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CONTEST : IPL 2026 Prediction Game

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abhishekol

@abhishekol

Navigator

Posted: 16 years ago

#201

i am not pulling your leg.... 😃

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*Resham*

@*Resham*

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 16 years ago

#202

arey aplya banner contest sathi..last round of voting

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Vidya Shetty

@vidya0906

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#203

Funniest Joke

Once Santa & Banta were travelling along with their friends Monty & Jaggi. On a road surrounded by forests on both sides, their car was attacked by robbers. Santa & his friends were pulled out of the car. The robbers blasted the car and took Santa, Banta and their friends in the middle of the forest where their boss was residing.

Now, this boss was fond of jokes. So, he put the condition that whoever tells a joke that makes every single person laugh should be left unharmed and alive, but if one single person doesn't laugh then the joke-teller would be shot to death.

Banta started telling the funniest joke he had ever heard, "One day........." and when he was finished, everybody were falling with laughter except Santa. So according to the vow, the boss shot poor Banta.

Now, it was the turn of Monty. He also told the best joke he had ever heard. Again everybody laughed including the boss & his robbers, but still Santa was quite as a statue. So the boss shot him.

Then came Jaggi. As he opened his mouth to tell the joke, Santa suddenly burst into laughter. Everyone was puzzled. Santa was laughing madly.

The boss asked him, "Why the hell are you laughing without hearing the joke?"

Santa said laughing and giggling, "Oh! How funny Banta's joke was!"

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Winn

@Winn

Voyager

Posted: 16 years ago

#204

ag vids santa la marle hote na mag jivanta kasa jhala to.

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Vidya Shetty

@vidya0906

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#205

hey wins kaay ga tu pan. it was banta who was killed na 😆

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Winn

@Winn

Voyager

Posted: 16 years ago

#206

ok ok vachle. sorry. majach joke jhala. hasa ata.

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Vidya Shetty

@vidya0906

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#207

A beggar walked up to a well dressed woman shopping and said,"i haven't eaten anything in four days."

she looked at him and said. ' God, i wish i had your will power." 😆

A man with pain on his right knee consulted his doctor.
Doctor said: It is nothing to worry about. It is due to old age. Patient: The left knee is of the same age. But how is it that leg does not pain?😆

Patient to friend: I saw the doctor to day about my loss of memory.

Friend: What did he do?Patient: He made me pay him in advance. 😆

Edited by vidya0906 - 16 years ago

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Vidya Shetty

@vidya0906

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#208

Hi friends jokes for a sunday afternoon 😊

Have an Affair

Banta, "All of the thrill is gone from my marriage."

Santa, "Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an affair?"

Banta, "But what if my wife finds out?"

Santa, "Heck, this is a new age we live in. Go ahead and just tell her about it."

Banta goes home to his wife and says, "Preeto, I think an affair will help bring us closer together."

Preeto, "Forget it, I've already tried that. It didn't work."😆

Final Examination

Santa reported for his university final examination, which consists of "Yes/No" type questions. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing it, marking the answer sheet Yes for Heads and No for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately flipping the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches his and asks what is going on.

Santa replies, "I'm rechecking my answers and I don't think I did very good."😆

Medical Prescription

Santa's father comes home from his doctor and, though usually quite active with his grand-children, seems to make every effort to avoid them this day.

Santa notices his dad avoiding the kids and asks him why this is so.

Immediately the old man whisks his medicine prescription out of his pocket and hands it to Santa.

His father said, "Read that label. That's why!"

Santa takes the bottle and reads, "Take two pills a day. KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN."😆

One Sardar was enjoying Sun on a Beach in America. A lady came and asked him, " Are you relaxing" Sardar answered '" No I am Banta Singh" Another Guy Came and asked the same Question. Sardar answered " No No Me Banta Singh" Third one came and asked the same question Sardar was totally annoyed and decided to shift his place. While walking he saw another Sardar enjoying the Beach. He went and asked him " Are you Relaxing?" The other Sardar was much educated and answered "Yes I am relaxing " Our Sardar slapped him on his face and said, "Salay, Sab tere Ko wahah doond rahe hai aur tu yahaan aaram kar raha hai."😆

Edited by vidya0906 - 16 years ago

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*Resham*

@*Resham*

Stunner

+ 6

Posted: 16 years ago

#209

Nice ones to chill out Vids...😆...

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Vidya Shetty

@vidya0906

Rocker

Posted: 16 years ago

#210

Indian Matrimony ads at their best

These are actual ads on a matrimony site. Grammar and spell errors have no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart!

Disclaimer : I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading this mail...

- Hello To Viewers My Name is Shekhar , I am single i don't have female, If anyone want to Marie to me u can visit to my home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...when ever u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter.. Thanks yours Regards Shekhar ~*~
> i want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN,GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework
(Homework?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever. she may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire life can run smoothly. thank you (The principle of running life smoothly was never so easy!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> she should be good looking and should have a service. she Should have one brother and one sister. she should be educated. (ain't it unique !! 1 brother 1 sister criteria !)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I am looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!
(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> i am simple boy.I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck now i am looking one gal she care me and love me lot lot lot
(now, that's a lot!)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> My wife should be as 'Shivani' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerr as in KSBKBT...... (Ok I haven't seen these soaps but I am sure he must be demanding too much, ain't he?)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast (by not wearing her jeans? What the hell...)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING BOY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE 1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.
> (all of us are loughing{laughing})
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like this she would be called the woman of the lamp (I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this boy wants)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and i love thepatner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok (I am again clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome")
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> HI IAM VERY COOL NUATHER OK MY HOBBY IS SEE T.V AND NEWS OK I HAVE 1 CAR AND 1 BONWL OK MY MOTHER ALSO GOOD OK MY FARUET WORLD IS OK
(the "ok syndrome" again)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I am pran my family history my two brother two sister and Father&mother sister complity marred (somebody please explain in comments section how to get married 'completely'?)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> iam very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent. i am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist. (actually what is this guy doing? Postal service or tailor.??)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> my name is muhamad and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes
(height of desperation! J )
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Iwant one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she havea frank she's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey. IThink the main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are beautiful. but iam not a handsome guy or not a good looking. But my Mom say that Iam a good guy. My father already expired . THE CHOICE IS YOUR. bye bye.
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> iam kanan. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.
(No comments)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON'T HAVE ANY HABIT. (maybe the poor guy meant BAD habits)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life happily.i divorced my first wife.her charactor is not good'. i expect the good minded and clean habits girl who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ... (but credit cards not accepted..???)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> my colour is black,but my heart is white.i like social service
(Zebra..???)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> i'm looking out for who lives in bombay , girl simple who trust me lot should be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY. (Now that criterion is a must, isn't it?)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> to be married on jan-2010. working woman perferable
> (this guy has fixed the marriage date too! But he is yet to find a bride. I wish him best of luck on behalf of all of us. I am sure he will get one soon.)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> i would like a beautyfull girl. and i do not want her any treasure. because girl is the maharani.
(Now she is going to be a lucky girl! Any takers?)
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> ssc failed three times and worked with privated ltd company which not paying salary at present.
(Any takers again?)