quieting them down 🙁

If they just showed him quietly walking away, I would have felt the full impact of all the points you mentioned. But now I am unable to 😞

Shiva can love Raavi to the moon and back. But Raavi reserves the right to not love him back. It can be a compromise for her- she should not be punished for feeling that 😐

Oh no no, I am not justifying Shiva's actions, I will never do that. I was just pointing out that the writers have sketched an amazing character, and it has lots of potential. Unfortunately they have butchered him completely just for the sake of trps.

And on the last point, that is exactly what Shiva doesn't want, he doesn't want her to compromise for the sake of compromising, she should have what she desired because he knows he cannot change who he is. I just wish that damn fool actually says that to her instead of bottling it up.

Originally posted by: Mahidev

I agree with initial statement that both of them are on different planes. However, everything that I have been reading in the threads, I honeslty think a lot you in the heat/anger of the moment forgot some major points about Shiva.

Let's start with the statement about compromise in a marriage, this the core pillar of making a marriage work, I know that even though I am not married. I read in a post that in arranged marriages there needs to be a compromise but we are forgetting that their marriage was not arranged in normal circumstances, it was essentially a forced marriage (Shiva's choice was taken from him by Raavi's suicide attempt and Raavi's choice was taken away by the emotional blackmail of her family).

You have to watch the whole scene to realise why Shiva does not want a compromise. Just prior to Raavi stating that they need to compromise to make their marriage work. Shiva says that marriage was forced on her, it was her helplessness that made her agree to the marriage, then she says well we are already married so let's compromise. The moment she said that I wanted to bang my head against the wall because it seemed like she was saying yes I was forced, you are nothing like my dream guy but since I am married, I have no other option but to accept this marriage. This brings back to the argument that she is doing this out pity and obligation to her family and society. She is not compromising because she wants to but she has to.

Second most important thing, I think this was already pointed out by someone on this forum. Shiva never disliked Raavi as an individual, he hated that she was related to maami. Him not wanting her to get married to dev stems from that fact that she was raised by maami and like anita will eventually show her true colors. So falling in love and accepting the marriage quickly was bound to happen because he like Raavi as an individual.

However, Raavi on the other hand hated/disliked Shiva the person, his core, his identity so he can't accept the care and concern shown by Raavi because it is insulting him and his love. Sneha appearance cut Shiva's wings, cut his heart out of his chest and crushed it beyond recognition. Sneha is Raavi in Shiva's mind, Sneha was repeating in verbatim everything that Raavi told her. It was a brutal reminder to shiva what she actually wanted (dev) and what she got (shiva).

Honestly that kind of blow to your heart, soul, and identity takes time to heal and unfortunately he doesn't get that time because he gets reminded of it at every single turn (like the diary, rishita's words, Raavi's unintentional words, and circumstances like the hing smell).

Sorry for the long post and jumping on your post.

Thank you for your beautiful post!

I think you misunderstood my intention behind this post. I have always believed his hurt is tremendous, and Raavi, as an individual hated his identity.

But, anyone's hurt doesn't rationalise his physical violence. Sorry to use this term, but he is very much violent.

I had felt equally annoyed with Raavi when she said compromise! I wanted to bang my head, too because

A. That's not how marriages work

B. It's sad that she isn't in love yet

You see, matters of the heart are more significant than the laws of the land.

It's not her fault that she doesn't feel the same way as Shiva.

There's nothing more painful than being in love with someone who doesn't feel the same way. His anger, his outburst and his pain is huge, understandable but will pushing her away physically in front of the entire world be justified because he is Hurt? No, right?

Healing, catharsis and soothing can only happen at a certain pace. For that, both have to be patient.

You cannot force love! There's a process to it!

Originally posted by: funny_fubar

This is a great take on Shiva- I fee Shiva's pain.

I'll forgive him the dialogue of Tel Masala, that is just the dialogue writers being lazy.

But all this cannot justifying him pushing her in public. It is bad to do in private, but ten times worse in public. Poor Raavi is already probably fodder for gossip. They are married what- 1 or 2 months? We saw how the gossip aunties, they are probably more ruthless when discussing Raavi's marriage. What Shiva did probably further ignited more rumors instead of quieting them down 🙁

If they just showed him quietly walking away, I would have felt the full impact of all the points you mentioned. But now I am unable to 😞

Shiva can love Raavi to the moon and back. But Raavi reserves the right to not love him back. It can be a compromise for her- she should not be punished for feeling that 😐

This is so true. I know Shiva is in pain and I really feel for him but that doesn't justify the pushing. His walking away- yes I will accept but pushing no.

Bold - exactly. Raavi has her share of feelings. If she feels it is an adjustment, she cannot be punished for feeling it.

Neither as a husband nor as a lover, does he hold the right to make her object of his temper tantrums.

And Shiva ( like the one we knew) should have been protective about her with respect to rumors as well. He has first hand seen Dhara suffer.

Loving the interpretations here from everyone...feeling good abt the characters and shivi relationship again..

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Originally posted by: Transference

Thank you for your beautiful post!

I think you misunderstood my intention behind this post. I have always believed his hurt is tremendous, and Raavi, as an individual hated his identity.

But, anyone's hurt doesn't rationalise his physical violence. Sorry to use this term, but he is very much violent.

I had felt equally annoyed with Raavi when she said compromise! I wanted to bang my head, too because

A. That's not how marriages work

B. It's sad that she isn't in love yet

You see, matters of the heart are more significant than the laws of the land.

It's not her fault that she doesn't feel the same way as Shiva.

There's nothing more painful than being in love with someone who doesn't feel the same way. His anger, his outburst and his pain is huge, understandable but will pushing her away physically in front of the entire world be justified because he is Hurt? No, right?

Healing, catharsis and soothing can only happen at a certain pace. For that, both have to be patient.

You cannot force love! There's a process to it!

You are absolutely right about the physical violence. I am not supporting that part, and I will never do that, I even told my fiancee that if you even by accident lift your hand at me I am filling for divorce.

I was just pointing out some points that got forgotten, a good writer could have protrayed his emotions in beautiful and subtle way. My dad saw the scene and he wrote such an amazing 35 page story in russian. I just wish it got played out like that on screen, it would have been amazing.

Originally posted by: funny_fubar

This guy seemed like a side character- he had no screen presence 🥱

The helper in the OG had awesome comedic timing and great chemistry with Kaka. They used him for comic relief- teasing Kaka and KM

I also think it was just for that scene, don’t see him making recurring appearances😆

Originally posted by: funny_fubar

This is a great take on Shiva- I fee Shiva's pain.

I'll forgive him the dialogue of Tel Masala, that is just the dialogue writers being lazy.

But all this cannot justifying him pushing her in public. It is bad to do in private, but ten times worse in public. Poor Raavi is already probably fodder for gossip. They are married what- 1 or 2 months? We saw how the gossip aunties, they are probably more ruthless when discussing Raavi's marriage. What Shiva did probably further ignited more rumors instead of quieting them down 🙁

If they just showed him quietly walking away, I would have felt the full impact of all the points you mentioned. But now I am unable to 😞

Shiva can love Raavi to the moon and back. But Raavi reserves the right to not love him back. It can be a compromise for her- she should not be punished for feeling that 😐

I agree with you. I liked their bedroom scene, keep it there but that pushing was awful, that’s where he lost me, I still have hopes that he will bounce back and set things right by first sincerely apologizing to her. I was expecting redemption but I have to be realistic, it’s not going to happen. After apologizing, I want them to talk, talk and only talk, no fighting and make an effort to listen to each other.

From what I feel now..the word compromise is a big No for a married couple in television..a couple who has begun to love each other is shown to be alike in daily soaps..loving everything abt each other..there is no mention of compromise in the television world when the married couple is in love..but reality is very different..no matter how much we love each other..we compromise on a hell lot of things on a daily basis..love is the base in which they stand..but compromising with each others flaws and situations are the running wheels in a relationship..

Since this is a show..raavi mentioned the word compromise..so as mentioned in the prev post this just fuelled shivas insecurity that raavi can never love him back..but raavis actions say a bit differently though..there was more to her compromising now than before..the previous raavi would never tolerate and make this much efforts to deal with shivas tantrums...yet he justifies his own misunderstandings, thinking those actions are her helplessness that she was his wife..she was stuck with him and since he knows that she is such a good women she cares for him as a person..as far as he husband concerned it can nothing be about love..and this bites him..Inferiority Complex is the worst kind of thing to happen in a relationship(whether they r in love or not).. and shiva is having that...and shoving her as a result of his own sufferings just paves way for separation..in real life I would say, they would separate mentally first..its like a slap on the good memories when one attacks physically as a result of one's own misconception...

I feel like,the show is moving on to Raavi's realisation of shivas love more than shivas redemption..because I have no other explanation on why they r not showing raavi thinking why she is ready to compromise when he is being such an asshole to her..she keeps telling they have to move on..but why..what is she expecting from him..Will they live like two souls one either end of the bed sacrificing their own life for the love and respect of family and relations?..shiva has always been sacrificingsince childhood.. he didn't even give it a second thought before what it could do it to him if he does that for the family..like stopping his studies...doing the mazdoori work in the store..because otherwise it meant his brothers have to bear those pain...during wedding ceremonies, there was a mini monologueof shiva thinking about himself "yeh mein kya kar raha hoon...nahiin...mujhe kuch sochna nahiin chaahiyein.."...thats shiva..he restricts himself from thinking before sacrificing himself...and now shiva is not ready for raavi to do that sacrifice anymore...especially now that he loves her, raavi forgetting her dreams living with him means selfishness on his side for shiva..and he can't accept it..its like a wound left untreated... .its stinging him..and showing symptoms of the worsening condition..his taunts and tantrums,shoving her..embarrassing her..all are the result of his inability to voice out his pain..nevertheless its like a disease..unless the wound is treated it is only going to get worse.

So unless shiva shows out his true feelings to her,I dnt think we r going to move forward with each other's realisation and understanding... and until then we r stuck on thera mera thel masala kandh...