AvNeil SS: Us Against the World | CHAPTER 15 UP: PG-39 (Apr 17) - Page 6

I had tried. Tried my level best to keep her safe, secure, and away from the eyes of all the evil that could even remotely harm her.

Yet today, it pricked me to see her before me, in a condition I wouldn't wish even for my enemy.

I thought that after everything she had been through in life, my efforts to keep her out of harm's way and my will to see her never have a fate like mine or her mother's would finally bear fruit, and here I was, cursing the day and the persons responsible for her this condition, where my little girl had lost such a big part of her life, and she didn't even know it.

Yes, I am Neela Parekh, and for reasons conspicuous, today I feel I failed Aisha Ji, and my Avni.

.

I was shocked beyond repair the moment the doctor told me that although Avni was out of coma, her brain had suffered through a massive shock as a result of her nearly fatal fall six months back and due to this, she was now going through a phase of partial amnesia, where she remembered only until a part of her life, and the rest were as vague as a baby's memory.

He said that it was crucial for all of us to keep her away from anything that could excite her or shock her, and that her memory was likely to come naturally on its own, in the form of episodes, and the coming months were not going to be easy on her, because these episodes were going to meddle with her present thought-process.

I had tried my level best to put on a brave face as I had finally mustered the courage to come in front of my girl and the next thing I knew was she had thrown herself at me, pulling me into a bone-crushing hug, as tears ran down both of our cheeks.

'Maa''

It felt like an elixir that cured every pain I had been going through since the past six months, the moment she uttered that one word, and it gave me immense power to try to cope with everything that was about to follow as I knew it.

'Mera bacchaa!''

I caressed her hair, as I wiped her tears, and thanked god uncountable times for giving me my Avni, my daughter back.

Yes, I hadn't given birth to her, but the connection I had felt with her, for her, from the time she was just a 12 year old, was way beyond the bond of the umbilical cord.

She was someone who gave me strength and was also my biggest weakness.

I never carried a child of my own, but I could tell that even if I had one of my own, Avni would still be the child I would love more than anything else and anyone else, because it was her purity, her innocence, her care, her love, that could win over anyone, any evil, anything.

.

It had nudged me from the bottom of my heart as I knew what was coming the moment she composed herself and I was prepared to answer the trail of questions that she certainly had on her mind.

For her question on Aman, I told her how he was no more Dayavanti Mehta's Amol and was now only our Aman, and he was the one who had saved Avni's life when Dayavanti Mehta was all set to kill her, because he now knew the truth behind Aayesha Ji's murder.

I was skeptical yet again to mention Ashish Mehta because going by the dates, it was clear that she had forgotten that he was not absconding but was murdered.

It took me a lot of courage to mention Neil, but I couldn't just exclude him from the story, though I could never tell her that to what extent Neil was involved in our lives, and had to rather just stick to the fact that he helped Dayavanti Mehta's crimes come in front of the system, and also, he had forgiven her lng back for trying to break his engagement with Rhea because he got to know that a criminal family the Mehtas were and the marriage they had proposed was only a business alliance for their benefit and nothing else.

I had seen relief flood through her eyes and my heart panged right when she said, 'The Khannas are nice people, Maa. I am glad they got saved from the evilness of the Mehtas. And Neil will also get a nice girl later. Rhea didn't love him anyway and neither did he love her.''

I tried so hard to circumvent the tears that threatened to fall down my eyes as my heart only said one thing, 'Neil already has someone in his life Avni. And that's just you.'' But of course, verbally I couldn't say it at all.

.

For a minute I felt like I was still startled by the fact that she remembered nothing that happened before the tragedy.

Neil.

The Khannas.

Ragini Pandit.

Vidyut.

Juhi.

Mishti.

The little girl's name reminded me of yet another day after that tragedy when Neil had refused to even acknowledge her presence in the house.

It was as if, he blamed not just himself, Juhi, and Vidyut, but also Mishti for the condition of Avni.

I remember how much she had cried when she saw Avni, her angel at the hospital, and her Superman didn't even look at her since that day. It had hurt me so much to see how she was used as a pawn by her own biological parents and her grandmother in this filthy game, and at that moment I had felt like perhaps I should take care of her.

But Neil had been very vocal that day at the Khanna House when he had said, none of us would be adopting Mishti and Juhi would parent her because it was her story to tell, live, and go on with, and none of ours.

It was for the first time that day when I had seen a stern, stone-hearted Neil, who otherwise wore compassion as his middle name.

It was as if, with Avni away from him, a huge part of his soul, which comprised of his compassion, care, empathy, and love, was all gone.

And that had broken me so, so much.

From that day, I had wished every second, every day, every night, for Avni's return, not just because she was my little girl and she deserved to live a full life, but also because Neil needed to return too. For the person in front of us, was just a walking talking vessel of Neil, not the guy we loved to death.

.

.

But look at fate.

Today that God finally decided to answer my prayers, it only brought with it another collateral damage.

Yes, Avni was here.

But even she had a part of her soul missing now. Her memories.

Her memories as Avni Neil Khanna.

And the moment I had seen Neil come to realization with that fact surrounded by his whole family in the hospital ward, where Avni had treated him as a mere acquaintance, I knew that the man came crashing down, as his eyes refused to blink, and fingers clenched into tight fists.

I knew whatever last thread he was hanging on to, had finally detached, and it was quintessential for him to hold on to something, anything, if he wanted to be alive.

He had left the spot right away while Bebe, Shweta Ji, and Prakash Ji had tried to make a small talk with Avni, and I knew that even though in the past six months, he never spoke a word to me, punishing himself for all that happened, today was the day he would speak to me, come what may.

.

.

But when I saw him, the sight shook me to the core as I witnessed an agonizing scene of him crushing his hand against a broken glass of a window, and I had screamed out his name before reaching the spot where he stood.

His hand was a mess of blood while his eyes only reflected pain as I took my dupatta and wrapped it around his bleeding wound, making him sit on one of the benches, and the next thing I knew was, he was not the stern, adamant, stone-hearted Neil Khanna anymore. He was a little boy, who cried and cried, cried his heart out like he had lost something precious, and I could do nothing but hug him, caressing his head, happy and sad at the same time.

Happy, for after so many months the guy who I consider to be my son finally cared to face me and express his vulnerable state to me.

Sad, for I knew there were nothing more than words that I could give him, for destiny had played a very cruel game on all of his, despite of no fault of ours.

.

.

'Why Me, Neela Ma? WHY? She.. she doesn't remember me.. she..''

He sobbed like a child while even I couldn't control my tear gates and caressed his hair.

He had bottled up so much frustration, so many emotions for all these months, and today he had all the reasons to let it all out, so I let him do just that.

'She doesn't remember ME! NEIL!.. My Avni she doesn't remember her Neil.. nothing.. our marriage.. or love.. our promises.. kuch bhi yaad nahi hai use..''

.

.

'Sssh Neil. It will all be better, trust me. She will remember you. She will remember everything about your marriage. Doctor has said that at this moment, we can't give her any shock, in the form of something exciting or revelations, but he has assured me that Avni will get her memories back. We just don't need to force it.''

I assured him, in a way assuring even myself as I tried to muster the strength to stay strong, for I could never see my kids break down like these with their lives being jeopardized at the hands of fate.

He lifted his gaze to look at my eyes, asking me like a 10 year old kid who needed assurance for everything as he said, 'You're telling the truth? She will remember? She will really remember?''

I nodded my head affirmatively with a smile, as I wiped his tears, and said, 'Haan Neil. I promise. She will remember.''

I saw a thin ray of hope twinkle in his eyes at my words, and I prayed to God yet again to never let this light of hope dim in his life, for I could see it in his every action, every word, every essence, that if Avni was not in his life, he would not be able to live.

And so, pulling off a voice of conviction I said, 'Neil, this isn't the time to break down like this. Your Avni needs you the most now. So what if she has forgotten some details? What's engraved in our hearts cannot be erased by our brains. So yes, maybe she needs a wake up call, but at least she's here right?''

I saw my words register in his mind slowly but intently as his thoughtful expressions were back, and so I continued,

'You know na how stubborn she is? But what she's yet to know is if need be, you can be more stubborn than her, and get what you really want.''

I waited with bated breath as I watched him stand up from the bench and don a determined visage, as his tears finally dried, and he said in a voice too firm,

'Yes, Neela Maa. What matters the most to me is, my Avni is back. And rahi baat uske memories ki, then I swear on my love, I will make her fall in love with me all over again. I will win her back. She is mine and it is time to remind her.''

'Be ready Mrs. Avni Neil Khanna. It's time to come home. To exactly where you belong. My heart, my arms, my life. To your Neil.''

**