Avni's Side today. Was leaving Neil again the right decision? Or plain

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Sila1

@Sila1

Beginner

Posted: 7 years ago

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I visited the forum today only in hope that someone else felt Avnis heartlessness like I did.

Okay I get it that she was protecting him in her pov. And she sacrificed.

But now.

Seeing and knowing the hell she's put him through.

But seeing what her absence has done to Neil.

Still she decides to leave him and bertray him deluding him to think it was a dream.

Atleast she knows he's alive even if not together. He thinks she's dead. His memories have blurred due to the pain. She dedicated her life to kids. What about the dedication Neil made to her.

This isn't the Avni I loved.

And in a way I felt she let Neela down too.

Becausr wasn't that the whole point?

Neelas upbringing difference.

She taught Avni to fight abd not give up. Why is she saving herself pain because she's scared to lose them. She taught her illegitimacy wasn't a bane.

Her choices were.

Running away isn't the answer.

Doesn't she see the guilt thats been killing Neil for 10 years.

The endless pain and torture of losing and the guilt of failing to save her.

Why Avni why?

When Neil finds out she's alive.

I know Avni hs suffered. But she needs to learn Neil has an equal say too.

I hope he doesn't give in as always.

She needs to aporeciate how fighting is scary but the way to go.

Not simply giving up

I am glad there are many eho connect with what I felt today.

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AvNeil123

@AvNeil123

Stunner

+ 4

Posted: 7 years ago

Avni came across a little selfish to me today. She only came close to Neil when she needed him.

Otherwise she was trying to push him away, make him leave in the auto or get him to sleep.

Neil poured out his feelings in front of her. Anyone would melt seeing his condition but Avni, she kept herself together and zoned herself out from feeling anything.

I can't believe that she cannot see that more than being needed to be protected' he needs to be healed. She's broke him!

This isn't the Avni we know. I just can't connect with Neilanjana.

Edited by -AvniNeil- - 7 years ago

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Mandy

@mandy0310

Alumni

+ 8

Posted: 7 years ago

I don't see what Avni did as selfish, just observe her flashbacks when she was going to kiss Neil only to remember the sacrifice she had to make to save the lives of her loved ones. The Avni you see before you is not the one Neil fell in love with, she is broken and she is emotionally scarred. This is a girl who believes she is nothing but a curse in the lives of those she loves, the images of her mothers deaths still haunt her. This is a girl who would rather live her life in a shell than fight back, she is running from life. It is not only Neil but those kids who have observed how Avni is. Sunheri has been trying hard to reawaken the Avni who used to fight for others, she was fearless and daring but this Avni is just broken. It is probably going to be one of the reasons why Neil melts because notice today he talked about what if things were different? What if they weren't themselves would they have been happy? Neil is going to get his answer soon enough, he will be with Avni but she won't be his Avni. Its going to devastate him to see the Avni he fell in love with is now standing before him as a mere shell of who she used to be, all those qualities he loves about her she has slowly killed with her identity. Avni is not selfish she is just traumatized by her past and what she stands to lose by being herself again. Sadly Daya despite being dead still has a hold on Avni, she still controls her thoughts and has instilled in this poor girl's mind that she is nothing but bad luck. It is easy to look at Avni and think she is heartless but when you go through what Avni has in life with all three of her parents murdered, the number of times Neil almost died how is one supposed to react? How is one not to be traumatized? Its hard on her, Avni wants to be with Neil just as much as he wants to be with her but its easier said than done.

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angelanisa22079

@angelanisa22079

Explorer

Posted: 7 years ago

She left him to protect him and his family. Vidyut blackmailed her to marry him or he would show the evidence of Prakash killing Neela to the police and then slowly destory her whole family. In her head she knew Neil wouldnt be able to save his dad either and she knows that Prakash would feel really bad knowing the truth and so would Neil as they would feel they snatched her mom away. Also Dayawanti's words have always haunted her as her biological mother died,aladdin (her partner in crime) died, her dad died,her brother went to jail and then Neela's death was a shock to her. Its normal to feel how she did that maybe its her bad luck and because of her - the people who she loves,around her have only suffered because of her revenge or her enemies.

She left him with his whole family..but she was alone with mishti and then obviously found sunheri and the children. She has suffered alot aswell as we cant forget what all sacrifices avni had done in the past for neil - going to Rangmahal to get juhi, going to goa for mishti.

Knowing the fact Neil is alive but she cant go to him. The number of times, people have pointed fingers at her calling her 'manhoos' 'illegitimate' - Neil has got injured and nearly faced death so many times so its obvious that she doesnt want to lose him.

Her transformation from being a fighter to now a girl who doesnt want to fight and is in fear of speed. She has always thought of what Neil told her - how he always wanted her to calm down and not fight for revenge and not to do anything out of the law and to be honest. She has killed her own self, her own personality - A girl who would fought to get her real name, her identity - she herself killed her own self. When Neil meets her and sees what she has turned into - he will be in shock to see what she has done to her self - he will not be able to take the fact that the fighter girl who he loved has turned into a shell, a fearful girl.

Seeing Neil in this state is really hard too, he has suffered alot too - him thinking she is dead and imagining her , putting his life at risk.. etc. Of course Avni has realised how broken he is..avni has realised . but still they havent really focused that much on how avni is feeling and her side of the story in as much detail apart from her transformation in her character.

She had the fear of vidyut doing something to neil and she didnt want to lose him to the extent where he would never come back (death). so she chose to separate but still she knows he is alive and somewhere.

If she was really heartless she would have just left him straight away but she didnt. She stayed with him and she really craved to see him and obviously if she is getting the opportunity she wouldnt leave him. She wants some more memories - After all its only Neil who will be able to break her shell once they finally both meet in full senses.

Edited by angelanisa22079 - 7 years ago

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Himani128

@Himani128

Dazzler

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: angelanisa22079
She left him to protect him and his family. Vidyut blackmailed her to marry him or he would show the evidence of Prakash killing Neela to the police and then slowly destory her whole family. In her head she knew Neil wouldnt be able to save his dad either and she knows that Prakash would feel really bad knowing the truth and so would Neil as they would feel they snatched her mom away. Also Dayawanti's words have always haunted her as her biological mother died,aladdin (her partner in crime) died, her dad died,her brother went to jail and then Neela's death was a shock to her. Its normal to feel how she did that maybe its her bad luck and because of her - the people who she loves,around her have only suffered because of her revenge or her enemies.
She left him with his whole family..but she was alone with mishti and then obviously found sunheri and the children. She has suffered alot aswell as we cant forget what all sacrifices avni had done in the past for neil - going to Rangmahal to get juhi, going to goa for mishti.

Knowing the fact Neil is alive but she cant go to him. The number of times, people have pointed fingers at her calling her 'manhoos' 'illegitimate' - Neil has got injured and nearly faced death so many times so its obvious that she doesnt want to lose him.
Her transformation from being a fighter to now a girl who doesnt want to fight and is in fear of speed. She has always thought of what Neil told her - how he always wanted her to calm down and not fight for revenge and not to do anything out of the law and to be honest. She has killed her own self, her own personality - A girl who would fought to get her real name, her identity - she herself killed her own self. When Neil meets her and sees what she has turned into - he will be in shock to see what she has done to her self - he will not be able to take the fact that the fighter girl who he loved has turned into a shell, a fearful girl.

Seeing Neil in this state is really hard too, he has suffered alot too - him thinking she is dead and imagining her , putting his life at risk.. etc. Of course Avni has realised how broken he is..avni has realised . but still they havent really focused that much on how avni is feeling and her side of the story in as much detail apart from her transformation in her character.

She had the fear of vidyut doing something to neil and she didnt want to lose him to the extent where he would never come back (death). so she chose to separate but still she knows he is alive and somewhere.

If she was really heartless she would have just left him straight away but she didnt. She stayed with him and she really craved to see him and obviously if she is getting the opportunity she wouldnt leave him. She wants some more memories - After all its only Neil who will be able to break her shell once they finally both meet in full senses.

Agree with all the things what you said.

Avni doesn't have any option other her past effect her present. Whom ever she loves are moving away from her, first aayesha, alladin, aashish, neela. Ali was the lucky one. But she even faced the situation where everyone thought Ali died. And I even lost the count how many times avni saved Neil.

When ever she tried to forget her past, something or the other will happen which will again let her stand in the same way again.

Avni always fought for her right, in this process she actually lost almost all the person's she loved. Especially neelas death who was her biggest support system. And the next number is Neil, his family and Ali .whom she won't loose at any cost.

She stopped fighting for her rights. She stopped living herself just to make her loved ones have peaceful life.

She left herself to give them a peaceful life. She left the battlefield just to make their lives better.

Avnis death is the foundation for whatever the life khannas are living now.

She understood what is the use of winning a battle when after winning none of your loved ones is will be there to share your joy.

Yes!!! Neil's condition is miserable,but even if avni wants to return to him after seeing his condition. She can't . The way she chose has no return path until so.eo e pulls her back. And only Neil can do that.

And avni not leaving her past behind, IAM loving it since it shows me what impact neela and her death has on her

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Sila1

@Sila1

Beginner

Posted: 7 years ago

I am so glad I posted and all of you responded.

Thank you for clearing the fog in my head and helping me reconnect with our Avni again.

Sonetimes it takes you all to point out the other sides and angles that I missed because I was so overpowered by what Neil went through

On second thoughts.

I actually agree with you.

Avni gave herself up for them.

Because she TRULY FELT this was the only WAY forward.

Because winning no longer matters if the people she loved were the cost to winning. No matter how right the battle was.

So what if she lost hersrlf. Atleast all that she loves are no longer cursed by her in her head.

She truly blames herself and feels its her selfisheness to have her loved ones close that cost her all her loved ones and she shouldn't choose happiness because its deadly to her loved ones .

She feels the life she led as Avni and the choices she made are the reaspn she lost both her mothers and more.

The person and choices she made.

Had she stopped and not reiterated neils love and shied away. It might have been a different story altogether.

I feel so much better already. Being so emotionally invested in the characters and struggling to understand why your favourite person made the choice they made was indeed a struggle.

Thank you to all of you for reaching out and helping me acheive some clarity.

I can't believe after last night I am saying this.

But I truly hope Neil understands what Avni went through because I have a feeling Shweta etc won't .

And Neil gets his Avni back.

Because if thry were simply normal than being the sherni Avni and supercop Tillu.

There would never have been Avneil nor happiness

Thats what they both loved about each other.

And seemingly both have lost.

So its going to be magical seeing them realise its only themsrlves who bring out the best in each other and complete a whole.

Their existences are intertwined.

If separated the other dies out too

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dsupriya

@dsupriya

Dazzler

Posted: 7 years ago

To give little insight Avni in her childhood as well was a peace maker who believed in making identity through her talents and work. There was a time Neela Maa when she comes to know the truth before marriage wanted revenge and asks support from Ayesha and Avni for same. Choti Avni that point in time refuses saying there will be no difference between her and DVM. She becomes vigilante only after justice failed her. She became a rebel when judiciary blamed her for murdering her own mother and framed Neela Maa. She was a fighter but became aggressive.

Having said that childhood scars are the most difficult to erase. They leave a mark on you. Seeing the deaths one after another and at risk of losing her family and Neil whom she loves the most to someone obsession made her step back. She left did her shraath in the hope that her manhoos saaya won't be a curse for them. Observe during bebe Avni conversation her expression becomes sad when she heard Neil has not moved on. Maybe somewhere she hoped he will be alive and move on after her death like he moved on after supposed Juhi death. Yes she may come as selfish but currently is devastated defeated that she has no strength to fight anyone. Additionally as I said she does not want to reawaken that Avni which Neil will definitely do. As she is the real self with him only. Neil aside Neela Maa knows her true self and loves her for it. She fears the real self as she feels that is a curse for all around her.

Having said it she is still a fighter who is fighting for the dignity of those children against all odds. I am really looking forward to how Neil will bring her out of the shell.

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Himani128

@Himani128

Dazzler

Posted: 7 years ago

Originally posted by: dsupriya
To give little insight Avni in her childhood as well was a peace maker who believed in making identity through her talents and work. There was a time Neela Maa when she comes to know the truth before marriage wanted revenge and asks support from Ayesha and Avni for same. Choti Avni that point in time refuses saying there will be no difference between her and DVM. She becomes vigilante only after justice failed her. She became a rebel when judiciary blamed her for murdering her own mother and framed Neela Maa. She was a fighter but became aggressive.
Having said that childhood scars are the most difficult to erase. They leave a mark on you. Seeing the deaths one after another and at risk of losing her family and Neil whom she loves the most to someone obsession made her step back. She left did her shraath in the hope that her manhoos saaya won't be a curse for them. Observe during bebe Avni conversation her expression becomes sad when she heard Neil has not moved on. Maybe somewhere she hoped he will be alive and move on after her death like he moved on after supposed Juhi death. Yes she may come as selfish but currently is devastated defeated that she has no strength to fight anyone. Additionally as I said she does not want to reawaken that Avni which Neil will definitely do. As she is the real self with him only. Neil aside Neela Maa knows her true self and loves her for it. She fears the real self as she feels that is a curse for all around her.
Having said it she is still a fighter who is fighting for the dignity of those children against all odds. I am really looking forward to how Neil will bring her out of the shell.

@ bold.

Yes it was so heart breaking. Avnk tries each and every route in legal way possible to get dayawanti Mehta arrested. But in turn what she got is pure betrayal from legal system.

At some point of time neela was framed for awyeshas death. Luckily avnu managed to bring her out and put dayawanti behind bars.

But aashiah believed dayawantis words and blamed this poor girl for killing her mother which she never did.

She went to jail in that age for the crime she never committed.

Neela was her support system from then on. Neela was not less than any angel in avnis life.

Avni was born fighter, and the best thing is she fights her battles Alone without anyone's help.

How can someone come out of their past seeing these many deaths?

Definitely her state is very traumatic.

Worst part is avni knows how to hide her pain. She will not let anyone see it.

But only neela and Neil saw the pain in her eyes and emptiness in her laugh.

And only they both can bring the fighter avni back

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srinithi

@AgnesFan

Sparkler

Posted: 7 years ago

Honestly I too felt irritated with her but just sat thinking for some time from her side . She has put herself in a position where she can't come back unless she is forcefully pulled . In yesterday's episode she did show her longing and vulnerability when she was with Neil. Her lines justify it " Mei har roz sauna dekti hon ... intezar karte hon us sapne ko dekne keep liye. " She longs for him the same way he longs for her . Difference is he is so vocal and Avni for some reason is trying to bury her feelings inside her . With Neil you could see she was old Avni who was scolding him to give his address or hotel key . I felt she was her old self a little while as Avni now just takes any thing thrown at her and has stopped fighting back as she feels war can be stopped only of she stops fighting.

Though I hold that there are other ways to tackle Vidyut the mental state in which she was has forced her to choose the path she opted . There was Daya whof taunted her to be jinx to anyone whom loved her or she loved . So she thought she could eliminate the lurking danger on her family by putting end to herself coz Vidyut would have definitely destroyed Khanna's one by one or Neil instead of all . If Neil ceases to exist Avni will totally go into an abyss from which she can't come back . I dunno whether Khanna's would have a peaceful life if she didn't fake death . At present they are still happy and peaceful except Neil .

I think the main issue here is only Neil's pov is concentrated more . If we get Avni's we can know what she went through , how she succeeded in controlling her fighting spirit and how she managed to find all these illegitimate kids and establish an orphanage . In all these struggle only thing which gives her peace is Neil's memories.

This was what I understood after thinking from various sides . I too was so upset with Avni yesterday 😆

Edited by AgnesFan - 7 years ago

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swati

@sweta2005

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 7 years ago

#10

Originally posted by: AgnesFan
Honestly I too felt irritated with her but just sat thinking for some time from her side . She has put herself in a position where she can't come back unless she is forcefully pulled . In yesterday's episode she did show her longing and vulnerability when she was with Neil. Her lines justify it " Mei har roz sauna dekti hon ... intezar karte hon us sapne ko dekne keep liye. " She longs for him the same way he longs for her . Difference is he is so vocal and Avni for some reason is trying to bury her feelings inside her . With Neil you could see she was old Avni who was scolding him to give his address or hotel key . I felt she was her old self a little while as Avni now just takes any thing thrown at her and has stopped fighting back as she feels war can be stopped only of she stops fighting.

Though I hold that there are other ways to tackle Vidyut the mental state in which she was has forced her to choose the path she opted . There was Daya whof taunted her to be jinx to anyone whom loved her or she loved . So she thought she could eliminate the lurking danger on her family by putting end to herself coz Vidyut would have definitely destroyed Khanna's one by one or Neil instead of all . If Neil ceases to exist Avni will totally go into an abyss from which she can't come back . I dunno whether Khanna's would have a peaceful life if she didn't fake death . At present they are still happy and peaceful except Neil .

I think the main issue here is only Neil's pov is concentrated more . If we get Avni's we can know what she went through , how she succeeded in controlling her fighting spirit and how she managed to find all these illegitimate kids and establish an orphanage . In all these struggle only thing which gives her peace is Neil's memories.

This was what I understood after thinking from various sides . I too was so upset with Avni yesterday 😆

I think Avni' s pov will be told later by Sunehri or Tara Sitara or Avni after her confrontation of Neil and Avni