A different perspective about Dhara - Page 2

Originally posted by: _charu_

I dun think dhara is pushing raavi to accept Shiva.. she is requesting her to take everything with an open mind..to think positively about it.. her life ..her marriage ..her husband ...dhara is one of the few people who know both shiva and raavi well..so when she proposed marriage for the 2 , she had the best intent ,plus , she must have had some idea that they will click.

Yes, I agree she has good intent but it is difficult to accept it when she's barely giving Raavi any time and space to understand and accept the situation.

Originally posted by: Foxii

Agree with you!

We really do forget that its only been days since Raavi got married.

I wouldn’t have had any interest in pehli rasoi etc... Raavi does everything.

If only Shiva was nicer to her or would talk to her about the Misunderstanding she would stop being so miserable.

Dev is the one who should get beaten up.

This promo has really made me curios.. there must be more to it than just the prank.

Raavi and Shiva are going to take some time to build trust in their relationship. It is not going to happen overnight. The kidnapping misunderstanding, plus Shiva's hatred for Raavi pre-marriage and now his lies about Krish's identity crisis - I wonder how their story will move forward, will Raavi stand by him right now or accuse him and push him away further.

Originally posted by: mahajanaish

Finally , I was thinking why are ppl not seeing how spineless dev is . He created teh whole mess , adding to that was dhara' s misunderstanding about the name R . Why has been telling Raavi to get on with life . Honestly I find dhara the most overdone character here . Zabardasti ki sympathy . Everybody should be taking care of Raavi . Alice u are a wonderful actor for portraying Raavi so well

Honestly, I would have appreciated him if he atleast wouldv'e taken some responsibility of his actions that caused Raavi so much pain instead of just crying and victimizing himself

Originally posted by: GrilledCheese

I agree with your point that beating is not the solution. Shiva and krish shouldn't have been accused of spreading ashanti especially when dev and rishita are getting away scot free with the exact same thing 🤢

And dhara definitely shouldn't be beating two grown ups with a stick in front of everyone! I wish gautam handled this situation. Dhara's methods are just overly dramatic with a lot of crying and beating involved👎🏼

At this point, Dhara is almost giving me Ishwari Dixit vibes. I don't like that at all. Her methods and actions, crying, emotional blackmailing is tiring. She's inconsistent and rash. Dhara wasn't impulsive. This may cause Shiva's breakdown and give other people a chance to mock him further. He has enough insecurities already. He didn't need this.

Originally posted by: Leoqueen

At this point, Dhara is almost giving me Ishwari Dixit vibes. I don't like that at all. Her methods and actions, crying, emotional blackmailing is tiring. She's inconsistent and rash. Dhara wasn't impulsive. This may cause Shiva's breakdown and give other people a chance to mock him further. He has enough insecurities already. He didn't need this.

They're probably setting the stage for Shiva's breakdown with this.. I really didn't want this to happen 💔

Yes dhara needs to mature and change this aspect of hers

I think the show's basic premise is based on sacrifice, which gives birth to more silence and tears.

Let's go back to not only Dhara but Gaumbi too. He is the same man who couldn't open his mouth to reveal to his mother that he had married Dhara; he is the same man who was comfortably sleeping on a bed with his brothers while his newly wedded wife was sitting on the floor in the verandah. He is the same man who was okay and agreed to his wife’s decision of not having kids and keeping quiet when everyone found fault with her.

He is the same man who gave in to the worry of his brother's lives without giving an iota of thought about Raavi and how bad her life will be with a constantly constipated and spineless Dev.

Dev is a monumental disappointment in the name of a man. He couldn't stand up for his love, went on leading another girl despite several warnings from his brother.

Dhara bears the brunt, and guess what, she gets bashed too. I wouldn't say I like her ways. Especially, her umbilical cords with the grown-up men. It's toxic and puts any person who will enter their Lives insecure and not okay with being a shadow of the woman her man worships.

Imagine a girl comparing a man to her jijaji? Will that work?

She has been the decision-maker, but we should back off and allow them to breathe. Her kitchen authority is also another lousy writing.

Trust me; such men never grow up from the Anchal of other mothers, and women as wives in such families have a tough time. Dhara’s life, sacrifices and love would be appreciated and NOT benchmarked for comparison.

Rishita is a brat and self-centred, but at least the girl had the guts to fight with the world for a man who couldn't even stand up for her! Had I been in Rishita’s place, I would had said f**ck off and go live with your family for all I care and would have never married such coward.

I was appalled at Gaumbi’s reaction when she broke into the wedding.

Coming to Shiva, I think he is so there for Dhara that his individuality is wholly neglected. His emotional outbursts are very lonely. He expresses only when hugging or lonely.

I don't see any point in hitting grown-up men at all! Shiva being a worse case as he gets hit so badly that too in front of his wife. No matter how frustrated she is with everyone, Raavi or Shiva don't deserve this.

Dhara didn't allow Raavi or Gaumbi to hit him, but she beats him. That's humiliation. Maybe Raavi has seen them from childhood, Rishita hasn't.

Dhara needs to breathe and stop being in the middle of everything. This is what happens when mothers don't teach emotional independence to people. It's easy to latch on to a caregiver, but it's so unhealthy to stay like that forever.

P.S- Loved your thoughts in the post

You write so beautifully everytime, love reading your thoughts ❤❤❤.

Originally posted by: Miss_SR

Hi Ushmi, welcome ❤. I'm Sofia. Do participate in the discussions more, loved reading your post! Here's how I feel about the situation.

I'm actually abit exhausted from watching all the tears...Dhara's and Raavi's. Also exhausted from Rishita's constant drama. I found refuge amongst the banter of the brothers.

Honestly I find it frustrating everyone in the house find it easy to blame Dhara. She's taken alot of heat even when it hasn't been her fault. She's tried to deal with situations to the best she can. Agreed that she's not dealt with things that well, some of it clearly backfired. And it's so hard to back her when she does stupid things. Gaumbi has clearly found more success. Despite her stupid decisions I'll stick with my original thought...they should question Dhara, but don't just automatically blame her. She's not a punching bag.

Raavi is a complicated character for me. I don't doubt that she's hurt, I don't doubt her tears, I don't doubt she's in an unfavourable situation, I feel for her. But like Dhara she's abit hot and cold for me too. Until recently I found it so ridiculous that Raavi has not mentioned Dev at all. The girl tried to suicide from it yet she's not thought about him, it's only been like 5days. It would have been easier to understand her had they shown a few of her inner monologues. It was such a HUGE relief when she talked about the wedding fiasco and Dev...you don't take such drastic actions for a guy then forget about him the next. With Raavi I found it annoying that she isn't willing to stand up for herself against everyone that has wronged her, she doesn't hesitate to blame Dhara and Shiva but not Dev or her Mausa-pa, both who caused and contributed to the situation. I hate to say it but Dev and Raavi are abit similar when it comes speaking out. I understand that Shiva has been harsh towards her, but what's harsher than leaving you at the alter? At the end of the day even if he's been the nicest person towards her she would have still said those harsh words about him too. She sometimes forgets that the hatred between their relationship is hers to own too (post-marriage). Pre-marriage Shiva clearly didn't want her in the house but he still never stopped it. Dev did. I guess what I'm trying to say is both Shiva and Raavi have gone through most of those incidents together - wedding, kidnapping, bedroom fiasco, tea incident, puja, bonfire, losing Dev initially, arguments with each other - Raavi abit more because of the suicide attempt and misunderstanding. But just like Raavi is affected by all of those, Shiva was too. So while I do think she deserves a break, I don't like her misdirected hatred towards Dhara and Shiva ONLY. It doesn't sit well with me, much like Shiva's manhandling 😒. I can only hope she finds happiness in herself first.

When Dhara said that 'ghar ka izzat' line I said there and then I didn't like that bit. Dev has and will always have a bigger responsibility towards his family. Dhara needs to be as direct with him as she has been with Rishita. Where's the tough love when it comes to him? One thing to mention, in this forum everyone have had different opinions when it comes all the Pandya family, it's so amazing to read...but Dev has always been called out to be spineless, coward, mute etc, and everyone has always called out for Dev to address the Raavi situation 🙌.

Coming on to the new promo 😒. Honestly I don't like it. I can hope it's not too serious but that's all it is...hope. As someone who keeps feeling bad for Dhara because she's been taking a whole load of crap left, right and centre, I feel disappointed. I understand she's maybe at breaking point, but again it doesn't mean you lose your head completely. How are you going to beat your devar in front of people who don't respect or care for him to begin with? You're going to give them another thing to taunt him with. Shiva worships the floor she walks on, she should reprimand him for sure but in a better way. They're not children anymore, and if they are they shouldn't have been made to get married yet. I feel disappointed because she's stopped Gaumbi and Raavi slapping Shiva in the past...but somehow they can't but she can? I can't help but think that they believe this is the method for him because he's hard on the outside 🙄. I hope I'm wrong and promos can be misleading. So let's see.

I haven't watched a show in years and I've forgotten how much melodrama comes with it 😭. Do participate in posts and the EDT ❤.

Hi Sofia! This is a beautiful post, wonderful analysis too and thanks for the warm welcome.

I think everything has happened so fast in Raavi's life that she actually needs some time and space from everyone, including Dhara and Shiva to focus on her feelings, understand the situation and place the blame rightfully towards Dev which has not happened. Everyone expected her to be okay with everything within a couple of days (let's not forget the drama that has occurred in these said days too) Girl needs a breather to contemplate and think about her life. I don't think Raavi blaming Dhara the most is wrong. Dhara is her idol, she can do no wrong in front of Raavi. Raavi loved and trusted her so much that she wanted to become just like Dhara. All this time Dhara believed that if Raavi and Dev get married, then Dev would easily move on from Rishita. I think this frustrates me most about Dhara and Pandya family to be honest. They all believed that Raavi would never suffer getting married to man who loves someone else! And they didn't even feel bad about it, they felt sorry for Dev but not Raavi! Imagine, if she got married to Dev and got to know later that he will never give her love or treat her as a wife, if this was normal ITV we would've seen this through. Raavi-Dev unhappily married, Dev-Rishita extra marital, Raavi struggling with her feelings for Shiva and god knows what not! Anything could've happened if Rishita did not stop the wedding.

Raavi has lot of faith in Dhara and when she realized that Dhara withhold such information, she's bound to get angry. Plus, Dhara suggested the idea of Shiva-Raavi getting married to compensate. Now, I wouldn't blame Mama here. He already has one unmarried daughter who left someone at alter and is unable to live happily, he wouldn't want the same thing to happen with Raavi. So in Raavi's brain, Dhara is the reason she got married to her childhood nemesis, someone who manhandles her, disrespects her, and has shown a great degree of dislike for her. Shiva, the guy she has strongest connection with of hatred. It's like she feels none of the outcomes are in her favor and no such thing would've happened if Dhara would've admitted truth. At this point, she doesn't have any expectations of even an apology from Dev, his spineless behavior speaks for himself.

I don't think anyone has asked about Shiva's feelings. No one is asking what he is feeling, how he is, just nothing and Shiva being the tough guy is keeping on swallowing every bitter pill. GauRa are taking him for granted and if it continues, it's going to be so tough to watch him fall apart.

The new promo shook me and caused me to rant for the first time on IF. Disappointment is an understatement. At this point, Shiva will literally have no one in his defense, everyone will be preaching about how his actions caused Rishita pain and broke family's shanti and what not. That little bit of joy and laughter we saw will vanish. He will go back in a shell with no one in his corner expect people who would either ask him to apologies, or forget about situation, or lecture about his behavior. Come on Dhara, atleast listen to what he's saying and what he is not saying. You are his family, you should know him better than this. I have less patience for FLs who act holier than thou but switches that on/off as per convenience. I want to see a fierce Suman protecting her Shiva.

Originally posted by: Miss_SR

You write so beautifully everytime, love reading your thoughts ❤❤❤.

Thank you so much! This is my first post on IF though, so it means a lot! :)

Originally posted by: NephilimByHeart

You have put everything beautifully.. 🙂🙂

Thank you! :)