TORTURED AND TERRORIZED

Shruti_sh thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#1
Hi everyone but I'm sorry to come up with this "fake ID" to contact with you all. I also started to watch Maryada and CCBM, and I wanted to vent out today.

PLEASE READ MY STORY:

I used to be a regular in IF some years ago (but not here, instead the Kiyunki forum). I hope I will be given the chance to say my story anonymously to people who might listen to my cry.

I used to be the typical "saas-bahu" serial loving girl who would fight for tulsi or mihir in the forums. Perhaps I were not so smart but I was happy! Truly happy, I smiled and giggled and cried on petty things. I have been my father's doll my mother's heart. I had a life, until I got married to this horriable man ...

He was an NRI and son of a family friend. I will not take too much of you people's time and come to the point:

They came, everything was good. Our investigation was not too intense due to the trust we had on our own people, and they always seemed OK from their behavior and basic information. The boy was mostly quiet, but I thought that maybe he is shy and things will get better after marriage.

After marriage we moved to Norway. And slowly I began to realize that these people have lots of complications. Unfortunately the biggest complication was with my ex-husband! He had another girlfriend (Norwegian), and gave no time to me. He seemed to be avoiding me, sometimes it used to be so irritating, but I had patience. But as soon as I knew about his affair it broke me. I didnt know how to disclose it to his parents or to my parents, but then more pain awaited me.

His parents knew all about it. They wanted an Indian "Bahu" for their home. While their "obedient" son was wildly in love with that "amazingly cold" woman who infact insulted me "FACE TO FACE" (so much for a woman to woman compassion or the humanity of Norwegians). Insulted me such (verbally) that I shivered back in my room for two days and nights.

As soon as I found out that his parents knew, I went through the most suffocating helpless period of my life. By this time my ex-husband had already shifted near his girlfriend, and surprisingly now he was bold enough to want to marry her. And what about me and my rights? Ofcourse, there was more to come for me.

When finally I had no option, even out of shame and pain I called my home. I couldnt share with my parents directly (call me coward). But I shared with my cousin sister who I am close to. She cried listening to my pathetic life and shared the information with my mother. My mother who brought me up with love, fed me her milk, whom I had always thought of my greatest support.

My MOTHER hid my story from my family for a considerable period (I was more shocked than anyone else). Infact cutting short - she knew about the "previous affair" of my to be husband with a certain GORI - but was assured that it was over and complete, and in such countries it is normal to have such a past. She was brought in confidence by many more such assurances, and the FAKE dream of my NRI life (filled with disgust). Such was her delusion that she had not only kept this matter a secret from the rest of the family but ALSO HER HUSBAND (my father, the only person in this whole world who I love).

Eventually when my father learnt of this matter, he wanted nothing else but me BACK TO HIM. After all the chaos, I was back to my father.

WHILE WRITING IT I HAVE SHED TEARS. I wanted to share this with the KIYUNKI family ... mere saat kya kya hua, main kiun nahi kisi se kuch share kar saki ... aur ab-bhi ek fake ID se share karrahi hoon ... yeh aap log shayad samjho ya nahi samjho ... but my message is that YOU CAN TRUST NO BODY, NOT EVEN YOUR MOTHER ...NO BODY!

Please dont marry anyone without PERSONALLY KNOWING HIM. Specially when it is an NRI.

The purpose of my writing here is basically due to my relation in IF, and my desire to vent out the acid which continuous to create waves in my heart.

A tortured soul,

Your friend.

(Please allow this post mods, even if you found I had a MID. I would be thankful if you do not investigate for the sake of my self respect. Of an Indian sister of yours).

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x-jas-x thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#2

I am truely sorry for what happened to you but I totally agree do NOT marry an NRI guy without knowing him. I am an NRI and I know many guys that do have girlfriends but go to India and get married because of their parents. When the ladies come overseas they realise what cheat the guy is and are completely shattered.

One of my cousins went to India to get married and I knew he liked this Gori named Alicia as she was one of my friends and he loved partying and hooking up with women. I told him straight away not to get married but he refused to listen to me and that his parents would hate him if he did not listen and loose all of his parents money. My friend(Alicia) was completely shattered and the poor girl he married got completely ignored by him(he was too busy partying and hooking up with other women) to the point where she went to India and refused to come back. They ended up getting a divorce. I realised what a horrible person my cousin was and how wrong India was to think that NRI's are the best option for their daughters..
Posted: 14 years ago
#3
i am very very sorry to hear this, i was in tears reading your story!!
It hurts the most when your loved ones who u are the closest stoop so low for their own selfishness!!
i am very proud of you for taking the right decision and coming out of that hell!! Not many women have the guts nor opportunity to do so.
Thank you for sharing your experience, i am sure many will be even more cautious now on!
I can definetly say you have grown to be much stronger and a wiser person from this stragic experience😳
God bless you!!
cheers
Kai
-Stutz- thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Stunner Thumbnail + 5
Posted: 14 years ago
#4
I am very sorry for u.. hudoas to u for ur patience n bravery! respect u loads
x-jas-x thumbnail
14th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#5

At least now you can let go of your past and look forward to your present and I admire your courage for actually being able to leave that cheater

.YixingsManal. thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Achiever Thumbnail + 8
Posted: 14 years ago
#6
i dunno why buh i had tears while readin this 😔 !! How can some1 do this 😔 !!! buh u seem like a strong person who can fight 😊 ! so please never give up n show tht jerk n his family tht u r a strong person ! n u wont spent ur whole life cryin abt it !! jst move on 😊 !!
Shruti_sh thumbnail
Posted: 14 years ago
#7
Thank you and I wanted to share for such purpose so you know. I am here in the forum and i write sometimes too, usually read. I needed to be anonymous for this post. If it would not be for my papa I would live like a dead girl. Girls I can relate my life with some of you teens here who enjoy such serials so much. I had that too.

I am looking forward to a career, I don't want marriage or anything right now. I want to be there for my papa. When I see him I realize i can trust someone. I love my muma so much but I will never be able to trust her. She tries to come near me, and I have forgiven her, but she was my muma ... whom can a daughter trust then? If my papa would not fight for me, I would loose trust on humanity. He is my all.


I like this challenging serial, and would surely participate among you with my real ID. I am sure you understand. The serial for me shows how girls end up as soft targets for any kind of abuse, which is so unfair.

All girls be careful. TILL IT HAPPENS TO US, WE FEEL THAT "THIS CAN NEVER HAPPEN TO US". I have felt this, in my teen years when I used to write in "Kiyunki saas bhi kabhi..." forum. Now that forum is closed, many of my friends there would not know what happened to their friend. If some are around then perhaps I sent this message to them.

One of you wrote about some similar story. I would like to say that this Norwegian girl humiliated me when I came face to face with her. Knowing all she still loved my ex-husband, and he has this new found courage to be with her. I am not against love, but I am against selfishness. I knew neither the boy nor that girl, so why did I have to pay? Could she not have stopped him?

Probably those two are married and living separate now. With me and my papa trying to sought out our shattered life.

Thank you all.
.YixingsManal. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
#8
Shruti ! jst spent more time here n have fun n be active 😊 ! jst dnt let ur past affect ur future 😊 ! n I Can understand wah u tryin to Pass to us Teen agers ! i dunno abt othas buh theres alot of Married Cases i have seen in ma Life which opened ma Eyes 😕 !!
.YixingsManal. thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Achiever Thumbnail + 8
Posted: 14 years ago
#9
@ Mc: Alhumdulilah Ima Type of a Gurl who cant take such Type of thing ! From Few Weeks Ma Driver Was tawkin Rubbish wid me, Which i didnt at all liked 👎🏼 ! so I came home n told ma Mom ! who told ma Dad ! n Thn Ma Dad Kicked him out of ma House n the job !! n this isn't 1st time ! such things happened to me alot buh i neva let thm Cross their Limits so i tell ma AS SOON AS Possible !! no1 should keep such things to em selves
.YixingsManal. thumbnail
15th Anniversary Thumbnail Achiever Thumbnail + 8
Posted: 14 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: MacGyver

This is so unfortunate 😊 ... why dont Indian mothers be more careful in their choices?

I wish these posts and stories could be shared with Indian mothers who keep on doing such mistakes.

I am married myself to a Swed girl, and my family at one point were adamant to get me married to someone from India! However, I didnt act stupid like this boy who stooped low.

But, think about it guyz ... is it that boys complete mistake? I have a friend who did something similar. I am not defending him, but sometimes the chaos some moms and dads create at home is mammoth. Even the sister's dont help in some families. The boy is ripped apart and then gives in to go and get married to the Indian quietly.

Is it not so obvious for a boy who spends a huge chunk of his life abroad to have met his love interest there? GET REAL PPL!!! ... Life is not a movie ... boys in western countries are bound to fall for western women if they come to such circumstances! Why doesnt the Indian girl realise this and take the investigation in her hand? ... Press him ... and this battered boy would definately speak up!

The boy is not less tortured in these circumstances. Perhaps he was lucky that this Norwegian girlfriend of his still supported him and took him back! ... Otherwise how would he live?

I am not undermining your pain in any way Shruti. But I am afraid that your mom, and to some part you yourself have been blinded.


AS FOR YOUR MESSAGE ... I AM SURE IT SHOULD HELP. AND AS FOR THE GIRLS IN HERE ... PLEASE SHARE SUCH STORIES WITH YOUR MOMS AND DADS WHO CANNOT APPROACH SUCH FORUMS ... SO THAT THEY UNDERSTAND THE REALITY OF THIS SOOOOOO USUAL ISSUE !!!!!!!!!! Plz share with them for God's Sake 🤢



hmmmmm I can Understand ! buh HELLO 😕 ! did the parents put a gun on his head to marrry her 😕 ! he is not a kid ! he can jst say it out !as jst to save ur self, he ruined 1 innocent Gals life 😕 !

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