Rishbala SS: Upakhyana..Last part Pg12 - Page 8

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bonhishikha thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#71
I have read all parts of Upakhyan at one go but sorry not to have commented on your work earlier. Your SS is amazing .Its a rare treat to read a historic story on my favourite characters that too so well written. Truly it is superb 👍🏼 . Breathlessly waiting for the next parts. Please update soon.
Wud also like to mention, had liked your story " And then he kissed me" .
mimibm thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#72

Originally posted by: bonhishikha

I have read all parts of Upakhyan at one go but sorry not to have commented on your work earlier. Your SS is amazing .Its a rare treat to read a historic story on my favourite characters that too so well written. Truly it is superb 👍🏼 . Breathlessly waiting for the next parts. Please update soon.

Wud also like to mention, had liked your story " And then he kissed me" .



First of all, loved your name...and secondly thanks for appreciating both the SS...I hope I can write more like this 😊
mimibm thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#73
I am sorry friends for keeping you waiting...got caught up with the two OS... will try to update tomorrow 😊
mimibm thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#74

Hello readers, here is the concluding part of this Rishbala saga 😭. Unfortunately I had a writer's block 🤢, and could not find an appropriate conclusion 🤔. This one might look a lot like "Chandrakanta" serial, I guess some of you must be remembering it 😆. Still I hope you enjoy reading this update 😳


Upakhyana..a short tale of love..

Chapter 10- Vihana..the dawn..

It had been more than two weeks that Rishabh had gone back. Madhurya waited for him every day, and was left disheartened every moment. Every nook and corner of that hut reminded her of Rishabh, the path disappearing in the thickness of the woods reminded her of Rishabh, and the bed had become a torture for her to lie down. She would try to feel herself, every inch of her skin where she had been touched and loved. Come back, please come back, she would silently pray waiting at the doorstep.

Daima, I cannot eat this, the smell is sickening, complained Madhurya and rushed outside to throw up. Are you ok my child? Daima asked worriedly. I dont know Daima. Lately I am not feeling well, I feel like throwing up everything I eat. My head is also reeling, answered Madhurya. The old lady understood the signs very well. Take rest Madhu. I will get you something else to eat.

Abhimanas had run out of patience. He went to meet the ailing king. Enough you greybeard, I have had enough of your tantrums. Today I will take you to the arena where you will pronounce me as the king in front of all the people, and dragged him out of the dungeon. The king grimaced in the bright sun, as he had been in the darkness for more than a month. But as his vision cleared he could see what an inferno his kingdom had turned into. The houses were demolished, temples desecrated, people left homeless, children orphaned. What have you done to Vishishthapur you beast? You want to be the ruler, who will you rule? Ghosts? exclaimed Narasimha. Abhimanas did not bother to answer and hauled the old king on to the center of the arena. Hundreds of people had thronged the arena. They had been assured of a new tomorrow, and in hope of goodness they had gathered.

Hey people, look who is here, your beloved king Narasimha, the personification of cowardice and failure. He has come to confess his sins, his mistakes, the consequence of which you have borne with your burnt homes and murdered families. It is in your hand my dear people, whether to brood on his mistakes or to accept a new tomorrow, with a new ruler, proclaimed Abhimanas while holding the drooping body of the king. Now its your turn, old man, speak up. Tell them as an atoning act, you are giving them Abhimanas as their new king. Speak, muttered Abhimanas and propped him in front. All the spectators were left dumbstruck. They did not know where their king had been all these days, but looking at his condition they felt he had rather been dead. Forgive me people; forgive my inability to keep you safe and happy. And forgive my foolishness in keeping my enemies closer than friends. I am no more your king, you people deserve a better tomorrow with a mightier king, paused Narasimha to take a deep breath, and I believe he is here within you, providing you with hope and courage. Abhimanas smirked and walked ahead to take in the glory. Rishabh, can you hear me son? If you are here, alive, then come forward, Vishishthapur needs you, said the old king as Abhimanas looked at him in horror. How dare you, useless old man, how dare you pronounce Rishabh as the king, and pounced over Narasimha throwing him on the ground.

Before he could strike the king anymore, Abhimanas was hit hard on his face by the iron fist of Rishabh. You have done enough damage to this land, Abhimanas, but not anymore. I would not let your greed and power lust destroy the future anymore, yelled Rishabh. A fierce fight started between the two men. One was fighting for the people and the other for himself. The people present could not take it anymore. They had been through enough. Although their old king had made some wrong decisions, yet he had always invested in their progress. Kill the traitor, kill him, shouted the mob. Abhimanas clenched Rishabhs throat but before he could squeeze his life out, Rishabh stabbed his heart with his knife. Abhimanas loosened his hold on Rishabh as the searing pain numbed all his senses. His body fell on the ground lifeless, with the deafening sound of people cheering and rejoicing the death of their persecutor.

Rishabh rushed to the king who was coughing and panting for breath. Maharaj, I will take you to the palace right now and get help for you, said Rishabh as he carried him out. The king was too weak from the month-long torture; he could not survive long after reaching the palace.

Daima came running to Madhurya. Madhu my child, I got a bad news from the town, the king is dead. He was killed in the arena in front of hundreds of people, exclaimed Daima. She had heard only half the truth, with added hearsay. Madhu cried out loud, her hopes of getting back her life being crushed to pieces. Dont cry my child, it will affect the life within you. Daimas words brought back Madhu to her reality. She was bearing Rishabhs child. But the news of her fathers death instilled a fresh fear in her mind. Did Rishabh tell her the truth? Was he not after her fathers life? She had not known about anyone bearing any hostility with her father, so the only name that came to her mind as her fathers killer was that of Rishabh. But now she had an additional fear. What if Rishabh would want to kill her and her unborn child? No matter how much well-informed she had been as a princess, she was still a sixteen year old girl, with immature sense of judgement. Her instinct prompted her to run for her life, before Rishabh came back to finish her off. Daima, I am going to the town. I have to be back there. If Rishabh comes looking for me, tell him he can find me there, saying that she took some bare necessities with her and took off for a safer refuge.

Rishabh had been accepted as the new king by the mass immediately. He had an immense responsibility on his shoulder of rebuilding the kingdom and strengthening peoples morale. He had to get back his princess first to the palace and reinstate all her happiness. But his dreams were all shattered when he could not trace the princess anywhere in the kingdom. She had vanished in the thin air, no one could locate her. Where are you my princess? I promised I would be back for you, then why did you go away? wept the new king in his solitude.

Three years had passed since the day Rishabh had been enthroned as the king. He had put immense effort in bringing back the past glory of Vishishthapur. The neighbouring state of Narendrapur was also under his regime. Everyone praised the king for his industrious nature. But few people knew how lonely he was within.

One day his childhood friend Varun, who was also a member of his advisory committee, took him for mrigaya (pleasure-hunting) to a forest far away from Vishishthapur. King Rishabh knew this place, as it was near the ashram of Rishi Agnimitra, Rishabhs guru. The two friends chased around and hunted deer and wild boars. Hey look at that thing behind the bush, looks like a deer calf. I bet its flesh will be softer and more delicious than the ones we have hunted already, said Varun and aimed his arrow. No, wait, shouted the king and ran towards the bush. He suspected something other than a deer calf, and to his surprise it was indeed a human toddler, playing with the butterflies in the bush. Good heavens! Who could have left a child unguarded in the forest like that, exclaimed Varun as he followed Rishabh to the baby boy. Must be from Gurushrees ashram, said Rishabh and picked the child on his shoulder and headed towards the ashram. The child did not resist, as if he knew Rishabh for long. He smiled and played with Rishabhs crown.

As he entered the serene ashram, his childhood days flashed in his mind. He went straight in front of the Rishis dwelling hut and called out, Gurushree, its me Rishabh. Rishi Agnimitra came out and was extremely delighted to see his talented disciple. After exchanging few pleasantries, Rishabh enquired about the child. Oh god, Vihaan, again you have strayed into the forest unattended? said the Rishi and took him from Rishabh. Madhu, where are you my child? See again your naughty son had gone in the forest all by himself. Rishabh heard hurried footsteps, and as he turned, he was shocked to see princess Madhurya, rushing towards the baby. Madhuryas pace was also halted as she saw Rishabh with the child. A strange fear arose in her mind and she hurriedly took the child and turned away. Rajkumari Madhurya? hailed Rishabh from her back, what are you doing here? Where had you been all this long? I had searched for you every where? Why did you run away from me? Rishi Agnimitra and Varun were dumbfounded seeing the scene. Because you killed my father. And now you have come here to kill me and my child, but I wont let that happen. Madhurya, what are you saying? King Narasimha had been kidnapped and tortured by Abhimanas. By the time I rescued him, he had no strength left in him and he perished because of the weakness, replied Rishabh, shocked by her accusation. You did not even wait for me my princess. I had promised to come back to you and give you all the happiness, said Rishabh and lowered his head in resignation. Madhurya understood his pain, and realizing her own mistake, did not want to keep him in darkness anymore. This is your child Rishabh, he is your flesh and blood, replied Madhurya softly.

Rishabh discovered his life once again. Rishi Agnimitra performed the rituals in the ashram and drew Rishabh and Madhurya together in the holy bond of marriage. The king brought his queen and the little prince back to the kingdom. It was a grand celebration in Vishishthapur after ages, when the common people rejoiced the milan (unity) of the royal family. King Rishabh held Vihaan in his hand as he showed him off to his subjects. Here is Vihaan, who heralds the new dawn of Vishishthapur, announced the king and got a silent appreciation from his beloved queen.




Edited by mimibm - 12 years ago
tanuja.siri thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#75
And so they lived happyly ever after...oh my fairy tale has ended.it has ended so soon.bt dont wory if ever you want to reprise the story again then make a sequel to it...what say.anyways enjoyed the ss very much.thanks for pming me.and do write more and more and keep us hooked to your style of writing. Oh my god i'm the first one to post a comment😲 .yeay...me first..me first 😃.
Edited by tanuja.siri - 12 years ago
uma88 thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#76
I must appreciate your story, a very different concept and you did judgement to it.👏

Waiting for your next story.
.Shree. thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#77
Awesome Update 👏
Loved the end 😳
Please do write more 😊
Edited by Shree.123 - 12 years ago
LoseYouToLoveMe thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#78
awesome update 👏 but it ended 😲 thanks alot for the pm 😃 please continue ur os chalte chalte very soon & pm it to me 😊 please do write more on rishbala 😊 u are an amazing writer 😃 & whenever u write something new on rishbala please pm me coz i enjoy to comment first on ur updates 😆
mimibm thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#79

Originally posted by: tanuja.siri

And so they lived happyly ever after...oh my fairy tale has ended.it has ended so soon.bt dont wory if ever you want to reprise the story again then make a sequel to it...what say.anyways enjoyed the ss very much.thanks for pming me.and do write more and more and keep us hooked to your style of writing. Oh my god i'm the first one to post a comment😲 .yeay...me first..me first 😃.



Yes, even I was sad that this upakhyana was getting ended...but to be frank, seeing the lukewarm response to this SS I was losing interest, so the end may seem a bit abrupt..
mimibm thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#80

Originally posted by: uma88

I must appreciate your story, a very different concept and you did judgement to it.👏

Waiting for your next story.



Hey thanks for ur appreciation...but this story could not create much interest like my other ones, although I put maximum effort in writing updates for this SS...😕

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