**From & To Satish **( New Pictures Pl see pg 163) - Page 24

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satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
A woman and her son were taking a cab in New York City. It was
raining and all of the hookers were standing under the awnings. "Mom,"
said the little boy, "what are all those women doing?"

"They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied. The
cabbie turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell him the
truth? They're hookers,
boy! They have sex with men for money."

The little boy's eyes get wide and he says, "Is that true, Mom?"

His mother, glaring hard at the cabbie, answers in the affirmative.

After a few minutes, the kid asks, "Mom, what happens to the babies
those women have?"

"Most of them are cab drivers," she replied.

satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
According to a news report, a certain school in Garden City, MI was recently faced with a unique problem.

A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the washroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night, the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back.

Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. He called all the girls to the washroom and met them there with the maintenance man. He explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, he asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.

THE MORAL OF THIS STORY..
There are teachers, and then, there are Educators!


eclat thumbnail
16th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail
Posted: 15 years ago
Those were good Satish. 😊

Originally posted by: deepak_dinesh

Why do doctors leave the room while you undress? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Havent thought about the rest of them, but I do have an explanation for this. The doctors just dont want to embarras you, you would most likely be anaesthatized when they see you naked 😆
satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
There was a 70 year old man who loved to fish.
He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say,
'Pick me up.' He looked around and couldn't see any one.
He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say a gain,'Pick me up.'
He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.
The man said, 'Are you talking to me?'
The frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up, then kiss me
and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen.
I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!'
The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over,
picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket.
Then the frog said, 'What, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said?
I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.'
He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said: '
Nah, at my age I'd rather have a talking frog.'
With age comes wisdom.
satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned
to their first ministry, to reopen a church
in suburban Brooklyn , arrived in early October
excited about their opportunities. When they saw
their church, it was very run down and needed
much work. They set a goal to have everything
done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve.

T
hey worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls,
painting, etc, and on December 18 were ahead of schedule and
just about finished.
O
n December 19 a terrible tempest - a driving
rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days.

O
n the 21st, the pastor went over to the church.
His heart sank when he saw that the roof had
leaked, causing a large area of plaster about
20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall

of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit,
beginning about head high.

T
he pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor,
and not knowing what else to do but postpone
the Christmas Eve service, headed home.
On the way he noticed that a local business was
having a flea market type sale for charity, so he
stopped in. One of the items was a beautiful,
handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth
with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross
embroidered right in the center. It was just
the right size
to cover the hole in the front Wall.
Hebought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older
woman running from the opposite direction was
trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor
invited her to wait in the warm church for
the next bus 45 minutes later.

She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor
while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put
up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor
could hardly
believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.
Then he noticed the woman walking down the center
aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor,"
she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?"
The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check
the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into
it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman,
and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria .
The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor
told how he had just gotten "The Tablecloth". The
woman explained that before the war she and
her husband were well-to-do people in Austria .

When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave.
Her husband was going to follow her the next week.
He was captured, sent to prison and never saw her
husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth;
but she made the pastor keep it for the church.
The pastor insisted on driving her home. That
was the least he could do. She lived on the other
side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn
for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas
Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the
spirit were great. At the end of the service, the
pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door
and many said that they would return..
One older man, whom the pastor recognized
from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the
pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he
wasn't leaving.
The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on
the front wall because it was identical to one
that his wife had made years ago when
they lived in Austria before the war and how
could there be two tablecloths so much alike?
He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he
forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was
supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and
put in a prison. He never saw his wife or his home
again all the 35 years between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to
take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten
Island and to the same house where the pastor
had taken the woman three days earlier.
He helped the man climb the three flights of
stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on
the door and he saw the greatest Christmas
reunion he could ever imagine.
satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
Interesting facts aboutreligions
>
> Christianity ….One
> Christ, One Bible Religion…
>
> You know the Latin Catholic will not enter Syrian Catholic
> Church.
>
> These two will not enter Marthoma Church.
>
> These three will not enter Pentecost Church.
>
> These four will not enter Salvation Army Church.
>
> These five will not enter Seventh Day Adventist Church.
>
> These six will not enter Orthodox Church.
>
> These seven will not enter Jacobite
> church.
> Like
> this there are 146
> castes in Kerala alone for Christianity,
>
> each will never share their churches for fellow
> Christians..!
>
> Wonderful..! One Christ, One Bible, One
> Jehova.....
> What a unity!
>
> Now Muslims..!
> One Allah, One Quran, One Nebi....! Great
> unity!
> Among
> Muslims, Shia and Sunni kill each other in all the Muslim
> countries.
>
> The religious riot in most Muslim countries is always
> between these two sects.
>
> The Shia will not go to Sunni Mosque.
>
> These two will not go to Ahamadiya Mosque.
>
> These three will not go to Sufi Mosque.
> These four will not go to Mujahiddin mosque...
>
> Like this it appears there are 13 castes in
> Muslims.
> Killing / bombing/conquering/ massacring/. .. each
> other !
>
> The American attack to the Muslim land of Iraq is fully
> supported by all the Muslim countries surrounding Iraq!
>
> One Allah, One Quran, One Nebi....! Great unity
> !
> All Muslims are not Terrorists, but all Terrorists
> are Muslims. 60% of all victims of Muslim terrorism
> are Muslims.
>
> Hindus - 1,280 Religious Books, 10,000
> Commentaries,
> more than one lakh sub-commentaries for these foundation
> books, 330 million gods, variety of Aacharas,
> thousands of Rishies, hundreds of languages...
>
> still everyone goes to the SAME TEMPLE ...
> whether unity is for Hindus or in
> others…?
> Hindus never quarreled each other for the last ten
> thousand years in the name of religion. Only
> Politicians had tried to divide and rule… Keep
> Religion out of Politics and India will be the most peaceful
> place on earth.

eljay thumbnail
18th Anniversary Thumbnail Rocker Thumbnail
Posted: 15 years ago
Satish, the story about the tablecloth is a real one. It appeared in a Readers' Digest many years ago. It still gives me goosebumps to think of how God works His miracles.
srima thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
Thanks Satish for 2 wonderful articles. Truly amazing are God's miracles.
satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago
1. Ants don't sleep.
2. Owls have eyeballs that are tubular in shape, because of this, they cannot move their eyes.
3. A bird requires more food in proportion to its size than a baby or a cat.
4. The mouse is the most common mammal in the US.
5. A newborn kangaroo is about 1 inch in length.
6. A cow gives nearly 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime.
7. The Canary Islands were not named for a bird called a canary. They were named after a breed of large dogs. The Latin name was Canariae insulae - "Island of Dogs."
8. There are 701 types of pure breed dogs.
9. A polecat is not a cat. It is a nocturnal European weasel.
10. The animal responsible for the most human deaths world-wide is the mosquito.
satish_2025 thumbnail
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Posted: 15 years ago

Living in 2009

YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2009 when...


1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2 You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12 You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list

AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want to. ha ha ha ha.

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